Author's Note:

This nice long treat was written for Mierke for the Chocolate Box Exchange.
She requested a "TBBT" Soulmate AU...and she got one...sort of... ;)

The Soup and Soulmate Substantiation

Despite his best efforts to avoid human contact and sanitize everything both before and after he touched it, Sheldon caught the nasty bug that had swept across the university over the previous week. Originally, Penny (already full of disappointment and irritation from that morning's failed audition) refused when Sheldon called her from work to announce that he was sick and that he needed a ride home. However, after she realized that he did sound terrible, and that nobody else was willing to do it, she reluctantly agreed. Once she was there and recognized just how feverish he was, though, she felt guilty for ever doubting him in the first place. After all, she had grown quite fond of the quirky physicist over the years. Therefore, she took him home, put him to bed, applied vapor rub to his chest, and sang "Soft Kitty" for him. Afterwards, she brushed her fingers through his hair affectionately and told him to get some rest. She then left him to do just that - after promising to come back to check on him later.

As Sheldon snuggled down under his blanket, he could still feel his scalp tingle where she had touched it - and he liked it. Of course, it is probably just the vapor rub, he thought logically, but it did not really matter. He realized that he was just happy that Penny had remained a fixture in their lives, even after the inevitable happened when she and Leonard had not turned out to be quite the soulmates that his roommate had thought that they would be. Soulmates, Sheldon thought and then snorted softly in derision at such a primitive concept. Soon he fell asleep, however, and his brain continued this train of thought through his dreams.

Regardless of what others might have thought, Sheldon was not an asexual robot without romantic feelings. In fact, he desperately wanted to meet his soulmate – the one woman who was meant just for him. He knew that theoretically she existed out there somewhere. However, he had actually done the math and realized that the odds of her being anyone he knew…or would ever even meet…or would realize who she was even if they did meet…were astronomical. Therefore, since he was not willing to settle for less than perfection, he discouraged the attention of others as he draped the persona of wacky scientist around him like a protective cloak…and he continued on through life. He filled his days with work and spent his nights in the company of a few like-minded men whom he eventually considered to be friends. Occasionally someone new would come along - like the brash Nebraskan blonde who moved in across the hall and then inexplicably, into their lives. Other than that, however, his life was routine…and quite dull. All too soon, however, that routine was disturbed as he was forced to watch, and suffer in silence, as one-by-one his friends found their soulmates.

First, Leonard fell into the Leslie Winkle's web. Sheldon felt sure that the only thing that kept his nemesis from devouring his best friend alive after they mated, just like a Black Widow spider, were the matching musical quarter note marks on their right forearms that signaled their soul bond. Therefore, Sheldon tolerated the relationship between the other two physicists…even if it was with poorly concealed contempt.

Howard, against all odds, then found his mate in Penny's perky and buxom friend, Bernadette. Sheldon would have doubted the validity of this match, as well, if the proof had not also shown itself in the form of matching soul marks. For the two of them, it was the chemical formula for Sulfuric acid. When they excitedly showed the group their discovery after their first night together, Sheldon looked, and H₂SO₄ was indeed clearly visible directly under each of their left shoulder blades.

Sheldon then met Amy after Howard and Raj's ill-conceived plan to help Sheldon find his soulmate via the internet. To be honest, Sheldon wondered at first if she could indeed be the one meant for him - right up to the point where she told him that coitus was off of the table because she already had a soulmate. Apparently, it was the Saudi Arabian prince who funded her research. Then she tucked her hair behind her right ear to show him the small, but perfect, depiction of a cerebellum located there. Upon retrospection, Sheldon decided that he was a bit relieved at this outcome. Amy was too similar to the persona that he usually wore for them to be happy being more than just friends.

Raj took a little bit longer to find his soulmate. However, even he eventually met a Hello Kitty cosplayer at ComicCon with whom he shared a hotel room after spending the night together singing drunken karaoke. That adventure soon led to the reveal of the matching heart-shaped marks on their left hips…and the rest was history.

