Yikes! Hey, guys. Been a while, huh. Sorry about that. As I've said, this story really is the hardest to write for, this part of the Light Novel is a bit dry when it comes for opportunity for comedy. And of course, whenever that happens, I have to make my own opportunity. But I have REALLY been feeling the inspiration for other stories like [Lone Dragon Emperor] and [A Fool's Heart], ESPECIALLY LDE.

So that's kinda why I've been gone. It's because I've not been "gone" but rather updating other stories more often. Don't worry tho, I think that once we reach the important parts of this 'Peace treaty arc', shit will be much easier to write. These are just the boring, uneventful parts that I gotta get through. And trust me, making boring events interesting is super hard in a comedic style.

All of that aside, THANK YOU FOR 1,000 FOLLOWERS ON MY FIRST STORY HOLY SHIT. When I started this story, I never would've fucking thought that it'd be the one to get me there first. I mean, I just thought it was a stupid comedy. Then again, I guess that was literally the charm, lol. Anyway, it's awesome to see that this story has come so far and people loved it. Also, not to jerk myself off a little bit, but I also think that it's a little bit of an impressive feat considering that I literally have no other fandoms outside of DxD attached to my name. Sometimes I see other authors with high numbers for their stories and marvel at it, only to realize that they've made multiple stories for different communities. Not to say that I'm devaluing their accomplishments, but when I compare myself to somebody who's written like 20 stories for 8 fandoms, it ends up feeling like an unfair comparison. But, that is just how it works, it's no wonder that people suggested I do crossovers to get my numbers up.

But I think not. At the end of the day, I don't care about the number count as much as the integrity of it. I'd rather continue to gain these numbers like this, through passionately written work, rather than artificially inflating them by making a crossover or other fandom stories. As it is right now, I only have inspiration for DxD. So, I'm cool with this.

BUT, anyway. This chapter will probably have some original shit in it, in order to fill in for the boring plot stuff. This is a comedy after all, so not all the plot points need to be shown, just the key ones. Otherwise, it gets boring.

P.S. Shameless plug: if you like this story, maybe check out my other stories? In my opinion, all of my other stories are better than this one, since I prefer serious stuff with good writing. But it's up to you, you might like them. (Lol. Says he doesn't care about numbers, plugs other stories. Nice one, Nosferatu.)

SCENE

"Mutation piece?"

—A boy with a stupid face asked that.

"Yes, that's right. It's a special type of Evil Piece that allows one who would require multiple pieces regularly to be reincarnated with just one. Because of Gasper's Sacred Gear ability, he needed to be reincarnated as a mutation piece. However, due to his daily growth in power, there was a possibility that he could reach Balance Breaker. And considering that he can't control his power, they had us seal him away."

And the redhead, Rias Gremory, responded.

—The children of the Occult Research Club were gathered in their club room, discussing the subject matter related to the person they had just met. The little dhampir named Gasper Vladi.

"And now, the higher-ups have recognized that Kiba-kun reached Balance Breaker, and that you should be able to control Gasper-kun. Right, Buchou?"

"Yes, that's just as you say, Akeno."

In one corner of the room, a cardboard box randomly started speaking.

"...Uuu… I don't like when you talk about me…"

Koneko, who was standing beside it, karate chopped the box blankly.

"Eeeeek!"

"No complaints."

In consistently witnessing Gasper's cowardly behavior, Raynare found what she was hearing hard to believe.

"...So you're really saying this shut-in is all that? He's really that powerful?"

"Mm, well, out of all my servants, he's definitely the most powerful behind Akeno. Half-vampire though he is, he still comes from an ancient line of vampires. With his heritage, Sacred Gear, and magical ability, he's a force to be reckoned with."

"Aren't vampires weak to sunlight though? Is that why the little squirt won't come out?"

"No, he's a special type known as a "Daywalker". They don't like the sun, but they can function in it, unlike most."

Then, Gasper suddenly popped out from within his box.

"I hate the sun! I wish the sun would just go away forever!"

The blank faced Issei looked at Gasper who was shouting.

"Haven't you ever been to class? Do you have any friends?"

Gasper answered while shutting himself back into the box.

"No! This cardboard box is all I need! The air and light from the outside world are my worst enemies! Just let me be a box boy!"

"How does a shut-in vampire drink blood if he doesn't go outside?"

To Issei's curiosity, Rias elaborated.

"He's only half, so he's not entirely reliant on blood. We keep him going with a supply from a donor every ten days. He never really enjoyed sucking blood right from the source."

Then from inside of the box, Gasper shouted again.

"I hate blood! It's stinky!"

To which, both Koneko and Raynare gave him their harsh remarks.

"Wow. What a crappy vampire."

"..Failure of a vampire."

"Waaah! Koneko-chan and Raynare-senpai are mean!"

Meanwhile, Issei was unexpectedly standing over the box with a menacing presence, and what looked like pliers or clamps in his hand.

"A fake vampire. You are a disgrace to the fantasy genre. I will pluck out your teeth."

"Eeeeeeeeeeep!"

Rias stood up from her couch and started to walk out while being accompanied by Akeno.

"Akeno and I have to go discuss the upcoming conference, so you guys work on training Gasper on my behalf. Yuuto, my brother was interested in hearing more about your Balance Breaker, so I'd like you to come with us."

"Yes, Buchou. Good luck with Gasper-kun, Ise-kun and everyone else."

Issei responded with a salute, while also holding the terrified Gasper in a hold.

"Roger. When you come back, he won't be a vampire anymore."

"Hiiiiiiiii!"

