**AN: Guess whose back? Back again! Bonesboy's back! Tell your friends! Guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back-na-na-na-nuh, na-nuh, na-nuh, na-nuh, na-nuh, na-na-na-nuh, na-nuh, na-nuh, na-nuh...**

**Disclaimer: Ohh...I don't...own Na-ru-to...it makes...me sad-ya know? Just please...don't sue me! All I've got is some shit from the six-ties!**

**WARNING: LEMON GOODNESS**

**Chapter 18: Fun, Fretting, and Fucking with Hidan**

* * *

**"You there, Naru-chan?"** Nibi purred in the teen's mind, making the blonde gape as he stared at his reflection in the mirror. His mouth moved, and yet no sound came out. The feline biju giggled, finding the sight quite cute. Eventually, all entertaining things must come to an end.

_N-Nibi? NIBI! What the fuck! What are you doing in my mind?_ Naruto asked the biju. Recalling a lesson that his biju had taught him long ago, he held his hands up and quickly thought, _No, wait! I don't want to know! I don't wanna KNOW!_

**"Aww, what's wrong, Naru-chan? Don't you want to know how I got in your head?"** Nibi purred as she made herself comfortable in his head and slowly slipped her own memories of a uniting with Kyuubi into his mind. She giggled at the look on the blonde's reaction in the mirror. The blonde's mouth was slack jawed and his left eye twitched uncontrollably. Eventually, a quiet squeak came from his mouth before he started imitating a fish once again, further entertaining the demonic cat.

"Nng...Naru-koi?" Naruto thanked kami for the sudden distraction from his newfound mate-(he blushed before shaking his head and correcting the thought)-err, girlfriend's biju and turned to face her. Yugito was sitting up in the bed, her long hair undone from its usual braid and making her seem much more attractive, holding the sheet to her chest with one hand as she rubbed her eye with the other. Before he could greet her and grant her a good morning, the Kumo-Ame kunoichi suddenly went rigid and her eyes widened.

"W-Why is Kyuubi in my head?" Yugito asked, her eyes locking on Naruto's blue orbs, "Is Nibi playing a trick? Naruto-koi?"

Naruto pinched the bridge of his nose when a purr echoed in his mind, **"Aww! I knew Kitten loved me! Look how much she misses her Nibi-chan!"**

"Apparently not, Yugi-chan," the blonde Ame muttered as he rubbed his head, "Somehow...our Biju swapped containers... How that will affect us, I have no- Do you smell that?"

Yugito blinked when Naruto suddenly sniffed the air and his eyes flashed golden-green when he looked back at her. A gleam reflected in his eye, one that made her blush heavily. Normally, due to her containing the highest aroused biju, she'd wake up a little hotter than norm. Apparently, even with the Kitsune Lord within her, she still did. In a blur, he reappeared in front of her, making the older girl jump back, before he pressed his lips against hers. Barely fighting off the pleasure-induced shudder that went down her back at the intimate motion, Yugito pushed her boyfriend back enough to look in his eyes.

"N-Naru-koi!" Yugito gasped when he went for a new target, her throat. His lips and teeth kissed and lightly nipped on the sensitive skin. The blonde chunin girl fought back the urge to moan and tried, with little effort mind you, to push her lover away, "N-Naruto...W-We've gotta...Gotta...Ohh...mm...No! Naruto, we-we have to f-find a w-way to switch the, ooh that was nice...switch the _biju_!"

Her last word was turned into a squeal as Naruto's hands began fondling her C-cupped breasts. His nimble fingers lightly applying pressure to her two pillows, making her mind dive into a swirl. A deep chuckle came from the back of her mind, making her focus on her new tenant to get answers.

_W-What's going on!_ She asked the Kyuubi. Said beast chuckled once again before he gave the highly aroused jinchuriki an answer.

**"I'm going back to the Kit, and Nibi-chan is coming back in here...Thank Kami..."** the last two words were lost to Yugito because Naruto decided to latch onto her areola and lightly nibble/suck on it. As Yugito moaned, her kunoichi trained mind multitasked and demanded a more in depth answer. Kyuubi smirked and crossed one paw over the other, **"While you and the Kit did the bed sheet tango, Nibi and I managed to be intimate with one another...after nearly seventy years, mind you. Unfortunately, before the Kit woke up, we were both...well, let's put it this way; Nibi acted as if her father walked in on us and shoved me out the window."**

_I should've known this was Nibi's fault!_ Yugito mentally growled as she outwardly moaned when Naruto slid two fingers inside of her, _Sweet Kami! How does he know this stuff?_

