"Sad" was putting it mildly for Max.

After a week apart, Max was missing Chloe like crazy but still tried to put on a brave face for her family.

After two weeks apart, that veneer had utterly disintegrated and she no longer even pretended that something wasn't bothering her. She had become sullen, withdrawn and had completely lost the Christmas spirit. She felt guilty about how she was acting since she really was happy to be with her cousins, which made her even more withdrawn and even more sullen.

In short, Max was having a bad time. She even had thoughts of asking her parents if they could send her home early on a bus or something but knew they never would.

Besides...I wouldn't want to upset Chloe by being all weepy and depressed around her.

One night, after she had put her phone down following her usual nightly text exchange with Chloe, Max lay back and tears streamed from her eyes. The more she wiped them away, the more they came.

Is this what having a girlfriend is like? Is this what...love is like? How can one person make me so happy one second, then make me feel so miserable the next?

I'm so confused! I wish I could talk to someone..but who? I don't want to upset Chloe...and I can't tell my parents!

Max sat up, wiped her eyes and reached into her suitcase. She pulled out a photo of Chloe that she had hidden on the bottom, underneath her clothes. It was one they had taken together before she had gone.

Chloe and I made silly faces, but we were both really sad because I was about to leave.

She put her finger over her face, suddenly ashamed at the face she was making, and gazed longingly at Chloe. Max sniffled and wiped her nose with the back of her hand. She wondered what Chloe was doing right at that moment? She wondered what Chloe was thinking about? She wondered if Chloe missed her as much as she missed Chloe?

I wish I had a long distance plan on my phone. I know how excited she'd be if I called her right now. She'd laugh and call me a dork...then probably say something silly about my freckles.

Damn, I miss her voice so much! I miss her dumb jokes...her loud music...her goofy smile. I...I miss how she always makes me feel safe when I'm with her. I miss how she makes sure I'm never scared...or lonely.

Max buried her face in her pillow and began to cry again.

If I were brave like Chloe, I'd run away tonight! I'd...I'd hitchhike back to Arcadia Bay! If I were brave like Chloe, I totally would!

A hand on her shoulder startled her and she looked up to see someone kneeling over her.

"Maxine, are you okay?"

Max wiped her eyes and saw her cousin Candace beside her. Candace was eighteen, and it was her room that Max was staying in.

"Why are you crying?" Candace whispered, a worried expression visible on her face in the dim light, then repeated: "Are you okay?"

Max desperately wanted to tell her cousin why she was upset, but when she opened her mouth to try to put it into words, she found that she couldn't. So instead she simply shook her head and looked down at the picture of her and Chloe sadly.

Her cousin's eyes looked down at the picture too. "Is that you and your friend, Chloe?" Candace asked, moving closer to Max and smiling at her.

More than that...More than a friend.

Max nodded silently and clenched her jaw to try to stem the flow of tears.

Her cousin put her arm around Max. "Are you upset because you miss her?" She asked.

Max nodded. "I...wish I was with her...instead of here." She replied, her throat feeling dry.

Her cousin hugged her. "Well, I'm glad you're here, Maxine. I don't get to see you very often. But it's normal to miss your friend, right? You probably missed her just as much the last time you visited."

Maybe...if we were simply friends still.

Max sighed and shook her head.

Candace smiled at Max. "Maxine, I miss my friends all the time when I'm not around them!"

Max looked at the photo of her and Chloe again, her stomach doing somersaults.

Even with her eyes crossed and her tongue out, she's still...

"Candace…?" Max whispered, wrapping her blanket around herself.

so...

"Yes, Maxine?" Candace replied.

beautiful!

Max closed her eyes and pictured Chloe in her mind, hoping that might boost her courage.

Her blue eyes…

Her long, blonde hair…

Her smile…

Her lips...smelling like strawberry lip balm…kissing her.

"Can you...keep a secret?" Max whispered.

She opened her eyes to see her cousin was looking at her with curiosity and concern. "Does this secret have to do with why you were crying, and why you've seemed so sad this week?" Candace replied, just as quietly as Max.

Max felt new tears forming. She wiped her wrist over her face, but her nose had begun to run again. Her cousin frowned and grabbed a tissue box from the bedside table, handing it to Max. Max gave her a small smile in thanks and blew her nose, then nodded.

Candace smiled back at Max and rubbed her arm affectionately. "People have been wondering why you've been acting so down, Maxine, because they care about you. But...if it's important to you that it's a secret, I promise I won't tell anybody."

