Chapter 1: Summer End Time

My life so far has been a series of strange, bizarre events that seem almost like they're parodying the idea of a normal life. I want to play a new video game? How about playing that game for two years because I'm trapped inside. Help out a friend with work? Nope, actually I'm facing down a serial killer. Go to school?

Try to kill my teacher.

That last one might take some explaining if I had to talk to a therapist - pfft, right - but on the other hand the existence of the STL Machine is still incredibly secret. I'd probably be hauled off to jail before I so much as mentioned RATH.

Still, I was stuck inside the STL Machine for the foreseeable future; I needed, I'm assuming here, to recover from being injected with a murder drug by the aforementioned serial killer's partner in crime, Johnny Black. Fuck that guy, by the way, I hope he's dead. Asshole thinks he can hurt my brother and get away with it?

In the STL Machine, I've been de-aged back to 13, stuck in a class called 3-E - the E stands for End, apparently - and told to kill the yellow octopus bio-engineered super creature that's teaching the class.

And the worst part of all this is, I think I'm starting to get used to the ridiculousness that is my teacher.

"A test of courage?" Nagisa asked, staring at Korosensei. "On our last day here?"

...Huh. How about that. I can still be surprised by stuff.

Neat.

Our assassination vacation had been oh-so-rudely interrupted by some idiot with a grudge over something we may or may not have done to him in the past, and so we lost a lot of time. It was almost over. Almost, but not quite; Korosensei decided we had one last activity to participate in before we left the next morning.

Wait fuck leaving means going on the boat again fuck fuck fuck, Takaoka, Takaoka come back and save me...

"Of course!" Korosensei said, stretching his tentacles while dressed up in a stereotypical ghost, complete with white robes. "What better activity for a fine midsummer's night?"

"Might I suggest reading? Or," I said slowly, "...anything else other than this?"

Okano poked my side and I twitched, frowning at her. "Don't be a buzzkill, Nick," she said. "What do you have against tests of courage anyway?"

"Normally nothing," I said. "But this is Korosensei we're talking about. When has he ever done something without having an ulterior motive?"

"Yeah, nice try," Karma said lazily to the octopus. "You just wanna have fun at our expense."

"See, Karma agrees with me."

Okano shook her head. "Is that a good thing, or...?"

I shrugged. "I'll get back to you on that whenever I figure it out myself."

"Unlike some, who shall remain nameless," Korosensei said, "I've been too cooped up in a shell to have any fun at all! We're on a tropical island for crying out loud!"

Maehara clenched a fist. "I think a test of courage sounds like a blast," he said with an easy grin.

"No kidding!" Isogai said.

"Aww..." Kurahashi sighed. "But I don't like being scared."

Sugino waved away her worries. "Don't worry," he said. "Korosensei'll be playing the ghosts, right?"

"Oh yeah!"

"So it won't be scary," Sugino said.

Somehow, Korosensei's sly grin and low chuckling seemed slightly sketchy to me. Of course, that could just be my paranoia speaking, but on the other hand, I've made it this far by not trusting anyone other than my family, why stop now?

Following Korosensei's lead, everyone in E Class trooped down to the beach and followed him to the entrance of a cave. "This beach cavern is the ideal spot," he said. "I want everyone to walk through in boy-girl pairs."

Alright yeah okay my bullshit senses are tingling. "'Scuse me sir," I drawled. "We've got an odd number of people. Mind if I go with Ritsu and pretend that works?"

"An excellent suggestion, Nick," Korosensei nodded. "Now! First group, go ahead." Kayano and Nagisa looked at each other, then shrugged and headed into the murky cave.

...Heh, I could totally make a joke about the pairs supposed to be boy-girl, not girl-girl, but Nagisa seems a little sensitive to stuff like that so I won't. See the magic of learning boundaries in action, I guess.

