The sun beat down relentlessly over Dublith, baking the cobblestone streets. The city's inhabitants paid it no mind; they were well used to the southern heat and went about their business unfazed. Hot and cold never bothered Greed anyway. One of the perks of being a homunculus. He meandered his way through the market crowds, basking in the sights and sounds of a thousand people—HIS people, the citizens of the town he'd claimed for himself. He eyed them all with satisfaction, a ruler overseeing his domain.

It was good to be king.

"Man, it's loud today..." Dorchet muttered behind him. The dog chimera rubbed his ears with a grimace. "You'd think people would be staying inside, not coming out and shouting at each other."

"I like it. All my subjects, presenting themselves for inspection."

"Well, I don't." the chimera whined. "I'm going to lose my hearing."

Ah, yes—the drawback to having a dog's sensitive ears. "Go back to the Nest if it bothers you that much."

Dorchet snorted. "No way. Loa's cooking lunch. I'm here to get something actually palatable."

Greed burst out laughing. Had he been paying more attention, he might have seen the two children racing recklessly through the crowd and avoided them. As it was, he didn't notice them until a blond form careened into him.

"Ow—! Hey!" Greed glared at his assailant. The kid bounced off him and fell to the ground, dropping a bag of groceries. "Watch where you're going!"

"I'm sorry, sir! I didn't mean to!" The boy apologized hastily. Greed would have left it at that and moved on had the second child not blocked his path. Another blond boy, about the same age, ran to his friend's aid. He shot Greed a glare—as if the accident was HIS fault—and Greed got a good look at his eyes.

His golden eyes. Familiar eyes.

The homunculus froze. The golden-eyed boy paid him no more heed, instead helping his friend gather the fallen produce. "You okay, Al?"

"I'm fine. Sorry, sir." The first boy—Al?—apologized again. Greed made no reply. The resemblance was uncanny… it was more prominent in the second boy, with his golden eyes and fierce glare, but he could see it in the first boy too. The facial features, the bone structure… they looked like Father.

They looked a lot like Father.

By now, the boys—and Dorchet—had taken notice of his staring. The gold-eyed kid watched him warily. "What are you staring at?

Greed snapped out of it. "You two aren't from around here."

"We came here with our teacher for special training." Al said, backing up a step. "She's waiting right now, so if you'll excuse us—"

Greed's hand snapped out and snagged their shoulders. "Hey, what's the rush? Let's talk for a minute."

"Leggo!" The gold-eyed boy wriggled violently. Greed tightened his grip.

"Calm down. I'm not going to hurt you. I just want to chat. It'll take ten minutes, tops." The homunculus steered the kids in the direction of the Devil's Nest. Dorchet followed, confused but loyal as always. He kept a hand on his sword and glared at anyone who looked at them the wrong way. The gold-eyed boy shut up at the sight of the weapon. Al clung to his grocery bag like it was a teddy bear, fear in his eyes. Greed supposed he should've felt guilty about kidnapping children, but—hey, they had something he wanted. And when he wanted something, he got it one way or another.

The tension grew as they left the crowded marketplace and entered the shadier side of town. Greed paid no mind to the questionable characters lurking in the alleys. They knew not to mess with him. Dorchet breathed a sigh of relief when they stepped into the sanctuary of the Devil's Nest. The bar was dimly lit and sound-proofed, perfect for chimeras with heightened senses. Greed pushed the boy past the main area into a back room. "Dorchet, close the door."

The chimera obeyed. The boys huddled close together, eyeing the innocuous room like it was a lion's den.

"Have a seat." Greed crossed to room to pour himself a drink. "And quit worrying; I don't bite. That's Dorchet's job."

Dorchet snorted. The boys didn't look convinced. Al sat at the table, curled in on himself like he was trying to vanish from view. The other boy wrapped an arm around him, glaring at Greed defiantly. "What do you want?"

"I told you already—I want to talk." Greed plopped down into a seat across from them. "What are your names?"

The boys glanced at each other, silently communicating.

"…I'm Alphonse," the apologetic one said. Al was a nickname, then. Greed looked expectantly at the other kid.

"…Edward." The golden-eyed boy muttered.

"Edward and Alphonse. Nice names." Greed sipped his drink. "You two look a lot like someone I know. You especially, Edward." He nodded to the boy. "And golden eyes aren't really a common trait, so I doubt it's a coincidence. I want to hear about your family."

Ed fidgeted uncomfortably. "We don't have much of one…"

"You've got to have some, though. Parents, at least. Which side did the eyes come from?"

Edward scowled. "Our dad," he spat, like the word was poisonous. Bad blood there, apparently. Greed could understand that.

"And which side did your dad get them from?"

"We don't know." Al said. "He never talked about his family. He said he didn't have any."

"Did he have a name, at least?" A surname would get them a lot of information. Maybe they were distant relatives of—

"Van Hohenheim."

Greed choked on his drink. Dorchet pounded his back as he coughed booze all over the table. The kids were staring…how humiliating. But that wasn't important right now.

"Van…Van Hohenheim is your old man?!" Greed repeated incredulously. "Tall guy, blond hair, square beard—that Van Hohenheim?

The kids straightened up at the description. "You know our dad?" Alphonse asked.

"By reputation." Greed ran a hand through his hair, staring at the kids in disbelief. They were Hohenheim's kids? Not descendants, but his actual direct kids? "…How old are you? 8, 9?"