"No, well, actually… We'd prefer if you don't do that, Ise-kun…"

"Don't worry, it'll only hurt a lot."

"N-Noooooooooo! Save meeeeeeee!"

Xenovia stepped up beside Issei.

"Oi, Ise. You're handling him wrong. That's not how you deal with vampires."

Assuming that he was saved, Gasper gained a bit of hope in his eyes.

But that was short lived. Instead, Xenovia pulled out her Durandal.

"Here, leave it to me. I know quite well how to handle vampires. Let me show you."

"Eeeeeek! I hate holy sword users! S-She'll destroy me!"

"It's okay, Casper. When I'm done with you, you won't have to worry, since you won't be a vampire anymore."

"E-Eeeeeep! Ise-senpai is even worse!"

"No, wait, hold on, Ise. I think his name was Jasper."

"No, Xenovia, it's Casper. It's obvious that he would be named after another vampire."

"But Casper was a ghost."

"He was?"

"Yeah, and he was also friendly."

"Oh. In that case, we should just kill him and make him a ghost."

"Y-You're both horrible!"

Koneko seemed to follow the actions of her two senpai and appeared behind Gasper with garlic.

"..Gya-kun, garlic will help you grow big and strong."

"Noooooo! Koneko-chan's bullying me too now! I have no allies!"

And just like that, Gasper ended up being chased by both Xenovia and Koneko around the outside of the new school building. Meanwhile, Asia, Raynare, and Issei stood back at the sidelines. Though for some reason, Issei couldn't stop messing with the pliers he held in his hands.

"Hoh, this looks amusing."

A familiar figure appeared, exiting the building next to them. The caramel-headed Saji Genshirou. Raynare seemed to notice him first.

"Oh, hey, it's that guy. Ain't he your friend, babe?"

"No."

"Ouch."

Saji approached the trio while holding onto what looked like a garden tool.

"Yo. I heard that your 'sealed peer' was released so I came to check it out."

Saji said it after he noticed the person that Xenovia was chasing.

"Whoa, whoa! Should Xenovia be waving around the Durandal so carelessly?!... Oh, get a load of the little blonde beauty! Is that her?"

"Yeah, his name is Dio Brando."

"Ha ha, very funny, Hyoudou. Alright, so what's her real name?"

Saji asked while turning to Raynare. Raynare just answered in a flat tone.

"Yeah, his name is 'Gasper Vladi', or something like that. He's a half-vampire, apparently."

"Huh? That's weird, almost sounded like you said [his]."

"I did. He's a guy."

Saji's expression became grim at that realization.

"..I feel deceived."

"Yeah, same here. I thought he was a genuine nosferatu, but turns out he's a phony."

"Alright, that's my cue to ignore you, Hyoudou."

Issei pointed curiously at the mini-shovel in Saji's hand.

"So what're you doing with that?"

"Oh, this? Just tending the flower beds. It's my duty as a pawn to keep the school looking beautiful."

For some reason, Saji said that with a bit of pride in his attitude. To which Issei, of course, commented on.

"You're a janitor?"

"Ah, there's the 'ignore' cue again."

"Mm. You're a smart man, Saji."

"So you're self-aware enough to acknowledge that it's the right choice?"

"I'm the most self-aware character besides the narrator."

"You have a narrator in your head?"

"Isn't he in everyone's head?"

"Okay, stop, Hyoudou, you're scaring me."

Speaking of narrators—

From beyond one corner of the building beside the group, a somewhat familiar figure appeared.

It was him.

The most handsome, dashing, charming, and strong of all the supernatural world. The amazing. The awesome. The astonishing.

The one, and only—

"Ah, hey, look. It's that Azrael guy."

….

….

….

And of course, the man's (my) entrance was ruined, just like that.

"Hm? Who are you talking about, bab—"

Raynare asked while turning back to the direction that only Issei was looking in. That's when she spotted a face that was familiar to her. Familiar enough to make her body go pale.

"T-T-THAT'S..! —A-AZAZEL-SAMA!?"

[—?!]

The rest of the group jumped next to their allies with their weapons drawn, in a battle-ready position. Well, except for Raynare, who was frozen stiff, and the blank-faced Issei, of course.

"D-Did you say, "Azazel", Hyoudou?!"

"No, I said Azrael. Ray said Azazel."

"A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A..!"

"Well, she's not saying anything right now, though."

The handsome governor of the Fallen Angels waved his hand disinterestedly.

"Calm down, no need to be on guard. I don't get off toying with low-level Devils and such. The Sekiryuutei is a good opponent, but I'm not the battle hungry type like Kokabiel was. More than that, I'm interested in your friend, the Holy-Demon sword user. Where is he right now?"

Despite his allies' uneasiness, Issei answered Azazel quite nonchalantly.

"He's not here. He's out somewhere with siscon guy."

"Siscon? Somehow, I feel like I know exactly who you're talking about…"

Azazel says it after scratching his chin.

"..But he's not here, huh. That's a shame. I was feeling curious about him, y'know?"

Azazel then turned his attention to the familiar woman who caught his eye.

"Oh, look, it's Raynare. It's been a while, hasn't it. I haven't seen you since the festival, but I didn't get to meet you guys properly that night. So you've been hanging out with the Sekiryuutei all this time after all, huh."

Azazel stated it that way despite knowing full well what Raynare's whereabouts were. Rather, he was more interested in her attire.

