AN: As promised, and done a lot quicker than expected. Forgive the inaccuracy of any medical tests/treatments in this chapter - I think you'll get the idea regardless.

The door closed behind her not a moment before the glass in her hand shattered against the opposite wall. She slid down to the floor in agony, wishing again that she could wake up somewhere else.

Her feet ached, her back, her shoulders, her heart. Everything that Kanan usually fixed for her, it was all broken. She'd never felt so tired or so alone. Her eyes landed on the bed they shared a lifetime ago. At least, that's how it felt. A lifetime had passed since the last time she was with him.

She climbed across the floor and into bed, collapsing on top of the covers, too tired to notice the chill in the air. Her arm fell across the empty half next to her. "Kanan," she whispered as her eyes close of their own volition.

She woke after a few hours of fitful sleep to the feeling of intense nausea. Her instinct was to sit up, but the moment she shifted upright, the room shifted the other way, and she stumbled awkwardly onto the floor. She lay down and took a few steadying breaths. This was her life now. Her life without Kanan. She couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't even stand up, without everything falling apart.

She pushed herself off of the floor with a huff, determined to stop feeling so sorry for herself, but the floor refused to let her leave, and she was too tired to fight it as black took over her consciousness.

"Hera!" Hera mumbled sleepily as she vaguely registered someone calling her name. "Hera!" A hand shook her shoulder while another gently touched her forehead. She blinked open her eyes to find Sabine kneeling next to her.

"Hera! You had me worried sick! Are you alright?" Sabine helped her up to a sitting position and steadied her as she tried to ground herself.

Am I alright? she wondered to herself. What was I doing?

"Did you faint?" Sabine interrupted her thoughts. "You've hardly eaten anything since...well, I haven't seen you eat anything since..." Hera gently pushed away Sabine's supportive hand.

"I'm fine, Sabine. Just tired." Sabine didn't look reassured, but Hera didn't care. Not today. Sabine continued to look at her with that appraising stare, and Hera withered with discomfort.

"Sabine, really, I'm fine," Hera said as she willed herself to stand. She swayed slightly, but the intense dizziness from before had passed. She moved to pass Sabine and leave the cabin, but she hesitated when she saw Sabine's worried expression.

"Thank you for coming to check on me. It's just been a long few days, that's all." Hera cupped her hand affectionately around Sabine's cheek before turning into the hall. Sabine followed silently.

When they arrived in the galley a few moments later, they found Ezra and Zeb sitting at the table, staring aimlessly into their cups. Ezra looked up, startled when they entered, but Zeb gave no indication that he'd noticed them.

"Hera," Ezra stood and approached her. "We were worried. You've been asleep for ages." Zeb noticed her now and also approached with that same look of apprehension Sabine had worn.

"Why don't you let us take a look at you? Just to make sure you're alright?"

Hera fought the irritation bubbling up inside her. She knew their nagging, no, their concern was because they loved her. She took a deep breath and let the irritation pass before meeting Zeb's gaze.

"You're all so wonderful. I don't know what I'd do without you. But I promise, I'm alright. I just need some time." Whether that would be the end of it, Hera didn't know, but they all seemed to accept it for now.

"Is there any more kaffe?" she asked as she grabbed a cup. Someone answered in the affirmative, but she'd already started pouring herself a cup. She enjoyed the soothing sensation of the hot liquid as it warmed the cup in her hands, but as she raised it to her lips, the sensation faded in favor of the now familiar nausea.

She sighed as she slammed the cup down and attempted to clear the nausea with a cleansing breath. She knew if she turned around they'd all be staring at her with that look again. Instead, she turned straight toward the door and began walking toward the cockpit without sparing a glance for anyone.

Once alone, she sank into the captain's chair with exhaustion.

"Kanan," she spoke sadly, knowing that he couldn't answer but still desperately hoping he somehow would anyway. It was so difficult to believe he was gone. If she stopped thinking about it, she could almost fall into a rhythm where he was just off on a mission and she was busy here on the Ghost, and they'd be together again any day. But as soon as she realized she'd stopped thinking about it, she remembered. He wasn't on a mission, and they wouldn't be together ever again.

The nausea overwhelmed her again, and this time, she couldn't fight it. She scrambled for the waste bin in the corner and barely managed to avoid vomiting on the floor. The tears began.

"How could you just leave me?" she demanded of him. She sat pathetically on the floor like some kind of shell of who she was days before. She heard the door open and turned in a panic, afraid to share her moment of vulnerability with anyone, but Chopper was the only one that came in.