That left just Sheldon and Penny with unfulfilled soul bonds. The others liked to joke that maybe the two of them were meant to be together. However, that crazy idea just made Penny laugh and Sheldon scoff. Regardless, the two of them found that they were spending an increasing amount of time, which they both rather enjoyed, in each other's company – especially while the others were off with their mates. Even if Sheldon found himself thinking fond thoughts of his neighbor from time to time, though, he would never even consider the possibility that the pretty and vivacious woman could be the soulmate of someone like himself.

Therefore, life moved on…as routine and uneventful as always…until the night that Penny fell in the shower. Sheldon was the only one available to help, so he did what he could to assist his friend. However, when the hero peeked, he got the shock of a lifetime when he saw the mark on her right buttock. It looked exactly like the Chinese symbol for soup. He knew that because he had one that was identical to it and it was located in the exact same place as hers! It was an awkward moment for such a life-changing revelation, though, especially since Penny was wet, half-naked, and in pain. However, he still took her into his arms and kissed her gently. After her initial shock at such an action, Penny relaxed into the kiss first and then began to return it. She even moaned gently…and this time it was not because of the pain.

Suddenly, Sheldon woke with a jolt! The first thing that he noticed was that Penny was not there. His arms…and lips…were cold. It was all a dream, he realized and a wave of disappointment, tempered with just a tiny bit of relief, washed over him.

At least the relief was easy to understand. He was relieved because the fact that it was a dream meant that Leonard was not really with Leslie Winkle, aka Evil Incarnate. In fact, in real life, he and Amy had unexpectedly hit it off at her cousin's wedding and were now dating each other. Sheldon had been relieved at that development, as well, since Amy had obviously wanted more from their friendship than Sheldon had felt comfortable with providing at the time. Therefore, he was quite happy when his two friends turned to each other, instead. Even though they satisfied each other's physical and emotional needs, they were both still in his life…and that was what really mattered to him.

The feeling of disappointment upon awakening, however, was a little harder for him to understand. At any rate, he found that he was reluctant to examine the source of that feeling too closely…and just blamed it on the fever instead. After a moment, though, he realized that he no longer felt feverish and took his own temperature. Once the number showed only a slight increase over normal body temp, he decided to get out of bed for a little while. He also decided that he needed to walk a little bit in order to stretch out his muscles after being asleep for most of the day. Therefore, before he even realized it, he found himself out in the hallway and facing the door to Apartment 4B.

He raised his hand, and hesitated for just a moment before he executed his customary knocking sequence.

Knock, knock, knock, "Penny!"
Knock, knock, knock, "Penny!"
Knock, knock, knock, "Penny!"

She opened the door immediately and looked concerned. "Sheldon, what are you doing out of bed?"

Sheldon just looked at her and tried to figure out exactly why he had come over in the first place. Finally, his mind settled on a valid reason. "I just wanted to say…thank you…for being my friend and for helping me when I am sick."

"Awww!" she whispered, genuinely touched. "You're welcome, Sweetie. Are you sure that you are feeling well enough to be out of bed, though? Would you like some soup or something? I stocked up on some Chicken and Stars – just for you."

"Soup…" he murmured to himself as he remembered that particular part of his dream. Then he looked at Penny again and realized that she was the only woman besides his mother who had ever shown him that amount of concern. She was also the only woman whom he could tolerate for any amount of time. In fact, so many of her mannerisms which used to annoy or flabbergast him, he now found endearing. In one way or the other, their lives had both orbited and intersected each other's for years. Therefore, he took her outstretched hand and said, "I think that I would really enjoy some soup," before he allowed himself to be pulled into her apartment. As the door shut behind them, he gathered his courage to ask her awkwardly. "Do you believe in dreams?"

"Yes, Sheldon. I most definitely do," she replied. "Why? Are you going to make fun of me for believing in such hokum?"

"No, indeed," he assured her. "After all, dreams are often just a reflection of our subconscious wants and desires." Sheldon explained before he paused as he realized what he had just said.

