Accidental dreams
The day was bright, sunny and clear. We challenged down the hill on bikes; screaming brakes. And smacking brush, sprays of dirt. Elliot whips ahead of me, the dare devil unleashed. I try to square the turn, miss the trail! I ride down a steep abyss. Working every brain cell and reflex to stay up right. I crash thru virgin brush and dodge untouched trees. My terror builds as my speed. The brakes are gone. I'm doomed, I believe! A wasted life, missing the thing I want to do and things I want to say. Regrets haze my visions, life has passed me by.
The day started nice, just the two of us; escaping the parent sullen mood. At my demand to quit school. Mistress is pissed at me, I'm tired of that shit. The Dom's and Dame's, I thought it would be my life, my relieve. I'm questioning why. All these things are currently holding back my dreams. Eliana promise to fund my dream, if she can train my Dominate need. Why do I resist a sure thing?
I worry in my mind, at things I've done, the lies, sins; Is this punishment for my life. I flash to visions in my head of Ella on the floor so cold. Is that my fate. My draw in life. The world opens into sky, I see a blue-green lake. I jump over a log and crash into paint. A big Rock slam my bike to a crumbled stop; as I fly, tumbling into the lake, as blackness takes hold of my fate.
I wake to angelic blue eyes, dragging me ashore. I wish I could speak, but she's stolen my voice. We stagger to her blanket in the shade. I see her painting, easel destroyed. The tipped over chair, chills me how close I came. I see the wreckage of my bike. How did I not die? Words she speaks, I see her mouth move. But nothing seems to catch my ears. I just stare at blue eyes perfection, soul stealer in womanly form. She touch's my chest and I want more.
She packed up the blanket, savaging the paint stuff. Leaning on her we stagger down a forest trail, to a fire road. I seem to talk; I can't hear or know what I'm saying. She blushes a very pretty shade. I tighten my grip on her shoulder. Feeling things, I've never felt. Wishing things, I never dreamed. I kiss her hair, the scent magical to me, emotions I never knew I had. Thoughts of children dance in my head.
At the Trailhead, she loads me into an ancient truck with a dented, patched camper shell. Sitting on the bench seat of the cab. I can't stand the distance between us. I undue the seat belt and lay my head in her lap. Letting my world dream away as her hand strokes my mane. Soft words seep into my mind. Words I never knew could be for me, words I cherish as I feel the deep emotions overtake me.
Suddenly Words, shake me, terrify me. I rise up and stare at her. Hearing her melodic voice. "Please take me to Seattle General?"
"He speaks? I'm Anna and you are?" she asks, pulling to the side of the road.
"Chris Grey, Christian Grey. please Anna?"
"Well since you ask so nicely, your cell phone is smashed and I couldn't find any ID. So, it an hour to the hospital. Our you sure? You could be badly injured?" she asks, pouting at corners of her mouth. I lean over a kiss her.
The electric shock of our contact, excites us both. I deepen the kiss. She pushes me back. I feel loss, hurt, pain at her rejection. "We need to get you seen, so we can try that again." she calms my frighten, my loss. Bringing a euphoria to me.
As we drive down the freeway, I lay my head in her lap. A dream away the ride as she strokes my hair, and sings to the radio tunes. This is heaven at her finger tips. Heaven in her embrace. Will she want the devil when I tell her my sins? Who wants the devil in Eden's garden?
The hospital is quiet this late afternoon as we pull into the parking lot. She helps me into the Emergency room check in. I lean on the counter while she gets a wheelchair. After forms and more forms, a nurse takes my vitals. If Anna wasn't holding my hand, I'm not sure what I would do.
Finally, a nurse takes us a room, a kid doctor not much older than me. pokes and probes me. agitating me. I don't think I'm a very patient person. After thirty minutes waiting, A nurse escorts us thru the maze of corridors to the MRI.
I panic at Anna having to leave me. The table moves me into the machine, space closes in on me. "Chris, calm down. Relax babe. I'm here. just relax." Her voice echo from the loudspeaker.
Afterwards the tech sends us back to the ER unescorted. "The Tech didn't see any swelling. How the memories?"
"There better, still fuzz. I'm hungry?" I say as my stomach rumbles.
Pushing me down the hall, she makes car motor sound, dodging the equipment in the hallways.
"Christian?" an older Nurse asks me.
"Yea, do you know me? "I ask back
"What happened?" she demands in that answer or I'll smack your knuckles with a steel ruler voice Nun voice.