"Oho, but you've become a student, huh? That's admirable. Most Fallen Angels your age wouldn't bother with education like this, especially if it's to do with humans. Or maybe you're just attending so you can be with the Sekiryuutei? I don't see Mitlet and Kalawarner around here, so maybe that's the case. But who would've thought you'd end up with him. Honestly, I must say, I'm impressed. As my former pupil, I am quite proud of you."

Azazel gave her that lengthy speech, followed up by some light praise. Raynare, however, was turned into stone and could not respond. Issei tilted his head at their, ahem, "interaction".

"Hm? You know Ray?"

"Why, yes, I do. She was one of my many underlings, after all. I was the one who sent her out here on this mission to scout you, the Sekiryuutei. Then, she and her friends ended up never coming back. And as it turns out, she's now hanging out with you lot. So I suppose that's that."

To Azazel's confirmation, Issei gave Azazel an unexpected response.

"Oh. —Thanks."

"Hmm? You're thanking me? What for?"

"If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have met Ray. So thanks. I'm happy now."

Despite the blank face he said it with, Issei's tone was sincere. He even ended it with a bow. Upon witnessing that, Raynare's stone-like exterior was broken, revealing her red colored body of embarrassment.

"Wha—!? Babe, you—!? What d—!? N-Not in front of A-Azazel-sama!"

"Ahahaha!"

For some reason, Azazel found it amusing, so he laughed.

"To see that old Raynare blushing so freely, I never thought the day would come. Yeah, I suppose I'm satisfied with seeing that. I'll be taking my leave now."

With the wave of his hand, Azazel started to walk away from the group. But not before giving them one last piece of advice.

"Ah, also, that vampire user. The one hiding behind the tree over there. The quickest way to boost that vampire's abilities would be to have him drink the blood of the Sekiryuutei. Why not go ahead and try that some time? And also with the Vritra user. If you were to use your absorption line to suck out his powers while he uses them, would that limit his ability to a controllable amount? Maybe you should see. —Ah, that's right. I also hear that my White Dragon Emperor came to see you?"

"Yeah, she stayed in our house for like a week without permission."

"Ah."

Upon hearing Issei's reply, Azazel's expression became grim, and he was stuck with a wry smile.

"...Ah, is that so…. Sorry about that…. That son of mine is…. I mean, that girl is a weird one. But, she's not a bad girl…. She's just a little...special. I don't want you thinking she's trying to start anything."

"My Mama used to say I was special. Ray says I'm special too."

"Yeah, babe…. You're really special."

"—Ahem. Well, anyway, I'm off. Hopefully you'll consider those ideas I gave you. Later, brats."

Just as Azazel was walking off, Saji ran his mouth off at the governor.

"H-Hey, wait a minute..! You, what did you even come here for anyway?! Is that all you came to say?!"

"Heh.."

Azazel turned back to him with smirk that gave the boy chills.

"Yeah, it's nothing much…. This is just my hobby after all.."

And with that, he finally walked off without a word more, leaving the group of students in a dramatic silence.

…

"So his hobby is to talk to kids while wearing a naked yukata? What a pervert."

Of course, only until Issei eventually ruined it.

"Haah… Man, Hyoudou. Way to kill the vibe. I was actually feeling cool there for a second."

"Yeah, Creed says I'm good at that."

"Don't be proud of it."

Raynare raised a brow at Issei's mention of the former priest.

"...Freed? Oh, yeah, speaking of which.. Hey, babe, why don't you go check on that weirdo? We haven't seen him since the pool day, and even then, we didn't talk too much. Maybe you should go see what he's up to."

"Why?"

"Well, he hasn't been to school at all, so maybe something's up?"

"Is he even enrolled?"

"Who knows. But regardless, he doesn't come to the club of his own master, so isn't that weird?"

"Maybe he's just masturbating."

"Babe! Where did you even learn that word?!"

"Mito told me."

"That's disgusting! You know you should never jerk off alone! Just ask me whenever."

—"Hyoudou, no offense, but I'm genuinely going to fucking vomit."

"Me too. I just got motion sickness from standing around."

"You're actually retarded."

Part 2

Ding-Dong~

Issei rang the doorbell to an unfamiliar house and waited outside. After a few seconds, the door was opened by someone. It was a familiar white-haired boy wearing lazy sunday clothes.

"What? Is my package from Amazonian here?"

Freed Sellzen appeared dressed in a muscle shirt, pajama pants, and a gaming headset around his neck. He scratched his head at the appearance of the dopey looking Sekiryuutei.

"Hey, Creed."

"Huh? Oh, it's you. What the hell are you doing here, dipshit?"

"Issei."

"No. —Anyway, why are you here?"

"I came here to check on you."

"Check on me?"

"Yeah, Ray told me to come check on you."

"Ugh, Raynare did? Tch, what does it take to get that bitch off my back?"

The unfortunate priest was then abruptly met with a stomach punch that sent him flying back into his house.

DON!

"OOF!"

Crash!

"Oh, sorry. It was a reflex."

"...Uuuugh..."

—A few minutes later, Issei was seated on one of the couches in Freed's living room. Freed sat down on the loveseat in front of Issei and handed him an orange soda.

"Here."

"Soda is empty calories."

"Too bad, soda's all we got. Maybe the calories'll go to your brain and make it grow bigger."

"I think that would give me a brain hemorrhage."

"How do you even know what that is?"

"School."

"I don't get you."

"Me neither."

Issei looked around the house in curiosity. It was a fairly regular house, aside from the fact that there was a major gaming setup in the living room, taking up a majority of the space there.

"So that Raynare sent you here, huh, pinkie?"

Issei tilted his head at the odd nickname.

"Pinkie?"