After all, the thought that he really wanted Penny to be his soulmate was preposterous! Wasn't it? Then he remembered that dream kiss and moan, and he squirmed a little bit in the chair that he always claimed when he was at her apartment. His musings were interrupted, however, when Penny brought him his bowl of soup.

"Before you ask," she said just as he opened his mouth. "I used that food thermometer thingy that you gave me and it is exactly 185 degrees. However, I am sure it will be at the perfect temperature by the time you stop complaining and actually eat it!"

He could not help but to smile a little at those words. "You know me so well."

"Scary thought, isn't it?" Penny replied, but then she smiled back. "Now tell me about this dream that you obviously had. It must have been a good one because you're blushing."

"Penny, I'm flushed because I am feverish," he explained with his usual condescension…and he hoped that it was the truth. "However, you are correct about one thing. I did have an unusual dream. It was about an alternate or parallel universe where everyone had a soulmate."

"Oooh, that sounds exciting! Tell me about it. I am all ears," she said while she ignored his borderline rude tone, as usual.

"That would be odd…to actually be all ears. Wouldn't it?" Sheldon mused for a moment until she brought him back to attention with a snap of her fingers.

"Hey! Doctor Whack-a-doodle, are you going to tell me about this dream or not?"

"Yes, I am," he answered…and so he did.

First, he told her about Leonard and Leslie where she giggled and murmured, "Oh, I bet you just loved that!" Then, he went on to Howard and Bernadette. "Yay! Just like real life!" Next, he mentioned Amy and her prince. "A prince? Well, good for her!" Last, came the explanation of Raj and Hello Kitty. "Poor Raj! Maybe he will meet her for real at the next ComicCon." After this, Sheldon stopped talking and turned his attention eagerly towards his soup. He noted that Penny had been correct in her assumption that it would cool to the perfect temperature while he was talking. However, Penny was not letting him get off the hook that easy, not until she finished hearing about what she wanted to know.

"Well?" she asked.

"Well, what?" he countered and dreaded what he knew she was going to ask next. He soon found that he was correct.

"What about you? What about me? Who were our soulmates?" she asked eagerly.

His mouth suddenly went dry and he found that he just could not answer her question. However, he gave her a look which must have told her everything that she needed to know.

"Oh!" She just sat there startled for a moment, but then she started to laugh…and laugh…and laugh.

After a moment, Sheldon set down his bowl, got up, and went back to his own apartment without a word. Penny stopped laughing as she watched him leave. It occurred to her then that maybe he had not been joking...and that she might have hurt his feelings. Suddenly, she remembered what he had said about dreams reflecting someone's wants and desires. Could Sheldon actually want her? How did she feel about that? She wanted to say that the whole idea was crazy...but she just could not. She knew that she liked Sheldon a lot, but did she...could she...like him that way? She realized that she obviously had a lot of thinking to do before she went over there to apologize.

Sheldon's body had mainly recovered by the next day, but his mind was still in turmoil. He could not seem to get that dream out of his mind – especially the parts where he was alone with Penny in her bedroom. However, he also could not stop thinking about her laughter at the very thought of it, either. She obviously thought that the idea of being with him...much less being his soulmate...was ludicrous. Therefore, he did the only thing that he could do. He avoided her.

It was a good plan and it seemed to work for a while – until right after he had finished his dinner, anyway. (Ironically, Leonard had brought him soup to eat, as takeout from Soup Plantation, before going over to spend the night at Amy's.) At any rate, Penny had decided that enough was enough and she came to see him. She stormed into 4A as if she owned the place, looked him straight in the eye, and said, "Sheldon, we need to talk!"

"I agree," he said rationally as he went to set his bowl in the sink. Then, he walked back over to her and, apparently without any conscious thought on the matter, kissed her just as he had done in his dream. He simply had to know - one way or the other. Therefore, when he saw his chance, he took it - just like Captain James T. Kirk would - full speed ahead, consequences be damned!