**"Blame the pervert. Kit does it all the time,"** Kyuubi muttered with a shrug before growling in annoyance to a new presence within Yugito's mind, **"Did you get lost? What the hell took ya so damn long?"**

**"Ah, shut up, Kyu-kun,"** Nibi muttered with a pout in her voice, **"It's not my fault that your seal is harder to get through! You and your tails..."**

**"Oi! I worked hard for these tails, and you weren't complaining last night..."**

_Okay! Gross! Get out of my head, Kyuubi!_ Yugito mentally shouted. The Kyuubi mumbled under his breath before he slowly began to fade away. Yugito was thankful for the lack of a backlash before her attentive lover's actions went to the forefront of her mind. After a good fifteen minutes of foreplay, either Naruto was sick of jerking her off, or she had drenched his hand more than he would have liked. Her instincts had been driving her for the last fifteen minutes, while her consciousness got answers from their biju, and she discovered that she had come nearly five times, while Naruto had yet to cum at all.

Yugito's eyes went to the mass of sun-kissed hair between her legs as she arched her back, her chin touching her chest in an effort to watch Naruto lap at her second pair of lips. Her left hand was pushing his face further into her pussy while her right hand was busy teasing her breasts. Rather reluctantly, Yugito pulled Naruto's head away from his snack, making the whisker cheeked boy look up at her before he licked his lips and smiled slightly.

"Main course! Now!" Yugito panted out, no longer wanting to keep from uniting with him once again. Naruto quickly obliged by climbing over her and resting the tip of his enlarged member at her quivering lips. Wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his hips, Yugito nodded up at her lover.

"Oh, Kami," Naruto moaned out as he slowly slid into his fellow jinchuriki. Her eager nether regions quickly tightened around his member, as though she wanted to keep him within the tight tunnel his little friend had explored the night before. Yugito's eyes were glazed over and she released a loud moan as Naruto's length slid within her, the width stretching her to orgasmic proportions. She idly wondered if he was merely doing this because of her biju's effect on his psyche.

Naruto stopped once he felt himself fully swallowed by Yugito's pussy. Pausing a moment, taking a heavy amount of satisfaction from the dazed smile on his lover's face, Naruto bent down and captured Yugito's lips with his own. Breaking the kiss, Naruto moved his mouth next to her left ear. In a heated whisper, Naruto quietly spoke, "I love you, Yugito-chan...Now, move with me."

Slowly, he began pulling out, earning a whimper of pleasure from Yugito, before he thrusted back in. Yugito gasped sharply, her fingernails digging into the base of his neck as he slowly fell into faster and harder thrusts. As the heat in her stomach grew once again, her Hentai-loving biju whispered a suggestion into her mind.

**"Take control, Kitten. Ride your tom."**

The thought was too tempting to her, and a grin came over her face as she suddenly flipped Naruto onto his back, earning a yelp of shock from the spikey haired blonde. Pushing down on her 'mate's shoulders with her hands, Yugito smirked down at the shocked blonde, her hips pressing down on his own and keeping him from thrusting up into her. With the amount of confusion and lust reflecting in the fourteen year old boy's eyes, Yugito wondered how she looked to him.

As if he read her thoughts, Naruto replied with a dazed voice as he smiled up at her, "I've got a goddess in my bed...Am I lucky or what?"

Yugito blushed and smiled back, leaning down and whispering lustfully into his ear, "You're lucky, don't let it go to your head."

"Too late," was his cheeky reply as he stole a kiss. Yugito broke the kiss, giving a slightly lust-filled smirk as he tried in vain to thrust up into her. Naruto furrowed his brows and tried to move once again before he felt a prick in his right shoulder. Yugito's left hand held a small senbon needle and it was nearly halfway imbedded into his shoulder. Getting a kiss on the lips, this one quick and teasing, Naruto looked up with confusion at his lover.

"You need to learn patience," Yugito teased with a smile as her hands began their explorations of his still developing muscles, "And Yugi-sama is going to teach you it."

"Yugi-sama?" He repeated with a small smile, getting a pinch in the side at his amusement.

"Don't patronize me," Yugito scolded, "I'm going to try something I've heard other girls talk about. Just enjoy the ride, Kitsune-kun..."

"Might as well," Naruto grinned out as Yugito pushed herself up into a vertical position. Doing so made his member drive further within her and the two teens felt a moan leave their mouths. Naruto, his limp and unmoving body, scowled when he realized Yugito was probably doing this as some form of payback...even if she wasn't fully aware of it herself.

Yugito was seriously just trying to comprehend the feeling of being full as Naruto's throbbing organ buried itself near the walls of her womb. Her head was rolled back and her eyes were wide. In the back of her mind, somewhere deep where morals were non-existing, she thought, _Favorite position: CHECK!_

"Oh...It's...It's _so_ big, Naruto..." her face heated at her statement, but she didn't really care at that point. Naruto, for his part, had to do his best not to bust a nut then and there. Never had he seen such a hotter scene in his teenage life!