Max wiped her eyes with another Kleenex. "Well…" she began with a sniffle. "It's...about Chloe."

Her cousin nodded. "Okay?"

Max felt her cheeks burning and nervously played with the ball of used tissue in her hand. "It's about Chloe...and me."

"Okay?" Candace repeated. "What about you and Chloe?"

Max took a deep breath and let it out slowly and shakily. "Chloe and me…" She began before trailing off and shaking her head in disappointment at herself.

Be brave, Max! Be brave like Chloe!

She looked at her cousin and willed herself to meet her eyes. Tears flowed slowly down Max's cheeks, but she didn't wipe them away this time. "Chloe and me...are girlfriends." She whispered. "I love Chloe more than a friend."

The relief of finally putting her feelings into spoken words for the first time, combined with the release of finally sharing it with someone else, magnified Max's feelings of longing for Chloe and she broke down into tearful sobs. Her cousin put her arms around her and rubbed her back gently.

"I miss her Candace! I miss her so much!" Max croaked.

"I don't doubt it for a second." her cousin said with a sad smile.

"Do you...think it's weird?" Max sniffled, wiping her face with a handful of tissue. "I mean...is it okay that I'm...you know...a lesbo and stuff?"

Candace ruffled Max's hair. "Whether you are a lesbian or not doesn't affect who a person is, Maxine."

Max frowned. "But...like...I'm worried that mom and dad won't let me see Chloe anymore if they know that we're...you know...dating now?"

"Well…" Candace replied thoughtfully, "I maybe wouldn't mention the D-word around them. My parents didn't let me start serious dating until I was a senior."

Max shrugged, "I'm almost 14."

Candace smiled, "Well, in any case, just keep that part quiet for a while, maybe." She said, then added, "Well...this definitely explains why you've been so down. Love is strange, and it makes us feel strange things sometimes."

Max nodded. "I feel like my body is full of butterflies when I think about her. Right before I went away we decided to be...you know. And now...I'm here and...I...I miss her so much, it hurts my insides."

"Well, you're going back in a couple of weeks, right?"

"It's going to feel like a couple of years, I know it!" Max said, crossing her arms and rolling her eyes. "Maybe if I could talk to her I'd feel better, but I can't call her because I don't have long distance on my phone!"

Candace yawned and walked back to her bed. "Tell you what, Maxine?" She said sleepily. "Why don't we hit the hay for now, and tomorrow night when everyone else goes to bed, I'll let you use my phone to call her?"

Max's eyes lit up, "Really? That would be so awesome! You're the best!"

"Yep, I'm a regular angel of mercy. Now, how about you get some sleep, Maxine?" Candace said with another yawn.

"Oh, okay. But...um... Candace?"

"Mmm?"

"Do you still promise you'll keep...you know...what I told you a secret?" Max whispered.

"Cross my heart. Now sleep!" Candace replied, throwing a pillow at Max.

The following day Max was in a much better mood. Her mother even mentioned to her that she was glad to see Max smiling again. Max simply replied that she was trying to be more positive, but of course, the truth was the knowledge that she'd get to hear Chloe's voice for the first time in more than two weeks.

It made her feel even better when she got her phone that evening and found a text from Chloe waiting for her:

Chloe: Hey Max. Your parents probably have your phone still. Not sure if they check your messages. Just sitting in my room and really missing you right now. Can't think straight since you've been gone. Hope you're at least having a good time with your fam. Do you think we can talk on the phone tonight? Even for a couple of minutes? I really miss hearing your voice. I feel lost without you.

Max texted back:

hey u! havesome amazeballs news! my cousin is letting me use her phone to call u 4 a few mins! I hope ur around nao.

She was startled by a notification mere seconds later:

Chloe: Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh!!1 That is totally I mean I can't even say how happy I am to get to hear your voice! I've been so miserable without you, Max!

Max smiled and took a deep breath.

Hold it together, Max! You don't want to upset her by being all needy and stuff! Just play it cool!

Who am I kidding? I wouldn't know what "cool" was if it punched me in the face!

She picked up her cousin's phone and stared at it worriedly.

"Do you want me to...umm...leave for a bit?"

Max turned around and bit her bottom lip for a moment, then tried to smile. "Well...it's your room, so…"

Candace nodded with a smirk, "I'll just...I'll go. Yeah." She said as she sidling over to the door.

