Hidan, a handsome twenty-two year old with slicked back silver hair and piercing violet eyes, fidgeted in the stiff wooden chair. He and his lawyer, a young woman with blue hair and a fierce reputation, waited for the jury to return with their final decision.

"Konan this is taking too damn long," Hidan pressedhis fingernails into his palms underneath the table, "if those asses take any longer on this verdict thing I'm gonna have a fucking heart attack. Can you do something? Say something? Anything?"

"There isn't anymore we can do," She said, "We did our best and now we can only wait."

Hidan put his face in his hands and rubbed his eyes. The past two in a half years had led up to this moment; going to court, and dealing with media assholes that stuck to him like parasites after this whole debacle went public. His face and story were everywhere and they all read similar headlines: "78 Killed In Bloody Cult Mass Murder", "Soul Survivor of Jashinist Cult Confessed To Killing", "Jashinist Cult Member Says Only Regret Is That He Wasn't Killed", "Jashinist Cult Member To Be Tried For Death Penalty", and, Hidan's personal tabliod favorite, "Is It Me Or Is The Jashinist Cult Killer Hot?"

Just three years ago, Hidan was found in a bloody mess of bodies inside a large hostel, far outside the limits of the closest suburban city. He remembered fighting the police in the dark of night, and begging them not to drag him away from the bloodshed, but that was it. Hidan couldn't remember what happened before and, if he was honest with himself, much of what happened after. The days bled together in a blur of lights, voices, and headaches.

He also remembered the smell of the freshly dead. It was the one thing he couldn't forget. For some reason his mind didn't want to.

After he was found he was brought to a hospital, where no wounds were found on his person save for a few scratches, and questioned by the authorities. Hidan tried to speak, but couldn't quite come back to the reality of what was happening.

"What's your name, son?" The police officer asked.

"He's in shock," The other officer added. The first sighed and sat beside the hospital bed.

"Look here, son-"

"Don't call me that," Hidan's eyes were dilated with adrenaline. The officer leaned forward with a furrowed brow.

"What's your name?"

"Hidan."

"Can you tell us what happened?"

Hidan looked around the small room like a mouse caught in a trap, "Where am I? I have to go home! Everyone is waiting for me!" Hidan tore the various tubes from his arms, trying to get up from the bed.

"Hold on now, son-" the officer tried to restrain Hidan back to the bed, but he gave him a bloody nose and swift kick to the gut. That was all he remembered of the hospital that night. He guessed they drugged him because when he came to he saw Konan, a childhood friend he hadn't seen for years, and then was dragged off to a room where he was asked more questions.

For six months he stayed with Konan and her boyfriend, Pein, who didn't ask many questions, although he made it obvious that he wanted Hidan out. Just before tensions started to become too much, Hidan got a call from a news broadcasting channel and was persuaded to do a live interview. Konan advised him to just forget the whole thing, move on, start a new life, but Pein suggested Hidan use the money to move out so, in a desperate attempt to do something other than sleep the days away, Hidan accepted the offer.

But something went wrong during the live interview, and Hidan snapped.

"Hidan," The young reporter addressed him in a serious tone, "What do you remember from the commune?"

"It's not a commune," Hidan spat at her, "It's a church. A church I belong to. Not that anyone fucking understands." For some reason small memories of his past were starting to flood his mind and it gave him a headache. The only thing he could focus on right now was a shiny red pen stuck behind the reporter's ear.

The woman crossed one leg over the other, and shot a look that meant to say, "It's rude to curse on live television", but continued on instead with, "Hidan, we all understand how horrible it must be to live through something like this."

Hidan held his throbbing head in his hands and moaned. The reporter motioned towards Hidan with a compassionate look.

"You are not alone, Hidan. You may not know, but the nation is trying to find the person who did this, and why."

Hidan felt laughter bubble up from his stomach, but couldn't stop the noise from escaping his lips, "You... you're what?"

"Hidan? Are you alright? This must be... very hard for you." The reporter only hesitated for a second before returning to a steady tone, but Hidan's laughter sent the studio into an eerie stillness.