"He crashed his mountain bike, hit his head, still a bit jumbled." Anna says stroking my neck. I let the touch dream me to happy thoughts.
"Does your mother know?" the nurse asks
"No. he didn't have any id, and his cell phone was smashed. We were waiting for his memory to clear" Anna barks back at the old battle axe. My protector.
"She working today. I'll page her to you in the ER." She says briskly walking away.
"That was strange, but at least your mom will be here to help you." Anna says sadly. I stare into blue eyes tinted with pain.
"Do you need to call anyone?" I ask. She shakes violently. I pull her into my lap. "Tell me what's wrong?"
"Theirs no one left. No one to call?" she hides her head in my shoulder.
"Babe, your never alone ever again. ok?"
She nods her head, kisses my lips and get off my lap to push me thru the halls to the ER. Lounging in the very uncomfortable hospital bed. I pull her into my arms. face to face, she clutches my hospital gown over my heart. I kiss her sorrows away, hoping I don't add to them. I know in my deep recess I will. It hurts me to know that without memories of my sins.
She tells me all that has happened to her. I cry with her, and kiss the sorrow away. She is mine, the world be dammed. I will do my best to see her life is happy and at peace. Her safety is my most important need. More than family, more than my company.
Xxxxxx
g-pov
Dorothy paged me, I have to finish this surgery, another hour at least. She sends in a note. Christian is in the ER head injury. No swelling. Non-urgent. I calm myself; I must finish the last of the child's operation. The poor thing was hit by a car. Idiot stoner jump a curb and hit three people. One woman and her son and this her son's best friend. The woman and her son didn't make it. I hurry to finish. I instruct someone to call Carrick.
Two hours later: Rushing from the Post-op, I enter the ER to find my husband sitting outside a room, reading a book. I look at him. He just raises a finger to his lips and nods toward the door. I peek inside and see a young couple spooning in the bed. Her hand on his back and chest. The copper hair tells me it's Christian. I gasp and back out of the door.
"How long?" I shakenly ask, as he takes me in his strong arms.
"I got here about an hour ago. The doctors were waiting on the blood work. But Christian's ok, a little bump on the head. No concussion or broken bones. Elliot is on his way back. He was searching the mountain. The rangers got word to him. He's very upset about losing Christian." Cary holds me
"when can we take him home?"
"I was waiting for you." he kisses my fear and worries away.
I stand straighten my shoulder and reenter the room. To find Christian sitting up and heated whispers with the girl. he looks at me. "Mom! I'm so glad you're here." he stands and grabs me. hugging me. weeping in my hair. My son is hugging me. I feel his love. He finally releases me. "Dad." he seems cold.
Oh' please let's not start that argument again. "We need to get you home dear. Thank you for helping him. I'm sure you're in a hurry to get back to your family?"
"Mom. Anna's coming home with me." Christian says. I look into grey eyes hard as stone. He will not bend. I look back and forth between the two. He takes her hand and walks out of the room. We follow to the parking lot. They get in a beat-up old truck with a camper shell. He looks at us. "meet you at home" they drive off leaving us flat footed and stunned. What the frigging hell just happened?
"Cary?" I ask confused and unsure.
"Come on. I'll have James from the firm, drive your car home." He takes me to his car, making calls to get my car home.
On the road I call Elliot and redirect him to the house. Pulling up I see Christian carrying a bag into the house. Following him. He takes the bag into his room. What is going on. He looks at me. smiles and closes and locks the door. I hear the shower start up. What the frigging hell is going on?
Two hours later: I sit in the great room sucking my second-tall straight vodka. I hear the front door slam and Elliot walks in. he looks about and see me and the empty glass on the side table. He walks over and takes the half full glass and walks into the kitchen. Returning with an ice water. He places it in my hand. Sitting beside me. he hugs me. I don't care he smells and needs a shower. Today has been very, very trying.
"Dad outside looking at what remains of Christians bike. I don't know how he survived with just bruise and scratchs. One luck kid. At the crash site, was a destroyed painting easel and paints. The Rangers were concerned he hit someone. But Dad said she was fine. What's going on mom?"
"their upstairs in his bed room, the two of them. The Truck is registered to a dead man. And full of stuff. I think she's homeless. I don't understand? She was touching his chest and back. He hugged me. really hugged me. what is going on, Elliot?"
