Christmas With Freakazoid!

"So, you got stabbed in the back, and there's nothing but a bruise?" Cosgrove asked, munching on his third cinnamon knot and leaning on the side of his car.

Freakazoid nodded and threw away his now empty cinnamon knot box. "Yep! Still hurt though. At least the bruise is almost gone."

Freakazoid lifted his shirt to show the now almost invisible bruise. It didn't even hurt anymore. Cosgrove leaned forward and inspected the small bruise for and moment, then leaned back and pulled out another cinnamon knot.

"Pretty impressive. Maybe you have some sort of healing factor."

Freakazoid snorted and shook his head. "What? That's ridiculous!"

After a few seconds he leaned forward and asked more earnestly. "Do you really think so?"

Cosgrove nodded. "Looks like it. I wouldn't go testing it out though."

Freakazoid nodded and leaned against Cosgroves car. "What do you do when someone tries to stab you Cosgrove?"

"I just tell them to cut it out."

Freakazoid nodded in understanding. "That makes sense."

*-Can't get you outta my head~Boy your loving is all I can think about~I just can't-*

Freakazoid and Cosgrove both started to do the where-is-my-phone macarena before Freakazoid chuckled and grabbed his vibrating butt.

"That's me!" Freakazoid pulled out his phone and answered despite Dexter's mental protests.

"Yellow! Who dis?"

"Dexter? It's Steff! Dexter you wanna come over? I could use some help with your costume."

"Steff! Well sure, I'd love to help!" Freakazoid was grinning from ear to ear as he silently swooned, literal hearts bubbling up from his head and popping before they could fly away.

'Don't! Stop talking! She'll notice I'm not- you're not me!'

Freakazoid ignored Dexter in favor of cradling his phone and grinning like a love sick idiot.

"That's great! Come over to my house. My parents aren't home, so you don't worry about my mom needling you till you're in a new Christmas sweater."

Freakazoid laughed a little too loudly at Stephanie's joke, blushing as he realized how obvious he was being. "Th-that's great! I'll head right over!"

Dexter was divided between being embarrassed at Freakazoids obvious display of their crush, or the strangeness of seeing Freakazoid actually get embarrassed of himself. He didn't even think the guy got embarrassed.

Freakazoid put away his phone and cleared his throat, then turned to Cosgrove and clasped his hands pleadingly. "Hey Cosgrove? Can you drop me off at Steff's place? Don't mean to treat you like a taxi…"

Cosgrove swallowed his last cinnamon knot and nodded kindly. "It's fine kid, Just call me when you need to head back home."

Freakazoid rushed forward and gave Cosgrove a big hug, then slid into the car's passengers seat and buckled his seatbelt eagerly.

"Thanks Cosgrove! You're the best!"

'We should switch back Freak. Steff is expecting me.'

Freakazoid frowned, then sighed and nodded.

"You're right. See you later Cosgrove! Freak In!"

Cosgrove leaned away from the flash of sparks and static. Dexter shivered as a particularly strong current flickered down his back. He'd never get used to that.

Dexter looked over to Cosgrove and smiled awkwardly.

"Th-thanks for all this Cosgrove. You really are the best."

Cosgrove smiled as nodded knowingly, getting into the driver's seat and starting the car. "No problem kid."

"-and so I was thinking we go with this cloth instead! I think it'll help the feathers stick to it better. What do you think Dexter?" Steff asked earnestly.

'I think you're the smartest, coolest, most talented person I've ever met.' Freakazoid sighed dreamily from inside Dexter's head,

Dexter held back from smacking his own head and blushed. Why did he have to be like this? Why couldn't he just bury his feeling like a normal person instead of voicing every single thing Dexter had ever thought? It was torture!'

"Dexter? Are you okay?" Steff leaned forward, brows creased slightly in worry.

Dexter shuffled back from Steff onto the other side of her living room couch and blushed in embarrassment. He'd forgotten to answer!

"Uh, yes? Sorry Steff, I don't get clothing design like you do…" Dexter scratched his neck and looked away. Steff huffed in playful exasperation and leaned back again.

"Dexter! You're probably one of the smartest people I know. You pick things up like a magic eraser. You probably know more about-I don't know-paper clips, than I know about clothing design."