"Yeah, 'cuz obviously, you're not the brains in the relationship."

"Oh yeah, I guess that's true."

Freed just sweatdropped at Issei's response.

'He's not even denying it..'

—"Ahem. Well, anyway: As you can see, I'm fine. Don't know why your girl woulda' sent you up here just for that. It's not like there's anything that woulda' put me in danger."

"No, she doesn't think you're in danger. She just wanted to know what you're up to, since you haven't been coming to school."

"Oh, that? Well, as you can clearly see, I now have a hobby."

Freed said that while gesturing to the gaming setup.

"So you've been playing video games?"

"Yeah, I've been up to that, mainly. I've been doing pretty good at any one I play, really. I'm thinking I might try it professionally or something."

Issei's imagination conjured up the image of Freed playing as part of a pro gaming league.

"Mm, that's definitely a cursed thought."

"I'm pretty sure whatever you think of is probably cursed, pinkie."

"So what about Donasheet then?"

"Hm? Oh, Donashit? Yeah, he's just working now, apparently. We live together in this house, but he's usually out working on his job."

"What does he do?"

"He's just a regular old office man. Don't know for what, but that's what he does."

"For somebody who wanted to be cool that's really lame."

"Yeah, I think he was convinced that he would somehow end up as a powerful company executive, but he didn't realize that you actually have to work your way up for that. So now, he's your average desk-worker busting his ass off like everyone else."

"That's hilariously ironic."

"Heh, so even a brainlet like you can see that, huh. By the way, what have you guys been up to? Did you end up fucking that blue haired bimbo with the sword?"

"I don't like her, so no."

"Damn, that's harsh."

"Eh, not really. She's not very likable."

"HAHA! Okay, that's just funny."

A light bulb popped up over Issei's head, as if just being reminded of something.

"Oh yeah. Do you know who Azrael… No, was it Azark... What was it?..."

As if he was reading his mind, Freed corrected the name for Issei.

"Azazel."

"Yeah, that's what it was."

"The head of the Fallen Angels?"

"Yeah, he had a head."

"No, I mean, he's their governor."

"There's a Fallen Angel state?"

"What? No. —I mean, yes. No, I mean— well, kinda."

"I don't get it."

"Just— He's the leader, alright? Azazel is the leader of the Fallen Angels. He's the big boss."

"But I thought Koka-cola was the leader?"

"No, he was just one of them."

"There can be more than one leader?"

"Yeah, there was three of them. Azazel, who is the Governor and Viceroy— Shemhazai, who is the vice-governor— and Kokabiel, who was the army general or something. But now that he's dead, I guess that means somebody's probably gonna take his place. Maybe Barakiel."

While Freed was explaining the logistics of Fallen Angel government, Issei just sat there with steam exiting his ears due to his brain overloading on simple info. Freed only sighed at his unsurprising reaction.

"Haah…. Well, anyway, that's him. So he saw you guys, huh? What for? What did he want?"

"Not sure. He said he wanted to see Kiba for some reason."

"Pretty boy? Huh, maybe he was interested in his sword or something."

"Yeah, he mentioned his Sacred Gear. He gave us some advice on that front too."

Freed nodded his head while taking a drink of his soda.

"Ah, yeah, I see. That's certainly him. He's got a thing for Scared Gears, that guy. He's real interested in 'em."

"Really? He showed up out of nowhere in a naked yukata, so I thought he was just a prankster at first. I thought he came to mess with us."

—Freed suddenly went quiet for a moment after Issei's statement.

"...A prankster, huh…"

"Hm? Creed?"

For some reason, while taking another drink, Freed seemed to look up at the ceiling with a forlorn expression. Unbeknownst to Issei's calls.

'...A "prankster"... Huh.'

"Ah, hey! Freed Sellzen, get back here, you troublemaker!"

"Hahahaha! Catch me if you can, you hag!"

—A young silver-haired boy ran away from a church sister at full speed. Her robes were covered in a some sort of white powder that were seemingly dropped from atop a doorway.

The boy had pulled a prank on her.

He was the little church prankster, Freed Sellzen.

"That's enough of your horsing around, Freed!"

"Ah, shut up, you old hag! Let me do what I want!"

"Why do you even pull such ridiculous pranks?! Why can't you be a good boy?!"

The boy responded with a mischievous smile.

"Hehe! Because it's fun!"

—Another time, the boy sat inside of an office. In front of him, there sat a bespectacled old man at his desk. A high ranking priest of some sort. It was likely that he was a Catholic bishop.

The man's eyes were cold and emotionless.

"Freed. Your behavior has been quite disruptive and obnoxious, according to many of the sisters. As an aspiring exorcist, such conduct is meant to be unacceptable. If you are not capable of showing discipline, in and out of training, then you by no means will be allowed to become an exorcist."

"Why?! They're just pranks! Those old hags had it coming!"

"It appears I haven't made myself clear. Freed, should your behavior continue as such, you will not become a full-time exorcist. That is all."

Despite the matter-of-fact tone that the bishop spoke in, he seemed disinterested. Almost as if the current situation was unimportant, and he was more concerned with something else underneath the surface...

"But I'm a good fighter! I'm good with a sword, I'm better than everybody else! It's not fair!"

"You must be able to hold yourself to the standards of other priests and exorcists amongst you. Professionalism is key to that."

"I am professional! Just because I like to pull pranks when I'm on my downtime and have fun slicing and dicing Devils on the field, that doesn't mean I'm not professional!"