"I don't know, we will just have to wait them out. I'm sure food will lure them out. have you tried that?" Elliot says as his stomach rumbles. My boy's? I get up and head into the kitchen. The oven is on, the smell is divine. I peek in; a lasagna. Who? When? I try to clear my alcohol fuzzy head.
"Well hello gorgeous, who are you?" Elliot tries his best line and smile. I turn to the brunette with blue eyes. she terrified backing away. Elliot step forwards. Than jumps back holding his hands up. "Whoa, I come in peace. I'm Elliot. Please put that away?"
I look, shaking the Alcohol cloudy brain: I see the knife in her hand, not something a petite girl like her would carry. A long-pointed dagger, I've seen something like it before. She looks terrified. I need to defuse the situation. "How long till the lasagna is ready?"
"Anna, I'm here. Elliot is not a threat. Babe put the Fairbairn away. How soon do we eat?" Christian ask coming behind her. She backs to him. Only putting the knife away when he touches her. Kissing her neck, she relaxes. "Fifteen minutes: I have to put the garlic bread in. and start the salad." Her voice is melodic and soft. This young woman looks angelic and yet the knife, speaks of violence.
"Christian, Elliot set the table. No wine. Yes, no wine with our head Christian. Can I help you with the salad my dear?"
She looks at Christian who nods. "Mom this is Anna, Anastasia Steele. She staying with me." Christian states. We are having a talk, after dinner. for sure!
"Anna can I help?"
"Sure Mrs. Grey, the salad is mostly chopped in the frig. I was going to make the vinaigrette." She moves only after Elliot leaves the room. She is wary, skittish. I watch her pull out the prepped bread and insert it in the oven. I get the salad out and begin to mix. I watch her quick and easily make the dressing. She hums and dances about my kitchen.
At the table, conversation flies light and playful. I'm amazed at Christian demeanor. So happy and easy going. I know Mia is going to be very upset she missed this. After the argument Thursday; I sent her to my parent's farm. I watch the girl. quiet, very quiet. But when ask her words are sure and concise. She argues with Cary on a recent Supreme Court case. She is smart, poised and very mature. A very strange mix.
After dinner, she washes the dishes then load the machine without any prompting. She starts every time someone comes around her. Only Christian doesn't startle her. Sitting in the great room, Christian pulls her onto his lap, cradling her against his chest. I nearly scream in jealousy. I've waited years to hug him. She done it in a day.
"Christian? What happened?" Cary asks.
"I misjudged the turn, slide off the road. Down a very steep grade. I honestly don't know how I survived. I don't think I was even on a trail. The brakes burned out. I saw the lake. Jumped over a log and crash down on Anna painting. Just missed her, destroyed her painting, easel, paint box. Which her dad made for her. Crashed into a big ass rock a catapulted in the lake." Christian says. Then whispers into her ears.
"It's ok, Chris you didn't mean to destroy it. I can get another one." Anna clams him
"yea, but your dad made that for you. A he can never make another one. I know you've lost so much. But now you're here with me, us. Ok?" he wipes her tears away.
I wonder what that means. "I suspect the truck was her fathers?" Cary whispers in my ear. I realize that is exactly what Christian meant. "Your family Anna? Do you need to call someone?"
"NO!" she barks, hiding her face deeper in Christian embrace. He Glares at me. "I'm her family now. If it's a problem speak now." He challenges us.
"If she staying, she needs to be in a guest room." Cary says
"After she's settled, then she will move into her own room." Christian states.
"Christian, your going back to school Tuesday."
"No! I'm not. I'm dropping out and starting my company. I hope you can lend me the capital. I really hope you have faith in me to back me. because I'm going to do it. after this morning, I realized I can't please everyone, or do things I know are holding me back." He pleads with us.
"If you Drop out Christian, your cut off!" Carrick states
"Ok. We'll leave in the morning. Sorry you feel that way about me. I will miss you all." He says getting up and they leave. just like that no argument, no begging. Just silence, I look at my husband. He's stunned his bluff failed and driven our son away.
"Dad. that was the stupidest thing I've ever seen you do. You know once he out the door, he's never coming back. Ever? Do you really want to do this? "Elliot yells and leaves the room.
We stare at each other. I stand unsure of my balance. Holding out my hand, we walk down to the lake. Sitting on the bench near the dock. I hold him. "I want to loan him the money."
"Grace he'll be back in a week tops."
"No, he won't. maybe before Anna. But now, he won't be back, or contact us."
