It was astounding that I didn't hate The Nutcracker after all these years and all these performances. Sure, the party scene was a bit of a snooze, but once Clara and the prince entered the snow forest, the ballet was just as magical to me as it was when my grandmother took me as a small child. Seeing the little girls in the audience with their fluffy dresses and tiaras always made me smile even as the month of performances dragged on. Yes, I still enjoyed it, but the performance schedule was an exhausting grind, going from Thanksgiving through New Year's Eve with one day off a week and some brutal three-show days.

I held back a sigh as I dragged the ghostlight out to center stage – December 23rd and only seven more days and nine more performances to go. Although I was almost asleep on my feet, I was thankful for that grind this year, for the unrelenting schedule that December brought. As I trudged home, I mentally calculated how much sleep I would get before heading out early the next morning. The urge to sleep in was strong, but tradition was tradition, and I'd be damned if I skipped it this year just because I'd be doing it alone. Although I tried not to think about it, a searing pang of sadness hit my heart and slowly dissipated, leaving an aching melancholy in its wake. As had been the case many times in the past few months, I found myself wiping tears away as I walked home.

"Pull it together, Swan," I muttered to myself as I reached the stoop of my building. As I walked into the front vestibule, I almost stepped on a bag of Cheetos. I was so focused on not grinding those to a fine, orange dust that I almost tripped over my very cute new neighbor who was kneeling on the floor, frantically trying to shove a multitude of junk food back into his grocery bag.

"Edward?"

"Bella…hey. Sorry about the mess," he said with a sigh and a blush.

"No problem. You're just lucky I'm still awake enough to notice instead of just stomping on everything, completely unaware." I knelt down and started handing him the last of the stray food. "Not to be nosy, but what is all of this?"

"Well you know…new job, new city. I decided not to go home for Christmas this year. A Christmas Eve food-a-thon seemed like a good idea, but I may have gone overboard."

"You think this is a food-a-thon? Oh, my young padawan, I have much to teach you about Philadelphia and food. Are you working tomorrow?" I asked with a laugh.

"No…why?"

"Be down here at seven tomorrow morning. It will be worth it, I promise."

Still yawning, I pulled on my coat as I walked down the stairs. Edward was already waiting in the front hallway, still a little sleep rumpled and bleary eyed and all the more adorable for it. His leather jacket accentuated his broad shoulders, and his morning scruff just added to how attractive he was. He was somehow adorably cute and totally sexy at the same time. I didn't know how that was possible, but Edward made it so.

"So Bella…where are we going? And is there coffee?"

"Is there coffee? Pfffffft. What kind of stagehand do you take me for? Of course there's coffee. And donuts. And all kinds of breakfasty foods. Now get a move on. I don't want to be late."

We walked through the quiet streets, stealing charged glances at each other and making small talk. I explained what I did backstage and the crazy schedule that December brought. He regaled me with stories from his office, which was located in the old Wanamakers building.

"No one thought to warn me about the holidays in the building. The first time the music and light show went off, I jumped so high, I nearly hit the ceiling!"

I was laughing so hard at this point that we had to stop walking so I could catch my breath. The Wanamaker light show with live organ accompaniment was a holiday season staple of every child who grew up in the Philadelphia area. I just never thought about the poor office tenants now that the building was split between office space and Macy's.

"Bella, the organ is so loud that the windows shake!" His eyes were wide, and it was obvious he hadn't gotten over the shock of the Wanamaker organ blasting through the office building. I honestly couldn't tell if he ever would.

"Okay, okay, you win. You definitely have the more annoying holiday work experience. I never thought I'd say that to anyone, but you win hands down. Oh, and we're here! We just have to go around to the right entrance."

"Bella, why does it say it opens at eight?"

"Because it opens at eight."

"Why are we here at 7:30? And why were you so worried about being late?"

"We're actually right on time. Just wait, Edward. You'll see."

We turned the corner onto 12th Street and walked down to the one door that was open. There were already a handful of people in line in front of us, but at least security was letting us wait inside this year.

Edward looked at the people in front of us and started laughing. "So you aren't the only crazy one?"

