I was unabashedly scrolling through The Apocryphal One (who I'll go ahead and shout-out as I love her content and she has recommended my fics on more than one occasion and I'd be an ass if I didn't do the same, please give her a look-see, if it's Fire Emblem or Dangitt Ronpies-related, she has it on lockdown)'s tumblr blog a few weeks ago when she answered a question from AquosEvolved, who I don't know quite as well but whose content I also enjoy, you can find them on AO3. The gist of it was a prompt for the drabble that follows, and Apocryphal requesting for someone else to expand upon it as she hadn't the time to do so herself. Not that anybody was dying to read my hot take on the prompt, but I stepped in to pick up the slack anyway.

So, really, this a request for person A based on a headcanon sent in by a completely different person B that was ultimately carried out by person C who liked the prompt enough to pick it up and complete it. Caught up yet? Good, let's continue.

Word count: 1,204 words.

Song listened to while writing (for context): Animal Crossing (GC) - 7 A.M.

Number of times Corrin says 'baby': 15.

Hostage Situation

"Milady," Kaze dips his head, calm and composed. "You've come."

"As you've requested," Azura smiles, though her mask falters at the sight of the rest of her retainers. "Has.. something happened?"

"Emergency! EMERGENCY!" Felicia cries, nearly stumbling as she pushes the formal ninja aside. "I-It's an emergency, milady! I-It's terrible! It's awful! It's—!"

"A minor inconvenience," says Jakob with a sigh as he dismissively withdraws his fist from Felicia's head. "Hardly a crisis, if you ask me."

"M-Maybe we just see things differently then.." the maid mumbles as she rubs her head.

"A draconian abomination attempted to destroy us all by waging literal unspeakable bloodshed. I think my perceptions on what constitutes as an 'emergency' have been somewhat affected as a result, yes."

Taking away what little she can from the exchange, the queen interjects. "Ah, so we're not under attack?"

"That would depend on your definition of an attack, milady," the bitter butler answers. "According to your right-hand maid, this is a crisis that could undermine our kingdom and send us to all to oblivion."

"Jakob, please," Kaze raises a hand. "Let us not confuse her. This is indeed a situation that must be attended to, but I would be hesitant to call it a dire one."

"If you could just tell me—" Azura tries to speak, only to be drowned out by bickering. Fitting given her namesake but hardly a delight.

"What they're trying to say," Lilith begins as she squeezes herself in-between both men, excusing herself in the process. "Is that it is an issue, a simple one. One which we need you, milady, to resolve."

"I'm afraid I still don't understand," Azura says. "What specifically has transpired?"

"In short," Kaze crosses his arms. "Someone has locked themselves in the royal nursery."

The queen tilts her head quizzically. "Locked themselves in the..? Kaze, I'm more than happy to lend a hand should you need it, but I don't see how I could be of use here, or rather, the only use. Have you misplaced your master key?"

"Ah, you don't seem to understand," Jakob adds, gesturing to the room behind him. "The door is open, milady."

"It is?"

"Indeed. We wouldn't request you if the problem was the door alone. Well, Felicia might. If you want to discuss lost keys, she could certainly entertain you."

"J-Jakob!"

"Jakob."

Finding herself back at square one, Azura tries once more to play interrogator. "So, to be precise—no one is truly locked within the nursery, correct?"

Jakob nods. "Correct."

"Yet you claim someone has isolated themselves inside?"

Kaze nods. "That is correct, milady."

"And due to these circumstances, and possibly more that I have yet to figure out, I am the only person capable of resolving this affair."

Lilith nods. "Precisely."

"In that case," the queen begins with a hand over her chest. "May I ask why the four of you are all unable to approach the nursery?"

"Oh!" Felicia gasps, her hand raised. "I can answer that one! Simple—Lord Corrin told us not to!"

Azura blanks at the sudden mention of her husband. "I.. Excuse me?" she blinks. "Where did this come from? Corrin ordered you not to confront this person?"