When it was finally my turn to go through, I flicked on the flashlight and sauntered through the cave. This was probably a chance to try to kill Korosensei, but let's be real; we'd failed when we had every conceivable advantage, so what was the point in doing it right now? Might as well regroup, lick our wounds, and come up with a better plan later.

"Y'know, I've never wondered this before, but do AI get scared of stuff?" I asked Ritsu as I followed the path. Din and Yui never really bring it up, but... what would they be scared of? "Like, segfaults, or crappy OS updates, or stuff like that?"

Ritsu giggled. "No, not exactly," she said. "But I was worried earlier, back on the roof," she added, her voice getting a little softer and kinder. "You were acting kinda scary."

Ugh. Way to make me feel like a tool, Ritsu. I definitely owe her an apology.

In fact, I was about to give her one when a convenient distraction reared its ugly head as blue flames flickered into existence, illuminating some the gloom my flashlight only barely pushed back. The sound of plucking strings echoed through the cave as a ghost-like figure glided into view.

Except the ghost figure was Korosensei, and so I didn't really give a damn. Stuff like this wasn't very scary, and jump scares weren't any better; the scary part was when I was walking between ghost sightings, alone in the dark. I didn't like the dark. I didn't like anything that kept me from seeing things coming.

And this time, I didn't have Kana here to hold my hand. Gods damn it. I miss her. I really, really miss her.

"Beware," Spooky Korosensei intoned. "You have entered a cave drenched in blood and tragedy. For here, routed in battle, members of the Ryuku royalty met an untimely and most violent end..." The flames died out and I twitched, taking deep breaths to keep myself calm.

I wonder if that's true, though, the whole royalty death thing. Kinda macabre if it's true.

"You would be wise to remain on guard," Korosensei suddenly said, appearing behind me. I gritted my teeth, not looking. "For if you travel alone, you will be haunted by restless spirits..."

Uh huh. Yeah. That's not suspicious in the slightest as to your true motives, Korosensei.

His presence disappeared, leaving the way forward clear. As I kept walking through the tunnel, I could hear him start up the spiel again for the pair following me, which, uh... it made it feel a little bit more real, I guess.

"Nick?" Ritsu asked as I wandered through the tunnels, flashlight playing over the floor, walls, and ceiling as I constantly moved it around. "Are you alright? Your heart rate has increased substantially."

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, swallowing. "It's just... Darkness freaks me out. I can't see anything coming for me, and I have to rely on other senses, and without -" I cut myself off. Talking about Future Step? You idiot, how are you this rattled? "Without my eyes I can't predict what's coming next."

I shook my head. "Sorry, I'm rambling. Just... keep talking with me, Ritsu? It helps if I can distract myself."

"Alright," she said. "Did you know that my core processing unit has enough memory to hold..."

While she rattled off weird esoteric facts about her hardware that would probably make Kazuto either blush or jealous depending on how he interpreted the conversation, I was able to focus on that instead of the possibility that there was something behind me trying to attack or that the shadow from my flashlight was an enemy.

Gods, I'm fucked up. Sometimes I forget how much Aincrad wrecked my psyche.

"Ah, Ritsu," I said while she was talking about hardware ports, "don't mean to interrupt, but we've reached, uh... something."

Skulls and more blue fire dangled from the ceiling. "We starved to death in these caves," the jaws clattered. "But before our death, we stooped to the depths of consuming a single bone. Now, you must do the same!"

Something dropped in front of me.

I stared at the pocky stick. "We will not be satisfied until the bone is consumed from both ends!" the skulls rattled.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," I sighed. Reaching up, I snapped the pocky stick in half and then shoved both halves in my mouth, munching away irritably.

Dead silence filled the cave for a few seconds.

"Oooooh," the skulls moaned. "You may proceed..."

Yeah. This wasn't fooling anyone.

I had a feeling when he mentioned it, but the whole boy-girl pair thing gave me a pretty good idea as to what Korosensei had in mind. He wanted people to pair off romantically in the class, for no real reason other than general nosiness that I could see. If he'd had some other reason, he'd probably have argued when I asked to go with Ritsu - but since I have a girlfriend and Ritsu is an AI, he probably figured it was okay for the two of us to wander through this together.