"Gracie's, we have to be strong, set rules. If I back down now he'll never obey or respect us?"
"Cary, your wrong. We're to close; to vested in our positions. Call Lloyd, your partner asks him?"
He takes his cell phone and calls. A heated exchange, as I cuddle into him for warmth. He throws his phone in the lake.
"Fine. You win. We will loan him the money, allow him to stay here and her as well. But their will be rules and consequences if he fails in this company of his." Cary states then weeps in my arms. I hold my fragile husband, everyone including the kids think he's a pillar of strength and determination. But I know the scared inner man. Always worried about being a father and husband: failing like his parents and grandparents.
Xxxxxxx
I watch from our bedroom door. Cary knocks on Christians door. Christian open and steps in the hall. Heated words, then a handshake. He returns to me, my embrace. Latter after some stress sex. We cuddle. "you were right. He's locked his mind to what he wants." I kiss him. "Sleep, tomorrow will be better."
Strange dreams haunt me. for some reason Eliana keeps yelling at me to be cruel and harsh to Christians dreams. She been the last year very mean about my being soft on Christian and his studies. I keep seeing Anna laughing at me, taunting me to accept my son as he is, not how I what him to be. I chase him thru unending corridors and doors always one step behind. Always one step too late. I reach a door, opening it: I stand in a field of wild flowers along the sky-blue Sound. Under a vivid summer Sun. I see Christian and Anna with a young boy. I walk up to the copper hair min-Christian with enormous laughing blue eyes. they look at me, "Daddy do you have a mommy and daddy too?" I look at Christian sad face. "No, I don't. I did once. But they threw me away. Now its just us. You me, mommy and blip." He rubs Anna stomach. I try to yell but they can't hear me, see me. I've lost my son. I stare in a mirror. The reflection is Ella. Have I become his birth mother in his mind and eyes?
I wake sweat soaked to a worried Cary. "It's alright, I've got you. I've got you." he chants to me. I remember the sadness in Christian eyes in the dream, I've seen it before. Tears rush to puddles in my lap. The eyes of the four-year-old in the ER bay. Clutching a dirty patch of blue blanket. The soulfully eyes of one who has nothing to live for, or die for. alone. Destroyed by the ones who should have loved him, protected him. Cherished him. I will never let that nightmarish dream become reality. I will never see that look in my son's eyes ever again.
Dawn finds me worried about today. What will it bring?
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Walking into the kitchen to start Cary coffee and make my morning tea. The oven is on? The coffee machine is dripping, and my electric kettle is ready to pour. My tea pot is on the counter. I check? My tea is in the bottom. I pour in the hot water. Looking about I see a box on the far counter. I head towards it, I stop at the oven to peek. What ever it is? it smells delicious.
The box is a tea set. Fine China in a custom build box. Beautifully crafted and carved. The lid is a relief of a young girl dancing. With Anastasia name scrolled around the dancing girl. The set is amazing, not something a homeless waif would have.
"OH Grace, your up. I was just showing Anna the laundry and where the supplies are." Angie, our housekeeper speaks. I turn, see her and Anna. The girl is smiling, which drops into stoic face at my gaze.
Angie see the tension. "Anna made a frittata for us. The boys left a little while ago, Christian said they have an errand and then Elliot's getting Mia." I look back and forth between them, unsure how to processed.
"Why don't you Girls take your tea to the great room, while I get the table set." Angie speaks breaking the silence. Anna take a tea cup, pours the water and takes a tea bag from a box next to the case. I didn't see it. she dips the bag a couple of times then dumps it in the trash. She heads to the great room. I follow. Sitting on the sofa we watch the changing light. What do I say?
"Anna? What are your plans?"
She looks into her tea, takes a sip. Looks me in the eyes. "Christian wants me to go back to school, finish it. I'm not sure, I left at the start of my freshman year."
"what college?" I ask, she shakenly put the cup and saucer on the side table. Folds her hands on her lap. I see the blood forced from her death grip on her hand.
"I have not been to college yet." She forces the words out of her mouth.
"Anna how old are you?" I demand, afraid of the answer. What have we allowed.
"Fifteen." She looks down at her hands. She won't raise her head. I fume, my mind clouds over.
"YOUR FIFTEEN, AND SLEEPING WITH MY ALMOST NINETEEN-YEAR-OLD SON! OUR YOU NUTS, SEEING HIM AS A _!"
"GRACE! THERE IS A PHONE CALL IN MY OFFICE FOR YOU!" Carrick screams over me. I look at him.