"You're all- looking- for-," Hidan was doubled over in laughter.

"Are you okay, Hidan?" The reporter was becoming uneasy and unsure of what to do or say. Hidan's shoulders shook with laughter, and as it subsided he took a few steadying breaths.

"You're looking for the one who killed the members of the church of Jashin?"

"The church of... Jashin?" No one in the studio, let alone the millions watching the interview, were aware of this new information Hidan was giving.

"Yes! The church of Jashin!" Hidan's smile bordered on psycho as bits and pieces of memories started to plaster over some of the holes in his brain.

"What… Is it?"

Somehow, against all physics, Hidan's smile grew even larger.

"It's my home. A home to everyone really. No one was ever turned away. In fact, The Church of Jashin never discriminated against any race, gender, or sexuality!"

The reporter tensed a bit and said, "That sounds... nice."

"It sounds like paradise," Hidan corrected. "And we promise paradise to all of our people as well," Hidan stood up with hands clasped in prayer above his head. "Jashin saves all people through the one thing that unites us all."

"And, what- what is that?" The entire room tensed in horror at his response.

"Death."

"Death? Wha- What is it some kind of cult?" the reporter chewed her inner cheek so hard it bled. Hidan's unfocused demeanor at the beginning of the interview was replaced with one of psychotic intensity. He whipped his gaze towards the reporter and lunged at her, trapping the her between himself and the chair. She shrieked in horror.

"You're an idiot! You're all fucking idiots! I was chosen by the one and only god, Jashin himself, to guide my people towards paradise!"

The young woman was crying in the chair screaming for someone to help her. The camera woman ran on set to push Hidan off of the chair, but before she could try Hidan screamed at her and in panic she fell to the ground, terrified.

Hidan turned back to the reporter with a grin, " No one was murdered at the church of Jashin! They were saved! By me!"

The woman's face twisted in terror as she put his words together, How- How could you?!"

Hidan looked at her in a moment of mock offense, "I was chosen. My only wish is that I went with them," he turned his gaze to the camera and smiled, "But for all I know I could be immortal!" Hidan laughed, grabbed the red pen from behind the reporter's ear and stabbed himself in the neck. Blood dripped down his shirt and before he passed out he felt a bit spray onto his lips. It tasted… divine.

The pounding of the judge's gavel jolted him from his daze and he saw the jury come back to sit in their places. A man from the group stood up, "The jury has reached a decision."

The entire room dropped into silence.

"We find the defendant… not guilty by ruling of insanity.

"What?" Hidan said loudly and stood from his seat, "You people think I'm fucking crazy? I'm not crazy you stupid fucks!"

The chatter and chaos in the room erupted and two police officers jumped up to restrain Hidan.

"Get away from me!" He said, "Konan, I said I wanted to die! Konan! Listen to me!" The woman in question ignored the pleading and started to make a path through the room of rushing people. Hidan broke free from the cop's hold and leaped over the small divider, which only intensified the pandemonium in the room.

He grabbed Konan by the arm and spun her around, "I said I wanted to die! What the fuck is going to happen to me?"

"Hidan I'm sorry. I did what I thought was right. I'm sorry Hidan I-"

"You think I'm a fucking lunatic? Is that what you think? Fuck you! Fuck all of you!" Hidan screamed as the cops dragged him into the back room. The officers chained him to a metal table and slammed the door shut. Hidan continued to curse and scream until exhaustion took over, as it always did when he got into one of his freinzies, and he collapsed onto the floor. Slowly he gave up his fuming and slept.

"Hidan. Hidan. It's me, Deidara, wake up hmm? " The blonde nudged Hidan on the shoulder. Over the past year Deidara traveled as an assistant to the infamous doctor and psychologist, Sasori Akasuna, studying Hidan's mental health and psychoanalyzing him. Hidan, although he found no interest in Sasori, actually bonded with Deidara and the two became rather close acquaintances.

"What's going on?" Hidan slurred. He could feel he was in a vehicle and strapped to a board of some kind, but when he tried to stretch his arms he found his wrists restrained. "What the fuck is going on!"

