A Request for an Audience

The Golden Boy Finally Gone Around the Bend?

He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is back! There was a mighty battle between good and evil not so long ago in the Ministry of Magic. Teenagers rushed into a fight they had somehow managed to find before the Aurors. Death Eaters came and fought the teenagers, with the Aurors barely arriving in time to stop any serious damage to occur to the building or to the children.

All present at the time claim that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is back - except the Death Eaters, oddly enough.

But this reporter thinks not! After all, everyone who was present at the time was Harry Potter and his friends, Albus Dumbledore's followers and people from the Ministry who can be persuaded to lie. This reporter feels that the public should not be fooled into thinking that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is back so that the Golden Boy of...

"I've had enough," Harry pushed back from the rickety table, his hands smacking on top of the wood in time with the legs of the chair screeching against the floor. After a moment he snarled and he flung the newspaper against the soiled wall. "I'm done, Hermione. I refuse to... I can't... I won't..." He pulled at his black hair, scowling at everything.

"Alright, Harry" she murmured, patting his back. She sat beside him, her eyes roaming the beat down old motel room they were staying in.

He sighed, closing his eyes as he leant his head against the back of the chair. "I don't want to deal with them anymore," he whispered.

It was all too much. At first the magical world had been his hope for a new chance at life. He had somewhere to be away from the Dursleys and their lifestyle. He could figure out why the crazy things that happened around him occured.

His emerald eyes opened and drifted down to his clothing. All the pieces were baggy and ratted, hiding his thin frame. The sleeves of the sweater falling past his fingers. The sneakers he wore had the soles worn down and had him slipping around, and the left one had a hole under his pinky toe.

"I know, Harry. You don't have to."

But then Dumbledore had entered into his life. The old man had always kept things from him, kept sending him back to the Dursley's for his protection. Harry sneered at the thought as he stood up and began to pace. Perhaps Dumbledore had always been in the shadows manipulating his life.

After Dumbledore became a fixture in his life, the magical world seemed to hold him back. As soon as Harry felt like he was learning something useful, something came along to yank him in the opposite direction. He wanted to tap into his magic and become more than he was. The only one willing to teach Harry - besides Hermione - had been Remus, but he had left Hogwarts and hadn't taught Harry anything since due to orders from Dumbledore.

His fingers clutched at the letter in his hands. "Is this the way to do it, Hermione?"

And Ron. His friend. His supposed best mate. He had been spying on him for Dumbledore. Whatever Harry did, Ron went and told the old coot. When Harry had told him what had happened at the Dursleys, Ron had acted like he should have: outraged for Harry.

But then, not even two hours later, Harry had been called into the Headmaster's office. And there, Dumbledore had asked him to stop exaggerating the truth.

"To do what you want, Harry, I think so. And you know I'll be there for you. No matter what."

Pausing, Harry unfurled his fingers to stare at the seemingly innocent paper. The paper that would change his life.

If he sent it, the possibility of death was high. For both of them.

But if they survived so many new avenues would be open to them. New things to learn, more power, no more Dursley's, no more pain, no more weakness. Make Dumbledore pay.

"Then let's send it."

Draco Malfoy

Draco peered at the letter with his name scrawled across it. The handwriting looked familiar, though he couldn't quite place it. Shrugging, the blonde handed the Barn Owl a treat before the beast flew on top of the drawer and waited, eyes drilled on him.

So, the animal wanted an answer.

With a roll of his eyes, he flopped onto his bed, bringing the paper to his face as he opened it to read.

Malfoy,

I don't suppose you were expecting a letter from me, ever. But things have come up and what I want is no longer what others want me to want.

Draco sneered at the appalling sentence, but continued to read.

I wish for an audience with the Dark Lord. As such, I will meet you somewhere of your choice. I will be with one other person, and we will both surrender our wands at that point and time.

Give me a time and place, we will meet you there. Write it on the back of this parchment.

Harry Potter

P.S. There is also a charm here that makes it impossible to write a lie, Hermione's brilliant like that. And, as such, no one will be warned about this meeting. You should try writing a lie, it'll change into a truth.

Draco stared at the paper, head cocked to the side before a smirk spread over his face. He grabbed a quill and tried to write, The Day is July 3rd, but it quickly changed to: The Day is July 4th.

His smirk morphed into a wide grin, his thoughts going to handing over Potter to the Dark Lord.

A/N: Hello lovelies, have a new story. This is going to be very, very AU (could you tell?) This is the first time I've tried something like this - I think it's called a Crack Fic? I'm not sure. But Mom adores this story so I must have done something right, hence why it's being posted.

Fun fact, this fic had its start because of Behind the Mask - yep, this chapter first saw light on Dec 20, 2012 (almost eight freaking years ago...). That story had so much going on that this just came out because I needed a reprieve from angst angst angst. I recently refound this fic and realized I had written 28 out of 32 chapters between 2012 and 2013. Since it had been mostly complete, I decided to finish it.

So, fair warning: Since this fic is so old, I could have completely revamped it, but I enjoyed it as is and merely edited where it was needed. Another warning: there are three different POVs in this story, so it'll jump from person to person for each chapter, sometimes even during the same chapter.

I know my stories never show it, but I don't actually dislike Dumbledore. He's awesome, I just... can't apparently write him other than a manipulator... Sorry...

Also, this fic has no pairings. None. Nada. Ok, that's not true starting at ch. 30.. Not saying who, though. (no slash this time)

AJ Freas has edited this, and this story is complete. I'll be posting every Monday/Wednesday/Friday until all 32 chapters are up. I hope you guys enjoy this crazy, nonsensical ride. :)