Almost, but not quite

It was strange, how a maybe could feel like everything.

What Aoko liked the best about rain was when it happened at night. It made the weather a lot more cooling, and most importantly, it helped to kill the silence that echoed in her room when she tried to sleep. The pitter-patter of the rain continued to hit her closed glass windows, creating a rhythmic melody to hypnotise her to her dreamland.

But for the first time in a while, Aoko couldn't sleep.

The weather felt unusually colder than other rainy nights, until Aoko realized it was because the blanket she was using now was too thin and small to keep her warm. She turned and raised her head to look at the ground next to her bed.

"Kaito?"

He didn't answer.

It was Saturday, or technically it was two hours ago. Her clock on the wall showed two in the morning of a Sunday, and thinking about how she had to withstand the cold for at least a few more hours felt like an impossible task for her; the rain and howling wind didn't seem to be stopping anytime soon.

The original plan (if Aoko even considered it as a plan) was that they would finish their paired math assignments together after dinner. But halfway through it, they watched two spy movies and learnt how to make a dinosaur origami, courtesy of Kaito and his sudden interest to watch a youtube video about it.

And then just like that, evening suddenly turned to midnight. And Kaito, being too absurdly lazy to walk ten minutes back to his house, decided to sleep on Aoko's cold hard floor. Before she could retort that she didn't have any futon in her house to lend him, he was already unconscious and sprawled next to her bed, and no matter how much Aoko shook him, he wouldn't wake. She didn't have the strength to lift him up or even roll him out of her door, so having no choice, she tugged a spare pillow under his head and used her thick blanket to cover his body up. She slept on her own bed with an old blanket for the night, which she used when she was just a kid.

Aoko sighed and laid back on her bed. She wasn't sure what the point of calling Kaito up was for anyway. She couldn't be telling him that she was cold. What could he even do besides returning her blanket back? There was no way she was going to leave him shivering on the floor.

Shaking her head, she cowered into a ball under the small blanket and forced her eyes close to sleep.

It seemed like a minute or two had passed when Aoko felt one side of her bed sunk and the mattress began bouncing and moving. She flung her eyes open and turned, to find herself staring straight into something pointy. Something angular.

Something like a jaw.

Kaito's jaw.

Aoko blinked, and blinked again. She leaned back with a gasp, to get a bigger and fuller picture of what the hell she was really seeing.

It was Kaito, and he was on her bed.

"K-Kaito…?" She almost couldn't recognise her own voice, not when it sounded like a mouse squeaking instead.

But unlike her previous attempt, he heard it this time, for some weird reason. "Hmmmpphhh…?" He groaned, his brows furrowed and nearly merging. Slowly, very slowly, he opened his eyes, and Aoko thought her room turned a shade lighter than before.

They stared at each other for nearly an eternity. But in reality, the minute hand on her clock only ticked once.

He blinked, and blinked again; his lazy and tired features turned less groggy every time he did. By the third one, he was fully awake.

It was kinda unfair that Aoko was the only one blushing.

"You cold?" He spoke, his hoarse voice was the only evidence that he just woke up from his slumber.

She hoped he had mistakened her flushed cheeks for the cold too. "Y-Yeah."

Without a word, he tossed the blanket that he had brought up to her bed over her body and patted it down. Like some magic, Aoko felt a thousand times more warmer and comfortable than she could ever wish for.

"Better?" He asked.

Aoko nodded (She didn't want to speak if everything that left her mouth would become a stutter).

He nodded back before lifting himself off her bed. "Ok. I should go."

"W-Wait." Aoko cursed herself mentally before sitting up on her bed, the blanket dropping off her shoulders. Their legs would have touched if hers wasn't under her cover and his wasn't exposed.

"Hm?"

"It's raining." She finally said after making sure she wasn't going to stutter this time round.

Kaito turned towards the window and frowned. Even though it was getting a little bit harder to read him these past few months, it was safe to say that she could this time; he probably didn't realize it was raining until she told him.

Which was quite unbelievable, actually.

"Don't go." She continued when he gave no response.

He glanced over his shoulder and watched her in silence, as though he was waiting for her to retract back her words. It was also at the moment when it occured to her that she was currently sitting closely on the same bed in the dim darkness next to Kaito, the only guy that made her heart flutter in a second and stop at the next.

But she didn't correct herself, or say anymore. The lack of context in her words was making things more complicated than it should be, but she decided the ball was now in his court.

Aoko swore his eyes flickered to her lips before he looked away and stood up from her bed. "Nah," his cheery and slightly taunting tone he always used in school was back in place. "I should go."

She wasn't sure what to call that sinking feeling in her chest. Being upset didn't seem to fit her because she didn't have the rights to be. And heartbreak sounded too exaggerating. Maybe she would find that out one day, but not now.

"Alright." She mustered the same carefree tone she usually used in school too. "Do you need me to send you off?"

"If there's not going to be any red carpet, then there's no point for it." He grinned and waved her off. "I'll be fine. I just need an umbrella."

Aoko scoffed. "You know where it is."

"Yeah." His smile didn't waver. "I do."

Her faint smile did waver, though, once he left her room and closed the door behind him.

A few minutes later, she spotted him walking towards his house from her window. She wasn't sure if Kaito knew, but of all the umbrellas he had chose, he had picked her favourite one to use.

She laid back on her bed.

What Aoko liked the best about rain was when it happened at night. It made the weather a lot more cooling, and most importantly, it helped to kill the silence that echoed in her room when she tried to sleep. The pitter-patter of the rain continued to hit her closed glass windows, creating a rhythmic melody to hypnotise her to her dreamland.

But for the second time within the same hour, Aoko couldn't sleep.

It was strange how hearts could ache for something intangible. How you could cry for something that never happened. How an almost could be so painful. How a maybe felt like everything.

And that was exactly what happened that night.

.end.

me: "Hey I hope everyone miss me! Here's an update of a totally random plot for everyone!"
the FBI that is spying on me: She had spent two hours writing this, which could have been put to other good use, such as updating her on-going fic. smh
Me: "I hope everyone will like it!"
the FBI that is spying on me: And nobody likes it