First off, a girl with well-rounded curves and full, perky breasts that were his and his alone was impaling herself with his endowment. The second point of it being the hottest thing possible being her head was rolled back and her breasts seemed to round even more as she arched her back in pleasure. The last point would be the fact Yugito was speaking in a tone that he had only heard when he was forced to watch an adult picture with his Ero-jiji. He thought that movie was erotic, and it was at the highest point for a good portion of his life, but seeing it happen before his own eyes, being commented by his _first girlfriend_, no less...Well, the young jinchuriki was positive he would never see another scene that was so erotic.

He was unaware how wrong he would be until a much later date.

But, back in the present, Yugito was coming down from her near-orgasm state and sultry smirked down at him. Rocking her hips slowly, they both moaned in synchronization as waves of pleasure washed over their bodies. Never before had Naruto wanted his biju to heal him faster than necessarily needed until now. Yugito's rocking was driving him insane and he wanted nothing more than to get them to their release.

***Elsewhere, a white haired man travelling with his first three students suddenly smiled and fought down the urge to cry in joy. He had successfully corrupted another soul.***

"Oh, Naru...Naru-koi...it's so good..." Yugito moaned out. It took every bit of willpower to _not_ end his paralysis then and there for the Nekomata jinchuriki. Experimentally, as she rocked back, she slowly pushed up, sliding him out of her, before rocking forward and slamming down. Her eyes glossed over and she stilled as the massive amount of pleasure nearly caused her to cum then and there.

"N-Neko-chan...I...I need..."

As if reading his mind, Yugito reached down and removed the senbon needle. Eagerly, Naruto sat up, his member slowly sliding out of Yugito slightly as he did so, and he wrapped his arms around her back. Yugito moaned and wrapped her legs and arms around him, pulling his frame against her own, her breasts pressing against his chest.

"Oh fuck, Yugi-chan..." Naruto groaned as he started to thrust his hips in their seated position, "You...You feel so good...It...I can't..."

"YES! OH KAMI!" Yugito cried out, absentmindedly thanking said deity that she had placed silencing seals around the room, "CUM IN ME, NARU-KOI...FILL ME WITH YOUR SEED!"

The thrusting continued before Naruto suddenly slammed his hips against her own. Like their first time, his teeth broke the skin near her neck as he bit into her trap, as hers bit into his shoulder. After the traditional marking they seemed to both enjoy, the two blondes flung their heads back as they came together.

In more ways than one.

"YUGITO-CHAN!"

"NARUTO-KOI!"

Naruto's lower body tensed a few more times as Yugito went completely stiff in his hold. They remained like that, their heads falling forward (but not smacking against each other's), before Naruto pressed his forehead against Yugito's.

"I love you, Yugi-chan," Naruto whispered, as though he were scared to admit it. (*Cough-cough* foreshadowing *cough-cough*)

Yugito panted before slipping her head further beneath Naruto's and nuzzling into the space under his chin, "And I you, Naru-koi...Did we have something to do, today?"

Naruto paused at that and racked his brain before looking down at Yugito, "I...don't think so. Why?"

His answer was to be shoved onto his back, Yugito's smirk electing a similar one of his own, before he got a reply.

"Cuz I want more."

* * *

Gaara sighed as he sat across from the Yuki daimyo. The expecting woman, and future wife of his friend, was fidgeting nervously with her teacup. One may wonder why if they weren't privy to the knowledge that he was. The Sunagakure jinchuriki looked back at the message sent via messenger toad and closed his eyes.

_Dear Koyuki-hime,_

_To say I am excited for the wedding of my fourteen year old son would be an understatement. However, the love of my life and my son's very overprotective mother is having mixed feelings on the subject. I had this message sent just after Ko-chan beat the s-um, life out of myself and Naruto's sensei. Hopefully, she will not kill either of us (nor you, not that she would!) and will take the news of becoming a grandmother well. We plan to set out to journey, by foot (so I can try and placate my wife's anger), in a week's time. Hopefully, this message is received in a decent amount of time._

_With much love, Your future-father-in-law_

_Ame Yahiko_

The message was just received today, nearly six days after it had been sent, and Koyuki was absolutely terrified. Having never met Naruto's mother, only knowing how defensive of her he was, Gaara couldn't begin to try and placate the distressed Koyuki over the situation. Hence the relaxing herbal tea they were sharing. The redheaded jinchuriki shook his head, praying his friend wouldn't 'knock-up' Nii Yugito (he was aware of their actions because of Shukaku's begrudging enhancements to his senses, allowing him to faintly get a gist of their morning actions as he walked past their shared room), before looking at the daimyo with a small smile.

