And now we have truly reached the end… Thank you if you're still here.

To everyone that reviewed at any point during this story, know that you made my day every time you shared your thoughts with me, and special thanks to all guest reviewers I could never thank personally.

Epilogue: Dear Martin,

It had been ten months since Marty Deeks' life had been turned upside down by the return of his long, lost father, and about five months since he had been back full time at NCIS. With the help of his team and mother, he had managed to put all that had happened behind him, now fully healed physically and finally back to truly enjoying the water and surfing. The detective glad he hadn't allowed his father or the triplets to take that away from him.

Waking up one morning, he silently walked to the kitchen to finish spicing the turkey before setting it in the oven. In just a few hours, his teammates would be arriving to celebrate Thanksgiving at his and Kensi's house.

Finishing in the kitchen, he decided to go out to get the mail. He wasn't sure if it was supposed to come today, but it had been a few days since they had checked, having worked the past 36 hours straight because bad guys don't take holidays off and apparently Thanksgiving is prime time for weapons trafficking and other matters of national security. Exiting his house, he breathed in the autumn air as he walked down the steps of his front porch, the leaves having already begun turning color and a chill having set in the air.

Mail in hand, Deeks began walking back towards the house as he began checking their correspondence. Most letters being bills or ads were discarded to the side. Until his blood went cold and his heart seemingly stopped beating. An envelope from a federal prison in Florida making his breathe catch in his throat as he slowly recalled the last time he had received a mysterious envelope. Memories of Mexico, the triplets, being his father's prisoner, and all the psychological and physical pain they had inflicted on him then rushed into his mind, making him stumble. Deeks put a hand on the wall as he tried to steady himself, but his ground had shifted, and he promptly slid to the floor. This couldn't be happening again, echoing over and over again in his frantic mind.

For a brief moment, Deeks thought of running. It was still early, and he could easily walk back inside, grab some clothes and his car keys and be at the border before Kensi ever realized he was gone. But then, his thoughts stayed on Kensi and how she was always the light to his darkness, willing to sacrifice some of her own naivety to make sure his dark past didn't obscure his future. So, taking a few minutes to regain his composure, he put the envelope in his pocket and lifted himself from the ground. Stumbling shakily into his house as his hands began to tremble.

By the time Kensi woke up, Deeks had already showered and dressed, and now sat quietly in their yard with his eyes closed. Walking from behind, Kensi wrapped him in a hug and kissed his blonde curls, frowning at his lack of response. But before she had a time to ask what was wrong, he turned around, a trace of tears still evident on his face.

"What happened?" Kensi asked lowly, her own panic starting just by his reaction. She knew Thanksgiving was usually a bad time for him, many memories of his painful past making it hard for her fiancé to be grateful of everything he had been forced to endure in life. But since they have met and gotten together, he had managed to find many new reasons to be thankful for and they usually had a good day, especially when they celebrated with their family.

Deeks stayed quiet, just moved his hand to his pocket, pulling out a white envelope that he handed to Kensi. When she read the letters on the front, her own blood went cold as she realized where it was coming from.

Letting the envelope fall to the ground, Kensi instantly moved to hug Deeks, saying no words, just letting her actions show that she was here, and he had her full support.

"What did it say?" Kensi eventually inquired, as she pulled Deeks down with her until they were both sitting on the grass, with Monty by their side. Their own little family together and ready to deal with whatever life was throwing at them now.

Drawing in a deep breath, Deeks closed his eyes before answering. "I don't know, haven't opened it yet… waiting for you."

At the words, Kensi's heart fluttered on her chest. Thinking back to the last year, how Deeks had reacted the first time he had received such an envelope, and his escapade to Mexico, Kensi felt the need to just kiss him soundly as a thank you. Because now he had decided to wait for her, and nothing would ever show more growth from this man she loved more than life itself. From a subject that he rarely talked about, to a painful past he was now willing to revisit and share with her.

"Then let's open it." She answered solemnly.

