A/N: I am LIVING for this ship. Seriously. Kill me.

Post TLJ. Reylo.

One:

Rey turned over in her cot, scowling into the darkness. Months had passed like minutes as they tried to rebuild the Resistance from the burning embers that remained. As it turns out, rebuilding a military force and running from the First Order while simultaneously being The Last Jedi, as people had begun titling her—mostly against her will—was all very exhausting. Rey hadn't anticipated the level of authority she'd be given or the amount of people that would rely on her, as if she, a scavenger from Jakku, was the next Luke Skywalker. Not that she was downplaying herself… she knew that if she was a refugee fleeing from the tyranny of the First Order and it's new Supreme Leader, she would have looked at herself the same way. But it felt foreign, and ultimately more draining than anything she'd ever experienced before.

So why can't I ever sleep?

She sighed and pulled her blanket over her face, ignoring that tugging feeling in the back of her mind that held the answer.

With a defeated huff, Rey rose from her bed and made her way to the observation deck of the Resistance's newest spacecraft. It was nowhere near the size of their previous vessel, according the Finn and Poe, but it was the largest craft Rey had ever been on… if she didn't count any of the First Order's ridiculously large, unpractical ships. And she didn't.

As Rey slipped into the room, she quietly celebrated its emptiness and sat against the cold bench overlooking the vast horizon of the galaxy. She could never grow tired of the stars. There was undeniable beauty out there, and she relished in it. Especially since things grew darker with each passing day.

The new Supreme Leader saw to that.

A pang of unwarranted sadness hit Rey suddenly and she cursed herself for letting herself slip up for the second time that night. She made a point to never think of Ben—she shook her head—of Kylo Ren unless she was working. When she stood at the war table with General Organa and Poe, she could think of him as the looming threat he was, as the monster he was. But when she was alone, she couldn't swallow the hurt and betrayal she felt at the simple thought of him.

And once she began thinking about him, it was nearly impossible to stop.

Her mind raced backwards in time, to the fateful moment in Snoke's chamber, when she stared up at him as he raised his lightsaber to cut her down. To do his master's bidding. To become the true villain she just didn't want him to be. And then… he didn't. He cut his master in two. And although she knew he never would have admitted it, he didn't just do it to vanquish his puppet master, he did it to save her. She could feel it down to her bones, radiating through his soul and, in turn, hers. They were still connected in that moment, through Snoke's trickery, by the Force. He saved her. And just moments later, betrayed her again.

Despite how it all ended, Rey couldn't deny that fighting side by side with him, working in perfect harmony with one another, would be a moment she would cherish for the rest of her life. It was her favorite memory since her new life had begun, since she found BB-8 on Jakku. Nothing could compare. She had thought she was alone up until that moment. He showed her, in his backwards way, that she wasn't.

And then when he held out his hand to her… asking her to join him, and effectively severing whatever chance she may have had to bring him back to the Light, he showed her again that she wasn't alone. Even without him. She remembered Finn. She remembered her friends. She remembered that, at least for now, he was the Darkness she'd have to face.

Rey stopped herself, at least for now? Listen to me, I'm going insane…

Ben Solo was gone. Whatever part of him that had lingered was cut down by his own self-serving hatred.

Only Kylo Ren remained.

She needed to remember that.

Even so, Rey clung to every memory of him like she might forget the moments they'd shared on Ahch-To through the Force. When she'd screamed at him in the pouring rain, when he listened to her woes and they touched, ever so slightly, through the boundaries and fabric of space. When he'd surprised her by appearing slick and shirtless before her and refused to cover himself. Those memories were special to her, even if their bond had been a lie. She never wanted to forget.

Rey sighed again and leaned forward, resting her elbows against her knees. She tried to free her mind of these thoughts; they were inherently dangerous. She knew that. So she gazed out into the stars, hoping to find solace where there was none. Before long though, she gave up and retreated back to her quarters, hoping sleep would finally find her.