"GRACE! NOW! MY OFFICE" I'm stunned at his tone and intimated by his command. I rise and head into his office, he follows. I turn and Carrick walks in forcing me back into a chair. Leaning both hand on the arms.
"Shut up! Listen to me! get your head out of your ASS. You will not talk to her like that again. Am I clear!" he intimidates me. he's seldom every done this. My anger fades under his stern gaze.
"The more you stress Anna; the longer it's going to take to get her in her own room. They are not having sex. You understand me. The more afraid of us, the more Christian will isolate." I struggle to understand the words.
"how can you be sure?" I ask
"Christian explain several things last night. Anna is fragile, body and mind. Think like the brilliant doctor I know you are. What do her reactions and symptoms say?" he commands, still leaning on the arms. pinning me in the seat. What is he talking about?
I think back to everything she done, said, reacted. I feel my tear running down my face as the reality strikes me. I'm a trained pediatric doctor. Anna has all the symptoms of long term abuse victim. Her reaction to Elliot and Carrick. Even me. I've been a jealous bitch, close minded and cruel in how I've reacted to her. Carrick shifts me to his lap as we switches places.
Wiping my tears, he kisses me back to balance. "I talked to your father this morning. He's going to talk to Judge Wilson. Get a writ of guardianship for Anna. Also changing her last name to Trevelyan"
"Why change her name?"
"Her step father was murder over a year ago. I believe Anna's version: That her mother's third husband did it. He abused of Anna at ten for seven months. Put him in jail till two months before the killing."
"What evidence? Would make you believe this; has she told you?" I ask shaken that he's gone behind my back. Started a relationship with Anna.
"No, Christian talked to me. I made some calls, discreet. Anna step father, her birth father died the day after she was born. Her step father and VFW buddy were driving back from early morning fishing trip. They were forced off the road and shot at close range with a shotgun. Anna mother called her: telling her that her step father was dead. She heard her father scream then gunshots. She told the police. They don't believe her. The two have alibis, I will tear them apart."
"Why the name change?"
"Because that evil bitch told her, she owed stepfather #3 for prison. A making her marry another man to survive. These evil shits are hunting her." He tells me. everything makes sense now. Then the reality of her age take hold. She been homeless traveling off the grid since she was thirteen.
The stress of her step father's death, no family. No one to help her with all the things that would mean. Keep her safe. I will do everything make her safe, and wanted. Her birth mother is a waste. I will make her know what a mother is like. I will do better by her.
"Ok. I understand. I will be the mother she needs and deserves, but I just can't see her like that." I honestly tell him.
"Can you see her as our daughter-in-law. Because that is what she is. I have no doubts at the earliest moment Christian will marry her." Carrick talks. I see the reality of our near future. I kiss him.
A knock on the door. Angie sticks her head in. "Breakfast is ready. Clean up and come to the table."
We head to the downstairs bathroom, clean up, wiping my eyes. I look in the mirror and remember last nights dream.
Walking into the kitchen breakfast bar. I take the girl by surprise, hugging her. Kissing her hair. "Anna, please forgive me. I was a scared jealous bitch. I want you to trust me, and feel welcome here in our home. I will do everything to make you safe and loved."
She shakes at my word. After a bit she hugs me back. And smiles at me. I release her so we can eat. She takes me at my words relaxing light heartily teasing me about Carrick and Christian Coffee fetish. Her laughter is heart warming and makes me feel good. She is a diamond, Christian has found the perfect woman for him. She just oozes compassion and unconditional love.
As the morning goes by I get her working on how to set up her room. I tell her it will be when she ready to move there. She doesn't argue that this will happen. She knows it will make things better. She is a simple, brilliant, natural young lady. I can easily see how she caught Christian heart.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Elliot-pov
Christian and dad wake me before dawn. He tells us about Anna being hunted. I fume at the abuse and hate she has endured. I can see what a sweet caring compassionate person she is.
Having her yesterday draw a knife on me. I remember the guy hiking back to the crash site with me; how when he first became my brother. He'd sleep with a steak knife, till he relaxed and accepted us.
Arriving at the crash site. Christian immediately began collecting the destroyed painting easel. I can see the precision joint and master craftsman. "Christian it's cool your collecting trash, all ecology and such, but why?"
"Her dad made this. I'm going to have another one made, I hope they can use some of the wood. Look the bottom shelf is intact and some of the paint chest side look useable" Christian says.