Meanwhile, Max looked down at the phone with Chloe's number punched into the display. She took another deep breath.

You can do this, Max!

She hit the send button, then squeezed her eyes closed tightly.

Maybe she won't answer

RING...

What if she doesn't really want to talk to me after all?

RING...

What if…

"Max?"

Max swallowed hard and tried sniffle back her tears. "H...hey, Chlo! It's...yeah, it's me."

"Shit, hold on! Let me...lemme close the...okay...hello? still there? Hey, Max! It's...good to hear your voice. It feels like…wow...like..."

"Forever?" Max finished for her.

"Yeah...it feels...I mean...I keep thinking that, like...gosh...wow, I sound like a total, babbling dork, huh?"

Max wiped her eyes and laughed. "Yeah. You really do. But that's...I've...really missed that. Like…a lot." She paused, then added. "I've missed you a lot too. I...miss you, Chloe."

There was a pause and Max heard Chloe sniffle. "I miss you too! I miss you so much, Max. Like...a retarded amount, I miss you! It's...it's been…oh my gosh, why the fuck is this so hard, Max? You've gone away to summer camp! Dad took me on a road trip to the Grand Canyon that summer when I was in grade 4! We've been apart before and it's never been like this!"

Max nodded. "I know. I just feel...I don't know what I feel. Something feels...like it's missing inside of me."

There was a pause. "I know. I'm totally missing you inside me," Chloe replied with a sniffle.

Max opened her eyes wide. "Jeez, Chloe!"

Chloe laugh-coughed. "No, no, you weirdo! I mean...like...you not being in Arcadia Bay is making me feel...empty. Not like before when I missed you. Now it feels like...I dunno...it feels like...maybe..."

"Maybe what?" Max replied.

"It feels like...maybe you aren't going to come back? It feels like...what if you were meant to move away after dad died, but you didn't? And now...maybe…"

"That's crazy! I'm totally coming back!" Max responded louder than she intended to; as though she was saying it to herself as well.

"In less than two weeks, I'm coming back, Chloe, and we'll see each other again! We'll be...we'll be together again!"

She heard Chloe sniffling through the phone, then the hiccups of her restrained sobs. "But…" Chloe rasped after a few moments, so quietly that Max had to strain to hear her. "But...what...what if you don't, Max? I just keep worrying, like...what if you don't? I didn't...I don't think I can deal without…Gah, I'm sorry, Max! I'm being so fucking crazy right now! I probably sound like a lunatic!"

Max wiped her eyes with her sheets. "Chloe Price, listen to me! I don't care if I have to run away and live in your basement! I'm never, never, ever leaving you!"

There was a pause, then, "But...Max?"

"Yeah, Chloe?" She replied.

"I don't have a basement," Chloe said.

Max cast a quick glance at the bedroom door as she heard a soft knock, then turned back and lowered her voice until she was whispering. "Umm...Chloe? Gosh...I...I have to go now, Chloe! I'll see you soon!"

She heard Chloe sigh. "Oh really? I...I understand I guess." then quickly yelled, "Wait!" before lowering her voice again, "Um...Max?

"Yeah? Yeah, Chlo?"

There was a pause, and Max was starting to wonder if she had disconnected.

"Max...I...um...I love you, Max, okay? And... and I'm glad I'm your girlfriend! I just...I just wanted you...to know, okay?"

Max smiled. "I'm glad too, Chlo. Super glad! And...um...I love you too. I...yeah, I love you. So, so much. Umm...bye."

Max disconnected the call and put the phone beside her on the bed. She stared down at her feet and took a deep breath.

"You can come in now," Max said to the door.

Slowly, the door opened and Max's cousin stuck her head in. "Is everything okay, Maxine? How did...everything go with...you know?"

Max wiped her face with the back of her wrist. "It...went good, I guess. The next few days are going to be super hard, but I'm glad Chloe and I could talk tonight. It really helped me feel better."

"I'm glad too, sweetie," Candace said, putting her hand on Max's shoulder. "So, are you ready for bed now?"

"Yeah, I guess," Max said, laying back on her bed and pulling the sheets up over her. "Candace?" Max asked.

Her cousin turned from getting into bed, "Yeah?"

Max stared down at her sheets and played with the material between her fingers. "You...haven't heard anything about mom or dad talking about...you know...staying here, or...um...not moving back to Arcadia Bay, have you?"

Candace gave Max a confused look. "No...no, I haven't. Did they say to you that you weren't going back?"