Ed huffed indignantly. "I'm ten!"

"Nine," Al murmured.

"That's it?"

"What do you mean, 'that's it?'"

"…Just surprised you're not older." Greed glanced at Dorchet. The chimera sniffed deeply, then shook his head. Human, he mouthed. Regular kids then, not homunculi. Huh…interesting.

Greed stood up—he needed another drink for this. "So Hohenheim had kids. That mean he's in Dublith, too?"

Ed snorted. "No. He left ages ago. We haven't seen him for years."

"You're here with your mom, then?"

Dead silence. Both brothers turned their gaze to the floor.

"…Is that a no?" Greed wondered.

"Mom's dead." Al muttered in a barely audible voice.

"…Oh." Wow…that was awkward. Greed rubbed the back of his neck—he wasn't good at dealing with sensitive topics. "I'm… sorry to hear that. You guys have someone looking after you?"

"We can look after ourselves!" Edward snapped, eyes blazing.

"And we have a family friend helping out," Al added. He looked Greed over as if appraising him. "Mr…what was your name?"

"Call me Greed."

"Mr…Greed." Al frowned, but didn't comment on the odd name. "How do you know our dad?"

Greed drained the rest of his glass while he considered how to answer that. The full truth was out of the question, but lying had never sat well with him. "I've never met Hohenheim personally. But he and my dad are kind of… brothers."

The kids' eyes nearly popped out of their skulls.

"Brothers?!" Ed sputtered.

"B-but…Dad never mentioned a brother!"

"I imagine not. They had a falling out a while back. Hence why I never met him." Greed explained. The kids gaped. Dorchet mirrored their expression.

"So…wait, you guys are cousins?" Dorchet managed to ask.

"Hmm… I think that's the right term." Greed stroked his chin thoughtfully. "It sounds weird, though. Cousins are supposed to be the same age. I'm way older than these two." A grin spread across his face. "Either way, we're relatives. Actual blood relatives. Fancy that."

Greed spun around, jabbing a finger at the startled brothers. "You know what this means?" The boys' confused expressions indicated that they did not. Greed clapped them on the shoulders, grin widening. "It means you two belong to me now."

Their horrified expressions were highlighted by a crash of breaking wood. Greed looked up as the door flew off its hinges. A woman with dreadlocks stood in the now-empty doorway, radiating fury. The four men stared like deer in headlights for a moment before the boys sprang up.

"Teacher! We're sorry—"

"It was this guy's fault! He made us go with him!"

"We didn't want to!"

"His friend has a sword!"

The woman turned her death-gaze to Greed. He backed up a step as she stalked towards him. Dorchet—loyal dog that he was—stepped in front of him, but the woman batted him aside like a fly. She grabbed Greed by the vest and dragged him down to her eye-level.

"I'll have words with you two in a minute," the woman told the boys. She then leveled her scorching gaze at Greed. "If there weren't children present, I would rip your head off. As it is, I'll give you one warning: never touch my students again."

Greed held up his hands in surrender. "Chill, lady. I didn't hurt them, I just wanted to chat with my family a bit."

The woman raised an eyebrow. "They told me they didn't have any family left."

"They didn't know about me. And I didn't know about them until I saw Amber-Eyes Ed there." Greed pointed to Edward, who huffed at the nickname. The woman looked skeptical.

"They look nothing like you. You expect me to believe you brought a pair of kids to the bad side of town—against their will—on the chance that they were related to you?"

Greed shrugged. "It's a small world, huh?"

" ...He didn't hurt us, Teacher." The adults turned as Al spoke softly. "And he knew who our dad was. I…think he's telling the truth."

"Hmmph." The woman looked Greed over. Her gaze was still fierce, but now she seemed more appraising than murderous. "…Boys, we're going home." She released Greed, jabbing his chest. "I'll be back in an hour for answers. If I don't like what I hear, I will end you."

"I'll see you in an hour, then." Greed gave his most dazzling smile. The woman, unimpressed, turned and herded the boys out of the door. Alphonse glanced back as they left, watching Greed uncertainly. Greed waved until they were out of sight.

"…That lady was scary," Dorchet observed.

"Very." Greed rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "This has been an interesting day."

"Got that right…" The chimera muttered. "So…cousins, huh? What are you going to do now?"

"Make them mine, naturally." Greed rubbed his hands together in anticipation. "First, I'll convince Scary Lady that they're safe with me. Then I'll win their undying love and affection so they never want to leave."

Dorchet frowns. "You're going to bring them into the Nest? Aren't they a bit young for that?"

"It's never too early to recruit minions. Besides, they're my family. And you know how I feel about things that are mine."

"If they tell people about us—"

Greed waved away his concerns. "They don't need to know all our deep dark secrets. Not yet, anyways. I am a perfectly normal human being with perfectly normal employees who wants to get to know his cousins." Greed frowned. "Cousins…that still sounds weird. They're so little."

"Kinda does. You look more like you'd be their uncle, age-wise."

Greed snapped his fingers. "Uncle Greed! I like it!" He grinned at Dorchet. "Go get Bido. I want him to scout out that lady, find out who she is. The rest of you guys tidy up the place."

Dorchet cocked his head. "Why?"

"You heard Scary Lady. She's coming back in an hour. And this uncle needs to make a good impression."