Chapter Sixteen: Normal

Four Months Later

Reader pov

The smell of hash browns and eggs pulls you from your deep sleep. You roll over, glancing at the clock on your nightstand, which reads, 9:00 a.m.. Groggily, you sit up, pushing off the soft covers and sliding out of your bed.

Your mind starts to wake up, the sleepiness replaced by a feeling of good rest, as you pull on some flannel pants and tie up your hair into a messy bun. You used to care what you looked like in the morning around Sam and Dean, but you've become more comfortable.

You open your door and make your way toward the wonderful smell, which keeps growing stronger. Gradually, you can start to hear Sam and Dean's voices grow louder. They must be awake.

As you enter the kitchen, Sam and Dean turn to greet you with their messy hair and sleepy smiles.

"Morning, sunshine," Dean calls, turning to face the frying pan again.

Sam is seated at the table, so you wander over to him, sitting at his side. He greets you with a kiss on the head and takes your hand in his, squeezing it gently.

"How did you sleep?" he asks loud enough for Dean to hear. His morning voice is rough and attractive, making you blush.

You feel a little guilty, but you refuse to share a bed with Sam because you fear he won't get any rest. You have still have trouble sleeping after all you went through.

"I had an incredible night," you beam, looking up into Sam's big and beautiful hazel eyes. "It was rough, on and off, but I think I got about four hours, and I didn't even have any nightmares!"

Sam grins. "That's a start. I'm happy for you."

Dean approaches the table, setting three plates down. "Four? Is that a record?"

"I think so," you cheer, pulling the plate toward you.

Dean smiles. "You're getting better, Y/N. You'll be back to normal in no time."

The comment makes you smile, but it also makes you think. You don't even know what normal is anymore. Normal used to mean going out to lunch with your best friend, Vicky, walking to the 7/11 at midnight because you had a sudden craving, skipping rocks on the lake. Who knew you'd end up where you are.

Four months ago, Sam and Dean had taken you home after they rescued you for the second time. You have never felt more at home. Dean pestered you for a while, making sure you were comfortable and felt safe, but he never restricted you. If you wanted to go for a walk, he'd let you leave, but you had to take a buddy; usually Sam, although Dean would offer to go sometimes. He cooked for you, surprisingly, and even did your laundry without being asked. He simply wanted to help you in every way possible.

Sam has been by your side since he found you again. He listens to you, offers advice, and is always there as a shoulder to cry on. He tries to hug you as much as possible - "Oxytocin!" he says. "Hugs make everything better." - and never pressures you to step out of your safety circle. He understands the pain you've gone through, and tries to move at your pace, praising every little accomplishment. Whenever Dean turns his back, Sam steals a kiss, always putting a smile on your face. He makes sure you know how much he loves you whenever times get tough.

That's why you feel guilty. You want to let him sleep with you, because all he wants to do is cuddle and protect you, but you want him to feel rested too. His health is more important than that.

You reach over and steal a bite of Dean's eggs, while he protests jokingly; "Hey! Eat your own!"

Was it really only two years ago that you saw a '67 Chevy Impala drive by your house? That was the beginning of the end of your "normal" life. You met Sam and Dean in the worst way possible; Dean shot your best friend, who turned out to be a demon, and Sam convinced you to kill her. You had to run away with these men you resented, suddenly fearing a whole new world of monsters and beasts. Somehow, they got on your good side, and you came to like them as they shipped you off a bus. They promised you'd be safe. Instead, you were captured by a demon who stole your grace and tortured you for an entire year - to you, it feels like more - only to return you back to the safety of the Winchesters. You were angry that they lied to you about "safety," but you forgave them, a false sense of protection coming over you. Your mind was scrambled, and you were taken away once more, only to show back up as a Winchester attack dog. And you nearly ended their lives too, if Sam hadn't saved you. All the pain, suffering, joy, hope, love, and fear of the past two years seems like it should've been acquired in a lifetime.

Somehow, you were horribly unlucky, and still feel like the luckiest person in the entire world. It's going to take time to heal your wounds and move on, but progress is coming at a steady pace. You have a loyal "older brother" and a loving significant other to get you through. Every joke, kiss, and smile makes you feel like the world might be a good place after all, despite all its faults.

Suddenly, there is a whoosh sound behind you, and a deep voice says, "Hello."

You instantly know who it is, and you jump up, running over to him. "Cas!" The last time you saw him was four months ago, when Dean broke the news to him that you were a nephilim. Since then, he had tried to visit, but was caught up in trying to find your biological father; an angel, obviously. You give him a big hug, and he hugs you back.

"I apologize for not coming sooner," he says, ashamed. "I have missed you, Y/N."

"Aw," you gush. "Did you hear my prayers?"

Cas pulls away and nods. "I did. Could you hear my responses?"

"I did! It was weird at first, I have to admit..." You smile, looking back in his clear blue eyes. "That reminds me... Did you find him?"

Cas groans. "Your birth father has been impossible to locate, unfortunately."

"That's okay," you shrug. "Thanks for trying, at least."

