Chapter Three: At the Burrow
Mrs. and Mr. Weasley had rented a large marquee tent for the occasion. Magically suspended fairy lights twinkled all around. Many guests had left once the sun had begun to set. Hagrid had long ago passed out in his own magically enlarged chair. His snores could be heard throughout the tent. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had gone to bed after their children had emphatically promised them that they would clean up before they left. A blonde woman with protuberant eyes and her wand tucked behind her left ear kissed a willowy strawberry-blonde teenager on the cheek. The teenager passed the towheaded baby to the woman with the wand. A dark haired older man holding an identical towheaded baby wrapped the teenager in a one-armed hug.
"Bye Harry. Happy birthday!" Luna called as her husband said goodbye to their frequent babysitter.
"Thank you Luna. You four travel safe, Rolf," Harry called back. The dark haired man nodded to Harry as he released Victoire from a hug.
Seeing that she was no longer occupied, a turquoise haired youth made his way over to Victoire. As soon as she saw Teddy, she abruptly left the tent. The remaining adults could see the blush creeping up her cheeks. Teddy, shocked by her quick pace, stopped and watched her walk away with a look of confusion plastered on his face.
A group of a dozen adults was seated at one of the large tables. They all were nursing goblets of elvin wine and remnants of birthday cake laid on plates in front of them. The watched the interactions between Victoire and Teddy with varying degrees of interest. Once Victoire had left the tent and Teddy stood at the entrance, well out of earshot, George Weasley, with his arm slung casually over his wife's shoulders, turned back towards the small party.
"Now normally, I would assume it was Ron who was going around ruining teenage romances, but this time I know it's Harry's fault. Now tell me Harry, are you offering lectures on private broom cupboards to all of us or is it only Teddy who is the beneficiary of such advice?"
"Held that in until after cake, did you George?" Harry asked as he leaned back and rubbed the bridge of his nose.
George grinned evilly.
"You should be grateful, Harry. He's been bursting ever since Sunday." Angelina supplied.
"Small miracles," Harry mumbled.
"George, be nice. Most of the Auror Department has already given Harry a good ribbing. They plastered copies of the article to his desk and they all made a sign," Hermione scolded.
"What did the sign say, Hermione?" George pleaded.
Hermione sent one apologetic look to Harry. "It said 'Romantic Advice Offered Here, On Sickle per Twenty Minutes,'' Hermione said. Once she finished, she immediately covered her mouth failing to hold back a laugh. George roared with laughter and the rest of the table joined in. Harry groaned.
"I still don't understand why you had to have another talk with Teddy. Surely, the topic's already been covered at Hogwarts by now." Audrey asked Harry. Immediately, all the people at the table, excluding Fleur, became rather engrossed in the bottom of their goblets. Audrey rounded on her husband. "Students have already sat through a sexual education seminar before their sixth year, right?" she demanded of Percy.
Percy looked incredibly sheepish as he made eye contact with his wife, but it was Neville who spoke. "Hogwarts doesn't offer a sexual education course," he said nervously.
"Excuse me," Audrey turned on Percy once more. "You assured me that our girls would receive a complete education at Hogwarts, armed with everything they needed to navigate both of our worlds," Audrey hissed at Percy.
"That sort of information is typically left to the discretion of the parents," Percy mumbled dismally.
"And I'm sure wizarding parents are well known for their consistency in disseminating this information?" Audrey said sarcastically as she crossed her arms and leaned away from her husband.
"Well, I can't speak for all wizarding parents, but —" Percy started.
"And what does a child do if they're muggle born," Audrey demanded.
"They apparently start getting lectures at home before they've hit thirteen," Ron mumbled which earned him a slap in the arm from Hermione.
"Hogwarts has an extremely well-stocked library," Hermione supplied, trying to calm Audrey.
"And what wizarding parents lack in consistency, they sure to make up for in attentiveness after the fact," Neville's wife Hannah supplied.
"What do you mean?" Audrey asked, momentarily distracted.
"Well in my training, my healer-in-charge caught a case where a fifteen year old pair, having found their own broom cupboard at the girl's house, ran into a bit of trouble. She — erm — well she panicked, and somehow confused the incantation for scourgify with a permanent sticking charm. The two were stuck together in a compromising position for nearly a week." Hannah offered. Several faces around the table looked a bit green, Audrey looked horrified.
"How were the stuck?" Ron asked and he shoved his last forkful of cake into his mouth.
