Chapter Thirty Seven

Two days later

Evelyn woke up feeling the same joyful apprehension she had for the last couple of mornings. Her hand drifted to her stomach and she smiled contentedly, imagining the life growing in there. Trying to imagine if it was going to be a boy or a girl. Whether it was going to look like her or Joe. She felt so happy that not even the gentle pattering of rain on the tarpauling above her head was enough to dissolve it. She turned her head to see Liebgott wide awake watching her with complete adoration in his eyes, and she was glad that Eugene had offered to swap cots with him for the foreseeable future. However long her future with Easy was for anyway. She and Liebgott had last night decided that they would bask in their secret happiness for another day or two before breaking the news to the CO's. And after that their fate was uncertain.

"Hi," he grinned at her. "How did you sleep?"

"Well," she grinned back, thinking that he looked so adorable with his hair all messy from sleeping. "Although the sooner I can sleep in a real bed the better. This cot does nothin' for my back. I'm in agony this mornin'."

"You are?" Liebgott frowned in concern.

Evelyn nodded. Her lower back was killing her and her stomach felt strange. The joys of being pregnant, she mused to herself. Seeing Liebgott's worried face, she smiled reassuringly.

"I'll be fine," she promised him. "Once I get up and about, it'll ease somewhat."

"Even so, just stay here for a few minutes more so I can keep on staring at you," Liebgott smirked. He stretched his hand across the gap between their cots to reach for hers, and she took it, intertwining her fingers with his own.

"Oh Perco, would you look at this," Johnny Martin suddenly spoke. "Loves young dream."

"Pass me the sick bucket, quick," Perconte snorted.

"At least they're not fighting today," Skinny chuckled. "In fact, by my reckoning it's been four or five days since any altercation. Must be a new record."

"I reckon they only fight so they can have the fun of making up again anyway," Perconte said, which gathered a laugh from everyone.

Even Evelyn and Liebgott found their teasing chatter amusing. A little bit of senseless ribbing didn't bother them. Nothing could bother them. They were in their own deliriously little happy bubble and no one could burst it.

"Aw Frank, you caught onto our secret," Evelyn sat up and began pulling on her boots. "But what you don't know is that we made up in your cot."

The cot beside Perconte's creaked as Bull guffawed loudly at the little Italian's grimace. With a grin, Evelyn stood up and reached for her jacket. Sure, the weather was warming but there was still a nip in the air first thing in the morning.

"Speaking of beds," Frank grimaced. "You might wanna check your own."

Evelyn frowned as Frank motioned vaguely in the direction of her cot, a blush appearing on his cheeks.

"What Perconte's too embarrassed to tell you is that your monthly visitor seems to have arrived, and she wanted to make sure we all knew about it," Martin explained.

Evelyn ripped the blanket from her cot and her eyes widened in horror when she saw a small patch of dark blood on the canvas bed.

"Joe," she let out a sob, slapping her hand over her mouth and bursting into tears.

"Ssh, it's alright," Liebgott was already up, his boots on his feet. He cupped her face and forced her eyes to meet his. "Doc's in the aid station. We'll go and see him and I'm sure it'll all be fine."

He tied his jacket around her waist, hiding the stain on the rear of her trousers from view and took her gently by the arm.

"I'm scared," she whispered.

"I know," he kissed her head. "But it'll be fine. You'll see."

"Jesus Christ, anyone would think she's dying," Frank muttered to himself as Lieb hurriedly led Evelyn from the tent. "It's only a bit of blood."

"You're a fine one to talk," Skinny raised an eyebrow at him. "Do you not recall the aggravation you gave me when I got blood all over your trousers in Bastogne?"

"That's different," Frank smirked. "I wouldn't have cared if it was my own blood."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, Perco."

….

"Liebgott, just try and calm down," Eugene said for the third time in as many minutes. Although he was fairly certain that his words were falling on deaf ears.

Lighting up a cigarette, Liebgott sucked on it as though it was giving him oxygen. His leg bobbed up and down furiously as they waited for the doctor to come out and speak with them. All kinds of thoughts and feelings were running through his head. He wanted nothing more than to be with Evelyn, but at the same time he didn't. It made no sense, but he knew that if he was with her he wouldn't be able to keep himself together.

Eugene watched Liebgott, feeling a great deal of sympathy for the man and what he was be going through at that moment. Liebgott's turmoil must have a been a thousand times greater than Eugene's own.

When Evelyn and Liebgott had turned up at the aid station in a state of panic just under an hour ago, it had taken Eugene a few minutes to get out of them the reason for their obvious distress. Evelyn hadn't been able to even string a sentence together. She was like a rabbit caught in the headlights. She had just stood unblinkingly, not reacting to anything he asked her.