"No? There are many times where your overly enthusiastic attitude towards slaying Devils ends up endangering the lives of your comrades. That certainly doesn't constitute as professional in the least bit, does it?"

"Yeah, but none of them ever die. It all works out in the end, so what does it matter? Isn't it alright to have some fun when you're cutting up monsters?"

"...Hmm… Monsters, eh…"

The Catholic bishop held an interesting look in his eyes for a moment. Then, he picked up a black chess piece from the set beside him on his desk. He stared at it quietly, and darkly.

"...It's true that many of those you have exorcised up to this point could be classified as 'monsters'... Many 'Stray Devils' tend to take on less humanoid forms due to their power increase, after all…. But I'm interested in how you would fare with something more physically similar to yourself…. I wonder if you would hesitate."

The bishop eyed the chess piece, and then the boy Freed. But Freed just smirked confidently.

"Heh, no problem. I've already killed plenty of Devils that look just like me. It doesn't matter, since they still try to kill me. I mean, in the end, they're all just monsters anyway. Right?"

And to that, the bishop responded with a nod. But with a dark glint in his eye to accompany it.

"...Very good, Freed…. With that mentality, you are indeed the potential for an exemplary exorcist…. Always remember that they are not human, Freed. —They are, just as you said, nothing but monsters. And it is the Lord's will that we exterminate them."

—Time moved on. And Freed Sellzen continued with his work, soon becoming a full-fledged exorcist recognized by the church.

And so, he killed and killed many Devils. Most of those being strays that populated the area and posed a threat to others.

There was once when he and a squad of exorcists were dispatching another monstrous Devil, as usual. A woman that took the form of a large, demented bug creature. The Devil struggled intensely, refusing to die more so than others. Yet, despite its best efforts, it failed. After only a few minutes, it could no longer fight or move. And it was quickly executed by the leading exorcist of the operation, Freed's ally.

To the exorcists, including Freed, it was nothing more than the average business.

That was, until, Freed happened to come upon the reasoning behind why the Devil struggled to live so valiantly.

"Hmm? The hell is this? A blanke…t.."

After removing what looked like some sort of cloth from a corner of the floor, Freed discovered something.

An infant.

Not a monster, but an infant. An infant that completely resembled a human. All aside from the tiny, leathery black wings on its back.

Freed's leading exorcist, Alphonse, stepped up beside him.

"Hm? Freed, you found something?... Oh, so it had an offspring, huh. That must've been the reason why it wouldn't give up…. From the looks of it, it seems like it could be a mixture of human and Devil. She must've had it before she became a monster….. Hmm, honestly…"

While Freed was left frozen by his discovery, his leading exorcist retrieved his light pistol from his robes, and aimed downwards.

"Lord have mercy on such abominations."

"WAIT—!"

BANG!

And a gunshot.

….

As if refusing to look anywhere else, Freed's vision was left stuck on the line of smoke arising from the barrel of the fired pistol.

And he stood there, silent and unmoving.

"What's wrong, Freed? First time killing something like that? Have you forgotten what our job is? We're real exorcists now. We take on the big stuff. Any moment of hesitation means death, or weakness. I wouldn't have expected you, of all people, to mess up with that."

Freed was left standing there, meanwhile, Alphonse holstered his weapon and turned to walk away.

"What? This shouldn't be that hard for you to get over, right? I mean, you're always acting crazy and laughing all the time. What's that, a lie? Or did you just get too comfortable with the status quo, and now you're back down to reality? Hmph….. Come on….. I mean, it's all the same to you anyway, right?... Just act like you're having fun with it…. Like you always do…. Right?"

And with only a smirk to leave him behind, Alphonse reconvened with his group and announced their next task.

Freed only stood there. Silently.

…

…

"...Fun?..."

…

"...Yeah, it's all the same, isn't it?..."

And soon…

"...I mean, in the end…"

A wicked smile grew to meet his face.

"...They're all just monsters anyway…."

—And so, Freed continued with his exorcisms, as he was instructed to do. It was almost as if nothing would change.

All aside from the fact that, his kill count began to rise dramatically, and the extent to which his comrades safety was endangered quickly followed.

The amount of instances in which he would exorcise a Devil and not have worn a smile, were now zero.

"Yeah, I'll take one."

—Freed sat down on a bench after purchasing some ice cream. He ate it silently on his own, not giving a care to what the outside world was doing.

What was going on in his mind, no one could really know.

"Hmm?"

But from the corner of his eye, Freed happened to notice a small figure behind a tree, watching him from afar.

It was a boy.

"...You want it?"

Freed gestured to the ice cream in his hand, causing the boy to retreat behind the tree.

"Yeah, I'm talking to you, I see you. Behind the tree, kid. You want this ice cream?"

The boy slowly emerged from behind the tree to look at Freed. He was a young boy around the age of 7, dressed in ragged and torn clothing.

Freed outstretched his arm, offering his ice cream to the boy.

"Here. Take it."

With obvious hesitation, the boy walked out from his spot near the tree and approached Freed. The moment he came into reach of the treat, he quickly snatched it and scurried back.

"Haah…"

Freed could only sigh.

"Whatever…. Must be some homeless kid."

Time passed, and Freed promptly forgot about the incident.

That was until, a few days later.

"Yeah, same one."

Freed returned to the bench he once sat on, and he ate the very same ice cream as before. He began to think of it as a comfortable place to contemplate things.

And of course, again, from the corner of his eye, he noticed a small figure standing behind a random tree.

"Haah… Well, look who it is.."

