Mary

Once the door was closed Mary took a deep breath. The lovely afternoon had certainly taken a rather dramatic turn. She understood it though, there were soldiers who'd returned that were very sensitive to noise-on one occasion a dropped bedpan had caused more than one solider to tense up or to even start shaking. Mary unbuttoned her blouse and skirt, once again glad for the outfit which allowed her to forgo her usual full-corset. As she changed into dry clothes she couldn't help but blush slightly at the thought, Matthew was only yards away and here she was partially dressed...

She caught her reflection in the mirror, good heavens her hair... Another loud crack of lightning shook her from her thoughts, she had to tend to Matthew. She left the damp clothes on the towel rack and went back into her bedroom. Matthew was sitting just where she'd left him, his elbow was braced on his knee and she could see his hands shaking slightly. She called his name as she walked towards him, as she knew in this state men could be easily startled. He looked up at her, eyes wide. "I'm sorry Mary.." he said softly. She grasped his hand (how was it still so cold?) and squeezed it firmly. "You have nothing to be sorry about."He closed his eyes, and she was sorely tempted to reach out and smooth the lines she saw creasing his forehead.

A second later there was a quiet knock on the door and Anna came in with the things Mary had sent for. "Thomas was as close as we could find Milady, and since he's not here to put up any fuss" Anna handed her a dry set of clothes. She then went back through the doorway and returned with a large tea tray, the basin of water and a small pile of white clothes."Is there anything else I can help with Milady?"Mary shook her head and dismissed her maid, "No, thank you Anna." She noticed Anna look pointedly at Matthew."Shall I let you know of Lord or Lady Grantham's arrival Milady?" She asked. Mary smiled, Anna was always thinking ahead. "Yes, thank you Anna. That would a good idea." Anna nodded and smiled slightly before leaving the room, door open just a crack. Mary turned to Matthew and offered him the clothes. "I know this is all terribly improper Matthew, but these are the only dry clothes I can offer you." Matthew blinked at her before gently shaking his head and standing up. "No Mary it's fine, thank you. I appreciate all the trouble you're going to. Are you sure you wouldn't rather I called for Bates or tried to telephone Mother?" Mary shook her head, "I've seen much scarier things at the hospital, believe me." She gestured towards her changing wall, "if you can manage the trousers one-handed I can help you with your shirt and redress your shoulder." She hoped her voice sounded authoritative, like her nursing superiors. Matthew must have noticed something in her tone, for her smiled and ducked his head, taking the proffered trousers and heading to where Mary had directed. Mary went back to the tray and poured the tea, taking a fortifying gulp that burned her throat slightly going down. That was always the best way to drink tea, she believed, just on the edge of piping hot.

Matthew managed to change quickly enough and emerged a moment later, his face slightly flushed. Mary handed him a cup of tea once he sat down, sure he needed it just as much as she had. He too, took a long drink and sighed quietly. Mary grinned, "I suppose you really have missed the tea." He looked back at her, seeming a bit more like himself, "More than you can imagine." A slightly quieter but still audible rumble of thunder came from outside and Matthews teacup rattled in its saucer. He winced, "I'm sorry Mary." She reached for the tea and placed it on the small side table. "Like I said before, it's completely alright. Now let's see about your shoulder." Taking a deep breath and trying desperately to seem professional, Mary unbuttoned Matthews still-damp shirt, somewhat awkwardly wrestling his left arm out of the sleeve and walking around the back of the settee to remove his shirt without jostling the injured right arm. She left the shirt on his right shoulder and was about to walk back to face him when the firelight caught the raised edges of scars on his back. She stopped and stared at the collection of scars, some old, some new, some shallow and some looked like they had been deep. Mary tried not to make a sound but she must have gasped as she got a better look at his left side. Matthews back straightened slightly at the noise. There were blue and purple bruises spanning his rib cage, with still healing suture lines running across his abdomen. "Are those from the explosion?" She asked quietly, her voice almost a whisper.

His voice was low and rough, "Shrapnel. Mary, I was lucky. Am lucky." Mary ran her fingertips along the healed scars on his back. "My Perseus" she whispered, and on impulse placed a kiss on the top of his shoulder. Matthew turned to face her as she lifted her head, staring longingly at her. As he twisted something must have caught for she saw his face tighten in pain. What was she doing? She needed to fix up his shoulder and quick, before her parents came back and another man was caught in her bedroom. She came back around and helped him ease the rest of the shirt off, his right arm and shoulder still very tender. She used a wash cloth to wipe some of the dirt and grass from his stumble, Matthew didn't speak while she did, but his eyes followed her every move. After she was finished she turned back to the tray and took the thin strip of cotton, cutting it to an appropriate length for a sling. Then she helped him into the dry shirt, smiling as Matthew joked he was to once again be mistaken by her for a servant. "Things have certainly changed" she said absently, as she tied the corner of the sling on his opposite shoulder.

"They have indeed" he agreed, "I'm having my sling tied by none other than nurse Crawley while sitting in Lady Mary's bedroom." She looked narrowly at him "Don't think because I'm fixing you up that I won't swat you for inappropriate comments." He grinned. "I would never!"