As soon as Liebgott had told him about the bleeding, a horrible gnawing feeling had immediately began chewing away at Eugene's gut. Coupled with the fact that Liebgott mentioned how Evelyn had described having a sore back when she woke up, there was extra cause for concern. Eugene had reassured them both that it was most likely nothing to worry about, but he was hardly an expert in these matters. One thing Eugene knew was that he was always able to rely on his gut instinct. It rarely failed him. In this instance, however, he would be happy to prove himself wrong.

Doing the only thing he could think of, he had gotten Evelyn settled into bed and hurriedly sought out Major Winters. After a brief explanation, it was obvious that Major Winters was more than a little surprised to hear that Evelyn was pregnant. Surprised and also somewhat annoyed. Despite that, his concern was just as great as Eugene's. When Eugene had asked for permission to drive into the town for Doctor Chopain, Winters had refused and instead insisted that Eugene stay with Evelyn. Major Winters would collect the doctor himself.

It had been half an hour now since the Doctor had gone in to examine Evelyn, asking Eugene and Liebgott to wait outside the room. Thirty long minutes that had felt like thirty hours.

When the door finally creaked open and Doctor Chopain's tall form stepped through it, his face was serious. He looked at Liebgott gravely, and they immediately knew it was not good news.

Liebgott put his hands in his head and took a deep breath. He didn't need to hear what the Doctor was going to say. He didn't want to hear it.

"Is she alright?" Eugene asked him in French.

"No," the doctor answered honestly, feeling sympathy for the young medic he had left crying. "But she will be."

"Has the baby… Is it…?" Eugene wasn't sure how to phrase the question.

"The foetus passed only moments after I went in there," Dr Chopain nodded matter of factly.

Eugene swallowed the lump in his throat at the doctor's blunt words.

"Do you want me to tell him?" he motioned to Liebgott with his head.

"No," Eugene answered straight away. "I'll tell him."

"Very well," the doctor said. "I'll be back to check on her tonight."

"What do I need to do to make sure she's ok in the meantime?"

"Keep an eye on the bleeding. If it becomes too dark or too heavy, then send for me and I will come. If not, I will be back to check on her tonight and in the morning. But most of all, be her friend," the doctor patted him on the shoulder. "And be his."

With a sad tilt of his head, the doctor left.

Eugene looked at Liebgott, wondering how he was going to break this devastating news to him.

"You don't have to say it," Liebgott looked at him. His jaw was clenched, and Eugene could see that he was trying his hardest to hold back his emotions. "In fact, I'd prefer it if you didn't. I don't need to understand what that quack was saying to know that there isn't a baby anymore."

"I'm sorry," Eugene mumbled. He didn't know what else to say. "I'm going to go and check on Evelyn. Are you coming with me?"

Liebgott shook his head and swallowed. He didn't trust himself to say another word for fear that he would crumble into pieces and cry right there and then. He couldn't go in there and see Evelyn. What was he supposed to say to her? How was he supposed to even look at her? He didn't understand how in the space of just one hour things could have gone from being so exciting and happy to feeling like the world had ended?

"I need some air," he muttered, his chair scraping loudly against the floor as he stood up.

As Liebgott's figure disappeared out of sight, Eugene took a deep breath. He was reluctant to go in there and see Evelyn, especially given that the one person she would probably want wasn't with him. But what other choice did he have?

….

Evelyn squeezed her eyes shut as pain radiated through body. Not just the physical pain caused by menstrual like cramps that started in the small of her back and radiated around to her abdomen. No, the emotional agony was just as bad, if not worse.

She leant over and vomited into the bowl on the small bedside table as she thought about the moment her body had expelled the baby growing inside her. Doctor Chopain had just arrived when she felt something in between her legs. She couldn't explain it. It felt like she needed to pass urine but also as though there was some sort of lump waiting to pass as well. When she had begun to panic and explained this to the doctor, he had been forced to reveal what his suspicions were. Doctor Chopain had asked her to empty her bladder in a chamber pot and when she felt the lump pass with a thud in the bottom of the pot, she had known immediately what it was. A quick inspection from the doctor had confirmed it. And that was it. The moment her world had come crashing down forever.

With the back of a shaking hand, she wiped the bile from her mouth and lay back down on the bed. She felt blood leaking from in between her legs, serving a constant reminder of her loss. She wanted to scream or cry but she couldn't. She felt numb. Like she was in a dream.

Every few seconds, she would think herself a hypocrite for being so upset when less than a week before she hadn't even wanted the baby. What right did she have to play the grieving mother? But as quick as that thought came, it would be replaced with another thought. The thought that from the very second she had decided she was going to keep the baby she had been overwhelmed by a love so intense that consumed her completely. How was it possible to love something that didn't even truly exist so much that losing it felt like the end of the world?

"Evelyn?"

She couldn't even gather the tiny amount of energy needed to open her eyes and glance up towards the sound of Eugene's voice. A small ray of light welcome in the darkness that her life had become in the space of less than an hour.