It didn't hurt my theory that the next spooky event I stumbled upon was a supposedly-dead corpse behind a screen door, asking to see people kiss.

Yeah.

"Hey, Ritsu?" I asked as I walked through the cave. "You there?"

"Uh huh! What is it, Nick?" Ritsu replied.

I kicked at a pebble on the stone floor. "I, uh... Thanks, Ritsu, for what you said. You saw I was in trouble, and you helped out." I sighed. "I... have issues," I said to her. "It's related to stuff I've gone through in the past."

"Are you talking about your scar?" Ritsu asked.

I chuckled. "That's related, yeah," I shrugged. "I dunno. It's just... Normally, I'm able to deal, but seeing Takaoka up there and then having him destroy our only chance at saving our classmates, even if it wasn't really the only chance..." I shook my head, trying to put my thoughts in order and stop them from just spilling out like this.

"I miss my family."

"Your family?" Ritsu asked. "Your… friends? I think you call them your sisters?"

"Yeah," I said. "Shino, Asuna, Rika, Keiko... All of them. My brother, too. And especially Kana. None of them are here, and I can't see them for a while."

I'd managed to get along just fine for the first few months of my isolation, but that was clearly by subconsciously not thinking about it. Takaoka had fucked that up, though. With the rage breaking through, I was off-balance and my emotions were running hot, and Kana was in the forefront of my mind, now.

I let out another sigh. "I just want to see my family," I muttered. "I miss having someone nearby."

"Well," Ritsu said, "if you ever want to talk, you can talk to me! I don't mind!"

I grinned weakly. "Thanks, Ritsu, but... it's not the same, y'know? You're a good friend, but... you're not..." I shook my head. I didn't want to be a jerk.

"I understand," she said, and I checked my phone. She was smiling, so at least she didn't take offense. "My offer still stands, though. I may not be a mental health care AI -" I twitched and she clearly caught it, but ignored it, "- but you can always talk to me, Nick. That's what friends are for, right?"

"Sure," I said.

"…By the way," Ritsu said hesitantly, "what's the significance of that name?"

"Huh? What name?"

Ritsu blinked. "Rythin. What you wanted me to call you if you were losing control."

I licked my lips. "It's… Hhh, it's the name of the avatar I've been using for a while. I met all of my family while using it as a name. But they're the only ones who know about it, so hearing you say it then would have surprised me enough that I could think clearly. Nothing more, nothing less." I wasn't going to tell her that this world was a fake reality, of course. So, changing the subject. "Now, I think Terasaka's group should be entering soon, right?"

"They just entered," Ritsu said. "What does -"

A horrible shriek of terror filled the cave, echoing from wherever Korosensei came from. "That," I said with a shrug. "Korosensei's the biggest coward in 3-E, remember? Of course he's going to be scared of ghosts." And Hazama wasn't... well, I'm a jerk. She has a gift for looking absolutely horrifying.

Korosensei Weakness Number Twenty-Four: As expected, he's scared of the supernatural.

Yeah, I was just waiting for that to happen, actually.

"Now that the fun's over," I said, listening to the various shrieks of horror, "let's get going."

"Okay~," Ritsu chirped.

In the end, Korosensei ended up lying flat, face-down in the beach sand at the exit to the cave. "Haah... hahh..." he panted. "What an unmitigated disgrace..."

"So let me get this straight," Maehara said. "This whole thing was about scaring us into hooking up so you could have material for a book?"

Called it~.

"So knew that's what you were doing," Okano said.

"What's wrong with seeing tender feelings blossom between two bright young things?" Korosensei sobbed. "Before their best years are behind them, and they're stuck in a loveless marriage, and..."