'Actually, about that paper clip thing-'

"Steeeffff. You're being embarrassing…" Dexter wined, one hand covering his face on instinct.

At this point Dexter was a blushing mess. Steff was always complimenting him, and it always managed to make him super flustered.

'Maybe she's flirting! Maybe she likes us back Dexter! Ask her! Ask her!'

Dexter just shook his head, not bothering to tell Freakazoid the countless reasons why that would never happen. Steff giggled at Dexter and gave him a consoling side hug.

"I'm soooorry! I just can't help it! You're adorable when you get all humble. Which you are, by the by."

Dexter gave her a wry smile and shook his head again. "Well what am I supposed to say to that? If I say I'm not, I am, and if I say I am, then you win. Way to put me in a corner Steff."

Steff straightened up proudly and smiled."I know, I'm a genius." She jokingly gloated, then giggled at her ridiculous display. "I'm also very humble, as you can tell."

Dexter relaxed and chuckled, then picked up Steff's new sketches and looked them over again.

"So Bird Plane Girl? Is that even a thing?" He asked, looking over the designs critically.

Steff shrugged as she folded the cloth she'd been showing off and set it aside.

"If there's a popular superhero, he's gonna have a girl version eventually. So if there isn't one already, you can bet there will be."

Dexter raised a hand in an effort to disprove the theory, but after a moment of thought, he dropped it and shrugged. "You got me. Bet you ten bucks someone at the con pretends to recognize you from the official comics."

Steff grinned and pulled a twenty, slapping it on the table dramatically. "I bet you double someone at the con really does recognize me from the official comics and proves it to me!"

'She's amazing. Dexter for the love of everything deep fried and covered in cheese, ASK HER OUT!'

Dexter ignored the worryingly familiar train of thought and put on his most confident smile.

"Deal. Get ready to fork over that twenty when we go to the con, cause I've never heard of Bird Plane Girl!" He challenged, leaned forward and grinning.

"Well you better get familiar Dexter, cause you're gonna be hearing a lot about her once we get to that con." Steff shot back, leaning forward till their noses were almost touching.

'Now kiss her!'

Dexter suddenly blushed at the proximity reminder and leaned back, laughing awkwardly and rubbing his neck. Steff just smiled and pulled the costume sketches from Dexter's hands. She tucked some hair behind her ear and blushed slightly, looking up at Dexter through her eyelashes.

"Thanks for all you help today Dexter. Master clothing designer or not, I still appreciate it."

Dexter's mouth suddenly went dry and all he could think was-what were we talking about again?

'You were going to ask Steff if she wanted to go on a date with us. Don't you remember? We talked about this.'

Freakazoid's voice snapped him out of his stupor and Dexter held back explaining that they'd talked about how they were never asking her out, not the other way around!

"It's really no problem Steff. You're the one helping me make my costume, I should be thanking you…"

Steff smiled warmly. "Then I guess we both owe each other, huh? How about you make it up to me by taking me to the Valentines Day Dance?"

'Dexter! I think we're hallucinating. What were in those cinnamon knots?'

Dexter's mouth fell open in shock a he tried to articulate a coherent response. "A-are you serious?"

Steff flushed and looked down, biting her lip anxiously. "I get if you have someone else you were planning to go with. I just thought-"

'Never mind, this is REAL! Say yes!'

"Uh, no! No I'm-I'm not going with anybody...I'd lo-really like to go with you."

Steff eyes lit up and she beamed at him, then pulled Dexter into a quick hug. "That's awesome! It's gonna be the best dance ever!"

Dexter hugged back on instinct and blushed a bit, then frowned as he pulled away. "Not that I don't like the idea of going to the dance with you, but didn't anyone else want to go with you?"

Steff crossed her arms and rolled her eyes."Well, yeah, a couple guys did ask me. I just think it'd be more fun if I went with someone I actually like. Most of the guys who asked don't even know me."

She leaned back into the couch cushions and nudged Dexter playfully. "Besides, these dances aren't exactly known for their stellar party planning. I might be a member of the student council, but I can only do so much! I'd feel a lot better if I had a friend there to distract me from the corny decorations and the cruddy playlist."

Dexter nodded sympathetically. From what Steff told him about the student council, it had probably been a nightmare planning the dance with them. She'd told him she'd had to spend an entire week convincing the rest of the council to allow public hand holding.