"You do it." Deeks said, grabbing the discarded envelope, and pushing it back into her hands.

Kensi did as requested and gasped audibly as she saw a picture tucked away behind the folded letter that topped the envelope's contents. She sadly remembered the last images Deeks had received and wanted nothing more than to shield him from any more pain. But knowing from experience the best way to escape the past wasn't necessarily by running from it, she took in a calming breath and passed the envelope's contents into Deeks' shaking hands. Her hand, then moved to stand supportively on his shoulder, the other secretly closing in a tight fist. Monty's head now rested on Deeks' lap, his fateful companion also noticing that his human needed support, thus, providing comfort in the only way he knew how.

Closing his eyes once again, Deeks lifted his head towards the sky, relishing the heat of the sun on his skin, a reminder that he was alive and would again survive whatever words were contained on the papers on his hand. Released his breath slowly, Deeks' eyes opened again as he began to read.

-x-x-x-

Hello son,

Happy Thanksgiving! I hope that new family of yours is giving you better memories to remember this day by. I know I have some of my own. You probably don't quite remember, but we had some good ones together as a family before everything happened. You should ask your mother to tell you about your first one. Roberta was already back at work, and tired all the time, and I didn't want anything to go wrong in the kitchen, so we ended up having dinner at a diner along the beach and then walking there together as we watched the sun go down. There were a lot of surfers that day, maybe that's why you like it so much… I remember your eyes sparkling with the blue of the ocean and feeling the luckiest man in the world.

I still wish I had taught you how to surf, not sure if you ever learned, but I think you would have been good at it. I remember you wanted a skateboard for Christmas when you were 5, we finally got you a used one the following year, and you were so good at it. Uncanny balance for such a young one. Makes me wonder what you could have looked in the water.

Anyhow, I'm straying from what I wanted to say, not that I know this letter will ever reach you, but I just had to try. I'm in a federal prison in Florida, thank you. On the day of my transfer, I was told I was supposed to be headed to the Northeast, but some last-minute change had me ending down here. I asked who had requested the change, but the officer just said it was above his pay grade. I know it was you, son. I still don't know why you feel compelled to help me, God knows I never gave you a reason to, but thank you.

I'm sorry about everything that happened, I truly am. I should have never allowed those men to hurt you, and I'm sorry I was so clouded by hate that I sided with people like that. I know you must think that there's a lot more that I should be apologizing for but letting the triplets waterboard you is at the top of that list. I wish I could take that part of our story away, but I know there's no do overs and I already messed enough. I'm sorry for all the pain that I have caused you, Martin.

That day back in LA, when you came to see me in prison, you said you could still be a son, even if I had never been a father to you. But I was, for some years we were happy. I'm not trying to make excuses now, just saying that I remember those days, and I wish you would too. Ask your mother for some stories, times weren't always so bleak, and you deserve to also know about that.

Tell Roberta I'm sorry. For ever hurting her and making her a single mother. She did a great job raising you, son. And you're better than I could have ever made you. You both should be proud of yourselves.

Back in LA, you also said some of my darkness will ever be in you. Don't know what you meant, don't know if I even want to know or what you have already done. But never let it take over, Marty. Never hurt the people you love. Regardless of how dark life gets, don't lose control and please, don't change. I like to believe in second chances, but also on sons and daughters turning out better than their parents. And you, Martin, are my greatest accomplishment and I want you to be better and happier than me.

I hope one day you feel compelled to come out and visit me again, I would like for us to talk. I know I don't deserve to be your father, but maybe we can talk as just acquaintances. Or you can even see me as just another scumbag you arrested. Anything, son, if it will get you here someday…

I would really like to see you and Roberta again,

Gordon.

-x-x-x-

Silent tears streaked Deeks' face as he finished reading his father's words. His eyes once again closed as he focused on the warmth of the mid-morning sun. His heart beat steadily on his chest and he tried remembering the days his father had mentioned on the letter. But all memories of his father started when he had already turned into a violent man, and Deeks silently cursed himself at not remembering, feeling an inexplicable need to go back, if only at least mentally, to those happier times his father had spoken about.