"Crazy smart, yes. You'll see."

The older gentleman in line in front of us smiled and turned to Edward. "Trust her on this one. She's absolutely right. Get here early, get the good stuff, and get out before it's absolutely insane."

"Ha! Told you so!" I stuck my tongue out at Edward, making both him and the older gentleman laugh. We passed the time chatting with him as the line continued to form behind us.

At 7:59 we heard someone in the front of the line excitedly say, "She's putting on her lipstick!"

Edward quirked an eyebrow at me. "Are you going to explain why that is a big deal?"

The line started to move as I quietly explained about the old Italian lady who ruled the Termini's counter with an iron fist. She always put her lipstick on just before they opened up for the day. Strange as it was, it was also reliable and, to me, signaled the beginning of one of my favorite parts of the holidays. Once we were allowed into the main part of the terminal, we lined up against the glass case of pastries that stretched the length of the counter.

Edward looked like a little kid, eyes wide at all of the choices of amazing desserts. I gave him a nudge and nodded toward the guy with a large plastic barrel of homemade cannoli shells, methodically filling them and putting them on trays. The comparative quiet of the bakery while we were waiting was suddenly filled with bustle and chatter. Whiffs of vanilla and sugar from the ricotta being piped were entwined with the smell of cinnamon from the shells and espresso from the tiramisu. The golden-brown pastry from the sfogliatella shone under the lights and promised flaky, buttery goodness with a smooth, creamy center. The smells, the sights, the sounds – it really never got old. There was something almost reassuring about it. Termini's had pretty much been the same for decades and would hopefully remain a constant for years to come. One of these days when I won the lottery, I would order one of everything they had, but until then, some hard choices needed to be made.

As I narrowed our picks down and ordered our desserts and cannoli from the no-nonsense older woman behind the counter, I could tell by the look in Edward's eyes that he was quickly falling in love with this place, quirks and all, just like I had the first time I experienced the ordered chaos of Christmas Eve at Termini's.

He had been so engrossed with everything at Termini's that he hadn't been paying attention to everything else around us. When we stepped away from their stall, bakery boxes in hand, he got his first good look at Reading Terminal Market and his jaw dropped.

"Holy shit, Bella. I get it."

"This might just be my favorite place in the city. I have to say hi to someone, and then we can wander and get whatever looks good."

We made our way over to one of the other bakeries, where I asked the young woman in front if Mrs. Cope was working. She came out of the back, grumbling about having things to make, before looking up and seeing us. She came around front and wrapped me in a large hug.

"Bella! Maureen, bring out two large coffees! Bella – you know the drill. Go pick out something for yourself and for your young man here."

"Mrs. Cope, you don't have to. Really. I just wanted to make sure I stopped by before it got too crazy."

"Don't be ridiculous. You got cookies from me when I worked in Charlie's office, and I'm damn sure you get cookies from me when I have my own bakery. Oh, my girl, it is wonderful to see you. It's been months since you've been by. How have you been holding up?"

"I'm, um…fine. Busy, you know, with The Nutcracker and all."

Mrs. Cope looked over at Edward and turned back to me, raising an eyebrow at my cageyness, but luckily let it go. "Well, you come back when we both have some time, and we'll catch up." She gave me another warm hug and murmured quietly in my ear, "You're doing great, Bella. I know it doesn't feel like it, but you are. I'm proud of you. He'd be proud of you." She released me from her tight hug and looked into my eyes. She must have been satisfied with what she saw because she stroked my cheek and nodded. "You be good, girl." And with a hurried turn, she whisked herself away into the back of her bakery.

We collected our treats and our coffees from the harried girl at the counter. I could feel Edward sneaking glances at me as I fixed my coffee the way I liked. It was a struggle, but I was able to hold my tears back. I appreciated him letting me pull myself together without prying. If I had to explain why I was so emotional, I would dissolve into a puddle of tears right there on the cement floor.

"Ready to show me your next culinary delight?" he gently teased. Once I nodded, he squeezed my hand, smiled gently at me, and said, "Well then, lead on, Macduff."