'Did you hear that? She said she likes us! She turned down other guys for us!'

'She also said she'd feel a lot better with a friend', Dexter though back in frustration.

*-Mommaaaaaaa~Just killed a maaaaaan~Put a gun against his head, pull-*

He jumped when his phone vibrated in his pocket and he pulled it out to answer, giving Steff and apologetic shrug. He tapped his screen and relaxed at the name that popped up. It was his mom.

"Sorry, Steff. I need to take this." Dexter pressed answer as Steff nodded.

"-uncan, you're fine. Dexter? Hey sweetie! How are you? Have you eaten anything today?"

Dexter smiled, standing and walking over to Steff's kitchen for a bit of privacy.

"I'm fine mom. Actually, officer Cosgrove took me out for pizza, so I'm good food wise. Besides, I still have leftovers if I get hungry."

"Oh really? That's so nice of him! Remember to say thank you Dexter. He's been such a great help to us recently."

Dexter leaned against the kitchen counter and chuckled. "Yeah, I did mom, don't worry. I'm actually at Steff's right now. Cosgrove's gonna drop me off back home when I leave, so I'll give him a thank you from you too."

"That would be great honey. I'm sorry I we can't be with you right now, especially right before Christmas-"

"It's fine mom. We'll all be together for Christmas tomorrow anyway, and that's all that really matters." Dexter comforted.

"I know Dex, I just worry sometimes. I'm just glad you've been safe with officer Cosgrove today. I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you while I was gone."

Dexter shifted nervously and unconsciously grabbed onto the torn area of his shirt.

'Yeaaaaaah...Don't tell mom.'

Dexter laughed anxiously. "Something happen to me? After yesterday? Fat chance! Or-or is it slim chance? Well, in any case, I'm staying out of trouble, so, no need to worry!"

"I'll try not to! Between you and your brother, I know you tend to be the responsible one." Debbie laughed.

"Well, I have to go sweetie. You be good okay? And say hi to Steff for me!"

Dexter nodded as he pushed himself off the counter. "Sure mom. Love you, bye."

"Love you more! *Beep*"

Dexter sighed and went back to sit on the living room couch, shoving his phone into his pocket.

"So, not that I was snooping or anything, but…"

Dexter froze as Steff leaned closer to him looked over him suspiciously.

"That's one serious tear you got there. Did you try to cut your shirt or something?" Steff reached over and pulled at the torn piece of the shirt curiously.

'So, I say we tell her we got in a knife fight with an owl and won! Just a suggestion.'

"Uh, duh, that's-I-I don't know what that's from, actually. You're-you're guess is as good as mine!"

Steff raised her eyebrows in a confused manner and pulled back. After a full second of narrowing down alternative routes, Dexter decided running for the hills would be easier than explaining the last two days to his best friend.

"Um, actually! I should be heading home." Dexter stood up quickly and speed walked his way to Steff's front door before the girl could protest. "See you later Steff!

He didn't think he'd ever know how to tell her about what was happening to him. What would she even think of Freakazoid? What if she thought he was crazy? No way was he risking that!

"Dexter!? Uh, bye! I guess? See you!" Steff called after him as he continued to power walk out the door and down the sidewalk. Dexter waved goodbye awkwardly and turned a corner, feeling the anxiety slowly drain from his blood stream the farther he got from Steff's house.

'Whew! That was a close one! If we'd stayed any longer she might have suspected something. Good thing you're about as smooth a chunky peanut butter without the butter!'

Dexter grabbed his hair and pulled at it in frustration. "I know! I just get so nervous-"

'Yeah, no kidding! I can feel it Dexter, it's so distracting! You know if it were me-'

"If it had been you, you would have been a total creep! Speaking of, thanks for the helpful commentary! Really needed you there, listing off your favorite things about Steffs hair."

'Our favorite things! And I can't help it! I'm being serious, I literally can't stop. It's kind of embarrassing actually.'

Dexter slowed his pace and scoffed. "You can feel embarrassed? Stop the presses! Freakazoid has the ability to exercise prudence!"

'Very funny. You're a comic and a coward!'

Dexter stopped and smacked his forehead, cringing at the sting but smirking at the sound of Freakazoid's yells of protest.