"Hidan! Look at me!" Deidara said.

"The fuck are you doing here? The fuck are we going?"

"Hidan! Think about what happened! You know what's going on. You need to calm down, man. Take some deep breaths. Don't start freaking out again. I already had to sedate you once. Not that I mind stabbing you with a needle. You should be going to get euthanized like a dog after killing all those people hmm."

"That's right, the verdict…" Hidan said, "I wanted to die but those bastards think I'm fucking mental!"

"No shit, Hidan. If it were up to me I would've just strapped a bomb to your face and blew you to pieces, but that's not the case is it hmm?"

"God, you're annoying. Undo these stupid straps would you? I gotta take a piss."

"Hidan… listen to me. Dr. Akasuna and I have worked with Konan for the past year to get you off death row, because… because she knew you before all the cult shit and before your life got fuck up."

"Ha! I fucking knew it, you piece of shit! I knew it was you and Doc-tor Aka-su-na," Hidan mocked, "and I thought the two of you were on a first name basis after you sucked his cock and all!

"Hidan you don't fucking listen!"

"Tell me where we're going, Deidara!"

"Where the hell do you think, dumbfuck! You were deemed legally insane! You're being institutionalized!"

"What? Like a looney bin! What are they gonna do? Drug me up and put me in the corner to drool and piss on myself? God, I gotta get the hell outta here. Deidara you gotta help me."

"I'm trying but you keep talking. Look," Deidara held up a syringe, "Inject yourself with this, and you'll be dead in two minutes flat, and you can stop bothering my life."

Hidan looked at the yellow fluid filled medical instrument, "Deidara I can't kill myself. Suicide is a sin, and not just any sin but a big sin. You have to do it for me."

"Fine."

"Oh no you will not, Deidara," A stern voice sounded from the front of the vehicle and a red head appeared behind the caged partition.

"Oh god, you're here too. Fantastic," Hidan said at the sight of Sasori.

"Hidan we're bringing you to the Amakagure Institute. When we get there they will give you clothes, a room, medicine, and anything else you could need. You will also be seeing a new psychiatrist and doctor.

"Suck a dick, Sasori," Hidan said.

"We will be there soon, and Deidara if he's dead by the time this truck stops at the institute I'll leave you in his place," Sasori slammed the partition closed again.

"So I guess head really doesn't get you on a first name basis?" Hidan said.

"I hope you rot in the institute," Deidara replied.

The two waited in silence until the truck came to a stop. Two nurses dressed in white opened the back doors and undid the restraints on Hidan. Hidan held out his hands to be cuffed, although he hated being restrained it had been protocol for more than two years, and they led him into the grey double doors of the Amekagure Institute with Sasori and Deidara following not far behind.

Hidan looked at the white walls of the institution as he was led through the large hallways. 'I'm going to end up back in prison if I have to stay in this place for more than a month.' Hidan thought.

Their first stop was behind a glass door where a large man entered alongside another nurse and told him to strip naked. They lifted his arms up and the man patted him down.

"Turn around and squat," the man said. Hidan did as he was told. Scowling the entire time and while maintaining as much eye contact with the guard as possible.

"Change into these," the man said holding out a pocketless gray smock, matching pants, and socks.

"What about shoes?" Hidan said.

"Residents are only allowed shoes when outside."

"Well that's stupid…" Hidan muttered.

After he was changed the woman took the group for a short tour. They stopped in a medium sized room with a beat up blue couch and matching loveseat. The room also had a small television, book shelves filled with tattered old books, a coffee table with magazines on it, and two windows. Of course Hidan noticed the windows were barred and the room was the same sickening white as the rest of the halls.

"This is the common room," the nurse said, "You can come here to play board games, watch movies, chat with other residents, and just have a grand good time!"

"I'd rather die," Hidan deadpanned.

They walked a bit more to a large cafeteria filled with patients.

"And this is our Mess Hall! All of your meals will be eaten in here unless otherwise notified."