"Evelyn," he stepped closer towards the bed and she felt him sit down tentatively on the end of it. "Please tell me you're alright?"

But she couldn't. The girl who was always ready with a fake smile in any circumstance was gone. She couldn't try and pretend for even one second. Not right now.

"Where's Joe?" she whispered.

"He, uh, needed some air," Eugene answered truthfully. "But he'll be back soon. Don't you worry about that."

She nodded. She clenched her jaw as a pain ripped through her back and she wanted to cry out because it hurt so much. It was sharp yet dull at the same time. The room was silent apart from the sound of the two of them breathing in sync.

Eugene could have cried as he watched her. The grief on her face was indescribable. He wished he could take it away from her. All he could think about in that moment was his Vera. What if this happened to them one day when they started trying for a family? Women lost babies. It was just something that happened. Yet he had never actually really known anyone in this situation. As a child, he would overhear his grandmother talking about women who had come to see her when they lost their babies. How they would beg for her to take their grief away. They would beg for her to bring back the babies they longed for so much. Yet his youthful mind had never been able to properly comprehend the level of despair they must have felt. But seeing the only other woman that he loved as much as his wife or family in such agony really got to him.

"Doctor Chopain told me that it was Major Winters who came for him," she muttered, her voice croaky. "I'm guessin' he aint too happy with me right now?"

"I had to tell him," Eugene said. "I didn't know what else to do."

"I know," she nodded. "I wouldn't have expected you to do any different. I didn't exactly put you in an easy situation, did I?"

"When do you ever?" he smirked.

A miniscule smile played at the corners of her mouth. Although it disappeared as quickly as it came.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, taking her hand.

"Like crap," her bottom lip wobbled and she squeezed his hand, more as a comfort to herself than to him though. "I'm just so confused. Since I found out I was…" she couldn't say the word. It hurt too much. "…Since this whole thing started, everything has been so up and down. One minute I was upset, then I was happy and now… now, I hurt more than I ever knew was possible."

"That's only natural," Eugene said.

"I guess," she shrugged. She sighed. "Gene, would you do me a favour?"

"Of course," Eugene promised. "Anything."

"Will you talk to George and Babe for me?" she asked. "Tell them what's happened. I don't wanna have to do it myself."

"If that's what you want," Eugene reassured her.

"Thank you," she squeezed his hand again. "And one more thing? Will you find Joe and ask him to come here? I just… I really need him here."

"No problem," Eugene nodded, standing up. "Why don't you close your eyes and try and get some rest, huh? And when you wake up, Liebgott will be right here. Before I find him, I need to report to Major Winters and let him know how you are. Is there anything you would like me to tell him?"

"Please don't kick me out?" she joked. "You think he'll let me stay if I ask nicely?"

Eugene looked at her sadly. Unfortunately, they both knew the outcome of this situation.

"Don't worry yourself about it Gene," she patted his hand. "What's done is done. Can't change it now, can I?"

"I guess not," Eugene sighed, wishing with all of his heart that he had the power to change it. He leant down and kissed Evelyn on the forehead, blinking back tears. Tears of sadness for what his friend was going through, and tears of sadness that he was soon going to lose her.

….

The house was dark and the wind was howling. The trees outside cast menacing claw like shadows on the walls. In one of the upstairs bedrooms, a baby was crying.

Creeping up the wooden staircase, Evelyn tiptoed down the hallway until she reached the room that the crying was coming from. The room was empty. There was no furniture and not even any carpet. The bare floorboards were damp and moulding. However, in the far corner of the room there was a tiny bassinet.

As she edged closer, the crying became louder. Peering inside the bassinet, she noted a fluffy white blanket. The baby inside it couldn't be seen. She picked up the bundle that weighed less than a bag of sugar and tried to calm the crying baby down.

"Ssh, shh," she soothed, smiling when the baby immediately ceased its noise.

With one hand cradling the squirming infant against her chest, she used the other hand to push the blanket away from its face.

She screamed. The baby was blue. Its skin cold and mottled.

"You killed her."

She turned around.

"Joe," she gasped.

"You killed our baby," he stared at her coldly.

"No," she shook her head.

"Yes," he stepped forward menacingly. "You did this. And I can never forgive you."

"Joe please," she sobbed.

"Murderer!"

Evelyn sat up with a start, crying out. Her heart was racing, thudding against her chest and she was sweating. The dream had felt so real and so vivid. Just like the dreams she had after Henry had died.

She tried to calm herself down, to tell herself that she had nothing to feel guilty for. But the truth was that the dream only mirrored her feelings.

"Ev?"

Her gaze flitted across the small room. She hadn't noticed Liebgott curled up in the uncomfortably small chair. As he yawned and stretched his arms, he stood and came towards her.

"Are you alright?"

She put her hand to her mouth, letting out a sob as she tried to rid her mind of the image of the dead baby in her arms.