"Well the poor girl was simultaneously trying to clean him off and herself out so —"
"Perhaps it isn't the best moment for such details, love. I think we have some young eavesdroppers," Neville supplied. He nodded his head to the corner of the tent and the adults' attention was drawn to a long, flesh colored tube.
"James Sirius Potter," Ginny screeched. "I thought I had told you to turn all of them over," she grabbed the end of the flesh colored tube and pulled. Fred, Dominique, and James all attempted to run away, but Ginny was too fast. She grabbed James by the shoulder and escorted him out of the tent. She cast a muffliato charm around the table as she returned. "Sorry," she said to Hannah with a kind smile, her momenty anger having vanished, "please continue."
Hannah, who had just taken a bite of cake, waved her hand nonchalantly.
Audrey looked around the table with a look of horror on her face. "There really isn't any sort of sex ed at Hogwarts." All heads shook. She leaned back in her chair with a look of shock plastered on her face. She took a sip of wine, and then suddenly slammed her goblet down on table. "There really should be! I would have had no idea what to do with the box of rubbers me mum threw on my bed when I was sixteen if I hadn't had the cucumber-banana demonstration in secondary school."
Hermione had unfortunately been taking a rather large sip of wine which, at Audrey's outburst, had gone down the wrong way. She began coughing violently. Percy blushed silently next to Audrey.
"What do muggles do to cucumbers and bananas now?" Ron demanded with concern.
"Muggle contraception," Percy mumbled with palpable embarrassment.
Still looking confused, Ron turned towards Hermione expectantly. "It's sort of like a non-magical form of the personal barrier charm for the male partner," she mumbled as she failed to keep her deepening blush at bay. Ron seemed to contemplate the physics of this newfound knowledge as he leaned back in his chair.
"Well I theenk there should be some sort of sexual education in ze magical schools," Fleur said authoritatively. "Ze number of unwed teenage mothers I work with has tripled since I finished my training." She leaned back in her chair and looked at the rest of the adults expectantly.
George erupted in a fit of laughter. Fleur glared at him. "I'm sorry, Fleur, but now I can't stop imagining Neville leading a — what did you call it Aud — 'cucumbers and bananas demonstration' with a bunch of third years. I can't get that picture out of my mind, no offense Neville."
"None taken," Neville said as he put up his hands as if to ward off doing the presentation. "I can't imagine myself doing that either, and I really don't want to it."
"But of course a professor shouldn't do it. It should obviously be the matron who leads the seminar," Hannah quickly said. Fleur and Audrey readily nodded in agreement while Neville stared incredulously at his wife.
Harry slammed his elbows on the table and put his head in between his hands. He started to rub his temples with his thumbs. "All I wanted to do was to talk to Teddy, and now Hannah is going to receive daily Howlers because she's teaching contraceptive charms to third years."
"No, I probably wouldn't start until fifth year," Hannah thought aloud.
"The books say fifteen and fourteen is way too late!" Hermione supplied automatically
"She's right," Audrey nodded her head in agreement.
"What is wrong with bloody muggles!" Ron said as he slammed his hand on the table.
"Oi!" Percy scolded.
"Maybe, we just don't delude ourselves into thinking that our kids aren't shagging behind our backs and we just want them to be prepared," Audrey said cooly.
"I didn't mean —" Ron started. "I'm married to a muggle-born witch," He defended lamely.
"All I did was talk to Teddy," Harry lamented again having not moved his head from between his hands.
"Cheer up, Harry, it's your birthday," George said jovially. "And Percy and I are going to go get you another drink," George said as he indicated to his older brother to get up and help him. "Anyone else?" George diligently took the drink orders from others at the table.
"I hope there aren't any nosy little bugs here tonight! There's no way I'd be able to keep Skeeter from writing about this," Ginny laughed as she rubbed supportive circles on Harry's back.
Harry groaned morosely without looking up.
As George and Percy left the tent, George turned to his older brother. "I take it your intimately familiar with those muggle rubber contraptions Audrey was talking about," he teased.
Percy stormed ahead of George. "We are never, under any circumstances, going to discuss whether I am or am not familiar with them," he said caustically over his shoulder. George erupted into another bout of laughter.
Elsewhere near the Burrow, Victoire Weasley sat under a tree and watched the fairy lights twinkle in the distance. Her eleven-year old cousin sat next to her. "Okay, explain it to me once again, very slowly. Are you mad at Teddy?" Molly sighed.