We sipped our coffee as we wandered the market, stopping anywhere that looked remotely interesting. I managed to convince him that there really was no such thing as too much cheese after choosing several from various shops. And of course that meant a stop at the Metropolitan bakery for bread to go with it. We both picked up sandwiches at Hatville's to have later for lunch because why settle for mediocre sandwiches at home when you can have amazing ones from here? The final stop was the Amish bakery to get sticky buns for Christmas morning.

"Edward, you have a choice to make. A very serious choice."

"Oh really?" he asked.

"Oh yes, and it has far-reaching consequences," I responded with mock seriousness. "Do you want to go to the Down Home Diner for breakfast, or do you want to grab some donuts and go sit outside since it's not too cold out?"

"Oooooh that is serious," he replied while stroking his chin and contemplating his choices. "I think I need more information. These donuts… Tell me about them." I spun him around so that he was facing the donut stand. Once he got a glimpse at the menu board, he turned to me and said, "Holy shit! Donuts. We're doing donuts. Lots of donuts."

After he got a half dozen to try and I got a dozen to bring to the theatre later, we headed outside laden down with bags just as the terminal was beginning to get packed. Once we got out the door, Edward looked at me with a goofy smile on his face. "Crazy smart, Bella. You are crazy smart. Where to next?"

I led him down Arch Street to Thomas Paine Plaza, watching his eyes widen comically as we climbed the steps up to the concrete plaza. He took in the weird array of sculptures, from the huge Afro Pick to the oversize game pieces, to the towering Government of the People statue, all with City Hall standing in the background. It was weird and wonderful, and although many people hated it, I thought it was perfectly Philly.

"So I know most people would choose LOVE park, but I like this plaza for how weird it is," I explained. "Plus the Christmas Village thing they do is over there right now, and I try to stay far away."

"No, this is great!" Edward got to work, opening up the donuts and cutting a peanut butter cream one in half. He took a bite, and his eyes just about rolled back in his head. "Mmph… Oh my God. This is amazing! Try it!"

We sat there and laughed and ate and celebrated our success at the market that morning. Way too soon, I glanced at my phone and realized that duty called.

"Ugh… I have to go over to the Academy of Music to prep for the matinee. Can you do me a favor? Take the refrigerated stuff home with you so I don't have to guard it from hungry stagehands? I'll pick up my stuff from you when I get home around six."

Edward looked confused for a moment. "I kind of assumed we'd be hanging out together tonight? I understand if you don't want to, I just thought…uh… Yeah. I understand."

"No, no, no… I want to. I didn't want to assume… I, uh… I'd really like that." I could feel myself blush as I responded because if I was being completely honest, the more time I spent with Edward, the more I wanted to spend time with Edward. The times I'd seen him in the building, I definitely noticed he was good-looking, but I never had more than a quick, passing conversation with him. There was a little spark between us when I had seen him in the past, but that spark had grown throughout the morning into full-fledged electricity. At this point, there was nothing I wanted more than to spend Christmas Eve with this nice, funny, and smart guy.

We gathered our trash and walked to the front of the plaza, where I casually flipped off the statue of Frank Rizzo, making Edward laugh.

A guy passing by yelled, "You know it, girl!" which brought even more laughter from Edward.

"What? It's tradition in my family, Edward. He was a racist asshole who was awful for this city."

"Well, who am I to mess with tradition, then?" Edward flipped the statue a double bird, much to my delight. He was rewarded with a whoop from the guy on the sidewalk.

"Why don't you give me everything but the donuts and your lunch? I'll catch a cab and take it all home with me."

"Perfect!" I replied.

He stopped for a moment, put the bags down, and grabbed on to my hand. "Yes, perfect," he said quietly while looking at me intently. "Thanks for asking me to come with you. I enjoyed myself more than I have since I moved here."

He reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear that had slipped loose from my hat. As his hand brushed my cheek, I felt an electric shock run through my body and down to my toes. I gasped and looked up into his intense gaze. He slowly bent his head down as I rose on my tiptoes, our lips meeting in a sweet kiss that even in its relative chasteness was filled with passion and promises – promises of more kisses, more electricity, more passion…more everything.

