Title: Mulder & Scully go to IKEA

Author: KS

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Post 'THIS'. Season 11 spoilers. Mulder & Scully take a trip to IKEA.

A/N: Thanks to WildWingSuz for BETA-ing!

Scully opened her eyes to Mulder's light snoring beside her on the couch. They were wearing the same clothes they'd been wearing for the past 48 hours without a single shower. She reached for the phone on the coffee table, half expecting to see Langley's digitized face once again...or that of their attacker. To her surprise, it was only mid-morning. They had gotten home at 6 am. It had been a long night. She surveyed her surroundings, the scattered papers and uncovered boxes thrown everywhere, reminding her of the events of the past few days. She nudged her partner in the side with her elbow. "Mulder," she whispered.

He jerked awake. "Huh, hmm Scully?"

"As much as I don't want to move from this spot right now, I'd like to go lay in bed and get some real sleep."

Mulder sat up. "You said 'our home'," he stated matter-of-factly.

Scully stood up from the couch, removed her boots and sighed with relief now that her feet could finally breathe. "And-?"

"While you were telling the FBI 'Mulder's residence', you don't think they wondered about what you were doing here?" he smirked. "And you recited the address without missing a single beat. Now that's an X-File, Scully. That's probably the real reason the Russian mob was after us."

She smiled. "This is my home, Mulder, I've ONLY lived here for a decade with you, even if we separated for a little while. I have to keep my apartment for appearances, you know that...FBI conduct and such. I never planned to be gone forever. Now let's go to bed, I'm tired."

She went to the stairs As Mulder stood up from the couch. "But you were so adorbs, Scully."

"It won't be so adorbs when I pull my gun on the next person that doesn't allow me to sleep," she said as she marched up the stairs.

"I got a little something for that," he chuckled.

They even left the clothes littered on the floor as they slipped under the sheets.

It was about 2pm when Mulder shifted beside Scully. If he didn't get up now, he was going be in for a long night of insomnia ahead. He wore a shit-eating grin on his face from the quick lovemaking session they had before falling right back to sleep. He stood up and pulled on his boxers. "Scully, time to get up, we gotta go to IKEA."

Scully, naked under the sheets, shifted slightly and pulled the blankets tightly around her. "Muuldeeer, come back to bed," she said, muffled into the pillow.

Mulder turned back towards her, having found his jeans and pulling them on. "You're going to hate me for the mess downstairs once you're well rested and if I pick out another kitchen set on my own, I may have to return it for not meeting the standards of Agent Scully."

Scully groaned as she tossed the covers away. Mulder couldn't stop himself from staring and standing in excitement. Scully caught his gaze and narrowed her eyes. "Why don't you get a head start on the mess so I can grab a quick shower."

"You mean I can't join in?" He said, clearly disappointed.

This made Scully smile a bit. "Don't make me get those handcuffs out."

"Oh you know how well I still operate."

It was about a 40 minute drive from their place. Despite being midday during the week, parking was still a challenge.

"Mulder, we should probably replace the kitchen appliances while we're at it. That stove is at least 100 years old."

"See Scully, aren't you glad you came along? I've missed having your impeccable taste in design and decor, though I realize the kitchen isn't Martha Stewart-worthy."

Scully smiled. "It needs a woman's touch."

After they got out of the car, Mulder turned to Scully with that shit-eating grin. "Oh I'm sure that'll come in handy later, Scully," he said wiggling his eyebrows.

As they made their way through the parking garage to the entrance, they turned to see a car labeled "security" following them at a snails pace. Mulder looked over at Scully who shrugged. While trying to ignore the car following them, they ready to confront the so-called security dude about his intentions. Just as they both stopped and turned back, they saw the driver laugh at them an quickly drive off.

Mulder and Scully looked quizzically at one another.

"What was that all about?" Scully demanded, clearly agitated and tempted to reach for her gun. The last few days had been enough.

Scully sighed. "I don't understand why we couldn't have just gone to Ashley Furniture."

"Is my minimalist lifestyle bothering you, Scully?"

She looked over at him as they walked into the crowded store and raised an eyebrow. "Mulder, if you were a minimalist, that would solve all our domestic problems, including your office, which is now in the middle of the living room."

They surveyed the huge warehouse."OKAY, So, we need a new kitchen table mainly...and perhaps a lamp or two," he said trying to recall the damage.

They went and browsed some dining table sets. Mulder watched as Scully stopped in front of a cherry espresso. "I know you have the whole mid century modeling scheme going on, but how about this?"

Mulder thought back to when Scully had lived with him all those years. Their home looked straight out of a Good Homes and Gardens magazine. Honestly he didn't care just so long as it meant she was coming back for good. "Well, you know interior decorating isn't my thing."

"I'll take that as a yes," she flipped her head in that way she did each time she was trying to fix her hair. Little did she know that the way she tucked those loose strands behind her ear turned him on. God she was gorgeous and it only seemed to get better with age.