I kinda tuned him out at that point. The suspension bridge effect was true, yes, but it would only really work if the event was sufficiently arousing - wrong word, shit. If the event sufficiently raised the heart rate - better word choice, me - enough that the subject wouldn't notice. Then, they would hopefully see the target of their affections and subconsciously mistake the accelerated rate from tension for affection and romantic feelings.

This was dumb, in other words.

"Are we sure he's an adult?" Kimura asked.

"Not that we don't appreciate the thought and all, but c'mon," Nakamura said. "We're just kids. Did it maybe occur to you that some of us don't feel like being in a relationship. I mean, out of all of us, Nick's the only one that's in a stable relationship right now, and that's saying something."

I frowned. Should... Should I be offended by that, or flattered? The little wink and grin Nakamura sent my way didn't make things any clearer.

"And no offense, but isn't shipping us sort of creepy?" the blonde continued.

I grinned. Oh, I had thoughts on some of the class, but it was way more fun to watch the idiots dance around each other like flailing teenagers. Which, to be honest, is what they were. So sue me, I couldn't get my usual fill of watching Kazuto effortlessly attract every female in a five-kilometer radius, I had to get my kicks somewhere.

"I know, I'm sorry..." Korosensei sobbed.

"Pathetic!" Professor Bitch's voice rang out, uh... bitchily. "You call that a test of courage? There was no one in there! What a waste."

I glanced over at the last pair to exit the cave. She says that, but she's still clinging onto Karasuma's arm for dear life. "You can let go of my arm any day now," our teacher said pointedly. "This is not what I need after an all-nighter."

"Ugh, shut up!" Professor Bitch snapped. "You're a man, aren't ya? It's your damn responsibility to escort pretty women!"

I just groaned and introduced the heel of my palm to my forehead. Really. This is what's happening now. Gods, just end my suffering already. Tonight is going to be relationship drama night, isn't it?

As soon as Professor Bitch caught all of us watching her little fit, she dropped Karasuma's arm and tried to tiptoe away casually, giggling nervously like she'd been able to hide her obvious infatuation with Karasuma.

"Hey," one of the guys said. "Is anyone else thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?"

"That Professor Bitch is..." Kurahashi trailed off meaningfully. Nakamura grinned.

"Should we do something?" Maehara asked.

Nakamura nodded. "We don't head home until tomorrow morning, so there's time~."

"Let's hook them up," Korosensei said darkly, eyes gleaming with mischief. Every other member of Class E, barring Nagisa, had the exact same expression on their face.

This. This is my life now. The last mission on this vacation was going to be trying to ship Professor Bitch with Karasuma.

Kana, Shino, Asuna, Kazuto, anybody, please just someone save me from hormonal teenagers.

...

"Ugh," Professor Bitch moaned back at the hotel, "you're killing me. The man's so obtuse."

I mean, I'll bitch and moan, but I'm still going to watch this amazing train wreck. Kinda like Karma, who is currently leaning against the veranda pillar across from me.

"Isn't that a bit out of character for you?" Maehara needled her. "You're supposed to be known for wrapping guys around your little finger."

"But when it comes to her own love life," Kayano added, "she doesn't have a clue."

"Oh, knock it off," Professor Bitch snapped. "Love? Don't make me laugh."

"What? You're not in love?"

I grinned. "Ooh, quick, someone tell Kurahashi that Karasuma's back on the market."

The girl in question frowned at me. "Jerk," she muttered. Yes, that is true. Though I guess I probably shouldn't make fun of her. The heart likes whomever it likes, I think. I wouldn't know, since my heart is all kinds of fucked up and also very much devoted towards Kana.

"No!" Professor Bitch said. "I'm attracted to the challenge of conquering a world-class square! I just... wanted to see if I could make him fall for me, that's all..."

That? That was definitely a hundred percent believable.

(It really wasn't.)

Professor Bitch blushed. "And I got... carried away," she admitted bashfully.