Only sparing a quick sigh, Freed stood up once he noticed the boy. He then purchased another ice cream, similar to his own, and returned to the bench. When he sat, he placed the ice cream down in the spot next to him and waited.

It was only a minute that he waited before speaking.

"...It's gonna melt if you leave it there, y'know."

That was all he said, to almost seemingly no one.

No one, unless you were counting the boy who emerged from the treeline, only to snatch the ice cream and run off.

Freed gave another sigh.

"...Haah…. You could at least say something."

—And so, he returned the next day, and the day after that. It had now become a routine for him to show up on that bench, purchase some sort of food, and leave one meal beside him for the boy to snatch away.

But one day, Freed decided to mix up the routine.

"Thank you for your patronage."

After purchasing some food at a restaurant, he made his way to the bench he always sat on to eat. He sat down and placed another box of food beside him, acting as if it was of no interest to him.

And sure enough, a boy came to retrieve it.

Only this time, the moment he placed his hand on the box, Freed placed his own hand over his.

"Hey."

The boy flinched harshly, but Freed just shook his head.

"You know it's rude to not eat with the person who buys you food, right?"

The boy remained silent. After a few seconds, Freed sighed and removed his hand. He expected he boy to immediately run off, as usual.

But to his surprise, the boy slowly took a seat beside him.

"..."

Neither of the two spoke, but they silently continued eating. Freed snuck curious glances at the boy who shoveled down his food, wondering where exactly he comes from.

And due to his curiosity, he felt encouraged to ask something.

"...So, you got a name?"

The boy, of course, did not answer.

"...Right."

But the boy paused, and said it while eating his food.

"...Benito."

"Hmm?"

Freed was almost sure he didn't hear it, and the boy was eating, as if he had never said it in the first place. But Freed acknowledged it with a nod.

"...Benito, huh…. Okay….."

The boy continued eating, while Freed simply took random sips out of his drink. After a minute of silence, the boy's voice was heard again.

"...Are you a priest?"

Freed took notice of the Benito's question and realized his attire gave him away.

He answered while taking a drink.

"...Freed…. And I'm an exorcist."

The moment he said that, the boy went utterly silent.

…..

And without saying anything more, Benito stood and quickly walked away.

"Huh? Oh….. Bye then… Guess he finished his…"

Freed couldn't help but take notice of the almost empty food box. Almost, because there was still a bit of rice.

"...food…. Hmm…. Kid's got a small appetite."

—Time continued to move forward, and Freed continued his work as an exorcist.

But during one of his jobs, there was a complication.

"Wha…. Francesca?! Is that you?!"

During a mission to dispatch a person believed to be in collaboration with Devils, Freed's group discovered something. Or more accurately, Freed's leader, Alphonse, discovered it. He was in shock to realize that a farm girl he had feelings for, was summoning a Devil for contraction.

"Francesca, what are you doing?! How could you be summoning a Devil?! You know this is an extreme affront to the churches teachings!"

"I know that, Alphonse! But…. My mother! She is dying, Alphonse! She will not beat her sickness! There is nothing else I can do! I must ask of someone who will help!"

"Francesca, no! This is not the way!... Give this up and we can overlook this…. We can go pray at the church together and ask for a blessin—"

"Prayers can only do so much, Alphonse! I have prayed many, many nights! But she only gets worse! I cannot sit and watch my mother die! I will do what must be done! Even if it means selling my sou—!"

But before the girl could even finish, she was dispatched.

BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG!

"NO!"

By none other than Freed Sellzen.

"Freed! What have you done?!"

Freed holstered his weapon, and a shadow cast a dark expression on his face.

"...What's wrong? Have you forgotten what our job is? One moment of hesitation means death, or weakness. Those who are Devils, are monsters, and those who follow them are heretics. Both must die…. You're an exorcist, Alphonse..."

But through the dim light, his twisted smile was easily identified.

"...Just have fun with it…."

—Time moved on again.

Freed returned to sit on the familiar bench. But this time, there was no boy to accompany him. Nowhere to be seen.

At least for a few days.

Freed noticed the boy again, after many days of absence. But now, it seemed as if Benito was being ever more cautious. Every time Freed would attempt at a glance towards him, Benito would instantly retreat into hiding.

It was now to the point in which Freed began feeling annoyed.

"...Ugh… Fine."

Freed stood from his place and walked off with both servings of food, nowhere to be seen by the boy.

That was, until he was behind the boy.

"Hey."

Benito jumped upon realizing that Freed was already behind him. But Freed just held out a bag of food.

"Oh, cut it out, will ya? Here. Your half."

Freed took notice of the boy's glance towards the pistol holstered on his waistline.

"It's for monsters, kid. Doesn't hurt people. Here."

Freed offered the food once again. And with some hesitation, Benito finally took it.

"Alright. Now.."

Freed then slid down the tree and sat with his back against it.

"Sit."

He gestured for Benito to sit with him. And after a short while, Benito acknowledged his request.

They ate silently together, as per their usual routine.

Though, while eating, Freed couldn't help but notice the odd bruises on the boy's body.

"Hmm….. Those are some harsh marks."

Freed said that, but there was no response from Benito.

"Well… whatever."

And the days went by again.

Benito's behavior had seemingly returned to normal, with he and Freed eating together, just as they used to.

Wack!

And on one of those days, a rock happened to bounce harshly off of the head of the boy eating next to Freed.

"Got him!"

It was a few random boys who had thrown a rock at him.

"Hey! Brats!"

"Oh no, it's a priest!"

"Run!"

The group of boys scattered upon seeing Freed.

"Get back here, you runts—"

But just as he was going to apprehend them, he was stopped by hand, by Benito.