We slowly pulled away from each other; the happiness in his face echoing what I'm sure was showing on mine.

"Wow," he whispered as he caressed my cheek.

"Pajamas," I said and then realized what I had blurted out. "I mean, yes, wow. Very wow. Lots of wow." I was mortified.

His eyes crinkled at the corners as he grinned at me. "I like lots of wow. Do you want to explain pajamas, though?"

"Tonight. No clothes allowed. Wait…no! That's not what I meant! Ugh! Pajamas! Wear pajamas." I put my head in my hands in total embarrassment.

He pulled my hands away and was grinning down at me. "Pajamas – got it. Now go to work, and I'll get all of this home."

He flagged a cab, and we loaded all of our goodies into the trunk. He opened the back door to get in and then turned to me with a wicked smile on his face and a gleam in his eye. "By the way, Bella, I was fine with no clothes allowed." And with that, he ducked into the cab and closed the door while I stood there with my mouth agape and my legs turning to jelly as it pulled away from the curb.

I heard laughter behind me, and the guy who saw us flip off the statue earlier was waiting for his bus. "Girl, you're going to have yourself one Merry Christmas, mark my words."

A goofy grin broke out across my face. "You saw that, right? I didn't imagine it? I will be so pissed if I wake up and this was just a dream." The guy just nodded at me with smile on his face. "Holy crap. I think you might be right? I think this might actually happen!" I giggled and wished him Happy Holidays and then set off for the theatre.

Since I was a little early, I decided I'd go in the front to wish the guys in the box office a Merry Christmas. While I was in the office, I saw a little girl with her grandmother picking up tickets for the matinee. She had her hair in ringlets, was wearing a fancy dress, and clutched a nutcracker in her hands. She looked a lot like me when I was little, and her grandmother obviously adored her. I thought about my grandmother and how much seeing The Nutcracker ended up shaping my life. I also thought about Charlie and how he tried to do little things for people that would bring a little joy to their lives. When John pulled their ticket envelope from the rack, I touched his arm.

"Where are their seats, John?" I asked quietly.

"Up top, B. Why?"

"Are we holding back any company seats for emergencies that we can move them to? I'll pay the difference."

John looked at me and smiled, his normal grizzled countenance transforming into delight. He looked in the computer and then nodded at me and printed out the tickets.

"Sorry for the delay, ma'am. Here are your tickets. And I hope you enjoy the show, young lady!"

She looked in the envelope, and her eyes widened. "These aren't my seats. I can't afford—"

"There is nothing to afford, ma'am. The Sugar Plum Fairy must have worked some of her Nutcracker magic," he said with a twinkle in his eyes.

The little girl gasped. "Grandmommy! The Sugar Plum Fairy! From the Land of Sweets!"

John winked at the grandmother. "You're right, young lady! And sometimes, when she knows a special little girl is coming to the ballet, she works her magic out here too."

As the grandmother walked off, slowly shaking her head in disbelief, John turned to me. "You just made that little girl's day, B."

"She reminded me of me at that age. And, you know…Charlie would have done it if he was here."

John kissed me on my cheek. "You're one of the good ones, B. Do you have somewhere to go tonight? It's our turn to do the feast of the seven fishes for the family, and you are more than welcome."

I smiled at him. "I'm good. I have plans."

"Now that's a smile I like to see. It's been missing for far too long. Have a good day off, okay?"

"You too, John. Give my love to Marie and the kids." I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek before leaving the box office and making my way backstage. I was a little teary, but I was floating on a cloud from the kiss from Edward and the excitement of that little girl.

What a difference from last night. I hurriedly dragged the ghostlight out to center stage, rushed out the door, and did a bit of a speed walk back to my building. I went upstairs and did a quick rinse off in the shower and then changed into my Christmas pajamas. They weren't fancy, but then again, neither was I. A quick swipe of mascara, and I was ready to go. I grabbed the few things I'd need, headed up the stairs to Edward's place, and knocked on his door.