"Ssh, it's alright," Liebgott brushed her hair back from her face and kissed her head. He held her tight and rocked her against him as she cried. "Come on, it's alright."

"No it's not," she snapped, pushing him away. "It's not alright."

"Ev, you need to-"

"-What? Calm down?"

"Well yeah," Liebgott nodded. "The stress isn't good for you."

"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard," she laughed dryly. "It doesn't matter how stressed or not I am now, does it? It's not like I've got a baby to take care of anymore."

"Evelyn," Liebgott sighed.

"Don't Evelyn me," she growled. "I don't know you can stand to even be here with me."

"What are you talking about?"

"I killed our baby," she screamed. "I did this."

"You didn't do this," he tried to reason with her, but it was obvious she was so far gone with emotion that she wasn't going to listen. "What happened wasn't your fault."

"How can you say that?" she yelled. "Only a few days ago, I was sat in a toilet cubicle trying to drink a bottle of whiskey in the hopes that I would kill our unborn baby. What kind of a person tries to do that?"

"But you didn't do it," he argued with her.

"But what if this is God's way of punishing me? What if he He's punishing me because I thought about doing it? Because I tried to do it?" she cried. "You need to go."

"What?" Liebgott frowned. He glanced around, ready to dart out of the door and get Eugene because he could see that she was losing control of herself.

"Get out," she spat.

"Ev, I'm not going anywhere," he took her head.

"Get your fuckin' hands off me!" she screamed, yanking her hands away. "I killed our baby!"

The guttural scream that left her body pierced Liebgott right to the core. She began hammering his chest like a woman possessed as she screamed again and again.

"Evelyn, calm down," Liebgott grabbed her hands, restraining them.

"Leave me alone!" she shouted.

"Calm the fuck down right now," Liebgott grabbed her face, forcing her to meet his eyes. He didn't care that he was hurting her. She had to listen to him. She stopped fighting the second she saw the fury in his eyes. "You listen to me and you listen well. You did not kill our baby and God is not punishing you. You had no control over this. You are hurting right now, and I understand that you want to blame yourself so that you feel like there is a reason as to why this happened. But there is no reason. Women lose babies. That is a fact of life. A horrible fact, but one nonetheless. You are just one of those unfortunate women. I won't stand by and let you dig yourself into a pit of guilt over this."

"I can't help it," she sobbed. "I don't know how to make it stop. I just want it to stop."

"Ssh, come on," Joe kissed her forehead. "I know this hurts, baby. But you've gotta believe me when I tell you this isn't your fault. Are you listening? Yeah? Good. We'll get through this, me and you. I promise you it won't always hurt like this."

"How am I so lucky to have you?" she whispered, a tear running down her cheek and onto his hand that was still squeezing her face. "I've let you down and you're still here, tryin' to make me feel better just like you always do."

"You haven't let me down," his face softened along with his grip. "And I'm here, because I love you and here, with you, is where I belong. "

With the back of his hand, he wiped away the tears from her cheeks and kissed her gently.

"I love you," she sniffed. "I'm sorry."

"Don't you dare say that," he ordered her, clenching his jaw in a bid to stop himself from crying. He had to be strong for Evelyn. If she saw the depth of his pain, she would just continue to blame herself. Therefore, he needed to hold his emotions in the best he could. "You don't ever need to be sorry."

"But I am," she sobbed. "A Mom is supposed to look after their child, and I didn't."

The sobs that tore through her body rendered her incapable of even thinking about anything else. She buried her face in Liebgott's chest, taking comfort in his smell and the warmth of his arms around her. She cried and cried, until she could cry no more. Until she cried herself into a deep sleep. Still holding her sleeping form against his chest, he shifted them so that they both lay down on the bed. Evelyn stirred but soon drifted back off when he rubbed her back soothingly.

It was only when he was certain that she was definitely fast asleep that he allowed himself to release the tears he had been holding back himself.

…

The next morning

The doctor had stopped by in the evening to check on Evelyn, and again in the morning. He was satisfied that the bleeding was normal and advised her to get some more rest and let her body recover from its ordeal. Not that rest was easy in coming. Every time she closed her eyes to try and sleep, the same nightmare replayed over and over in her head. Liebgott had slept terribly beside her, listening to her pitiful moans and feeling her jerking in her sleep.

Once Doctor Chopain left that morning, Eugene had been forced to tell Evelyn that Colonel Sink wanted to see her to discuss the previous day's events. Liebgott had tensed up as soon as Eugene had uttered the words, yet strangely Evelyn felt no apprehension. For days she had worried about telling the CO's she was pregnant and the disapproval she was going to receive, but now nothing could hurt her as much as she was already hurting.

That was a lie. There was one thing that would hurt more. And that would be seeing Joe get kicked out too. Therefore, she would do everything in her power to prevent that.

"I'm staying here when Sink comes," Liebgott told her, as she was readying herself for the meeting.