"I'm not a coward, I'm just prioritizing my relationships! Be honest Freak, do you really think Steff couldn't do way better than us?" Dexter rubbed his forehead tenderly and rolled his eyes at the sound of Freakazoid grumbling insults.

'Well it seems like I inherited all of moms optimism, cause I'm gonna give you a strong maybe!'

Dexter started walking again and gave Freakazoid an unimpressed frown. "Wow. Really layering it on thick, aren't you?"

'It's not my fault we have such low self esteem. I'm trying here, you're just not giving me a lot to work with.'

Dexter slowed as the neighborhood gave way to a cluster of small business buildings. He looked both ways, then quickly ran across the street to the printing company on the other side.

'We're a superhero for Pete's sake! Yet you've still retained the self confidence of a one off side character.'

As Dexter strolled down the sidewalk passed the printing building he burst out laughing.

"What?! Haha! How? How are we a superhero in any way?"

'You want a list? We have a rich arch nemesis, we have super powers, you're mild mannered as heck- no offense.'

"Offense taken!"

'-and we served out justice! Like a hero does! Think of how impressed Steff would be if she knew what we can do!'

Dexter's steps faltered for a moment. "Gutierrez isn't our nemesis, we have one power, and we didn't serve out justice! That skin thing was probably a fluke. We almost got stabbed by a sixth grader and for all you know, Jim was using a dull knife!"

'We both that's not true. Jim isn't the type to actually use that knife outside of showing it off. That thing might as well have been brand knew!'

"So what? We're still nothing like a superhero. Hero's fight super villains! All we have around here is petty theft and assault. I think Cosgrove can take care of that kind of thing."

'We could try.'

Dexter sighed and shook his head. "Freak, we really shouldn't be calling attention to ourselves right now. Unless we're fighting in self defense, I don't think we should be doing any heroics."

'...'

"Freak? Look, you can still come out and hang around with Cosgro-"

'Didn't you see that? Dexter the alley you just passed! Back up, back up!'

Dexter stopped at Freakazoids urgent tone and looked back at the gap between a bank and an ice cream place he'd just walked passed.

'Wait! Stay near the wall, don't let him see you!'

Dexter went against the brick wall of the ice cream place and frowned in worry. "Who? Don't let who see me?" He whispered anxiously. Why couldn't today be normal?

'Just look! But be careful!'

Dexter scooted along the wall, stopping at the corner and peeking into the alley. There were two men at the very back, but it was a little too dark to see much. It was getting late and the shadows were making it hard to see anything other than two silhouettes.

"Freak, what am I seeing?" Dexter whispered.

'I saw them when they were closer. Some guy's getting mugged! We have to do something!'

"No. No we don't. We need to call Cosgrove so he can do his job. He'll be here in no time, just give me a second."

Dexter pulled out his phone and quickly pushed Cosgroves name. He felt the stress of the situation as he paced and Cosgrove didn't answer, the dial tone playing uselessly. Why now of all times was he busy?!

'Dexter, switch with me! That suit guy could be getting hurt!'

"We can't! What if he has a gun? Or-or it's not even a mugging-"

"HELP! HE-"

Dexter trailed off as the sound of a violent scuffle cut off the stranger in the alley. Freak was right. He needed to do something. Dexter pressed his back against the brick wall and took a deep breath.

"Be careful Freak. Freak Out!"

SHA-ZAP!

"I will be!" Freakazoid promised as he ran straight into the alley. Stopping a few feet away from the two men Freakazoid did the only thing that came to mind.

"HEY!...Cut it out."

'Seriously?!'

Freakazoid ignored Dexter in favor of looking over the suit guy for any injuries. He didn't know why Dexter hadn't been able to see them properly. Sure, it was kinds dark but Freakazoid could see them perfectly well.

The guy getting mugged was in a nice business suit and seemed to be protecting a suitcase, wincing at the thick cut on his left cheek the mugger had given him. The mugger was dressed in a green turtleneck and had a gray beanie over his ratty brunette hair.

The mugger looked over Freakazoid with the most baffled expression Freak had ever seen. It would have been really funny in pretty much any other situation. Wait no, scratch that. It was still funny.

"What the hell are you supposed to be? Frankenstein's brother? Get outta here kid!" The mugger sneered, fisting the suit guys collar and holding up a sharp pocket knife.