Every other guy in the class stiffened suddenly, their cheeks going red. "That... was kinda adorable," Sugino said.

"More like embarrassing," Maehara said.

"Don't judge me!" Professor Bitch snapped.

I guess I really can't get on anyone's case about awkward love lives, given that the relationship chart of my friend group looks like someone threw a plate of spaghetti on the ground. Spaghetti that was like, magnetically attracted to one particular meatball. Meanwhile, there's the Nick meatball and the Kana meatball off to the side, nuzzling against each other with a single noodle between them, aaaand I think this simile got lost somewhere in translation.

"Hey, it's cool, really!" Maehara told our teacher. "We've got this! Let us set the stage, and you can take it from there!" Professor Bitch actually looked surprised by this.

Nakamura grinned and nodded. "Yeah!"

"Well, if you think you can..." Professor Bitch said.

Suddenly Okajima held up a whiteboard reading 'Karasuma + Irina Pair-up Plan'. Korosensei slid in from out of nowhere, dressed up in a suit with glasses. "Excellent," he said smoothly. "In that case I call the Class 3-E love consultant meeting to order."

"Eager much, octopus?" Professor Bitch grumbled.

"Come now," Korosensei said, adjusting his glasses. "It's only natural to encourage romance between colleagues." As if his oily words weren't obvious enough, the bright pink color his face turned kinda gave away his real intentions. "A female educator aching for the touch of her stoic counterpart...! If that's not a trashy bestseller in the making, I don't know what is!"

Nagisa stared at Korosensei in surprise. "I think you're planning something racier than we are," he said. Really, though, is he surprised at this point?

"If we're going to do this right," Maehara began, "we're gonna have to start by overhauling your fashion sense." I looked at Professor Bitch; her clothes revealed more skin than they covered.

Nakamura nodded. "I'll say. Revealing might be appealing for some people, but parading the goods doesn't cut it for a stuffed shirt like Karasuma. Your wardrobe should be more... understated."

Professor Bitch blinked in thought. "Understated... Huh, okay then."

"Use the way Kanzaki dresses as a model and you can't go wrong," Nakamura said. Behind her, Kanzaki let out a quiet murmur of surprise. "As a matter of fact, is what you wore yesterday dry?" If I remember, it was some frilly light green and white dress thing.

Kanzaki smiled. "Yes, of course." She hurried off to her hotel room.

After Professor Bitch got changed, Nakamura grinned. "See? It makes you look like a..."

She trailed off.

Yeah, the dress didn't really change anything.

"How in the world did that make her even sexier!" the class roared.

"Well, to begin with, the fit's a little snug in places," Sugaya said.

Okajima turned to glance at the mortified Kanzaki. "Man, I don't even wanna tell you about what I think about when Kanzaki's in that thing..."

I just patted the sobbing girl's back soothingly. "You'll, uh... you'll get over it?" I offered.

"Fine, whatever," Okano sighed. "Huge boobs we can work with. Not like we have a choice... Bust size doesn't really matter that much anyway!" Kayano nodded furiously.

Heh. I sense jealousy in the air.

"Have we established Mr. Karasuma's type?" Korosensei asked, poking at the bridge of his glasses.

"Yeah," Yada said, clapping a fist into an open palm. "That girl in the ad, I think he's... I don't know, eerily infatuated with her. Said she's his ideal type or something."

What ad?

I poked Ritsu, and she obligingly played the ad for us.

"Oh gods," I muttered in horrified fascination. "This... simultaneously surprises me far more and far less than it really should."

Three muscular women were promoting some brand of something. Two were shooting laser beams out of their eyes, and the third was flexing.

"He likes his ideal military type!" the class shouted.

Okuda raised a hand. "Well, the quickest way to a man's heart is his stomach!" she said. "They serve some pretty good stuff here! We could arrange it so that the two of you eat his favorite dish together on the beach!"

"Trouble is, I've only ever seen the guy eat burgers and cup ramen, though," Maehara said.