"As the Nara clan says," Gaara began before taking a sip of tea, "This will be troublesome...How is your tea?"

* * *

**-A few hours outside Nami no Kuni-**

As the defenders of Ame's allies and the living brochures of the village, the Akatsuki are bound to rush to the aid of any nation, be them friend or paying foe. However, when given an order by their Kage's son, who is just as powerful (if not more in some cases) in the commanding sense, the many teams of two can take as long as they wish.

Hence the situation we come across now. Two people are walking down the road, both wearing black cloaks with red clouds decorating them. One had his cloak open and a visible slashed Ame hetai-ite was around his neck, as well as a small necklace symbolizing his religion, and the other had a white hood up and over his head, revealing a dark tanned skin tone and two eyes, his mouth and nose covered by a mask and his hetai-ite around his forehead attached to his hood. The first one looked highly irritated and his fists were clenched at his sides, one wrapping tightly around a large scythe, and the other had an amused twinkle in his eye.

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No!"

"Are we there yet?"

"GODDAMN IT, NO! JASHIN-SAMA HELP ME, IF YOU ASK THAT ONE MORE TIME, KAKAZU!"

"...So you're saying, we're _not_ there yet?"

"GAAAAHHGHGH!" Hidan bit down on the top blade of his tri-bladed scythe in an effort to not cuss the fuck out of his longtime partner. Kakazu smirked under his mask, his golden eyes crinkling in amusement. Ever since he had met the Amekage's son, he had taken to the art of being annoying, much to his immortal, foul-mouthed teammate's ire. Kakazu knew that Konan wanted Hidan to cut down on the cussing so that he wouldn't give Ame a bad rep, and doing what he could to try and get the silver haired man to go against his word.

"You know, biting on your scythe is not good for your teeth," Kakazu commented, his grin growing as Hidan suddenly stopped walking. He knew Hidan was contemplating killing him, but he also knew Hidan didn't want to invoke the wrath of their Kage or their Kage's son. Luckily for the old Takigakure-shinobi, Naruto had grown attached to the greedy bounty hunter, and if he were completely honest, Kakazu had grown attached to his Kage's son as well.

It didn't help Hidan's inner battle that his own nephew adored Kakazu, too. A Jashinist he may be, but Hidan wouldn't be able to live with himself if little Ryu hated him. Like all the other Akatsuki, Hidan was bound to Ame because of his loyalty and his family.

The thought of family made Kakazu suddenly stop walking as he began thinking of his home, his birthplace, actually. Takigakure, the Waterfall village. Last time he was there, the Nanabi was sealed into his great-granddaughter. He felt guilty that he hadn't visited her in the seventeen years she had been alive, and then a smile came to his face, not a smirk of entertainment, but one of realization.

_Yahiko-sama said Naruto would need more than three wives to bring the Uzumaki clan back to life,_ the bounty hunter mused as he absently noticed his teammate walking up to him, _Perhaps...Perhaps I should offer my family line to the gaki. Besides, the Shodai Amekage wants an alliance with all the nations...Oh, not only am I a greedy bastard, I'm a smart greedy bastard!_

"Hidan," he suddenly spoke to his slightly calmed teammate, "We need to go to Takigakure."

"WHAT?" Hidan shouted with wide eyes, "We've been traveling for a month to NAMI! Taki is nearly a week away!"

"It's for Naruto."

Hidan paused and scowled, "You damn bastard..."

"What? I like the kid and so do you," Kakazu said with a shrug, turning around and walking towards his home, "Besides...What I need to grab will undoubtedly cause the village to attack me. You want a few free sacrifices or what?"

"...What the fuck are we waiting for?" Hidan cried with glee as his eyes gleamed in excitement, "LET'S GO TO TAKI!"

_Works every time, _Kakazu thought with a smirk as Hidan sped ahead of him. The old shinobi chuckled and shook his head before racing after his blood lusting partner. He was reluctant to go home, but he was rather excited to see his great-granddaughter.

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**AN: Hehehe...Gaara...I love writing a funny Gaara. Sorry I took so long! I'm so unbelievably sorry! BELIEVE IT...Dattebayo. As for Kakazu and Hidan...meh, I like them. And I could totally see Konan, my Konan anyway, trying to keep Hidan from wrecking Amegakure's appearance by getting him to promise to cut down on his mouth. Makes me wish I saved Tayuya...or didn't I? HEHEHE, guess you'll have to wait to see! REVIEW FUCKAS!**