Freakazoid grimaced at the knife and crossed his arms defensively. "A knife? Really? What is it with knives today? Is it a theme?"

The suit guy looked between Freakazoid and the mugger and seemed to be trying to convey some kind of message to Freakazoid through frantic eye movements and eyebrow twitches. Freakazoid felt a small pang of pity at the state the guy was in. He seemed to be having it pretty rough.

"I said back off! Walk away right now or I swear I'll stab your face off!" The mugger threatened, waving his knife around wildly.

Freakazoid glared at the knife and rushed forward, catching it by the blade right before it hit his face.

'Whoa! Are you-is that cutting you right now?'

The mugger paled as Freakazoid tightened his grip on the blade and yanked it out from his hand, causing the man to stumbled forward in shock and let go of the suit guys collar. The suit guy scrambled away from the mugger and ran to cower behind Freakazoid, still gripping his suitcase protectively.

Freakazoid grinned and looked over the blade curiously. It had felt uncomfortable to squeeze, but it wasn't cutting him or even bruising.

"Hah! I told you I had super skin!" Freakazoid gloated. He briefly considered keeping the knife, but it wasn't really his style. He grabbed the knife by the handle and jammed it into the brick wall of the ice cream store, making sure it was pushed all the way in. He really didn't like knives, they were annoying.

"You-you-!" The mugger looked at the hilted pocket knife in horror then turned to look back a Freakazoid in a new, threatening light. He crouched, then pulled back his fist and swung at Freakazoid face desperately. Freakazoid ducked, then decided to take a page out of Rick O'Sheas book. Specifically, the football manual.

"HUT HUT!" Freakazoid barked out. He clenched his fists and tackled the mugger with all his weight.

"Urgh!" The mugger was slammed into the wall at the end of the alley.

Freakazoid grinned and quickly pulled back, looked down at the mugger as the man fell to his knees and started coughing. Hopefully this guy was down for the count.

"Who are you? Why-why are you blue?"

Freakazoid turned around and took a nervous step back as the suit guy questioned him. He'd almost forgotten he was still there. Why was he still here?

"Uhhhhhhh...Are you okay? You got some...on your face?" Freakazoid said awkwardly. He was bad at deflecting, but he would at least get an A for effort!

"My face?" The suit guy went to touch the bleeding cut on his cheek but quickly pulled his hand away. "Oh! Yes, I'm-I'll be okay. I just-Thank You! Thank you so much!" The suit guy stepped forward and grabbed Freakazoids hands, shaking them earnestly and smiling in relief.

"You saved me! Thank you for helping me! My name's Robin, Robin Banks!"

Freakazoid smiled at the show of appreciation and after looking over his shoulder to make sure -A-Lot wasn't getting up again, turned back to Robin and pulled them both out of the alley.

"You're welcome Robin, just doing my part! Speaking of the parts we play, am I right to assume you got a junk load of cash in that suitcase there?" Freakazoid craned his neck to see the mystery suitcase the Robin was currently hiding behind his back.

Robin froze, then shook his head meekly, taking a cautious step away from Freakazoid. "Uh no, not money…"

Freakazoid grinned as his curiosity was thoroughly agitated and took a purposeful step forward.

Not money? Then why was that guy after you? What's in the suitcase Robin? Counterfeit chocolate coins? Super weapons? Rare hard candy? Government secrets?"

With each question Freakazoid took another looming step forward and with each step Robin shrank back even more.

'You're creeping him out Freak. Cut it out.'

Freakazoid pouted and took a hesitant step back. Was he being weird? He was just curious! "Uh, well, whatever it is, I'm just glad I could help? You should get outta here, I'll call the police so don't worry about ."

Robin nodded and ran off to his car, jumping into the driver's seat and driving away so quickly the tires screeched.

"Wow. Maybe he left the stove on?"

'Or maybe you freaked him out more than a literal mugger with a knife? What's with you?'

Freakazoid pulled out his phone and called Cosgrove again. "We were just curious. Don't tell me you didn't want to see what was in that suitcase, I know you did. It's not like I forced him to show me!"

"-Hey kid. Sorry I missed your call, I was busy. Where are you?"

Freakazoid felt the rush of his earlier fight start to drain from him and he grinned in relief at the sound of Cosgroves voice.