"No you're not," she shook her head. "Havin' you here will just be like rubbin' salt into the wound."

"You know what? I don't really care what you say, I'm staying," he argued. "You're not facing it alone."

"Joe," she sighed exasperatedly. "This is gonna be hard enough without me havin' to sit there and worry about you flyin' off the handle."

"I'm not gonna fly off the handle," Joe shook his head.

"That's a lie if ever I've heard one," Evelyn snorted. "Joe, just do this for me, please? I promise you I'll be ok. Eugene will be right outside the door if I need him."

"Oh so Eugene can stay but I can't?" Liebgott spat.

"Yeah, because Eugene can keep a cool head unlike you."

"You're not winning this argument, Ev. I'm staying."

….

Liebgott burst into the field tent in a foul mood. With a growl, he kicked over the cigarette butt bin.

"What the fucking hell are you playing at?" Martin marched over to him furiously.

"Fuck off, Johnny," Liebgott snarled. "I'm not in the fucking mood."

"I don't care about your fucking mood," Johnny stabbed him in the chest with a finger. "Don't come in here and start kicking shit about and acting like a fucking idiot."

"Do you know what, Johnny? Fuck you."

Johnny was unprepared for the balled fist that came flying at his face until it hit him squarely on the jaw. Immediately the tent erupted into chaos.

"Jesus Joe, what the fuck is wrong with you," Skinny and Malarkey dragged him away to the other side of the tent, while Bull stood in front of Johnny to prevent him from attacking Liebgott in retaliation.

Across the tent, Babe and George looked at each other worriedly. They were the only two people who had a good guess at what had Liebgott so riled up. Eugene had told them both about Evelyn losing the baby, and about the meeting with Sink.

"Get the fuck off of me," Liebgott argued with his captors.

"You need to calm down, Joe," Malarkey tried to reason with him.

"Don't tell me to calm down," he growled. "Don't fucking tell me what to do."

"Lieb, listen, this aint helpin' anybody, especially not Ev," Babe walked up to him. "You keep on like this and you're gonna wind up gettin' kicked outta here and where does that leave Ev?"

"Are you fucking stupid, Heffron?" Liebgott hissed. "What the fuck do you think is gonna be happening in this meeting? Do you think Sink is gonna be in there giving her flowers and telling her he's sorry that she's lost my fucking baby?"

A hush fell over the entire tent at Liebgott's angry tirade. The shock in the air was palpable, and just like that, everyone understood exactly what was going on inside Liebgott's head. The shock dissipated and was replaced with sadness for both Liebgott and for Evelyn.

"No," he continued, angrily. "He's gonna be giving her her marching orders, and when he's done, he'll be coming here and giving me mine."

"You don't know that," Babe argued.

"I do," Lieb yelled. "And so do you. So do every one of you. And I don't care if they kick me outta here, because loving Evelyn is something I'll never regret for as long as I live. But it fucking kills me that I can't change this for her. Not the baby and not her future here."

Johnny pushed his way through the barrier of men keeping him from Liebgott, and there was unease as everyone prepared themselves for another fight to break out. Everyone was more than a little surprised when Johnny reached out and hugged Liebgott tightly.

"If it takes punching me in the face a hundred more times to make yourself feel better, then so be it," he whispered, his voice laced with emotion.

It was a relatively unknown fact that Johnny Martin was someone who really felt the pain and suffering of others when they were hurting. He was just usually very good at hiding it. When Toye and Guarnere had lost their legs in Bastogne, Johnny had found himself depressed and melancholy for days afterwards. He and Bill had been tearaways back in Aldbourne. They'd even gone up to Scotland with one of their weekend passes and had gotten tattoos together to remind of their time in the airborne. Not that either of them could ever forget it. They just hadn't realised at the time how much it would affect them mentally. And for Bill, physically too. No one knew about the heartfelt and gut wrenching letter Johnny had sent to Bill, professing his admiration of the man and also the upset he felt at knowing Bill would wear the mark of war on the outside of his body for the rest of his days. No one aside from Bill would ever see the tear stains on the white paper.

Johnny knew though that even if he and Bill hadn't been such good friends, he would still feel such sadness for Evelyn and Liebgott. How could he not? Despite any of their individual flaws, the two of them had become like family over the years. Any pain they felt would be felt throughout the rest of the company. That was just how it worked.

"I'm sorry, Johnny," Liebgott apologised sincerely. "I was out of order."

"No, you're just hurting, pal," Johnny shook his head and patted Liebgott on the cheek. "How's Evelyn?"

"Not great," Liebgott shrugged. "She's tired and upset. She thinks it's her fault, and she seems to think that I should be blaming her. Of course I told her that's a load of crap, but you know Ev the same as I do. She gets an idea stuck in her head and the only person who can get rid of it again is her."

"She'll be ok," Johnny said. "She's the toughest girl I've ever met. She's not wild Bill's sister for nothing."

