Set right after the sports festival. Kachhan's bullying didn't stop after Izuku's acceptance into UA it only got worse. Izuku tries to be strong for All Might, however Izuku's mind is racing faster and faster that one day he stands on the rooftop of UA. Themes of bullying, violence, and suicide.

Follows Watashi no R (My R) BNHA PV - by Lycoperdon on youtube. And Just like in this video, I did change some of the translated lyrics to fit the story. Ex girl to boy, braids to curly.

This in my first BNHA fic so please don't judge too harsh, would love some helpful criticism. This is a oneshot that might turn into a full story I'm undecided if I want to continue further. Just let me know what you think and tell me if you want my to continue.

~~My Reality ~~

When I was just about to take off my shoes on the rooftop,

I found someone already there before me—a boy with curly hair.

Despite myself, I called out to her: "Hey, don't do it please."

The words just kind of slipped from my mouth.

"Woah!"

"Kacchan that's SOOO awesome!"

"I wish I had a quirk like that!" I hear all of my friends scream in excitement.

"What an amazing Quirk!"

"It's a flashy Quirk just right for a hero. Right, Katsuki?" My preschool teacher asked.

I gazed in wonder to my best friend Katsuki Bakugo, aka Kacchan. "Kacchan, that's awesome! I wish I had a Quirk like that!" Kacchan looked at me and smiled and said. "I'm amazing Izuku!"

It didn't really matter to me either way.

It just didn't sit right with me that someone got there ahead of me.

"Did you know that Izuku's name can be read as Deku?" exclaimed Kacchan.

"Woah Kacchan you can read?" One of his friends said.

"Of course I can read, I'm awesome!" Kacchan said with a toothy grin. "Deku means the one who can do nothing! It fits him! He has no Quirk, he's Quirkless!" He screamed.

"Deku!"

"Deku!"

"Quirkless!"

The boy with curly hair told me his story—

the kind of story one probably has heard before.

"I thought we were meant for each other.

I just really wanted him to like me back."

"That's mean, Kacchan! Don't you see that's he's crying? If you keep going, I-I-I'll never forgive you!" my voice trembled as I scream at who I thought was my best friend.

"Even though you're Quirkless… you're pretending to be a hero, Deku?" Kacchan states as he starts to beat me up. Punch, kick, punch, punch, kick. Ever since my fourth birthday and my Quirk hadn't develop, Kacchan had been bullying on me it wasn't fair!

Are you kidding me?! The nerve you have

to get here before me for such a lame reason!

"Since you're all third years, it's about time for you to think seriously about your future. I'll pass out handouts for your future plans now, but you're all pretty much planning to go into the hero course, right?" My teacher stated, my classmates start around me as I am sinking into my chair further keeping my eyes glued to my paper.

"Teacher, Don't lump us all in the same group! I'm not gonna be stuck at the bottom with the rest of these rejects!"

"Oh, if I remember correctly, you want to go to UA High right, Bakugo?"

"UA High? That National School?"

"Its was in the top 0.2% this year , you know!"

"Their acceptance rates always really low, too!"

Oh no, I scream in my head, I cover my hands in my face and try to melt into my desk even further..

"I aced the mock exam, I'm the only one at this school who could possibly get into UA. I'll definitely surpass All Might and become the top hero! My name'll be inscribed on the list of top earners!" Kacchan ranted.

"Oh yeah, Midoriya wanted to go to UA, too right?" my teacher stated as I looked at him in horror. Why, I thought, why did you say that and why did you say that when Kacchan was talking?! There was a moment of silence in the classroom before my whole class bursts out in laughter. I look around and my classmates and the room is spinning, afraid of getting sick I look down at my desk again and shut my eye. All I hear is their laughter echoing inside of my head, their belittling stares and sadistic smiles. I can feel Kacchan's anger directed at me.

"HEY DEKU! You're below the rejects! You're Quirkless! How can you even stand in the same ring as me?!" Kacchan screams at me. I search the classroom for the teacher, but when I find him, he's smiling. He's not going to do anything… again. I hate this I hate how powerless I am and how everyone thinks its okay to bully me because I don't have a Quirk. "What the hell can you do? You're Quirkless!" The bell rings, and thankfully Kacchan stops for now.

You're upset because you can't have what you want?

You're lucky enough that you've never had anything stolen from you!

Everyone is leaving the classroom as I start to back up. I have to get out of here before Kacchan gets back. Just as I was putting my notebook in my backpack, it was ripped out of my hand, by none other than Kacchan.

"We're not done talking yet, Deku."

"Hey Katsuki what you got there?" One of Kacchan friends ask. Kacchan waves my notebook around. "Hero Analysis for the Future? Seriously that's ridiculous!" He laughs.

"It's fine just give it back!" I plea. The life drains from my face when I see Kacchan use his fire Quirk on my notebook, literally punching my notebook to ashes. Kacchan sees my eyes widen and smirks and throws my notebook book out the window to the ground two floors lower.

"Most top first-string heroes have stories about them from their school days. I want the shine of being to be called the only student to make it into UA from this mediocre city junior high school. I mean, I'm a perfectionist." Kacchan grabs my right shoulder and started to burn my jacket with his quirk. "So anyways, don't apply to UA, nerd." I stare at Kacchan with fear in every fiber of my being. I am rooted to the floor as I hear Kacchan and his friends leaving. "If you wanna be a hero that badly, there's a quick way to do it. Believe that you'll be born with a Quirk in your next life and take a last chance dive off the roof!" I spin around in horror at Kacchan did he really just say that? I watch as he and his friends walk away laughing.

"I feel better now that I've talked about it,"

the boy with curly hair said, and disappeared.