Turning around to look at Kensi, he was surprised to see tears on her face as well, her eyes staring back at him with a silent question he didn't have an answer to. So instead, he folded the letter and tuck it back into his pocket, turning his attention now to the pictures.

The first one must have been the Thanksgiving Day his father had just mentioned as it showed the 3-person family standing in the beach with smiles on their faces and the crashing waves behind them. A group of surfers was visible at their backs and Deeks again tried to remember that day. Roberta was wearing a flowery dress and his father was dressed much like he liked to dress now on weekends when they had no cases. Board shorts, and a long-sleeve shirt, making Deeks silently wonder if his father could have possibly been a surfer at some point. Making a mental note to ask his mother next time he saw her, Deeks flipped the photograph and saw the day and time written in what was clearly his father's handwriting, Thanksgiving, 1980.

The second photo showed what looked like a 3-year-old Deeks, blonde curls hidden under a Santa hat, his eyes shining as he held a Thomas Tank Engine Plush Toy on his small hand. Gift paper laid discarded at his side as the young boy only focused on the colorful toy. The picture again angering Deeks as he couldn't remember ever receiving that gift and wondering if that train could have started his desire for a real model train that wasn't Thomas. The date on this one read Christmas Day, 1983.

The final picture, showed a very pregnant Roberta lying in bed next to a Brandel with an outstretched hand that caressed her belly, making Deeks consider who had taken the picture. The room was simple and Deeks remembered it as his parent's bedroom in the first house he had lived in. Flipping this one around, Deeks found his father's handwriting again, but this time they carried more than a timely reminder, the words best day ever shinning through in blue marker. This one making Deeks long for his best day ever, while silently imagining what his and Kensi's kids would look like.

Standing up shakily, Deeks was surprised when a previously unseen photograph dropped to the floor. Picking it up he took in an audible breath as he clearly remembered the day. It was his 8-year-old birthday and he stood blowing out the candles on a chocolate cake, his mother and father each with a hand on his shoulder as they smiled lovingly at their son. Turning the photograph, the date read January, 1987. The date making Deeks realize this was the first of the pictures he actually remembered, having been taken just months before his father had turned into the man he knew now. Deeks then silently wondered what had changed in those few months to turn his father into a violent bastard.

"You okay?" Kensi asked eventually when all that could he heard were Deeks' barely contained sniffles, among the sounds of the wind and the chirping birds.

'Yeah." He answered with a sad smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. Then he grabbed all the contents of the envelope and walked to their bedroom, where he put them on his nightstand's drawer before walking back towards the kitchen to check on the turkey, not wanting to ruin Thanksgiving because his father had decided to make another reappearance.

Wanting to allow his fiancé the time he needed to process everything he had just seen, Kensi decided to follow suit, walking to the kitchen and grabbing a bunch of vegetables to cut so she could help him speed up the cooking.

The next few hours passed in a tense silence, Kensi not sure if she should have cancelled their gathering, thinking that Deeks maybe wasn't up for visitors. And Deeks focusing completely on his cooking.

He now stood proudly looking at the turkey he had just taken out of the oven and looking at the time out of the corner of his eye, wanting to have everything ready when their family arrived. Turning to look at Kensi, a smile spread across his face as he caught sight of her. His mind going back to his father words and to the pictures he had seen. His heart flustered at the thought of having that sort of happy family with Kensi, one that unlike theirs wouldn't be matted by any spark of violence or lies. Walking behind her, he grabbed her hand and turned her around to look at him, a soft kiss following the gesture as he moved one hand to caress her cheek.

"Better?" She asked simply. Smiling back when Deeks nodded. "Thank you." She added a few minutes later.

"For what?" Deeks questioned, a frown developing on his face.