I help; finding a canvas, laying it on a rock. I'm stunned this is brilliant painting despite the tire track thru the middle. Christian walks over taking a look. "I feel even worse seeing that. she is so talented. She tells me she sells them thru an art dealer. She was getting a hundred a painting."
"Bullshit! That Art dealer is clearly taking advantage of her. This is thousands of dollars even destroyed. We are going to visit that asshole." I say upset at how many people have taken advantage of her.
"We will let Dad and Grandpa deal with it. Don't want Anna outed." Christian says, but I see his eyes are rage filled.
"how are you going to find someone to do this?" pointing at the trash bag.
"Ask Mr. Jordan." Christian says
"our old Shop teacher at Prep?" he nods, we head out to our old high school to see the woodworking teacher.
Two hours later; at Seattle Preparatory High School in the shop department, Mr. Jorden exams the wreckage.
"This is master craftsman work. It can't be rebuilt, I'm sorry."
"I know that, I was hoping someone could make another one, using as much of the wood a possible. Her father made this just for her. He's past away." Christian pleas, I seldom see him like this. The girl means the world to him.
Mr. Jordan looks over the wood, picking up a piece. "This is Ray Steele work." His face pales. He walks away a wipe his eyes. a few moments later he walks back.
"You knew him?" I ask
"Yes, brilliant man, master craftsman. Was an officer in the Army during the first Gulf war. His death was tragic, I wondered what happened to his daughter, beautifully girl. James Thornhill, lives out near your Grandfather farm. He's the one who can and will do this for her. I'll call. Get you an introduction Christian. "
"I'm going that way, Christian has to get back home. You'll keep this quiet. The people who did her father are still hunting her." I say with his nod. I know he will keep quiet, he's a trusted friend to me. Christian, I had to tutor thru his class.
We head out, I drop Christian at home. Heading east to drop off the wood and pickup Mia. How Anna will react to the hyperactive Mia. I will have to tone her down, don't want Anna popping that knife on her.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Christian-pov
I find Anna helping about the house. She seems happy. Dad calls me into his study. We talk about everything working out the details. I show him the ruined canvas. He agrees the art dealer is stealing Anna talent. He will get a friend in Tacoma to take on the Art dealer.
He pours a finger of whiskey, hands it to me. we talk man to man like we have never done. For the first time, he treats me as an adult. Laying out the things and goals for my future. He hands me a box, it's Great grandma Trevelyan wedding and engagement rings. "When the time is right. We would be happy if you used these." He tells me, hugging me. I hug him back and finally feel the unconditional love he has for me.
I head to my room, to proof and print my business plan. I have two companies I can take within thirty days. I work the numbers, the pro and cons of each company. I head down stairs to confer with dad. I see Anna reading under the great window. Legs tuck up under her. An afghan quilt over one shoulder. A tea cup next to her on the side table. I shudder, nearly tripping at the angelic picture she makes.
She sees my clumsy move. A Smile lights the room, my heart soars at the emotions. Emotions she can induce with just a smile. Turning into Dad study, "Dad" the word means so much more. I always called him Carrick, from the first words I spoke.
Now I can only think and say the simple word that lights his whole being. I see pride and love. I feel pride he calls me son. I deserve it, I am worthy. Worthy? The words crash down on me. everything I've done the last four years.
Sitting, "Dad there is something, I have to confess. I don't know if this will change things. I hope not. Really hope so?"
"Son, you can tell me anything. I may rant and scream, but it will not change our deal, about your company and Anna. Please tell me?"
I rise and crawl into his arms, head on his shoulder and confess my sickly deviant sex live with Eliana. He shakes and cries with me. I ask him not to tell Mom. he says she has to know, but not right now. Asking if Anna knows. I nod. He hugs me tighter.
"you realize she abused you, manipulated you, and us. She's been feed us a steady diet of being harder, more demanding of you. That you're not the only boy she's abused. Predatory like her are never satisfied with one victim."
I realize her words were just that, isolating me, making me feel special. I now realize she used and abused me. feeding on my self-loathing. I need my world. "I Understand." Getting off his lap. I wipe my tear red eyes. "Can we do the business plan tomorrow. I need Anna right now" he nods. Grasping my hand, squeezing it; the compassion I see in his eyes.