Nakamura grinned weakly. "Doesn't exactly set the mood for a romantic evening."

I grinned. Karasuma, sitting on the beach with Professor Bitch. The sun is setting, and he takes her hand in his. She swoons, and he whispers, 'Would you like fries with that?'

...My imagination is fucked up.

"Grr..." Korosensei groaned. "This match was doomed from the start!"

Maehara frowned in thought. "Yeah, I'm starting to think the problem here is Mr. Karasuma."

"See!" Professor Bitch exclaimed. "He's such an idiot!"

"I should have seen it before!" Korosensei sobbed. "A man who never laughs at my jokes is a lost cause!"

That's just because you're not funny, sir.

I do, however, appreciate that the go-to default when we run out of options is insulting Karasuma, though.

Korosensei dried his tears. "There's no help for it," he said. "But still, let's do what we can before dinner. The ladies are in charge of hair and makeup! The gentlemen are tasked with setting just the right ambience for the table."

"Roger," we all said, some more and less enthused. I was less enthused, naturally. I was probably just going to find a spot and read until dinner, since my skills were less than useful in the world of relationships.

Dinner started late, and I was more than ready to eat. When the fancy restaurant finally let us eat, I took a seat with Karma, Nagisa, and Kayano. The menu looked alright, I guess, given that I didn't have to pay for anything and my food was probably going to set a world record for how fast it was going to disappear.

A few minutes into the light-hearted pre-dinner chatter, Karasuma wandered in to the seating area. "We're supposed to be eating as a group, right?" he asked, scanning the tables. "So, where do I sit?"

Nakamura and Okano were in charge of filling up the remaining empty seats. Nakamura was fulfilling her duties by reclining and stretching out on the couch, while Okano was pulling off some splits that were painful to watch. I have no idea how that girl pulls it off. "Well, not here, obviously," Nakamura said without even opening her eyes. "It looks like there isn't enough room."

"Is our favorite teacher trying to force his way into a seat?" Okano asked in faux shock.

"Honestly, you'd just get in the way here," Nakamura continued. "How about you be a good sport about it and eat your dinner outside, okay?"

Karasuma just stared at them. "Uh...?"

Poor guy. Subject to E Class's apparently famous teacher bullying.

After he wandered outside, muttering something under his breath about being out of touch, the entirety of E Class looked at each other, nodded, and as one zoomed over to the veranda to watch the drama unfold. I went to the window to watch, mainly out of curiosity of how this would turn out rather than any investment in the outcome.

Now, had we wagered on it, that would be an entirely different story altogether. Greed usually beats Sloth.

I have to admit, the girls did a good job with Professor Bitch. Her hair was pulled up into a ponytail and her usual skimpy attire was covered by a nice-looking shawl that I think Hara made. Of course, Karasuma didn't mention any of that. "Why the hell'd just the two of us get kicked out?" Karasuma asked her as he sat down at the table.

Seriously though, c'mon. A single table on the beach?

"Oh, uh, who knows?" Professor Bitch stammered. A far cry from her usual composed and elegant self.

Off to the side, I saw Kurahashi staring at Karasuma and weeping tears of anguish, biting down on her handkerchief. Part of me wanted to go over and poke fun at her, and while it seemed like a fun idea it probably wasn't a very good one. Instead, I just returned to my seat and leaned back in my chair, staring at the ceiling.

Man. Today kinda... disappeared, didn't it.

After a few minutes I glanced out the window again. The class was shouting at Professor Bitch and she was shouting right back.

I, uh, take it the date didn't go so well, then. Not that I was expecting anything to come of this, really. In game terms, Karasuma would have a hundred percent resistance to the Charm status effect. Professor Bitch could stack as many buffs as she wanted, Karasuma would still just nope it. Well, at least we learned one thing:

Karasuma Weakness Number One: Denser than dense.

Summer vacation was coming along quite nicely until I got somewhat of an uninvited guest. "Weyr," Asano said, standing in front of my door when I opened it.