"I'm in front of the ice cream place near Steffs house. Do have your handcuffs on you? I think you're gonna need them."

Freakazoid quickly hung up as Cosgroves car came around the corner and slowed in front of him. Cosgrove got out of the car and walked over to Freakazoid in concern.

"What's up kid?"

Freakazoid pointed over to the darkened alley. "I beat up this guy who was attacking Robin and trying to steal his mystery suitcase. He's still in there."

Cosgrove raised an eyebrow skeptically, then pulled his cuffs out and went into the alley.

'That was pretty cool. The whole stopping a mugger thing, I mean.'

Freakazoid went over to the police car and slid into the driver's seat. "I know! Don't deny it, you kinda felt like a superhero back there right?"

'...A little.'

Freakazoid jumped up and down excitedly, accidentally rocking the entire car as he did. "Seeee?! It's destiny Dexter, this is our calling!"

'I wouldn't go that far. What's with this sudden superhero obsession?'

Freakazoid froze, then looked down at his hands and twiddled his thumbs nervously. "Well...I just think, if we were a superhero, maybe we'd be good enough for Steff…"

'...I hate to say this, but I was kind of thinking that too.'

Freakazoid sighed and slumped in his seat. "Of course you were. If I think it, it's only cause you do too. Was kind of hoping you'd deny it though."

'Why?'

Freakazoid shrugged. "Because if we're agreeing on something, then I have to do it. You're like, ninety-five percent of my impulse control. At least if you'd denied it, we'd have an excuse to not do it."

'You're seriously going to try to be a superhero?'

Freakazoid sat up again and nodded in determination. "Like mom always says, "There is no try, only do!". We're gonna be an awesome superhero!"

'I think we should at least get a second opinion. And therapy. For you. You should go to therapy.'

Freakazoid laughed dryly and slapped his knee. "HAHAHa! Oh Dexter, you crack me up! But yes to that second opinion thing. I nominate Cosgrove!"

"Nominate me for what?" Cosgrove asked, pushing a angry looking mugger into the back of the car.

Freakazoid gave the mugger a threatening smile that wiped the scowl right off his face, then turned back to Cosgrove. "Me and-"

'Don't say my name in front of that guy!'

"-my other me were wondering if we could be a superhero. What do you think?"

Cosgrove got into the driver's seat and started the car. "You really want my advice?"

Freakazoid nodded eagerly and put on his seatbelt.

"Freakazoid, crime fighting is a serious job. If you really want to be a superhero, you're going to have to put the lives of others before your own. You should only do it if you want to help people. Are you doing it to help people?"

Freakazoid shrunk back a bit and shrugged. "Do I count as people?" He tried.

Cosgrove stared him down for a few seconds, then smiled and began driving in the direction of Dexter's home. "You do count as people. I think both of you would be better off thinking things over before you make any decisions. Being a hero is a pretty big job, and you're only sixteen."

Freakazoid relaxed and nodded. He looked back at the mugger who was being weirdly silent only to see he was currently trying to push himself as far away from Freakazoid as possible. Freakazoid gave the mugger another smile, then tuned to Cosgrove worriedly.

"Did I do the right thing? The whole stopping-the-mugger thing? It was my first time, so I don't really have much of a basis for the etiquette."

Cosgrove smiled and nodded. "You did a good job today kid. Defending yourself and helping others is always a victory in my book."

Freakazoid beamed at the praise and puffed out his chest. "Thanks Cosgrove, glad I could get OCA on my work."

"OCA?"

"Official Cosgrove Approval! So are you throwing this guy in jail?" FReakazoid asked, pointing the frightened looked man in the back seat.

Cosgrove nodded. "Yup. Can you tell me the name of the person he tried to assault?"

"You mean Robin Banks? Why?" Freakazoid asked.

"Names are important. Also, I was curious." Cosgrove responded nonchalantly.

Before Freakazoid could respond to that, the car slowed to a stop in front of his house. Freakazoid looked over to his home in confusion for a moment, then shrugged. Cosgrove did say being fast was a part of his job.

"I still owe you a snow cone kid. Just call me and we'll go." Cosgrove said as Freakazoid closed the car door and started heading for his front door.

Freakazoid gave Cosgrove a thumbs up, walking backwards to his door while doing so. "Will do! Merry Christmas Cosgrove!"