And it did, eventually. She lulled off into a dreamless, restless slumber, only to be woken less than an hour later by the buzzing lights in her quarters, signaling the start of the day.

She wasn't sure how much more of this she could take—if something were to happen, if the First Order were to find them or they were to get attacked by raiders, she worried she wouldn't be at her full potential. In fact, she knew she wouldn't be. Over the months her sleep had slowly began to suffer, coming to her later each night than it had the last, but she'd always managed to be well rested enough to fully function without the grogginess. But recently… it was like there was something keeping her awake and at bay. She was lucky to get any sleep at all most nights. She operated in a permanently exhausted state and eventually, after a few days, she'd crash and cash in her sleep debt.

Initially she thought the source of her insomnia had to do with the new living situation. A new ship, a new environment, more responsibilities to attend to… but as she acclimated to her new schedule, her sleep continued to suffer rather than recover.

As Rey stumbled from her bed and forced herself to get dressed, she found it difficult to keep her eyes open long enough to slip her legs into her boots.

I'm going to go crazy, at this rate… she mumbled to herself.

Finally, realizing that dressing was difficult enough, Rey resigned herself to asking General Organa for a late start to catch up on her sleep.

She found Leia on the Bridge, leaning over the center table, a thoughtful look on her aged face. "Rey," she greeted her enthusiastically but her smile faltered when she lifted her eyes to meet Rey's heavy-lidded ones. "You've certainly looked better." She said with a purse of her lips. Her words were teasing but the concern behind them was genuine.

Rey tried to smile but even that proved too tiring, "I didn't sleep… well." She said, trying to slap some life into her face.

"Clearly," Leia answered with mild amusement, "You've been looking especially drained recently, are you doing alright?"

Rey nodded and explained her insomnia the best she could manage, hoping her words didn't slur together too much.

Leia was silent for a long, thoughtful moment, "Have you felt anything?" She asked in a hushed voice, "A disturbance in the Force?"

Rey blinked, finding herself slightly more awake at the General's serious tone. She hadn't thought of her sleep deprivation in that way at all… but if the Force was trying to show her something, she couldn't pinpoint what it was. "No," Rey answered, "Nothing like that, not that I can think of."

She nodded but pursed her lips in contemplation, "I want you to go back to your room and rest, I need you at your best."

Rey dipped her head gratefully, eager to crawl back into her blankets, and started back to the hallway.

"Oh, and Rey," General Organa called over shoulder, "The Force will guide you, if you let it. Now, off to bed with you."

Rey nodded once more and headed back to her quarters, sleepily contemplating the Generals words. Could the Force help her figure out what was causing her insomnia or was it the cause, warning her of something she couldn't see yet?

A hundred questions raced through her groggy brain as she made her way back into her bed, not even bothering to undress before crawling under the covers, boots and all.

For the first time in a long time, Rey dreamt. And somehow, she could feel Ben deep in the recess of her mind. Like he was seeing what she was seeing as a fantasy played out under her eyelids.

Rey stifled a laugh, watching Ben swing a green lightsaber around the training quarters. His form was excellent, but there was something so funny about watching him concentrate so deeply. It warmed her down to the core, she couldn't help but laugh.

He turned and gave her a disapproving frown, embarrassment hidden under his scowl.

"Don't mind me," Rey said, suppressing a smile and pulling her lightsaber back up to the ready position, returning to her practice forms.

"What are you laughing at?" His voice was practically a hiss.

"Nothing, shouldn't you be practicing?"

He cocked an eyebrow at her but returned to his task regardless.

Rey watched him over her shoulder every now and then, wishing she could keep this ingrained in her memory forever. His black hair, slicked back from hours of exertion, small beads on sweat running down his ivory face… dark eyes creased with focus, lips pressed into a taught line until he swung his saber and they parted with a sharp exhale.

She felt like she could cry at any moment, overcome by the unfamiliar happiness that radiated from him.