It swung open, and my God… Edward in plaid pajama pants and a T-shirt that showed off his muscular arms should come with a warning label. If I thought his jacket showed off his shoulders before, I was not prepared for the reality of a thin shirt stretched tight between them. I took in the hair in untamable disarray, bright green eyes twinkling at me, and easy grin on his face. He was gorgeous and cozy and unf… Everything a woman would want to spend Christmas Eve curled up with.

"Hi," he said quietly. He kissed me on the lips and ushered me into his apartment. "You brought a frying pan?" he asked.

"Yep. I wasn't sure what you had. I also have latke mix and sour cream."

He took everything in my hands and put them on the kitchen breakfast bar, right inside the door, and then pulled me close against him. "Now that's better."

"Mmmm, much," I said as I wrapped my arms around his neck. He leaned down to kiss me again, and things quickly heated up. I tugged at his hair and groaned as his kisses and tongue and little nips drove me insane. I tried to move against him but ended up backing him against the wall instead. He pulled away slightly, breathless, his pupils wide and dark, but then leaned back down, seemingly unable to stay away from kissing me.

"Shouldn't…we…eat or something…first?" he stuttered out between kisses and then moved down to nipping my neck.

I groaned and breathlessly asked, "Edward, are you actually hungry right now?"

He looked up from my neck, his eyes intense in their want. He reached down and cupped my ass, holding me against his obvious erection. "For food? No." He had the most devilish smirk on his face.

"Good. Eat later. Kiss me now."

He pulled me into an embrace, kissing me senseless as he backed into his apartment. We were walking and kissing and groping and trying to get rid of clothes. We both had our shirts off by the time we made it to the living room.

"Do you want to—"

"Couch, Edward."

"Are you sure? Because we could go into the bedroom."

"Bedroom later, couch now."

He fell onto the couch, and I quickly straddled him. He apparently wasn't wearing underwear, and neither was I, so there was only two flimsy pieces of clothing between us. I could feel every inch of his rather impressive cock as I ground myself against him, moaning as he licked and nibbled my neck while also alternating between squeezing my breasts and tweaking my nipples through the lace of my bra. He finally reached around and unclasped my bra, instantly taking one of my nipples in his mouth. He grabbed my ass and pulled me even tighter against him, guiding my movements as I continued to rub on his cock. I licked and nibbled his neck and ear lobe, eliciting a groan that reverberated straight through me. I slowly raised myself off him, shifted slightly, and lay back on the couch, beckoning to him. He lay between my legs and nestled himself between my hips. As we continued to kiss and move against each other, I wrapped my legs around him and started to push his pajama pants off his ass using my feet. He quickly got the hint and pulled his pants off, and what a beautiful sight. He was sex personified, standing there gloriously naked and gazing down at me hungrily. He reached for my pants and pulled them off me and then stood there, eyes blazing with fire.

"Fuck, Bella. You're gorgeous."

"Get back down here, Edward. You can look all you want later."

He started to rejoin me on the couch and suddenly paled.

"Fuck. Condoms."

"I'm on the pill and clean."

"I'm clean. Are you sure you're okay with this? I can run to the corner."

"Edward, if you leave right now, I will never forgive you."

"Well, we wouldn't want that now, would we?"

And with that, he lifted my leg and kissed the inside of my ankle. Ever so slowly, he moved up my legs, his hands caressing, his lips and tongue leaving a trail of fire in their wake. When he reached the apex of my thighs, he stroked up and down before slowly slipping two fingers inside me. He leisurely pumped them in and out, curling them a little, watching me gasp and moan before putting his mouth on my clit and sucking gently.

"Edward!" I exclaimed in surprise. It was as if every nerve in my body was suddenly connected to the small bundle he was sucking. I tried moving my hips, but he held them down while he continued his ministrations. His mouth on my clit and his fingers continuing to pump in and out of me had me unable to focus on anything specific. All I could feel was a jumble of sensations that had my body humming, my skin tingling, and my muscles tightening. As I moaned and panted, I could feel the pleasure intensifying until I was right on that brink, right on the precipice, and then suddenly I was falling and trembling, a guttural moan escaping my lips.