Benito simply shook his head.

"Tch…. Damn kids…"

Freed grumbled in annoyance as he sat down.

"So, they're your problem, huh….. Fuckin' brats."

Benito said nothing and continued eating his food. But Freed was tapping his foot with irritation.

"Hmm…."

Until his mind acquired a solution.

"...Heh…. Hey, kid."

Freed called on Benito with a now rarely seen mischievous smirk.

"I've got an idea."

A few days later, Freed caught sight of the group of boys wandering the woods on their own. He "confronted" them with a supposedly angry expression.

"Hey, you, brats!"

"Uh oh, it's mister priest guy!"

"Run!"

"Hey, don't you run from me, kids!"

The boys ran off without looking back, assuming that Freed was following them. But he wasn't. He was instead hiding behind a tree, waiting for his 'cue'.

"Aaaah! Devil!"

"Mister priest! Help!"

And a mischievous smile grew onto his face.

He pulled a bottle from his jacket and spilled its contents onto himself. It was a liquid. A red liquid. Fake blood.

He ran towards where he heard the boys' screams and appeared with blood all over his stomach.

"Ugh…. Run, you...brats.."

Thud!

And the second he collapsed onto the floor, the boys bolted off while screaming.

[Aaaaaaah!]

When they were gone, Freed stood up with an accomplished smirk.

"Hahaha! Hey, kid. We got 'em."

Benito appeared from the trees ahead of Freed. And for the first time, he was wearing a small smile.

"Looks like our little prank worked. 'Guess your Devil impression was convincing."

Once Freed had said that, Benito's smile disappeared.

"Hey.."

But Freed tapped his head.

"Ya did good, kid."

Benito's smile returned, but, there was a sense of melancholy in it.

—Time passed, and Freed was back to his usual routine with Benito on the bench.

During one of their sit-downs, Benito asked Freed a few questions.

"...Freed."

"Yeah?"

"...You're an exorcist, right?"

"Yep."

"...Does that mean you exorcise Devils?.."

"Yep. All the time.."

After receiving that answer, Benito went quiet for a time. The silence sat in the air until Benito asked another question.

"...Do you enjoy doing it?"

This time, it was Freed who paused before answering.

"...I tell myself I do."

The silence returned.

And then quickly passed.

"...But, what's the difference between humans and Devils?"

To that question, Freed gave a deep and unsure sigh.

"Haah….. I don't know…... I ask myself that a lot too…. I used to think they were all monsters, like the teachings said, but….."

Freed's mind could only be met with the image of an infant with wings.

"Ugh….. I don't know….. I mean….. I guess all I can say is that, at least the ugliest humans aren't freakish monsters who hurt and kill people?.."

"...But, aren't they?"

"Wha—…. Oh… Yeah, I guess you're right….."

—Then, one day, Freed and his squad were tasked with another operation.

Late at night, Freed and his group were gathered outside of a large, abandoned warehouse. Their leader, Alphonse, gave them their briefing beforehand. And now, they were ready to attack.

"Alright. Remember, everyone. It's going to be dark in there, so be careful where you aim. Stay back to back. The report says that there's a group of them in there, so we can't take any chances. Ready?... Okay, let's go!"

And with that order, the mission was underway.

Shots were fired. The exorcists slashed the air with their light swords. There was blood spilled in many places. Only the blood itself glistened due to the pale moonlight that snuck through the warehouse cracks.

And soon enough, all was silent.

It was over.

"Is everyone alright? Give me a headcount."

"Here."

"Here."

"I'm here."

"I am here too."

"That's 4. Where's Freed? Freed?"

Alphonse called out to his second in command. But, there was no answer. Before Alphonse could retrieve his source of light, he noticed a silhouette standing in the moonlight of the warehouse.

"Freed. Is that you? Freed."

He didn't answer.

He didn't hear.

He didn't move.

He didn't breath.

He only stood, and stared.

What he was staring at…

.

.

.

.

..was the body of a familiar young boy.

"Freed. Free—"

—And so, the casualty count for Freed's squad, was 100%

BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG!

SLICE SLICE!

….

Not long after the disappearance of Freed Sellzen, and the wipe out of his squad, the church's investigation found Freed guilty of their deaths. He was promptly excommunicated for it.

And after that, he was known as infamous.

The boy who used to be a prankster— was considered nothing but a murderer.

Even by his own self.

…..

"Hey, how do you beat this guy?"

Freed was returned to his current reality after hearing Issei's voice.

It was just another memory.

"...Ugh.."

Freed stood up from his couch while rubbing his eyes tiredly.

"...Hey, hey. Who the hell said you could just start playing video games on someone else's setup without permission?"

"Sorry. You looked like you were dead, so I got bored."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever."

Freed stepped up beside the gaming chair Issei was seated in. He leaned against the seat with his elbow and watched Issei play on his gaming system.

"So are you going to ever show up to school?"

Issei asked that while blankly mashing buttons and staring at the screen before him.

Freed was briefly caught in his thoughts again.

"And so you see, Freed, these are my 'Evil pieces'."

Rias Gremory gestured to the red chess pieces that were on the desk in front of her. They looked as if they were flowing with power.

"So, these are the tools you use to turn people into Devils, huh."

"Yes, the very same."

"Hmm…."

For reasons unknown to Rias Gremory, Freed's eyes were stuck on the chess pieces below him. And he could hear a faint voice in his head.

("Always remember that they are not human, Freed. —They are, just as you said, nothing but monsters. And it is the Lord's will that we exterminate them.")