"What's up, Heir Apparent?" I snarked right back. "What's so vital that you came all this way to talk to a lowly Class E student?"

He gritted his teeth, and I grinned lazily. This was fun, trying to piss him off as much as possible. He clearly had a message he needed to deliver, so might as well enjoy myself. "I'm here to invite you to Class A," he said through a clenched jaw. "Your scores are exemplary and I have already obtained permission from -"

"Nah I'm good," I said, closing the door in his face.

He knocked again.

I opened it. "We're closed," I growled, and slammed the door again.

He knocked again.

"Whatever you're selling, I don't want any."

Slam.

Knock knock knock.

Mother fu- "Okay, seriously, piss right the fuck off," I snapped at him. "I'm not joining your little coterie, just accept that already."

"I refuse to accept no," he said.

"There's a name for people like you," I hissed.

"Persistent?"

I rolled my eyes. "I was thinking either stalker or asshole, but sure let's go with persistent." Hm... If I close the door again, he's just going to continue knocking. And I'm pretty sure I'd end up expelled if he ended up with a broken jaw and wrists, so taking care of things the easy way is out too. "Alright, fine," I said. "How about this. You prove to me that A Class won't be a colossal waste of my time and I'll switch classes."

The first-ranked student studied me carefully. I had to be on my toes with this kid, since he was the principal's son. If I wasn't careful, he'd swindle me right into A Class, and while that'd be an interesting plot twist I happen to enjoy trying to kill Korosensei. "And how would you propose I do that?" he asked finally.

"How about another wager?" I asked with a shrug. "You find someone else that's willing to switch classes, and if they make the swap permanently then I'll come along for the ride. A two for one deal, let's say." I tilted my head. "But on the other hand, if they come back to E Class, you don't try to shanghai me again. Sound like a deal?"

"No one else can know about this," he said immediately. "I don't want the second student's choice being affected by knowledge of his importance."

"Fine, fine, whatever, I won't blab," I said. "Look, just... go bother someone else, I'm tired of dealing with you." I didn't sleep well last night, so dealing with this shit is just asking way, way too much of me. "Now leave me alone." With a final slam, I closed the door. Thankfully, he didn't keep knocking.

I wonder who he's gonna pick. The class is largely a single unit, with very few dissenters now that Terasaka has been assimilated into the fold. Who's the loose thread he'll pick at?

Meh, I'll worry about it when it comes up.

...

"A summer festival?" Karma asked, staring at Korosensei.

It was kinda awkward, since Karma and I had been hanging out and relaxing by playing some video games in his room when Korosensei just appeared in his window. Apparently, there was going to be a summer festival at seven tonight. "I just thought of it today," Korosensei cried. "I asked the whole class, but... almost everyone seems to have other plans!"

"I for one am shocked by that revelation," I said drily. "Shocked, I tell you."

"I'm starting to feel rejected..." Korosensei cried.

Karma looked at me, and I raised an eyebrow before shrugging. He nodded and turned off the console before turning to Korosensei. "Alright," he said. "We'll go." Korosensei laughed and clapped his hands together. "It's not like we were doing anything else anyway," he continued.

I glanced off to the side of Karma's desk, where a bunch of references books were sitting. Eh, whatever.

The festival Korosensei led us to was bright and cheerful, and for a second my stomach clenched. I'd... I'd never been to a festival with Kana. The only summer it was possible, she'd been away the entire time.

Gods I missed my girlfriend.

"Are you okay, Nick?" Isogai asked.

Maehara nodded. "Yeah, that was a pretty heavy sigh there, man."

I shook my head. "Just... nah, it's nothing. Just me being stupid."