Mary tried not to let his teasing ruin the moment. She had been working hard over the last months to reconcile herself with "the incident" and felt she had made great progress with how she viewed it, and how she viewed herself. So what if he was the second un-married man she'd let into her room? Matthew was a gentleman and she trusted him completely, she loved him and she knew he would never try anything untoward. She fixed the pin and stepped back to take in her handy work. "How does it feel?" she asked him. He twisted slightly, "Almost as good as new," he answered, smiling. Matthew took one of the jam cookies from the tea tray and watched her as she tidied up. Mary gathered Matthews damp, but neatly folded clothes. "Shall I have these laundered for you?" she asked. Matthew looked suddenly alarmed, "AH, no Mary, thank you. I can take them back with me." He stood and held his hand out for them and, somewhat confused, she handed them back to him. They stood for a moment in front of the fire, Mary thought that Matthew even looked good in a servants clothes. He'd become trimmer during his time at the front and, though she really couldn't draw comparison as she'd never seen him without a shirt before, she thought his shoulders seemed broader, stronger. The firelight lit the side of his face, making his usual golden hair appear nearly bronze. Mary was struck by the sudden thought that while Matthew was here now, healthy, strong, alive, it would only take a single bullet to take him from her forever. She tried desperately not to think so negatively but her eyes began to sting. Matthew must have noticed because his brow furrowed in confusion, "Mary?" he asked, "What's the matter?" She shook her head, knowing she couldn't voice her worries, he had more than enough to worry about. Instead, she took a step forward and wrapped her arms around his torso; mindful of his injured side. She turned her face and rested it on his chest, his shirt might have smelled like 's laundry soap but beneath it she thought she could still smell him.

Matthew started slightly and made a small noise of surprise but bent his head over hers and pressed his lips to her head, his left arm, clothes still in hand, rested at her back. "Thank you" she said, her voice slightly muffled by his chest. "I know you can't make any promises, but thank you for coming back, even if.." she felt a few tears escape and pressed her face back against him. "Mary" he said, his voice full of emotion, "Of course I came, I-" she felt his arm move and his clothes brushed by her legs as they fell to the ground. He stepped back from her abruptly and crouched on the ground, rummaging through his wet clothes. Matthew stood again before her, a small box in his hand and an indescribable look on his face. He exhaled, "Mary I don't want to make hollow promises but I can promise I'll try my damnedest to come back to you." He swallowed and she noted offhandedly that she had missed a couple buttons at the neck of his shirt. "Would you.." he paused, "Would you wait for me?" Mary looked back at him, confused, of course she would wait for him! She was hardly going said as much and he smiled briefly before dropping to one knee in front of her.

The full weight of what he said finally occurred to Mary and she stood looking down at him, her heart beating wildly. He grinned nervously before struggling slightly to open the box with his left hand. Once he had succeeded he met her eyes again. "Mary Crawley, will you marry me?" he asked, hope and fear mingling in his voice and in his eyes. Mary had imagined being proposed to since she was a little girl, had fancied that some grand gentleman would ride up to her house and she'd rundown the stairs and into his arms and he would sweep her off her feet and away on horseback. As she looked down at him, one arm bandaged, hair damp and sticking up oddly in places she considered marrying the man everyone had hoped she would, Matthew Crawley. Matthew Crawley; the man who she'd scorned, argued with, teased mercilessly, the man who had stolen her inheritance...and also, it seemed, her heart. She thought to herself, this was even better.

"Yes" she said, hardly daring to believe he was really asking again, "Yes of course I will!" She helped him back up and held the box so he could slip the ring onto her finger. Mary could feel a ridiculous grin spreading on her face as she looked at the ring then back at Matthew. He was grinning back at her. Slipping the box into his pocket he reached towards her and kissed her firmly on the lips. "Then you have made me the happiest man in the world!" he exclaimed, and she stretched up on her toes to pull him down for another kiss. They broke apart and he laughed, their happiness making them both feel giddy.

Of course, fate would chose that moment for Anna to knock once and pop her head inside the room, "Milady-" she stopped when she took in the scene before her. "I'm sorry to interrupt" she said wryly, "but his Lordship's car has just pulled up in front." Mary smiled, just happy that it hadn't been a few minutes earlier. "Well Cousin Mathew, I would be remiss if I didn't ask you to stay for dinner. Will you join us? I can ring for Isobel too, let her know I didn't lose you out on the grounds today." Matthew chuckled, his cheeks still flushed as he bent to collect his fallen clothes. "I would love to, Lady Mary. Something tells me it's going to be a very interesting dinner indeed." He straightened and impulsively gave her a peck on the cheek as he passed, letting Anna lead him somewhere a little less incriminating. Mary watched from the doorway as he disappeared down the corridor before shutting her door and leaning against it. This was not at all what she had been expecting today! She smiled and looked at the ring before hurrying to the bathroom and hoped Anna would be quick to return, she really did have to do something about her hair...