Cosgrove smiled and gave Freakazoid a thumbs in reply, then drove off into the night. Freakazoid watched the car go till he couldn't see it anymore, then went to his front door and went inside.

'Christmas is tomorrow? Why does it feel like today's been months long?'

Freakazoid locked the door behind him and raced up to his room. "I dunno! Maybe because we've won more fights in one day than in our entire life combined?"

Freakazoid slammed his bedroom door behind him and his eyes immediately locked onto Mr. Chubbikins.

'Don't you dare. You traumatized him last time! He has a fear of blankets now because of you!'

Freakazoid cringed as he resisted the urge to scoop up Mr. Chubbikins and threw himself onto his bed in exasperation.

"FINE! If I can't hug him, then you do it for me! Freak In!"

SHA-ZAP!

Dexter jolted up, shuddering at the tingling sensation the static sparks left him and frowning. He could have at least warned him!

"Don't be a baby about it Freak. If you just pet him like a normal person then I wouldn't have to keep you from him. Speaking of Mr. Chubbikins…" Dexter got off the bed and went downstairs to the kitchen to check on food and water.

'We should get him a fish! Cats still eat fish right?'

Dexter smiled and shook his head. "No way. Think of the smell! Besides, we're feeding Mr. Chubbikins enough as is."

Dexter changes the cats water, the sighed as his stomach growled. He'd hadn't eaten since Cosgrove had taken them to get pizza. He opened the fridge and after looking over the leftover choices, took out a container of tuna casserole.

"Leftovers it is…" He said as he loosened the lid to the container and pushed the casserole into the microwave.

'Hey Dexter?'

Dexter watched the slowly spinning food dully. "Hmmm?"

'We could be good enough. For Steff I mean. If we really tried, we could be.'

Dexter sighed and straightened up. "You sound so sure...How can you be so sure?"

'We wanna be happy Dex, I have to be. One of us has to be sure.'

Dexter cracked a weak smile, the microwave beeping as he did. " And being a superhero. That's our plan?"

'I dunno. We kinda want it to be. Who knows? We could be really good at it!'

Dexter pulled out his food and took out a fork. "Or we could be a total failure. We could end up hurting people instead of helping them! I just don't think we should risk it."

'I think we should at least try. We did something good today, you can't deny that! Just one more try, just to see? Please?'

Dexter shoved some casserole into his mouth and thought about it. Freakazoid was a wild card with super strength and durability who never seemed to think about the consequences of anything he did.

'Hey! I can hear you!'

On the other hand, Freak was technically some weird sort of extension of him. He wanted the same things he wanted, just with little regard to the aftermath of his actions. He wasn't a bad guy, he just needed...impulse control.

"-You're like, ninety-five percent of my impulse control.-"

And Freakazoid had him. In his head, always there to make sure he wouldn't take things too far. As far as he could tell, Freakazoid seemed to respect his opinions too. Maybe if they worked together-

'See? We could make it work. And if it doesn't? At least we tried!'

"I...okay, maybe we could try. But only if there's an actual threat! We're not going out patrolling or anything like that!"

'YES!'

Dexter tried to think of something discouraging to counter with, but Freakazoids optimism was contagious. He smiled and ate another forkful of his mom's casserole. The chances of anything hero worthy happening were slim to none, but considering how his last two days had been, who knew? With his luck, he'd be battling a radioactive zombie cowboy or something by Saturday.

'Zombie Cowboy? And you say I'm weird.'

Dexter shrugged. For now, the only thing he was seriously looking forward to was Christmas. Just a day full of family and food and presents. Dexter looked over to the window as small flakes of snow started to fall, then looked down at his watch and grinned.

"Merry Christmas Freakazoid!"

Two chapters in one day! I was originally planning one making one, but it got too long. Oops!

I was planning on giving Freakazoid an epic superhero debut! I still plan to, but I like to think this mugger situation was technically his first selfless heroic act. And aren't Steff and Dexter cute together? Ahh young love, they say it never lasts! Lets hope Dexter grows a spine and prevails anyway!

Luna M. Moon, I am trying my best to make Freakazoid as morally ambiguous as possible, even at the cost of his humanity. Is he even human? As you can see, the answer is a strong maybe at best.