Jakob turns to Kaze. "Goodness. Another misunderstanding."

"Yes," the ninja frowns. "I'm afraid this isn't turning out as smoothly as I hoped."

"I blame Felicia for escalating the situation."

"B-But I didn't do anything!"

The queen opens her mouth to speak once more, but Lilith beats her to the punch.

"We're beholden to brothe—Lord Corrin's will, milady, so if he humbly requests that we do not disturb him, then it's our duty to follow through."

And then it hits her—why Corrin, the king of Valla, would want his retainers to stay away from an open room supposedly holding a hostage that poses zero physical threat to anyone.

Azura exhales, more relieved than anything.

"I'll be just a moment," she says as she enters the nursery, leaving her friends to their own devices.

"And that's when we found out that the Faceless we were attacking were actually innocent members of the Wind Tribe, and gods, the comical misunderstandings that-soon-turned-violent-and-led-to-more-bloodshed-and-innocent-loss-of-life that ensued... Haha, if you had only seen the looks on their faces when we made it to their village, why, you probably wouldn't even be born! Isn't that weird to think about?"

"Blep."

Corrin sheepishly rubs the back of his neck and smiles wholeheartedly as he recounts his entire life story to a chubby little blueberry baby that has zero concept of everything and anything being told to him.

"Blep."

The baby fidgets a little, makes a noise (the only noise he makes), and falls on his side.

"Oh no," Corrin coos. "Baby fell down! Here, I'll sit you up again!"

The scene is about on par for Azura's expectations, believe it or not.

"Corrin?"

"Oh!" the king beams as he turns to his wife, unintentionally releasing the baby and letting him lean over again. "Hello Azura! Look! Shigure's sitting! He's sitti—oh, wait, no, baby fell down again."

"Corrin, your retainers are outside. They're concerned and wondering why you've chosen to lock yourself in here with a baby."

"Our baby," he clarifies (something he does often). "And the door isn't locked. Or is it? Did I lock it and forget?"

The queen shakes her head. "No, it wasn't locked, but you did tell them to stay away from you."

"Oh," Corrin blinks as he sits the baby up again. "Yeah, that. That's because they were intruding on baby time."

"Baby time?"

"Baby time—time I spend with the baby," he explains as if it's the simplest thing in the world. "Isn't that right, Shiggy Diggy? We were having baby time!"

"Blep."

"You know how busy I am," the king hums as he pokes the baby's belly. "King stuff, king stuff, day in and day out. It's important, I know. I'm not saying it isn't, I love our kingdom and what we've achieved, and I'll always be there for my people," he pauses, thinking over his words. "But I just don't like other people raising my baby. Our baby."

"Therefore, you decided to.." Azura begins, putting the pieces together.

"Create baby time and make it so no servants, maids, butlers, retainers, or whomever are allowed? Yup!" Corrin turns to the baby, who's fallen once more. "Say papa, baby! Say papa!"

"Blep."

"No, baby, that's not papa! Silly baby! Say papa! Say it! Say papa for papa!"

The baby purses his lips, as if trying to copy Corrin's words, but not quite.

". . . . . Blep."

Corrin sighs (so close, yet so far). "You want to help me out here? You're the mama, so you can stay. Baby won't mind."

Flustered by his forwardness but endeared to him nonetheless, Azura takes a seat beside him. "Oh!" she gasps. "Ah, I almost forgot, the others—"

"Oh, they'll be fine," Corrin claims, booping the baby's nose and scooting just a bit closer to his wife. "Besides, this won't take long. I'll have this itty-bitty little Shiggybean calling me papa in no time! Isn't that right, baby?"

Rather than answer his papa, the baby instead notices his mama, and nearly falls trying to reach her. His words as he tips over, are nevertheless, a milestone to behold.

"Mama!"

Happy birthday Azura, made it on time this year. Somehow. Prompt complete!

Read and review so I can make Corrin say 'baby' more.