"Mulder, you coming?" she called after him in that husky tone of hers. She was self conscious about it, saying she hated that she sounded like she needed to clear her throat all the time these days. Part of it was age and part of the acid reflux she developed as a result of being such an avid coffee drinker. Yet another thing that never failed to put a pitch in his tent when they were getting in the mood.

"Mulder!" She called out. Louder this time.

She was already walking ahead of him after noting the product information of the table set they wanted.

It only took him a short jog to catch up to her with his long legs.

"How about a new bed, Scully?"

Scully stopped in front of a lamp selection, hands on her hips, looking at him with one brow raised.

"I just want to get some good shuteye. I mean, I've had it since we bought the house nearly 15 years ago."

"Uh huh," she smiled at him knowing it was more than just about the bed being old.

"Annnnd, Dr. Dana Scully of all people should know that replacing a bed should be done every 7-8 years for optimal sleep."

He grinned, wagging his eyebrows a bit to her amusement.

"Well, I'm not a chiropractor, Mulder, but that sounds accurate," she smiled at him in that way that he knew she knew that wasn't the reason either. "Fine," she agreed as they moved to the bedding furniture area.

"We don't need to replace the bed frame if there's nothing wrong with it," she continued.

They found themselves near a selection of foam mattresses. "Oh I don't know, Scully, I think that frame has experienced it's share of 'wear and tear' over the years."

She rolled her eyes. "No bed frame, Mulder, but let's get a box spring."

As soon as they came upon display of a queen sized mattress, Mulder all but threw himself on to the bed and sighed, loudly.

"C'mere, Scully," he patted the space next to him.

She sighed. "Oh Mulder," she sighed but gave in, throwing herself down next to him with more excitement than she cared to admit.

"Ahh this one is great. And foam mattresses are so IN these days, along with ergonomic pillows. Keeps you nice and cool especially during the summer," he explained.

"Well, I'd have to agree this is much more preferable to that waterbed you had."

"Hey, it was a great waterbed...while it lasted. What a shame they don't make those anymore."

They spent more time laying on the display longer than they intended and Mulder occasionally glanced up to the customers walking by watching them like they may as well set up camp for the night. He turned to catch Scully who was clearly checking him out. He grinned.

"It's like a sleeping on a cloud, so what do you say Scully?"

"It is comfortable and I did pick out the kitchen table so-I guess it's a done deal. We'll order this and a box spring and have it delivered. Now help me off this bed."

Mulder didn't want to move, but the faster they got out of this store the faster they could get home and...'Clean the mess' he thought with a sigh. He sat up and reached for Scully's hand, gently pulling her up.

"Okay, what's next...lamps. Let's get one of those medusa lamps."

He held onto Scully's hand longer than he anticipated and felt slightly disappointed when she let go. If he was honest with himself, he kinda missed being handcuffed with her. If they weren't fearing for their lives, he had to admit he was a little turned on despite the circumstances at the time.

Once they picked out what they could actually transport and made note of what they needed to order and have delivered, they decided to pay the food court a visit.

"No alien butt muffins here," Scully said with slight disappointment.

"I'm still surprised you got something other than a veggie tray, Scully...Fuck," Mulder chuckled.

"What?" Scully asked.

"No fajitas either. We're going to Chili's tomorrow."

"Now there's a place that's always tops the "Eat This, Not That" pages of the internet."

They ended up settling for Swedish meatballs and chicken with black bean salad, both of which were gone in minutes since they had forgotten when they had last eaten.

They carried two different lamps they had purchased to the SUV after placing their furniture orders for delivery. After the ride back to their house it was about 6pm. Scully sighed loudly once they entered the house, clearly having forgotten the mess that still needed picking up. They decided to leave the lamps in the car and got to work. "I'm not waking up to this tomorrow," Scully said. As much as Mulder wanted to convince Scully to 'go upstairs for the night', he knew pissed off Scully wasn't the Scully he wanted to face tomorrow. They started with picking up the files, then broken glass and wood. It was one of those times Mulder resented his sunflower seed habit seeing the seeds all over the floor.

"Mulder another thing that needs to happen."

He turned towards Scully, whose hair was all over the place from cleaning.

"What?"

"You need to move your 'office' back into your office."

"Yes, Doc...or should I say Agent Scully."

Once they finished cleaning, they threw themselves back onto the sofa and put their feet up.

"Hmm, I guess we could have gotten another couch."

Scully sat up, surveying the couch. "Actually, it looks fine. We don't need another one, I like this couch, it's comfortable."

She smiled, folding her hands across her lap. "But we do need to do something else."

"What's that, Scully?" He asked, tapping her shoes with his.

Scully turned around towards the kitchen, eyeing the old appliances.

"We need to go to Home Depot."

"As long as we get to go to Chili's after."

"Deal."

The end

A/N: The scene with the security guard happened to my husband and I in real life at an IKEA years ago. It was really weird and I always think back to it whenever I hear about IKEA, because that was the last time we were there.