I was vaguely aware of him kissing my hip and languidly moving up my body until he was lying on top of me. As I shook off my post-orgasmic haze, he kissed me gently. His kisses intensified, leaving me utterly breathless. He entered me slowly while his heated, intense gaze never wavered from my face. The slowness plus the intensity of the connection between us made it seem like I could feel every nerve ending in my body and every inch of him as he slid inside me. Once he was fully seated, his hips flush against mine, I realized just how very right this felt.

"Oh God. This feels so…right," I said with a moan.

"So right, Bella." He slid back out and in, setting a slow and steady pace.

It was wonderful, but not what I was craving – what I hadn't been able to stop thinking about since he kissed me that morning.

"Edward?"

"Bella?"

"Fuck me. Please fuck me. We can go slow next time, but I really want you to fuck me."

A devastatingly sexy grin came across his face as he laced his fingers in mine and held my arms in place beside my head, pinning me. He quickly picked up the pace and intensity of his thrusts, giving me exactly what I was begging him for. He put one of my legs up on his shoulder and thrust hard and fast, instinctively knowing how to position us so that his pelvis was hitting my clit. I could feel my muscles starting to tighten again, and the pleasure was flowing through me in waves that were increasing in intensity. I once again found myself at the precipice.

"Edward, please," I begged, not even knowing what I was asking him to do.

He reached forward and pinched my nipple as he thrust hard, sending me falling over the edge with a guttural shout and moan. And once I was done twitching from such an intense orgasm, his pace picked up again. I watched him as the pleasure overtook him and he threw his head back in utter bliss. When he opened his eyes, he lay back down on top of me and kissed me gently.

"Lots of wow, Bella. Lots of wow."

I giggled and gently placed an open-mouthed kiss on the side of his neck, groaning when he slipped out of me. I immediately missed that most intimate connection.

He shifted us so that I was lying half on top of him while he was stretched out on his back. We were both still a little out of breath when I heard him chuckle softly.

"Well that escalated quickly."

I lifted my head up and kissed him on the lips. "I'm totally okay with that."

He laughed. "Me too."

I snuggled in against him, content to just lie in his arms for a few more minutes. I hadn't noticed before because we were kind of preoccupied, but Edward had a small tree with white lights on it in his living room. Those were the only lights on in the room, and the glow from the Christmas lights added to the contentedly warm feeling inside me. He kissed the top of my head, and I smiled softly against his chest. Finally, I knew I had to get up and go to the bathroom. I gave him a soft kiss on his chest and clambered off of the couch as he groaned in disappointment. I grabbed his T-shirt and threw it on.

As I padded away, he said in a low voice, "That looks really good on you, Bella."

As I cleaned myself up in the bathroom, I heard Edward turn on some music and start moving around the kitchen. By the time I came out, he had plates and glasses on the coffee table and was just starting to pull our goodies out of the fridge. He was shirtless with just his pajama pants on. They were hanging low, and I could see more clearly just how gorgeous he was. He was tall and lean but had defined muscles on his torso and arms.

"Holy shit," I whispered, not meaning to say that out loud.

He looked at me and smirked. "I could say the same thing. Come here."

I walked into the kitchen, and he pulled me to him, giving me a scorching kiss. The kiss quickly turned into heavy panting and wandering hands. Just as things were starting to move toward some kitchen counter action, my stomach grumbled. He leaned his forehead against mine and closed his eyes.

"Right. Food." One more quick peck on my lips, and he turned back to the refrigerator, not so subtly adjusting himself as he did.

"Do you have oil? What about eggs?" I asked him, grabbing my supplies from the breakfast bar.

"Absolutely." He placed both on the counter for me. "So… latkes?"

I loved that he didn't think it was weird that even though we had a veritable bounty of food and snacks, I was still making something else.

"Yep! My mom's Jewish, so I grew up celebrating everything. I don't really get a chance to do this during Hanukkah because of work, so I started adding it to Christmas Eve. You know – celebrate Christmukkah. Or Christmukwanzukkah if you really want to piss off the war on Christmas folks."

He laughed. "Christmukwanzukkah does have a nice ring to it!"

He started unwrapping all of the food we bought while I started putting together the latke batter. We worked easily together in the kitchen, in contented silence with just the low sound of the Christmas music station in the background. I heated the oil and started dropping tablespoons of the batter in, letting the potato pancakes brown on each side before putting them on a plate between layers of paper towels.