"Not running." She answered and Deeks smirked knowingly. "Thank you, for not going to Canada this time."

They both laughed at the thought, both of them wanting to keep the moment light but both of them aware of the growth that this day had meant for their relationship. Soon they would be getting married and this day was the perfect reassurance that a wedding was the right next step in their journey.

Deeks and Kensi then spent the next hour in between snuggling in the couch and checking the kitchen to make sure their food didn't burn because of their other activities. Both of them running to get re-dressed when the bell rang for the first time. Then walking hand in hand to open the door for whoever member of their family had arrived first.

"Will you ever visit him?" Kensi asked quickly before opening the door.

"I don't know, Kens. Part of me is curious of what he wants to say, but I don't know." Deeks answered sincerely.

"I can go with you, if you ever want to." Kensi said. Thinking that Deeks would never get a chance to meet her father, but she could have the chance to meet his. Even thought she knew it would be hard for her to keep an open mind and forget everything Gordon Brandel had put them through the last year. But throughout her life, she had learned that the only way to keep themselves still human after everything the job forced on them was to avoid clinging to a need for revenge and keeping an open mind. So, if Deeks ever decided to visit his father, and invited her to come along, she would do just that.

"Thank you." Deeks said, punctuating the words with a quick peck at her lips. The possibility of the visit to his father not discarded, but the detective knowing the time for that decision wasn't now. Today he would just enjoy another holiday with his family, and relish the gift of being alive, and free to finally do whatever he wanted.

Opening the door, he smiled at the wonder twins, a big pie that made Kensi's eye sparkled on Eric's hand, and a bottle of wine on Nell's. "Happy Thanksgiving." They both said in unison, moving in to hug their teammates, thanking them for hosting this gathering.

"Happy Thanksgiving." Callen and Sam replied as they came in from the driveway, Kam and Aiden snickering behind them, making Kensi and Deeks smile because they knew what it meant for Sam that his kids had managed to make it home. Deeks also secretly thinking to the future, as his deep-rooted desire to be better than his father again made him yearned for his hypothetical kids. One day he would give them everything he didn't have, and he would do everything in his power to preserve their innocence until he couldn't hold anymore. After all, that was the only reason why he still did this job.

Moving to close the door, Deeks stopped as his mother's SUV parked in front of their house and was not surprised when not only Bertie, but Julia exited the car. After all, the two women had bonded after Kensi's injury a few years ago and they had found new common ground in the last year as they helped them plan their wedding.

Hugging Julia and directing her to where the other's waited, Deeks moved in to hug his mother tightly. His mind again going back to his father.

"Are you okay?" Roberta asked knowingly as her son stepped away, the inquisitive mother searching his face for any sign of turmoil, both knowing what Thanksgiving meant to their family.

"Yeah, mama. Happy Thanksgiving." Deeks said honestly, knowing they would need to talk at some other time, but not wanting another of this holiday to turn into a family disaster.

Shaking her head, Roberta just handed Deeks her signature salad as she made her way into the house. Sensing that something was off about Marty but just attributing whatever it was to the significance of this day.

One hand holding his mother's salad, and the other moving to close the door behind him, Deeks took a second to stop at the door and take notice of his family inside his and Kensi's house. Roberta was now hugging Kensi as both women chatted with Julia, Nell and Eric worked on their audio system trying to set up some music, Callen and Sam served drinks for everyone, and Aiden and Kam played with Monty. The past might not have always been kind to Marty Deeks, but he had somehow managed to survive everything that life at thrown at him, and now he smiled, feeling more grateful that he had ever felt in his life and looking forward to the future with anticipation…

The End.

Thank you to everyone that has followed, favorited, reviewed, or just overall accompanied me through this journey, I hope you enjoyed it. I will never be able to put into words how much it has meant to me, just know that I will always be infinitely grateful. I never believed I could write, so I could never have done this without all your support and encouragement and I truly mean that.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone that celebrates!

Jess.