"It's alright, Chop," she answered his beeping. He fired back. So did she. "I keep telling everyone I'm alright because I am. You think Kanan's the first person..." her angry reply was cut off when she once again couldn't resist the urge to empty her stomach.

Chopper reached out his tiny mechanical hand and took hers with a chorus of beeps.

"Fine," Hera answered with a reluctant sigh. "But I'm not asking for help. I can find my way around the med bay on my own."

Chopper seem satisfied enough with that statement and left her in silence once again.

True to her word, she made her way to the med bay. After locking the doors, she carefully removed her clothing, wincing as the cloth brushed across the bruises on her chest, and she took in the extent of the damage that had been done for the first time. The torture, their escape, Ezra's mission...the evidence of the last few days spoke volumes across her flesh.

She applied antiseptic to a few spots and wrapped a few bandages, but much of the damage was bruising that simply needed time to heal on its own. Last, she grabbed a hypo to draw a small sample of blood. Missing Kanan was excruciating both emotionally and physically, but she hoped the nausea and dizziness she'd been feeling was down to malnourishment. At least malnourishment she could fix.

She inserted the slide into the diagnostic and lay back on the small cot to wait for the results. She had almost fallen asleep when a soft beeping alerted her that the diagnostic was finished. Rubbing the exhaustion away from her eyes, she sat up to read the results.

She skimmed through the results output for the relevant analysis and suggested treatments. "Sodium's off," she muttered to herself. "Of course it is, it's not like they were concerned about my hydration. Iron's low. That's easy enough to fix. Elevated HCG...hmm...where have I heard that before?" She scrolled to the bottom of the results and promptly dropped the diagnostic unit.

Pregnancy. Elevated HCG was associated with pregnancy.

Emotions slammed into her from all sides. She couldn't think. She couldn't breathe. It wasn't possible. Or was it? Well, of course it was possible, but...

She scrambled for another hypo and re-programmed the diagnostic. It was a fluke. Probably just the stress. Stress could probably do that, right? It took her a moment to insert the new slide with shaking hands, but she managed. While she waited, she searched the database for alternate explanations for the result. Reference after reference told her that elevated HCG combined with her nausea, exhaustion and dizziness really only meant one thing. Come to think of it, her breasts had felt awfully sensitive while getting dressed and undressed lately, but she'd assumed it was residual discomfort from her restraints. And when was her last cycle? She couldn't remember.

The diagnostic beeped again, and again, the results read the same thing. Panic rose in her chest. She searched the diagnostic database for a pregnancy specific test and ran it again.

Pregnant...6 weeks...male... Her brain couldn't process anything else beyond that. Tears came unbidden to her eyes as she began to hyperventilate.

She couldn't tell if she was happy, afraid, exhilarated, angry or some other unnamed emotion that somehow encompassed them all.

It explained everything. Well, not everything. Kanan was still...Kanan. With that thought, she sank into despair. Kanan would never know. She could never tell him. Her son would never know his father. Her son. Their son. She covered her face with a nearby pillow, afraid that her cries would bring someone running.

She didn't know how long she cried, but when she stopped, it was only because she couldn't physically do it anymore. Her hand found its way to rest on her stomach, and all at once, determination overtook her despair. This was their child. Hers and Kanan's. It had somehow survived Pryce, and she couldn't let something as simple as dehydration take him from her now.

She rummaged through the cabinets for an electrolyte solution and iron pills, washing down the first dose of pills with the solution.

Later as she lay in bed, she stroked gentle patterns on her abdomen. "Your father would have loved you so much, little one. He gave his life for you, even if he didn't know." She thought about Kanan, about how fiercely he held her gaze in those final moments when they realized what was going to happen.

"He would've protected you. He wanted you." She remembered the fight they had about what they would do after the rebellion. She couldn't think that far ahead, and he couldn't wait to get there. He'd never outright said he wanted children, but she could tell. She knew.

"I'll protect you now."

A sharp knock at the door caused her to briefly freeze before hastily pulling down her shirt. She would tell them, just not yet. She opened the door and found Sabine at the other side.

"Sorry if you were asleep," Sabine said with an apologetic glance towards the ruffled blankets. "I just wanted to tell you that there's food. Zeb made it, but it's surprisingly edible." Hera gave her an indulgent smile as Zeb grumbled a defense of his culinary skills from up the hall.

Her first instinct was to decline and go back to bed, but in a rush, her promise came back to her. I'll protect you now.

She stepped out into the hall next to Sabine who had the sense to hide her surprised look as quickly as it had come.

"After you."