"It smells like shit in here," Hidan said. He watched as a patient sat down at the table in front of him and shove mashed potatoes down their pants. Hidan turned with a murderous look aimed at Sasori who starred with the same intensity right back.

"Fuck you, Sasori," Hidan said.

The room started to erupt with manic chatter, "Yeah fuck you! Ha! Fuck!" The noise started to get louder with cries, screams of profanities, and laughing. The nurse quickly ushered the group out and offered a half-apology.

"They are just so riled up and excited to have a new resident that's all! Let me show you to your room, and you can have a nice and well deserved rest."

As the group walked away a patient ran out of the cafeteria half naked and jumped on Hidan, "Murderer! Murderer! Mommy's got a Murderer!"

"Get off of me, you crazy bitch!" Hidan yelled as he tried to throw her off his back.

A guard sprinted out of the cafeteria, grabbed the woman, dragged her enraged form into the nearest room, and slammed the door shut.

"Oh, that's just Karin. She gets so excited for new residents," the nurse said.

"She tried to bite my fucking ear off!"

As they walked further down the halls Hidan wondered how he would survive in this asylum. This place was a maze. He'd never remember how to get around. They finally arrived at a yellow colored hallway, which somehow bothered Hidan more than the white ones, lined with simple wood doors. The nurse grabbed a key off the wall and walked to a room marked "21B." She jiggled the key around, opened the door, and motioned the party of three inside.

"And this is your new room," The nurse said, "Doors must remain unlocked during daytime hours, and locked during nighttime hours." The vomit colored room was nothing more than a small bed with a pillow and sheets, a metal bedpan, and a small barred window that brought in the fading daylight.

"What the fuck," Hidan said, "Fuck this shit. I'm not staying here."

"You will learn to love it I'm sure!" The nurse said.

Hidan turned to the nurse and moved close until their faces were almost touching, "I hate this place, I hate the people who forced me here, and I fucking hate the color yellow. But you know what I hate most of all? Hmm? What I hate the most are people who smile all the time and pretend everything is so exciting and great," he said mockingly, "even when they would rather choke on their own shit."

The nurse stuttered a quick, "A guard will come by to unlock your handcuffs," and left the three to say their goodbyes.

"We will no longer be seeing you as a patient, Hidan," Sasori said.

"Fuck you."

"I'm leaving you in the hands of one of my colleges, Dr. Kakuzu Taki. He is an esteemed psychologist and his medical expertise is astounding. Enjoy your new life at the institute. I don't think you'll ever come out, but, it's better than a life sentence in prison, and, although you think differently, it's better than death," and with that said Sasori saw himself out.

"I'll come visit you, hmm?" Deidara said.

"I hate you."

The blonde shrugged apologetically and followed Sasori down the hall.

Hidan sat on the bed and stared at his still cuffed hands. "There has to be someone in this shithole who would just slit my throat for me without thinking," he thought. Hidan laid down on the hard mattress. Although he'd apparently been restrained to a board all day, he was still exhausted. A guard came in to uncuff him, and when the man left Hidan heard him lock the door behind him. He stared at the vomit colored wall until he could no longer keep his eyes open, and fell asleep.

Hidan woke up to a loud banging on his door and a click that signaled the door unlocking.

"Report to the Mess Hall for daytime medicine and breakfast."

"Fantastic," Hidan threw the pillow over his face, "up at the crack of fucking dawn." Hidan saw only a faded gray light through his window and guessed it was a rainy morning. He stretched in his bed and felt his bones crack. He looked at the bedpan with disgust but took a piss in it anyway noting that the smell permeating the surrounding hall was indeed piss and shit from the "residents." He peeked suspiciously out from his door. The hallway was starting to fill with passing patients. There was a melancholy man with long black hair tied neatly into a low ponytail and crease lines under his eyes that made him look tired, a purple haired woman with a snake tattooed on the side of her face, and the crazy redhead girl from yesterday.

"I made it through two years in prison so I can make it through this," Hidan thought.