"That's true," Lieb smirked.

"Are you doing alright? And I want the truthful answer, not any bullshit. The truth's the least I deserve after that right hook."

Liebgott glanced around the group of men watching him with sympathy and care in their eyes, and he wanted to lie. To put up the tough guy front that he always did. But then a thought struck him. These were his friends, his brothers. These were the men who had trained with him, fought with him, held him in their darkest days in Bastogne. If he lied to them, he felt as though he would be doing them a disservice. They wanted to be there for him and help him through this, so why shouldn't he let them?

"I feel lost," he admitted with sigh. "I'm a man. I'm supposed to be strong and pretend that this doesn't hurt, but it's killing me. You all know how I feel about Ev. Let's face it, I've done a shit job of hiding it. The thought of starting a family with her, albeit accidentally, made me so happy. Now that it's gone, I feel like I don't know how I'm gonna live my life every day. And what's worse is that I don't know how this affects me and Ev. She goes back to Philly and I go back to San Francisco and what happens to us then?"

"You're an idiot," George tutted, smacking him playfully on the back of the head. "That girl is madly in love you. It's actually sickening, really. You could be on the opposite side of the world from each other and that wouldn't change."

Liebgott knew that George was right, but that still didn't his mind from working overtime and thinking every worst possible scenario. He just hoped that Sink wasn't being too harsh on Evelyn. All he could do was pray.

….

Evelyn had just finished pinning up her hair when Eugene popped his head around the door. She knew by the look on his face that the time had come. She smiled and patted down her hair once more. Doctor Chopain had forbidden her from leaving her bed for another day or two, and even though she lay in a borrowed nightgown, with the bedsheet covering her, she had been determined to try her best to look somewhat put together. Even if it was all a façade, it helped to settle her nerves about the iminent meeting.

"Colonel Sink and Major Winters are outside," Eugene announced. "I just thought I should double check that you were ready to receive them before I let them in."

"You make it sound as though I've invited them for afternoon tea in the parlour," she smirked. "Don't look so worried Gene. It'll be alright. Send them in."

Evelyn forced herself to sit up straight as Winters and Sink quietly entered the room. Major Winters smiled at her and she could see concern in his eyes.

"How are you feeling, Sergeant?" Colonel Sink asked, taking a seat on one of the chairs that Eugene had placed beside the bed for this meeting.

"Um, well thank you, Sir," she answered, forcing a smile onto her face.

Winters narrowed his pale blue eyes at her as he took the seat beside Colonel Sink. He couldn't say he believed that to be the truth. The paleness of her face and the dark shadows under her unusually lacklustre eyes told a different story.

"Now, you understand why we're here today, Sergeant?" Colonel Sink cut straight to the chase.

"Yes Sir," Evelyn nodded, taking a deep breath.

"I must be truthful with you when I say that you've made life somewhat difficult for me," he spoke.

Evelyn looked down, ashamed. Colonel Sink had an almost father-like aura around him. He was the kind of man that a person never wanted to disappoint.

"I can only apologise, Sir," she said. "I never meant to cause you any problems, and I of course take full responsibility for my actions."

"Be that as it may, they aren't just your actions alone to bear the consequences of," he answered. "Corporal Liebgott must face those consequences too."

Evelyn felt her heart begin to thud against her chest. She knew where Sink was going with this, and she knew that she needed to do something.

"May I speak frankly, Sir?" she asked.

"You may," Sink nodded sharply.

"I know that what Joe- Corporal Liebgott- and I have done is against the rules set by the military," she began, her voice trembling with nerves. "But when I first joined Easy, you made it explicitly clear to me that I wasn't to have any, er, liaisons with any of the men. However, as far as I'm aware, those orders were not expressed to the men regarding me."

"Where exactly are you going with this, Sergeant?" Sink narrowed his eyes at her.

She glanced briefly at Winters who was sat uncomfortably observing the entire discussion with unease.

"Please don't think I'm trying to be disrespectful, Sir, but is it correct that those orders were not expressed to the men?"

"You are correct," Sink answered begrudgingly.

"Then would it also be correct to point out that if Corporal Liebgott hasn't broken any direct orders that he then shouldn't face any punishment?" Evelyn questioned. She could tell by the look on Sink's face that she was testing the limits of his patience, but in all honesty she didn't care.

"Technically," Sink admitted. "But just because those orders weren't expressed to him, doesn't mean that he didn't know they were wrong."

"I know, Sir," Evelyn nodded. "But I'm the one who actually broke the order, and therefore I'm the one that should take the punishment."

"That's very admirable of you, Sergeant," Sink said. "But unfortunately he has to be held accountable too."

"Do you not think he's already lost enough?" she snapped before she could stop herself.

"Excuse me?" Sink was stunned by her audacity to question him.