Walking out into the Great Room. I crawl up into Anna lap. Hiding my face in her stomach. She strokes my head. As I tell her I confessed. She leans down, taking my face in her hands. Kissing my fears away. I feel sleepy, like the world has suddenly left my shoulders. I fall to sleep in her enticing scent of tea and Anna's apple scented lotion.
I feel someone crawl over me, worming under me. I wake, rise up to have Mia smack my ass. "stay down. I'm Mia. Lug-head here's sister. Your Anna Christian fiancée. I hope we can be friends, sisters. Elliot warned me to no go all hyper on you guys. I'll save that for later, maybe shopping this weekend."
"Mia?" I ask, my head still on Anna lap. As Mia starts tickling my feet and knees. I'm forced to wiggle off the couch to the floor. As Mia scoots next to Anna. Leaning in conspirators, giggling like she should always be. Happy and carefree. I rise to go look up Elliot.
I find him in the kitchen slurping down a jaw defying hoagie. Angie is laughing at the mess he's making. Mom enters, I throw my arm around her shoulder, pulling her tight to me. watching Elliot's second bite. The Hoagie is half gone. We laugh, and I feel apart of this mad family.
Eight days later:
g-pov
Once I got my head out of my ass. Anna has proven to be a smart, beautiful, young woman, inside and out. A few bumps, this week. Anna is very concerned to not tarnish our public image. I can remember her refusal to go shopping. Sitting rocking on their bed. Knees under chin, Christian had a quiet word.
"Mom, Mia. She doesn't have any cloths to go shopping; at the stores you told her you be shopping at. Maybe Mia has something she can borrow?" I have to shake my head. The whole purpose to go cloth shopping; is to get good cloths. Mia has already bolt for her overcrowded closet.
"Grace? could I talk to you for a minute? I need somethings from the grocery." Angie ask me. we retreat to the hallway near the stairs.
"Grace, she doesn't want to embarrass you. by being so obvious poor. She doesn't want you having to explain her, if you run into friends. Let Mia find something. you are going to find out she's not Mia like in cloths or shopping." She hugs me. I realize her words are right, she was thinking about me, us. Not herself. I head back. "Oh yea, get more spring mix salad greens." Angie teases from the stairs.
That night:
Angie was dead on. Anna got good quality, simple clean lines outfits. Never going wild or even overboard. She mostly got jean, graphic t-shirts, causal cloths, nice multiuse dresses. Just four shopping bags. Mia just getting a few things had six bags. I to my shame had three bags. I got a very nice skirt and cashmere turtleneck sweater, Cary will sweat looking at me in it.
I sip a nice cocktail with my man, watching the kids play Risk on the floor. Laughing and teasing, happy I am nearly in tears had how much I miss this scene. How much I love my children and my future daughter-in-law.
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Day eight:
g-pov
I stare at the packet Dad has just laid out for Anna. I get the strange feeling that this is not the first time, he's done this. He's gotten Anna, state ID card, social security card, birth certificate, passport and Border card, school transcripts. And a public guardianship of Rose Anna Trevelyan. The real guardianship of Anastasia Rose Steele is court approved and sealed. Hiding Anna from the evils hunting her.
I kiss him. "Dad your amazing. I'm not going to ask. But thank you. I have a hard time seeing how you did all this, I mean you're a civil engineer?"
"Gracie, baby. Its all about the friends you have and keep. Particularity the political and bureaucratic. The school transcripts are iff's" dad hugs me.
"I've got a contact in the School District Administration. She should be able to help us get Anna back in school. She tearing thru are library like Mia shops" I laughing tell him. "You'd better head home before it gets too late, or do you want to crash here?"
"No. I'll head out, can't let any random traveling salesman steal my girl. Take care, she's a sweet girl. don't let anyone change that." he kisses my hair, ruffes my hair. Walks out to his car. I return back to the great room. Christian and Anna are cuddled on the floor near the couch. Anna's reading a classical thick English tome. Christian is typing away on his laptop.
Sitting I smile at the scene. Mia on the couch reading a biography on Coco Channel, not fashion magazine. Elliot hunched over the chess board with Carrick. The Anna effect is seeping into us. I have to calm my inner grizzly after Carrick and Dad explained Christian's rape and abuse by Eliana. I want to leave the house and rip her hair out, then rip her frigging head off and shove it up her evil cu #$$t.
But looking about the room, makes me let all the evil go for now. Just letting the family good mood and emotions of love; soothe my mind. I relax, picking up my medical journal. I begin reading on the CDC's measles and whooping cough epidemic in the USA.