"No," Vic replied as she looked down at her hands.
"Alright, so you kissed him at the World Cup —" Molly started.
"No, he kissed me," Vic corrected sharply.
Molly sighed once again. "Debatable, but okay. So you two kissed at the World Cup. And now, you're not talking to him."
"Exactly."
"So, was kissing him horrible?" Molly asked pleadingly.
"No," Vic sighed.
"Was it wonderful?" Molly asked again.
"Not really."
Molly threw her hands up in frustration. "Well, I don't know what to tell you. Why don't you just talk to him?"
"Because barely a week after he kissed me, he ran to Uncle Harry and asked him where he could go in Hogwarts to kiss other girls," Vic bemoaned.
"Ah, so you've seen the other article," Molly concluded triumphantly. She had no idea why it had taken Victoire all day to tell Molly how she was feeling.
"James took great delight in showing me that Teddy and I had made the papers yet again," Victoire said glumly.
Molly silently cursed her younger cousin. "But Vic, think about it. Teddy spends time with Uncle Harry, his grandmother, and us. When is he supposedly meeting these other girls who he's going to snog at Hogwarts?"
Stumped, Victoire finally confessed to the truth. "It's not just that. After the article came out, mum and I had the most horrible discussion. Molly, do you know how babies are really ma—"
"Vic, can we talk?" Teddy asked as he suddenly appeared in front of the girls. Vic blushed deeper than she ever had in her whole life.
Molly looked frantically between Teddy and Victoire. "You know, I think I hear Lucy calling me," she said suddenly and with a great deal of awkwardness. She stood and sent an encouraging look towards Vic as she quickly walked away from the pair.
Teddy took Molly's abandoned spot. Victoire tried to think of anything but what she and her mum had discussed last week in a failing attempt to encourage her blush to dissipate.
"You've been awfully quiet since the World Cup," Teddy started.
Vic nodded silently.
"Three weeks ago, I couldn't get you to shut up," he said with a smile. Victoire was fixated on her hands, so she did not see his grin.
"Hey," she said in a hurt tone.
"Kidding," Teddy said with a laugh as he held up his hand defensively. "I finally got you to speak, though" he said in a softer voice.
"Yeah, what a victory," she said sarcastically. She had managed to look him in the eye when he had playfully insulted her. She was even more confused to see that his eyes were the same color blue of hers. "How can you act like nothing happened," she accused without looking at him.
"I'm not," he said defensively. "I was waiting for you to come and talk to me."
"Well, I was waiting to see how I felt," she said with her arms crossed.
"So we were at an impasse," he said as he regarded her closed off form. She did not respond, she simply continued to stare at their outstretched legs. "Erm, are you any closer to figuring out how you feel?" Teddy asked as her silence became uncomfortable.
"I was. And then I learned that the whole bloody world knows all of our business." Vic said angrily. She blinked back tears.
"How do you mean?" Teddy asked.
"Don't play dumb."
"I'm not. What are you talking about?"
"The Prophet articles? We've been the stars of two articles by Rita Skeeter. Don't tell me you haven't seen them."
"Oh, those," Teddy laughed as he swatted away her concerns with a hand. "Those don't matter."
"How can you say that," Vic screeched. She jumped up to her feet. "Every single person who receives The Prophet knows we kissed. They know that Uncle Harry talked to you about —" she looked around to make sure no one else was around "— sex," she hissed. "They probably all think we're having sex."
"So what?" Teddy asked with a shrug of his shoulders.
"So what!" Vic repeated. "Are you serious?"
"Vic, let people believe what they want. Only we know what's really going on. And what's really going on is that you and I are friends, first and foremost. We may have kissed a little at the World Cup after we snuck some firewhiskey from our parents. And that's where we are," Teddy finished lamely with another shrug of his shoulders.
"You know, it's so easy for you to say all of that. You'll return to Hogwarts looking like some hero while I look like some everyday slag because people are assuming we're doing more than we've done. I don't know why I even kissed you. You're such a prat!" Vic stormed away from Teddy. Her hair flew behind her in an angry curtain.
Teddy watched her retreating form. Every time he spoke to her lately, he ended up feeling more confused than he had been before. But, he noticed, even though it hurt to see her storm away, he sure did like watching her walk away. Perhaps that was what Harry had meant about feelings you did not even know you had.