….

"Freed?"

Freed was snapped out of his thoughts at the calling of his name.

"Ah, yeah. Sorry."

"So, are you ready to become a Devil?"

Freed looked back down to the chess pieces one last time.

And he smirked.

"Heh….. Yeah, I guess so. After all, it's all the same, right?"

After returning to the present, Freed gave a small sigh.

"Haah…."

But then he shook his head.

"Yeah…. I'll head around to the clubroom every once in a while, I guess."

"That's good. It's more fun with you around."

For some reason, Freed found himself smirking at Issei's nonchalant encouragement.

"Hey, that so?... Thanks."

And after that, the two just played video games together.—

"...Hey, you gotta attack him from behind. That's what the platforms are for."

"Oh, that makes sense."

"Yeah…. No, not like that. Here, let me show you."

"Oh, nevermind, I got it."

"Whoa, wait, that fast? Whoa, what the hell? You just beat him in record time."

"Yeah, I guess it was pretty easy the moment I realized it."

"I don't get you."

"Yeah, nobody does really. Even Ray says that I'm a sphinx."

"A what?"

"A sphinx. You know, like a riddler."

"A riddler? You mean, complicated, like a riddle?"

"No, like an actual riddler."

"That doesn't make any… She called you an enigma."

"Yeah, that's what it was. I was thinking of smegma, but Ray told me to never say that again."

"Nevermind, I've decided I hate you."

"Haha, you're so funny, Creed."

"Get out."

—Until Issei was subsequently kicked out.

A few days later, Issei was called out to a certain place, alone. That was a holy shrine. On the steps of the holy shrine, there was a certain person waiting for him.

"Hello, Ise-kun~"

"Ah, Akeno-san."

Dressed in a shrine maiden "miko" outfit, Akeno was waiting for Issei on the staircase.

"Is that a new outfit?"

"This? Oh, no, not at all. I've worn it many times before."

"Really?"

"Yes. I even wore it last during the battle with Kokabiel."

"You did? I never noticed. I always imagine you being naked."

"Ara ara, ufufu~ I never knew you thought of me that way, Ise-kun."

"I think of everyone that way. When I was 10, I got nervous about being in a school play, so Mama told me to imagine everyone naked and I never learned how to turn it off."

"Oh…. I'm not sure what to say to that, but… I could have sworn that you acknowledged our clothings once."

"Yeah, I have."

"..But I thought you said…"

"Mama said my brain lacks internal consistency."

[It lacks brain cells, is what it lacks.]

Out of nowhere, Issei's left arm interrupted the conversation.

"Ah, is that the Welsh Dragon Emperor?"

[Indeed, it is. Hello, "stereotypical Japanese beauty".]

"Pardon?"

[That is what the idiot calls you.]

"I mean, look at her."

[What I am more perplexed by is his unnecessary desire to translate the title of "Yamato Nadeshiko" into a non-native language, and then use that as your reference label, hence: stereotypical Japanese beauty.]

"My brain lacks internal consistenc—"

[Your brain lacks. Period.]

"My brain lacks period?"

[Please extract me from this moron's body and allow me another host.]

"Ara ara, I am fairly sure that would kill him."

[It's worth the risk.]

Akeno gave a quick giggle before clearing her throat.

"Ahem. Well, that aside, we have more important things to do."

"Hm? Oh, yeah. Rias-senpai told me to come over here alone, but she never told me why. What are we doing here?"

To that, Akeno only smiled further.

"Ufufufu, something very important."

Though she giggled when she said it, Akeno's tone had a no nonsense feel to it. In other words, she was serious.

"I'm not testing out any stupid tea flavors."

Of course, Issei was not.

End

So there it is! Again, I am SO sorry about LONG ass hiatus. Officially my longest one yet. I was hoping it wouldn't happen, but life really gets in the way.

There's also the fact that I've been planning to start writing my own book soon, so there's that too. Lol.

Anyway, how'd you think of that? Quite an interesting characterization for Freed huh? I've read many a fanfiction and I don't think I've ever seen many iterations of him being dealt with. He doesn't get a lot of love, and I felt that he would've been a good comedic asset, as well as an interesting character to write in my own way. P.S. In the chapter against Kokabiel, after killing Nathan, Freed has a line where he makes reference of a past event by mentioning a "kid". Yep, that was Benito. Been foreshadowing that for a LONG time, damn.

And yeah, that means that next chapter is Ascalon, and we're getting further into the peace treaty arc. Trust me, the moment we start getting into the more active bits, this will be MUCH easier to write. It's just that there wasn't too much material in the more "filler" like parts, and every time I opened the document I found myself stumped on what to do. It was really hard to get into a creative space regarding this chapter considering that there wasn't much material (creative interactions/action) to work with. And once I got writer's block for this story, it killed all of my creative juices for the rest of my story, hence the wide hiatus.

But, doesn't matter, we're getting into the better parts now, so this should be much easier.

So yeah, don't expect that long of a hiatus again, hopefully. Next time, I'll make sure to give you as many updates as possible, even if writing my actual book gets in the way. Even if I gotta upload 1,000 word chapters every week, lol. (I REALLY don't ever want it to come to that tho.)

Tell me what you guys thought.

What did you think of the group's first official meeting with Azazel? What did you think of Freed's backstory? Is it sad nibba hours? Is Hyoudou Issei actually retarded (don't answer that.)? What exactly are you expecting to happen in Issei's meeting with Michael, and in the peace treaty signing?

Read, Rate, Review go crazy go stupid.

Stay frosty.