At first, she reacted just like Dream Penny had. She relaxed into the kiss and returned it. However, it was not until she moaned that she suddenly realized what was actually happening. "What the hell, Sheldon!" Penny yelled then as she pulled back in shock. She did not move away completely, though. She just stood there, with ragged breathing that matched his own, and eyed him for a moment before she surprised him completely as she launched herself back at him. In just a few seconds, Sheldon found himself pushed backwards onto the sofa and in the unlikely position of being straddled by Penny while her tongue engaged in a wrestling match with his own. He tried to analyze this fascinating turn of events, so that he could determine what to do next. However, apparently all the blood from his brain was needed elsewhere at the moment and he found that he could no longer rationalize. Therefore, his mind waved a white flag of surrender to his body and he just followed wherever it took him. That apparently turned out to be his bedroom…where Penny continued to fascinate him, and to show him how to fascinate her, as well, for the rest of the evening. As they lay exhausted in each other's arms afterwards, she finally turned towards him to apologize.

"I really am sorry for laughing yesterday, Sweetie. You just took me by surprise. However, after you left, I started to think about it and I realized that maybe it wasn't such a crazy idea, after all. We have become really good friends over the years. Therefore, maybe it was time for more…maybe it was time for this." She gestured at their bodies on the bed together. "In fact, I really hoped that it was. I just didn't know how to tell you, though…not until you kissed me earlier…and then it was like everything finally clicked into place!"

"Soulmates?" Sheldon asked.

"Let's find out!" Penny suggested…and they set out to explore each other's bodies again.

"Um...Buddy? Wanna catch me up to speed here?" Leonard asked uncertainly the next morning when he walked into Apartment 4A with Amy in order to check on Sheldon. However, the sight of Penny wearing Sheldon's pajama top as she made French toast while he wore the bottoms and prepared the coffee temporarily short circuited his brain.

"Well, Leonard…I think that it is fairly obvious," his roommate answered matter-of-factly. At Leonard's continued blank look, Sheldon made a little sound between a huff and a sigh. "Last night, Penny and I engaged in coitus…multiple times, in fact. We are currently preparing our post-coital breakfast together. Now that you are up to speed, considering the early hour and the look of distress upon your face, I feel that I should offer you a hot beverage." He held out the coffee mug that he had just filled, but Leonard made no move to take it. In fact, he just stood there in shock with his mouth open a little bit.

Amy had no such trouble, however. She took the mug herself while providing a hearty "Way to go, Bestie!" in a congratulatory tone to Penny. She even held up her hand with the intent to complete a social convention designed to display approval or pride with the actions of another.

"Thank you!" answered Penny smugly, as she completed the high-five. "Sheldon dreamed that we were soulmates. He must have been right because now we have matching bite marks. Do you want to know where?"

Amy, who clearly remembered their conversation with Bernadette, just smiled. "Oh, I think that I can guess!" she exclaimed with a laugh. "No self-loathing this time, though...I hope?"

"None at all!" Penny assured her, as they cheerfully clinked their coffee mugs together while Sheldon watched in fond bemusement. He did not even complain about how much he disliked clinking.

"I don't think...no...I know for a fact that I don't want to know what you two are talking about!" Leonard muttered. Penny just laughed at him and then went on to enjoy their aforementioned breakfast with Sheldon. The two of them happily shared their meal with Amy, who wanted to know all of the sordid details, while Leonard was busy still trying to process this new reality.

Maybe I am the one who is dreaming, he thought rationally as he watched Sheldon-I-don't-like-to-be-touched-Cooper actually lean over and kiss Penny gently. A sudden realization came to him then as he watched the two of them together. Sheldon was happy, he was smiling, and his normally ramrod straight posture was relaxed. He was even chatting! It was almost as if a real human persona had replaced the semi-robotic one that Leonard had always known. Therefore, maybe...just maybe...Penny was exactly what Sheldon had needed all along.

Maybe she really was his soulmate.