"Ow! Shit!" I exclaimed when a pop of oil managed to get my arm. It didn't really hurt much; it just surprised me more than anything else. Edward turned off the stove and took my hand in his and tenderly led me to the sink, where he held my arm under cool water. Once the burn stopped throbbing as much, he placed a gentle kiss on the spot before covering it with a Band-Aid.

"I don't think we'll have to amputate," he said, teasing me. "I do, however, think we have enough latkes. Do you want to help me carry the rest of the things out to the living room?"

"Sure." I grabbed the plate of latkes, the container of sour cream, and the utensils and walked out to find the coffee table utterly full of cheeses and spreads and salads and everything that looked appealing that morning. "I think we may have overdone it."

"What are you talking about? Some crazy smart and beautiful woman told me there's no such thing as too much cheese."

We both start filling our plates, groaning in contentment as we tried each thing. There was a lot of, "Oh my God, try this" and "Holy shit, this is amazing" happening. We ate our fill and then some. As we sat back on the couch, fully sated, Edward put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me to him so that I was curled up against his side.

"I think I'm a fan of this tradition, Bella."

"I'd be a little worried if you weren't, Edward," I said, smirking at him.

"I'd show you how much a fan I am if I wasn't so full. I don't think I can move."

"That's okay. I like this part too."

He kissed me on the head. "Mmmmmm."

We sat there entwined and relaxed, listening to the music and watching the lights twinkle on his tree. Eventually we started talking about our families' traditions for the holidays, and I explained how once my parents split up, things were a little hodgepodge until I moved here in high school.

"So is that when this tradition started?" he asked.

"Well, kind of. Apparently my parents started it when they were still together. My dad would go and pick out whatever looked interesting, and they would eat while wrapping presents, putting together my toys, and stuffing my stocking. Then, when my parents got divorced and my mom and I moved away, we'd light the menorah for Hanukkah and have latkes. She and I usually took a vacation over the holiday break. She'd make sure I got a Christmas stocking and that we did something to celebrate the day, which was fine and all, but I really missed having a real Christmas. Then I moved in with Charlie in high school to go to CAPA – the high school for the arts here. He laid out this spread on my first Christmas Eve with him, and the tradition kept going." I could feel the tears coming to my eyes, and I tried to blink them back.

"Bella? What is it?"

"I'm sorry. This is just my first Christmas without him, and I…uh miss him? I miss him a lot." The tears spilled down my cheeks, and Edward held me tighter. "He died in May. He didn't suffer or anything, and I'm happy about that. It just…sucks, you know? It just really really sucks." I started to really cry then, and Edward pulled me into a tight hug, stroking my hair and murmuring in my ear until I started to calm down.

"I'm really sorry about that."

Edward wiped the tears from my cheeks. "What for? Missing your dad? Don't be ridiculous. Do you, um… Do you want to tell me about him? It's okay if you don't."

"No, I do. I really do. Charlie was quiet but said a lot with his eyes, you know? They would actually twinkle when he was amused by something. And if he loved someone, that love just shone through his eyes. He may have been a quiet guy, but I never doubted his love for me because I saw it every time he looked at me. He is…was, dammit…the smartest, kindest, funniest, and most stubborn person I've ever known." At this point both Edward and I had shifted so that we were facing each other. He held my hands in his, silently giving me comfort and strength to keep going.

"Even when he wasn't at his full strength last Christmas, he still went to Reading Terminal with me. He just couldn't do it all by himself at that point, and I think that really bothered him. He had enough of a problem with me going with him the year before – he loved surprising me with everything he found. Every year he'd find something amazing and different, except there was always cannoli from Termini's. And like we did today, he taught me to go there first to make sure you can get what you want."

Edward's eyes lit up with understanding, and he gave me a quick kiss. "Crazy smart, just like his daughter."