He stepped out into the hallway and tried to keep his head down while following the others to the mess hall. He wasn't here to make friends nor did he want to. He's supposed to be dead, or at least be in line for it.

"Hey there. You're new here. Ain't cha?" The voice was annoying and loud, and when Hidan didn't answer he received a little poke in the shoulder.

Hidan grabbed the man by the collar of his smock, "You better leave me the fuck alone."

"Oh ho ho! You really are the Jashinist cult killer!" The man looked like he'd been run over by a bus on one side of his face. "They call me Tobi around here, and I know who you are… Hidan. How about we sit together at breakfast?"

"How about I bash your face against the wall so you never talk again?"

"And then you'll get put away in solitary! If you like the room you're staying in I'm sure you'll love where they'll stick you if you make a mess on your first day."

"Fuck you. Don't talk to me. Ever." Hidan dropped Tobi's shirt and continued on.

When Hidan got to the mess hall he was practically dragged inside by a guard in a white uniform and forced to swallow a small cup of pills. He was pulled into the breakfast line by the same guard and given a tray with a bowl and spoon. As he moved, or was rather pushed, along the line by the other patients, a scoop of what he thought looked like oatmeal was slopped in his bowl. 'This was it? This was his breakfast?' he thought. Even prison had better food. He pushed violently back into the line.

"Hey! What the hell? Do I get a fucking drink or something?"

The lady behind the counter had sharp eyes with large bags underneath. Her hair was thinning and it almost looked like her lower lip could fall off at any moment. She ignored him, but Hidan persisted.

"Hey lady. I'm fucking thirsty. You want me to die of thirst?"

The woman grabbed a cup, spit in it, and handed it to him.

That was it. Hidan was ready to storm the kitchen and beat this old bitch to a pulp when he felt an equally as annoying poke on his shoulder.

"You have to ask nicely, Hidan," the way Tobi said his name was drawn out and his voice lingered on the vowels.

"Didn't I tell you never to speak to me again?"

"Hey, Tia can I have a cup of water for my friend here, pretty please. He's new. Super crazy. Killed a whole gaggle of goose in one night. Said it was God's work." The lady behind the counter handed Tobi a full glass of water. "Thank you, beautiful. See not so hard is it, Hidan?"

Hidan grabbed the glass and sat in a wobbly chair at the most deserted table he could find. It was hard to isolate yourself because all of the tables were circular with the chairs crammed together in order to fit many people. Tobi plopped down beside him.

"I'll teach you all the ins and outs of this place! See that guard over there?" Tobi pointed to a tall and muscular blue haired man in white giving out medicine to patients, "That's Kisame. He's a sweetheart. Nicest guy you'll ever meet. I once saw him knock out three residents having a fist fight. Also over there," Tobi pointed to the raven haired man Hidan saw in the hallway before, "That's Itachi Uchiha. He's here for the same reason you are; he killed a buncha' people. His whole family actually. I should know I was there watching. And over there-"

"I'm done. What do we do when we're done," Hidan said.

"Done with what? Oh, done with breakfast, doi! You have to wait until we're dismissed. Then we can go back to our rooms, or maybe watch some T.V., or-"

"Thanks for the water. Don't follow me." Hidan got up from his seat, and while another patient was having a distracting hissy fit about not being about to sit on the floor, snuck out the mess hall doors. Hidan wandered around for awhile until he found the common room, which was empty of course because everyone was still hoarded into the disgusting cafeteria. He skimmed through the magazines on the table. They were all outdated from years ago. He decided to try the books. Hidan hadn't read a book in years, not counting scriptures or verses from the Jashinist bible, and he brushed his hand against the spines. To think people thought it was a cult! Ha! Jashin never asked for anything like a cult did! Jashin gave! He gave understanding of others through pain, and salvation through death! Hidan picked a book and looked at the cover, "In Cold Blood."

"What the hell?" Hidan said, and sat down with the book. The sun moved acrossed the room as time passed and still no one came into the old dusty room. He decided he'd take the book back to his room to read. It was good enough to pass the time until he figured out a plan to get one of the crazies to shoot him in the head. 'Tobi would be easy enough to coerce,' he thought, 'or maybe, what was his name, the guy who killed his family…

"Don't take my books out of the common room."