Cas flashes you a weak smile before glancing over at Dean and Sam. "I need to borrow Y/N for a moment."

"Sure," Dean replies from behind you. "Take your time."

You follow the angel into the hallway as his trenchcoat waves behind him, making him look even more valiant. All the while, you try to imagine what he wants to talk to you about. Did he find Crowley, who has been in hiding for the past months? Did he actually find your father, but doesn't want to say in front of Sam and Dean? It's then that Cas faces you, stoic as ever.

"Have you been practicing with your power?"

Not what I was expecting, you think. "Not really... Why? Should I be?"

Cas narrows his eyes. "You are powerful, Y/N. With great power-"

"Comes great responsibility," you interrupt. "Heard it before."

"It's true. You need to protect yourself and the ones you love, but you can't do that if you're reckless or ignorant."

You shake your head. "Cas, I'm trying to move on, okay? I don't want to be... What I am. And as long as I don't use my power, I can-"

"Pretend you're not who you are?" Cas interjects. "We have all tried to do that, Y/N. Dean, Sam, and myself. It is impossible."

You simply stare at Cas, wordless, dreading what he has to say next.

"I can help you," he continues. "I know you don't want to use your powers. But sometimes, the people we love have to come first. And I know it doesn't seem like it, but Sam and Dean are quite vulnerable at times. I can't always be here to rescue them, but you can. However, you can't do anything if you don't know how."

"I know how," you insist.

Cas raises a brow. "You mean, catapulting Dean into a wall and nearly smiting Sam? You were sent by Crowley to destroy and kill, not to keep them safe. You were reckless and unprepared."

Normally, you'd be hurt that he thinks you're irresponsible, but it doesn't seem to phase you. You know he's right.

You take a deep breath, thinking, before you nod. "Okay."

"You'll do it?" Cas asks for reassurance.

"Yes," you mumble. "But we're going to learn at my pace. Got it? I'm just starting to get back on my feet."

"Of course," Cas replies, shifting awkwardly as he tries to determine what exactly that means.

You smile and shake your head. "Don't worry about it. I'll..." You point to your head. "...Talk to you with my mind or whatever."

"It is called Angel Radio," Cas corrects.

"Right."

The dark haired boy smiles at you, and you nod, uttering, "See you around, Cas."

With a flutter of wings, he is gone, and you saunter back into the kitchen. Sam and Dean are mid conversation, Dean speaking with his mouth full of food. They don't even notice you entering.

"Chew before you start talking again," Sam groans.

"Mmm-" Dean swallows hard before trying again. "So this waitress gives me back the receipt, but she doesn't even answer my question! I mean, how could she not want to come home with me?"

"Not everyone is into you, Dean," Sam replies snarkily.

"Sam, I am gorgeous. Everyone is into me."

"Sure..." Sam mumbles, taking a bite of food.

Dean rolls his eyes. "Anyway, I confront her again, just in case she didn't hear. I said, 'Hey, beautiful. How about you and I get outta here?'"

"That never works, dude," Sam interjects quietly.

"Well, obviously!" Dean retorts. "But she looked like a chick who would dig that." He looked down, as if he was reliving the moment. "Anyway, she says to me, she says, 'Are you lost, sweetie? Where's your mom?'"

Sam nearly choked on his food as he tried not to laugh, but Dean kept talking.

"Can you believe that? She knew I was her age. She was just ignoring our blatant chemistry. I mean, I'm hot, she's hot. It was meant to be."

"Wow," you say sarcastically, finally sitting at Sam's side. "Totally meant to be."

Sam wraps an arm around you and pulls you closer. "You'll find the right one," he hums. "I know I have."

"Shut up," you gush, resisting the hug playfully. Sam leans down and pecks you on the cheek, and you groan. "Ew..."

"Definitely the one," Dean grins mockingly. "Look at her. She's so into you."

"You got me," Sam grunts in reply.

You squeeze Sam's hand in apology under the table, and he smiles, not looking over at you.

Life in general is going to be tough. It wasn't like you could just forget all that had happened, and it wasn't going to fade away any time soon. But you are surrounded by love. Cas has vowed to guide you in everything you do, and if that isn't loyalty, you don't know what is. Dean has pledged to make you smile, no matter how hard it may be. Finally, Sam has promised to love you unconditionally. All around you are lifelines, raising you out of your dark past. In time, scars with heal, memories will weaken, and you will find a way to be "normal" in this new life.

Suddenly, Dean's phone rings and you jump, snapping your of your daze. The hunter sets down his fork and lifts the phone to his ear, clearing his throat. "Yeah?" He pauses, listening, before he makes eye contact with you. "Yes, it's him. Mmhm. What? Shifters, you say?" He looks to Sam, nodding. "Sure thing. We'll be there tomorrow morning."

At last, Dean tosses the phone down and leans in, grinning. "Wanna go hunt some shifters?"

You and Sam exchange a glance, Sam's hazel eyes wide with excitement. You can tell he really wants to get back in the swing of things, but he wants to make sure you're okay with it too. He raises a brow, as if to ask you, You want to do this?

"Definitely."