I blushed at the compliment. "People were intimidated by him because he could be gruff, but he really was a giant teddy bear. And he loved this city. He loved it so much. He knew every nook and cranny and all the internal machinations in City Hall. Reporters would call him on background for articles they wrote. He had no patience for idiots or bullshit, but he was kind to people he didn't even know. He'd be the guy who paid the toll for the car behind him. Or he'd make sure to smile at someone who was obviously having a rough day. And he flipped off the Frank Rizzo statue anytime he could." I gave a teary giggle.

Edward smiled in understanding and amusement. "Another Swan family tradition I can get behind."

I took a moment to compose myself before continuing. "That was my dad. He was my rock. When everything else was shitty, he'd be there, quiet and solid, giving me strength. The poor guy went to so much crappy theatre because he'd go to everything I worked on. And while he didn't always like the show itself, he was always proud of what I did for it. He knew it would be hard being female and working backstage, constantly having to prove myself until I built up a solid reputation. Yet he never doubted that I would do it. I asked him one time if he was disappointed that I didn't do something more normal for work." I took a moment so that a sob wouldn't overtake me. "He told me that as long as it made me happy, that's all he cared about. He was pretty great."

"He sounds amazing, Bella. Like he was a really special man and father. I would have loved to have gotten the chance to know him, and not just because he was your dad."

We sat in silence for a few minutes – me lost in my memories and him content to wait for me to come back while gently stroking the back of my hand with his thumb. It was a quiet sign that he was there for me, and it meant more than he knew. Everyone had been supportive when Charlie died, but I never had a chance to just sit and talk about him like this.

Once I was focused on the present again, he asked, "Wait here for a second, okay?" He got up from the couch and went to the kitchen. He came back with a plate with two cannoli on it. He sat back down on the couch, lifted one off of the plate, and motioned to me to do the same.

"To Charlie."

I teared up again at him toasting my dad with a cannoli. It was so sweet and random and perfect. My dad would have loved it. "To Charlie."

I "clinked" my cannoli against his and then gave him a quick kiss before biting into the crunchy shell filled with creamy ricotta. It was just as amazing as it always was. I put it back on the plate and then moved my leg across Edward's lap and inched over so that I was eventually straddling him. I held his face between my hands and leaned my forehead on his.

"Thank you," I whispered and then kissed him, trying to communicate just how much his little gesture had meant to me.

"I'm here anytime you want to talk, Bella. Anytime. I wish I could have met Charlie, but I like getting to know him through you."

I moved slightly so that I was off to the side but still sprawled across his lap. I tried to hold it in, but I let out a mighty yawn. "Sorry."

"All right, let's get you to bed." Edward got up and started clearing off the coffee table, and I joined him, bleary eyed, as we put everything back in the fridge and the dishes in the sink. Once everything was put away, he grabbed my hand and led me to the bedroom. I crawled into his big, comfortable-looking bed, and sank into the mattress, cocooning myself in the duvet covering it.

"Comfy?" he asked.

"I'm never leaving this bed," I said with another yawn.

"I think I'm okay with that."

I was already half asleep when I felt the mattress dip and Edward's arm pulling me against him.

"Yay little spoon!" I quietly cheered, and Edward laughed.

"So what are we doing tomorrow, Bella?"

"Same thing we do every night, Pinky. Oh…you were serious. I dunno. Sleep. More sex. Food. Sleep more. Maybe go see the lights down on 13th Street." I yawned again but loudly this time.

"Sounds perfect to me."

I smiled and snuggled in deeper, feeling warm and cared for and safe for the first time in months. And just as I was drifting off, I felt a gentle kiss on my head and heard a quiet "Merry Christmukkah, Bella."

A million thank yous to Drotuno and JenRar who stepped in at the very last minute to preread and beta this for me. Belladonna Cullen also preread and checked my Philly details. It was thanks to drinks with with her that this was even written in the first place. This fandom has brought the most wonderful people into my life, and I'm forever grateful.

I wrote this to see if I could (it's been a while) and also as a way to honor my dad and my grandmommy. He taught me the glory of Reading Terminal on Christmas Eve and waiting in line at Termini's as well as a healthy amount of disgust for Frank Rizzo. She took me to The Nutcracker in New York when I was little and I've loved it ever since. I love and miss them both immensely.