"Excuse me?" Hidan turned to see a dark skinned man with long brown hair pulled together in a knot, but what struck him the most was the guy's face. It was scared into a glasgow smile and his green eyes looked completely bloodshot.

"What the hell happened to you?" Hidan laughed, "You look like you just crawled out of mother fucking Halloween town. You know they have surgery to fix all of…" Hidan motioned around the other man's face with his hands, "this."

"You talk a lot. Do you know that?"

"And you're ugly. Do you know that? You could scare kids with that face."

"Why don't we have a chat, Hidan? You're not supposed to be out and about right now, but let's just blame it on the fact that you're new here and don't know how things work."

Hidan wasn't surprised the dude knew his name. It'd been in every piece of media for the last three years. The scarred man sat on the larger of the two couches and motioned for Hidan to sit on the smaller one.

"Sorry. I don't want to chat."

"I insist." There was a pause in the encounter. The demeanor of this man was calm, but not peaceful and happy, it was like the calm before a storm.

"You're not a crazy person are you? You don't look like one of them." Hidan could see the man wore a long sleeve fitted shirt and wool cardigan with comfortable looking slacks. He also wore shoes if the rest wasn't a huge give away that he wasn't a patient. His outfit was well put together and Hidan could see the hint of a muscular build underneath the layers. Hidan himself didn't skip out on workouts. He liked his body and was somewhat vain about his looks.

"You're right. Have a seat."

Hidan cautiously sat down, "Who the fuck are you anyway?"

"I'm Dr. Kakuzu Taki. I'm one of the psychologists in this institution."

"Oi! So you're the new doc. Great," Hidan said sarcastically, "Sasori told me all about you. You're his esteemed colleague. God he spoke about you like you two fucked or something."

"Hidan can I ask you a question?"

"Ask away, Doc," Hidan smirked.

"Do you like it here? I know it's your first day, but what was your first impression?"

"Honestly the place is a complete shithole. Worse than prison. The food tastes like mashed up maggots and the rooms smell like piss and shit. Not to mention the batshit crazies that just walk around the place. I hate it. Can't wait to leave."

"Hidan you're not leaving. You know that right? Do you understand that this is your home now?"

"My lawyer and that stupid doctor Sasori fucked me over. I wanted to die."

"Then why don't you just kill yourself?"

"It's against my religion. Suicide is a horrible horrible sin. I'd put it at the top of the list of sins actually."

"What else is a sin in your religion, Hidan?"

"Ha. I can already tell you're better than Sasori. His questions are boring as hell. I could fall asleep standing up with him talking. Let's see… another horrible sin is to not kill."

"Not kill? So letting people live is a sin?"

"Yes. Jashinism teaches that anything other than complete destruction of another is a crime against God. Hmmm… so why don't I kill everyone in this damned place than? Well, I'll tell ya, because according to the scriptures I can't. Not like I did with the others. There are certain rituals that must be performed."

Kakuzu lifted his eyebrows.

"You know what I take it back! You're worse than that shit Sasori. You're a pretentious petty shit I can tell. You think I'm crazy too? Are you diagnosing me a psycho because I killed all those people. I loved all those people. They raised me. They helped me grow and understand things I would have never come to understand on my own. Jashin asked me to kill them and they welcomed me to do so. What do you think, Doctor Kakuzu? Do you think I'm fucking mental or that I deserve to die?"

"I think that you talk too much. Also your shirt is inside out. You could get in trouble for that. I'll see you when we have our first session two weeks. It'll give you some time to get accoustumed to things," Kakuzu got up to leave, "And one more thing. Don't take my books from the common room or I'll kill you myself."

Hidan was stunned that this man seemed almost unfazed by the fact that he killed close to 80 people. Usually people seemed, at least, a bit nervous when they first met him. Pretentious bastard. Fuck him. Hidan stuffed the book down his pants to bring back to his room.

"I wish he would kill me," Hidan thought.