"Idiot! If I really jumped, that would mean you instigated a suicide! Think before you speak!" I said quietly as I stare at my burnt notebook being nibbled on by the koi fish which tank it landed in. "That's not fish food, stupid…. That's my notebook." I hugged my notebook closely to my chest as I slide down the wall crying my heart out.

"All right, I'm gonna do it today," I thought,

but just when I was about to take off my shoes,

I found a short boy there,

and I ended up calling out to him again.

The short boy told me, about how lonely he feels in his class.

"Everyone ignores me. Everything's stolen from me.

'I don't belong anywhere," he said.

"I'm home." I whispered.

"Izuku!? I was just about to call I was starting to get worried. Nothing happened did it?" My mother said.

"Ah no, I just took the long way home that's all mom."

"Oh thank goodness, well hurry up Izuku. I made your favorite Katsudon!" My mom said with a cheerful grin.

Are you kidding me?! The nerve you have

to get here before me for such a tame reason!

Despite all that, you're still loved at home,

and there's always dinner waiting for you, right?

"I'm hungry," the short girl cried, and disappeared.

'Dear Past Izuku,
So many things has happened since the sludge monster attack. I got a Quirk do you believe it! I met our hero, All Might, and long story short he is the reason we have a Quirk right now. It will get better so stay strong.' I write on a piece of paper, it was an assignment for Present Mic to write a letter to your past self and tell them what to expect in their future life as a hero. I scoffed at the last sentence I wrote. I crumple the letter and throw it in the bin. "I can't lie to myself or my past self, It doesn't get better, it only gets worse." I whispered as I lie my head on my desk. I study my wrist, Kacchan grabbed me there during class this morning and I have a hand shaped burn. It hurt, but it felt good. I eyed at the box cutter I had in my pencil holder on my desk. I grabbed it without thinking, and pressed it against my wrist and drew the blade up against my flesh. The pain was exhilarating, the pressure was lifted off of my shoulder that I didn't know I had. The ecstasy feeling didn't last as long as I hoped and was filled with guilt…. What had I just done? I quickly grab banganges I had received from recovery girl and wrap my wrist tightly. I stare at the blade that I had just cut myself with, I stare and stare and my mind is racing.

"Izuku? Sweetie? It's late why don't you work on that tomorrow?" My mother's voice echoes in my once silent room.

"Yea mom, I'll finish this sentence and I'll head to bed."

"Alright, I love you, have a good night."

"I-I love you too mom." I say as I fight back the tears that are already falling.

Just like that, I spoke to a few of them

and talked them out of it,

while I myself can't share my pains with anyone.

I cut, cut, and CUT! The number of scars that are self inflicted now outweigh the number I had received at the entrance exam and at the sport festival. Cutting deeper and longer than I have ever done before….NO I scream in my head. That feeling isn't here anymore, that few moments of bliss, where did they go? I want that back please. God please give me that bliss back, if you can hear my plea now, please just give it back!

For the first time, I've found

a boy who has the same kind of problems as me.

I met this boy wearing a yellow cardigan

after I've seen a few of them.

Iida and Uraraka had asked if I wanted to eat lunch with them today, I declined saying I was going to the roof to get some fresh air after Eraserhead's lesson, they nodded in agreement.

"We will see you in PE then Midoriya." Iida said.

"See you later Deku!" Uraraka beamed.

"Okay. Goodbye Iida. Goodbye Uraraka." I said with bravado, trying not to let them know what I'm about to do. I turn to the exit and start to walk up the stairs. I pull my sleeve down, so that the fresh bandages from this morning aren't seen by students that walk by.

"I came here, hoping to erase

the bruises that keep increasing

every time I come home," he said.

With each step I remember, trying to find hope in all of this. However, as I hear the echo of my footsteps in the empty stairwell, three more realities, three more truths, three more fears come to mind.

The words just kind of slipped from my mouth.

It didn't really matter to me either way.

But I ended up saying to him

something even I myself didn't quite believe in:

"Hey, don't do it please."

I'm face to face with the door to the rooftop, my hand shakes as it reaches for the door. I searched and I searched but the fears outweigh the hopes. The cold metal of the door handle penatrances my being. A set of eyes flash in my mind, one grey and one turquoise. I smile that is the only hope that could break this fear.

Aah, what should I do?

I can't stop this boy.

I don't have the right to stop him.

But even so, just go away from here.

It's too painful for me to look at you.

I walk towards the fence at the edge of the building, "I have one regret," I say aloud "I never got to tell him my feelings, I never got to say goodbye."

"I won't do it today, then,"

he said as he dropped his gaze, and disappeared.

I study the fence, simple chain link fence, pretty easy to climb over. I start to climb. "Shoto Todoroki, I like you, I think I love you, I don't know how or when but I fell in love with you. I know we don't know each other well. But I can't help it."

There's no one here today.

It's just me, myself and I.

No one can get in my way.

No one would get in my way for me.

My toes hanging off of the ledge. I grab my envelope out of my jacket and rip some of my hair out and stuff it inside. My green hair nestled with a note, I seal it with a quick wipe of my tongue. Placing it in my breast pocket, making sure the lettering is visible.

Taking off my cardigan,

"All Might. I am so sorry!" I sobbed, "Hopefully you will find someone more worthy of carrying One for All"

uncurlying my hair,

"Mom I am so sorry! You didn't do anything wrong, you were the best mom I could've asked for." I beamed.

this short boy

"Iida.. Uraraka, I'm sorry your were great friends!"

is going to jump now

"And Shoto Todoroki" I screamed "I love you, and I am so sorry I didn't get to say goodbye." tears rolling down my face I don't bother to wipe them off. "I am so sorry." I jumped.

and be free.

"Midoriya!"