"He's lost his child, and now he's gonna get kicked outta the airborne? That's hardly fair, is it?"

"I think perhaps Sergeant Guarnere is over exhausted," Winters interceded swiftly, casting Evelyn a warning glance. "It might be better if we return to discuss this when she's feeling a little better."

"I'm feeling perfectly fine, Sir," she said, her eyes flashing thunderously at Winters. She already knew that she was being dishonourably discharged. What else did she have to lose now? She looked back at Sink. "I know that what I did was wrong, and I know that my time here has come to an end. I understand and respect all of that, but I beg you not to do the same to Corporal Liebgott. He's a good man and a good soldier. Why should he suffer for my mistake? Colonel Sink, please. I will literally get down on my knees and beg you now if I have to. Please, please don't kick Joe out as well."

"Colonel Sink, I really think this conversation is perhaps better left for another day when Sergeant Guarnere is feeling more herself," Winters suggested, hoping that Colonel Sink wasn't about to fly off the handle at Evelyn's blatant disregard for authority. He sincerely hoped that Sink would understand that she was still grieving and in shock, and therefore give her outburst the benefit of the doubt.

"Major Winters, would you please leave me and the Sergeant alone for a few minutes?" Colonel Sink asked in a tone that left no room for argument.

Winters opened his mouth to refute the order but swiftly closed it. He cast one final look at Evelyn who met his look back with slight apprehension. She hadn't met to lose her temper, but her emotions were all over the place, and she truly felt as though she had no control over them.

The door closed behind Winters and in the awkward silence, she could hear him and Eugene talking quietly out in the hallway. She looked at Sink expectantly, waiting for him to berate her, but when he said nothing for almost three minutes, her mouth took over before she could stop it.

"I know I should say I'm sorry for yellin' at you, Sir, but the truth is that I aint," she said truthfully. "What I mean is that I'm sorry for the way I spoke to you, but I aint sorry for the things I said. I meant them."

"You know it's funny. I used to think that your brother was the brass necked trouble maker in the family. However, you've more than proven me wrong," Sink chuckled to himself before looking at her seriously. "Can I ask you one question? It's rather personal in nature but I feel it's important for me to know."

Evelyn nodded hesitantly.

"You and Corporal Liebgott," he began. "Are there feelings involved or was it just a bit of fun, and you got caught out?"

She was both embarrassed and surprised by that question. At first she wanted to tell him to mind his own business but then she realised that being truthful might be the only way to get Joe to be able to stay in the airborne.

"Yes, Sir," she nodded. "I love him."

"And does he feel the same way?"

"He does," she smiled. "We plan to get married once we're both back home."

"I see," Sink nodded, mulling that over. "And it is because of these feelings that you would give up your position here willingly to save his?"

"That's right," she said. "I would do anything to make sure he can stay here. Easy means everythin' to him, just like it does to me. I know there's no way I can be allowed to stay after all of this, but I can't bear the thought of him bein' sent away as well."

"Let us put aside our ranks for a moment and speak as one human being to another," Sink said. "Did you and Corporal Liebgott truly think you could hide the pregnancy from us?"

"No," she shook her head, her chest clenching as she remembered their joy only the previous morning. "We had every intention of going to Major Winters and tellin' him everythin'. Only, we were tryin' to give ourselves a few days to absorb the news, because our decision to keep the baby wasn't an easy one. Not for me anyway."

"It wasn't?"

"Not at all," she said. "When I found out, I was upset and scared and was adamant that havin' a baby wasn't what I wanted." She decided to leave out the part about trying to get rid of the baby herself. Sink was understanding, but there was no way he would tolerate her attempted act of criminality. "But then I calmed down and did some thinkin', and I realised that all the things I was scared of didn't matter. All that mattered was the baby and bein' a family with the man I love."

"And then it was cruelly taken from you?" Sink looked at her sympathetically.

She nodded, choked up and unable to speak. She hurt so much that she didn't know how she was ever going to get over it.

"I understand how that feels," Sink told her. "I trust that what I'm about to tell you will remain between us?"

"Of course, Sir," she promised.

"My wife and I have been married for almost twenty five years," he said. "She's a damn fine woman. Hell, she must be to have put up with me for so long. The first few years of our marriage were spent travelling and enjoying life. But then many of our friends began to settle down and start families of their own. Like most people, we just presumed that it would be easy. But it took us almost four years to fall pregnant. The day I came home to see my wife sat at the table, smiling so wide I thought her face would split, I just knew what she was about to tell me. And I can say for certain it was one of the happiest days of my life. But that happiness was short lived, because only a few weeks later my wife miscarried."

Evelyn listened silently, feeling sympathy for the man and also surprise that he was sharing something so personal with her.

"Over the course of the following nine years, she fell pregnant another twelve times and each time ended in the same heartache," Sink continued. "We saw all sorts of doctors and specialists, none of whom could offer any sort of explanation. And that was when we decided enough was enough. We couldn't put ourselves through the heartbreak any longer and gave up trying for a family of our own."