"No. I mean, I don't think so." Max replied. "But, to be honest, I haven't really been paying attention to much lately."

"I see," Candace said. "Maxine, what would make you think they wouldn't be going back?"

Max told her about her father's job offer in Seattle, and how they were all set to move away until Chloe's father was killed. "They said they were staying because of what happened to Chloe's father, but it's been a while since it happened and...I guess I'm just scared they might decide to move after all."

Candace listened and nodded as Max talked to her. When Max finished, Candace got off the bed and sat on the floor beside Max. "Maxine, have you ever...you know...told your parents how you feel?"

"You mean, about me and Chloe? You know I haven't!" Max exclaimed.

Candace shook her head, "No, not about that...although it might not be a bad idea to tell them pretty soon now that I know more about what's going on. I mean, have you told them that you don't want them to consider moving away again?"

Max sullenly shrugged, then shook her head. "When we were supposed to move to Seattle, I told dad that I didn't want to move...and how I didn't want to leave my house and my school...and I didn't want to leave Chloe behind. He...just said that change was good and that I'd like the big city, and all the art and music, and how we'd go to Seahawks and Mariners games together. He said that I'd make new friends, and this was just the next stage in my life. The...day that we were supposed to leave was the day of Chloe's dad's funeral."

Candace frowned, "I see. That...really sucks what happened to your...to Chloe."

Max nodded, "Yeah. I prayed to God that I didn't have to leave and for dad to change his mind. I thought...maybe this was His answer? Like how we learned in Sunday School that the Hebrews weren't allowed to leave Egypt, so God killed all the Egyptian children to make Pharoah let them go. If that's true, then God is a real asshole."

Candace laughed, "I...don't think any of those things actually happened."

"Neither do I." Max said softly, then added, "He just...didn't understand, I guess. He said I'd make lots of new friends, and it'd be good not to just be around the same one all the time. I...I don't think my parents like Chloe very much. She was always getting me into trouble, and I got hurt real bad a couple of times when we played together. But she's smart so...she helped me with math and science and stuff and they liked that. Anyway, we used to play together every day when we were little...less often when we got older, but we still used to hang out at school and most weekends. She said most people were fake losers and barbies, but that I was the only real person she knew. She said I was cool...even though I don't think I'm cool. Everybody used to make fun of my freckles, but she said they were neat...that I was neat. Chloe's so tall and smart, she's so outgoing and confident, she's so..." Max averted her eyes. "...so pretty. She could have tons of friends if she wanted to...she could probably have a boyfriend if she wanted to. She could be anything she wanted to be...she could do anything she wanted to do. Chloe is...amazing. I don't know why she wants to hang out with me...or be with me in...um...the gay way."

Candace listened to Max and smiled. "You know something? I love you because you're my cousin, but your shyness and putting yourself down all the time makes want to punch you. You're a great person, Maxine...you're honest and kind, and I've seen all the amazing pictures you take with your camera. You're an amazing and talented young woman. I also see how much you open up when you're talking about Chloe. Your eyes get a different look to them, and you show real emotion. Even if you didn't tell me, it's easy to see that you really do love her, don't you?"

Max nodded without hesitation. "I've always loved Chloe. I will always love her."

Candace nodded back. "And you'd do anything for her, wouldn't you?"

Max smiled. "Anything," she repeated.

Candace pat her shoulder, "Then I'm going to dare you to do something that might be a bit difficult for you, but if you love Chloe and would do anything for her, then you'll do it."

Max creased her brow in interest and concern, "What...what's that?"

Candace smiled, "If not tomorrow, then sometime within the next week, I want you to sit down with your parents and tell them that you 100% don't want to leave Arcadia Bay anytime soon. That you want to stay in that town, at that school, and not move. For double points, I also dare you to tell them how you feel about Chloe." She sat back and crossed her arms with a satisfied grin.

Max's expression changed from confusion to horror, to apprehension. "Tell...tell them that…? um...but you said…"

"I said you are an honest, and amazing young woman, Maxine. And that means you can have the confidence to tell your parents how you feel. You can have the confidence to tell your parents what you really want. They may not even be planning to move away again...or maybe they are? They may listen to you and consider your opinion...or maybe it won't make any difference! But I'm willing to bet that Chloe isn't the only one of you two that can be confident and outgoing when you want something enough. What do you want, Maxine?"

Max looked her cousin in the eyes and as confidently as she could, she said. "I want Chloe."