If things had been different, if he'd joined her in the Light, maybe this was a reality she could have witnessed…

And then suddenly, the scenery grew dark, Ben morphed into his black robes, and Rey found herself standing beside him in the wreckage of a battlefield, bodies littered the ground. Each of them wore the face of the Supreme Leader, Snoke. Fire raged around them but Rey wasn't afraid. She was her strongest self in that moment, powerful and clad in black like he was. She felt whole.

Kylo Ren turned to her, dark eyes dripping with satisfaction at their conquest. They'd eliminated the real enemy. Together. 100 times over. They could do it again, as many times as they needed. And they would before their time together was done.

"This is our power," Ren's voice rang proudly and boomed over the crackling of the surrounding flames.

Rey didn't need to speak. She knew he was right, and she couldn't deny just how good it felt being shoulder to shoulder with him, no matter what they'd face. In one swift motion she reached up to him and placed her small hand on his scarred cheek. He leaned into her palm, eyes fluttering shut for a split second.

He blinked himself back into reality and peered into her eyes. She felt his happiness again, but it was colder now, almost detached. His happiness emanated from her presence at his side, not by their fallen enemies. But there was something else, too. It reeked of regret, and Rey found herself drowning in it. She felt his pain like it was her own.

"What?" She whispered, hand still firmly planted against his face, thumbing his pale skin under her finger. All she wanted to do was to make him stop hurting— why was he looking at her like that?

His expression morphed into sheer panic, twisting with horror. He placed his hand on top of hers like he wanted to savor the sensation and spoke in a slow, shaky voice, "I've ruined you, haven't I?" It was a question but he wasn't looking for an answer, his words fell from his lips hurriedly, "I can hardly feel it, now… it's gone, I took it. I… Why did you let me me take it from you?" He shook his head as her expression changed to meet his accusations, "Your Light," he growled, anger unfurling inside him, "You were right to leave me."

Rey's eyes burned, suddenly angry herself. What was he talking about? She didn't leave. She was here, at his side, like he wanted, like she wanted. And now he suddenly cared about her Light? She'd snuffed it out, like he taught her. Because somewhere deep down she felt the truth in his beliefs, even if they were contorted in agony. "I'm here," She insisted. She just needed him to see, how could she make him see?

Ren shook his head, "No, Rey, you're not. I only wish you were."

Realization flooded her consciousness, and everything around her grew dark. Ren faded slowly, dissolving under her touch until she was alone in the blackness of her mind.

She dropped her hand to her side and lowered her head in shame—

It wasn't real. None of it was. Not the Light she imagined in Ben, not the Darkness she felt in herself. It was all in her head. And… in his.

Rey pulled herself back into the waking world, unsure how she was supposed to feel. She wanted to be angry. Those dreams were inexcusable. She had never felt such a strong pull to the Dark side since she'd discovered her affinity to the Force. Even when Kylo Ren had held his hand out to her and begged her to join him, to rule the galaxy by his side, the pull hadn't been quite as strong. And even in that lapse of judgement, when she longed to take his hand, she knew she couldn't. She knew it was wrong, he was wrong, and she couldn't abandon her friends. Not even for him, not for anything.

She stared up at her ceiling, contemplating. Something about her dream was bugging her—it was her own, she couldn't deny it. And she felt the slightest bit of shame at her own confession… but something was off. It belonged to her but, at the same time, it didn't. It was a feeling she couldn't quite put her finger on. It almost felt like…

Like it belonged to Ben too.

Kylo Ren, she suddenly corrected herself with a sigh.

His dreams, his wishes, his fears, they all felt like her own. They had merged with her, albeit briefly, during the span of her sleep. It was comforting and unsettling all at once... The idea that their connection might still exist somewhere, deep within the Force, pulled a smile to her lips and at the same time, filled her chest with dread.

Rey knew he'd felt it too.

And she was terrified of what he may do.

A/N: I'm thinking this (whatever it is) is all going to be told from Rey's point of view.. But we'll see where my brain goes as I keep writing. If you made it this far, thanks for reading!

Review?