Evelyn felt tears brimming in her eyes. She couldn't imagine the devastation that must have beheld them time and time again. "I'm truly sorry for you both."

"I didn't tell you this in the hope that you would feel sorry for me," Sink explained. "But I told you because I want you to know that I understand how you feel. Emotionally anyway, if not physically. Just because us men don't discuss our emotions doesn't mean that we don't have them."

"If I'm being honest, Sir, I just don't think that what I've been through quite compares to your own sufferin'," she decided. "Although I thank you for the heartfelt sentiment."

"That's where you're wrong," Sink cleared his throat. "Whether it has happened to you once or a thousand times, the hurt is still the same. Your pain is no less great than my own. And it is for this very reason that I have come to a decision."

Evelyn held her breath, praying with every fibre of her being that he would agree to let Joe stay with Easy.

"I think you have suffered enough. Both of you," he said finally. "Which is why I have no wish for either of you to suffer further. You're a damn fine medic, and it would be a shame to lose you. Just as it would be a shame to lose Corporal Liebgott."

"So you're lettin' us stay?" she asked tentatively.

"There are conditions that need to be agreed to in order for that to happen," Sink explained.

Evelyn had a feeling she knew what he was going to say. And she was already blushing at the thought of it. However, the next sentence out of his moustached mouth left her completely stunned.

….

"Eugene stop fussin', will you?" Evelyn slapped his hand away.

"Well you're not supposed to be out of bed," he tutted, taking hold of her arm once more. "Just walk a little bit slower so you don't exert yourself."

"If we walk any slower, we'll come to a stop," she rolled her eyes.

"I still don't see why you couldn't just wait for Liebgott to come to you," Eugene huffed.

"Cos I wanna surprise him," she explained for the hundredth time. Also, she wanted to see everyone else.

Being holed up in that room, staring at the same four walls was making her feel worse about everything. She just wanted to be around people she cared about and who cared about her. She couldn't forget what had happened, her body was going to remind her of it for many more days yet. The thoughts whirling around her head would remind her. Which was why she needed distractions. Not because she wanted to try and bury it and pretend it didn't hurt, but because she knew it was too dangerous to wallow in grief. She wanted nothing more than to let it consume her, to drown her in agony. But that was a dangerous game because once she allowed that to happen, she didn't think she would ever be able to make it back to the surface.

The sun was shining and as they crossed the field, Evelyn noted a few of the guys sat outside one of the tents, playing cards.

"Ev!" Malarkey jumped up from the crate he was sat on. The smile on his face dropped when Talbert nudged him, and suddenly he scratched at his head awkwardly.

"Hey Don," she smiled, grunting as he grabbed her yanked her against him. She could practically feel Eugene's worry from where he stood. "Nice to see you too."

"How are you?" he looked down at her, his eyes misty.

"I'm fine," she said, placing a hand on his cheek tenderly. "Well, I will be you know."

"Yeah," he nodded, sighing. "I, uh, I'm real sorry about the, uh…"

"Thanks Don," she kissed his other cheek, knowing that he was struggling to get the words out. "Is Joe in there?"

Malarkey nodded, but before Evelyn could even get near the tent flap, she found herself engulfed by Talbert, then Grant, then Babe and whoever else was there. It warmed her heart, and she knew she had made the right choice in forcing herself out of bed. With her boys was where she needed to be.

The hugs and expressions of sympathy and love continued inside. She spotted Joe on his cot at the end of the tent, but when he saw her enter he made no move to get up. It was only once Lipton had corralled everyone outside, giving the excuse that they all had somewhere important to be, that he acknowledged her.

"You shouldn't be out of bed," he muttered as she sat down on the cot beside him.

"You sound just like Eugene," she said.

"So is this your goodbye then?"

"Huh?" she frowned.

"I'm guessing Sink wants you gone sooner rather than later which is why you're here?" Liebgott spat. "What? He can't even give you time to recover before he boots you out of here?"

"I'm not goin' anywhere, Joe." She smiled at the look of confusion and disbelief on Lieb's face. "I'm stayin'. We both are."

"You're not being serious?" Liebgott was in a state of shock.

"I am," she beamed. "Although there is a catch."

"I knew it," Liebgott groaned, running his hand through his hair in agitation. "Let me guess, we can't see each other anymore? We can't even talk to each other anymore? We can't be within a five mile radius of each other?"

"Shut up for a second and I'll tell you," she tutted.

As Evelyn explained the plan, Liebgott's face drew into a wide smile. Suddenly their hopeless situation seemed just a little less hopeless after all.

A/N: I just want to say that to anyone who found this chapter upsetting I'm really sorry. This is a subject close to my heart as it's something I've gone through twice. If anyone wants to talk or needs directing to professionals for support, just message me xoxo