I wandered the festival and grabbed a few snacks while drifting from stall to stall. Crowded places weren't really my idea of a good time to begin with, and I was never one for window shopping. Still, I ran into a few of the students from class; Yada and Kurahashi were talking about getting some great deal or another, Okajima was fiddling with a camera, and Kanzaki and Kataoka were laughing about some fizzy drink they were trying out. Kayano and Nagisa were off chatting with Korosensei, and Karma was busy blackmailing some stall out of a high-value game console.

Typical Karma, really. He knew there was no winning string in that game before he even walked over, but he decided to teach the bully a lesson anyway.

I watched Chiba and Hayami get kicked out of the shooting gallery after knocking over ninety percent of the prizes; it was admittedly kinda fun to watch the two of them get all depressed about it.

Basically, all the ladies looked lovely in their traditional yukatas - I'm assuming, since I'm, well, me - and the guys were having the time of their life earning ridiculous amounts of rewards at all the booths.

Ignoring the rest, I kinda just looked at all the stalls, grabbed something tasty for dinner, and then sauntered off behind the nearby shrine to eat in peace. If I were with Kana, or my family? Definitely a different story. But by myself, I just wanted to relax.

As I passed, I briefly stopped to chat with Nagisa and Kayano while they were busy scooping water balloon yo-yos out of the water. Some kid was watching them in awe as they casually grabbed ball after ball. "Wow, everybody's raking it in," Kayano said.

"Yeah, turns out assassination skills come in handy in the everyday world," Nagisa said.

Kayano grinned. "Like getting all the men in the Chamber of Commerce tent to buy you drinks? I can see that." I glanced over, and sure enough Professor Bitch was living it up in there.

"Where's Korosensei?" Nagisa asked.

"Being entrepreneurial," Kayano replied. "End of the month, he's strapped for cash." She pointed off to the side.

"The food stalls?!" Nagisa yelped. "Really?" I'm amazed the general public hasn't discovered this idiot already, the way he was running ten different stands at once. Funnily enough, the stands were ones that E Class had driven out of business by eating up all of their prizes.

While they were distracted, I caught the attention of the kid watching those two scoop water balloons before winking. Carefully, I snatched up one of Nagisa's prizes without him noticing and sauntered over to the kid. "Here," I said. "Take it. They won't mind." He grinned up at me and bolted, running off. When I turned back, Kayano was watching me, and I shrugged guilelessly.

Meh, I felt like being mean to Nagisa.

After that, though, I found a nice comfy place to sit back and relax, leaning against a torii gate. A loud bang startled me at first until I realized it was just the fireworks show starting, and relaxed against the painted wood again. Hng... I'm tired.

I haven't been sleeping well. No matter how much I exercise before bed, I don't sleep well.

Damn it all. This is why I need my family. If Kana were here... Well, if Kana were here I'd be able to cuddle up next to her and sleep like a log.

"Ah, Nick," Korosensei said, and I lazily rolled my head to look at him. I wasn't startled, I'd heard him coming. "So this is where you've run off to."

"Just enjoying the quiet," I said simply. "Looks like you've made out like a bandit," I said, staring meaningfully at the sack of cash he was holding.

"Indeed!" he said. "Even if I subtract for essential expenses, I should have no problem paying for snacks in September."

"Cool."

Korosensei stashed the cash somewhere. "Oh, have you heard the news?"

I shook my head. "Ritsu didn't tell me anything vital. Is it important?"

Korosensei wriggled his tentacles. "As it turns out, your assassination attempt on me this summer didn't go unnoticed! The upshot is, if a group kills me, the reward money is tripled!"

"Cool."

I went back to staring at the fireworks. Korosensei didn't seem to mind.

"And how about you?" he asked someone else. I glanced his way, but he was looking over my shoulder. "I hope you were able to enjoy yourself! Classes start tomorrow, so I'll see you bright and -"

The student said something. I didn't even need to look to see who it was; I recognized the voice.

"...Eh?" Korosensei asked flatly, as if he couldn't believe what he'd just heard. "You're leaving... Class E?"

A firework burst overhead.

Hm. So this was Asano's play, was it? Well, let the game begin.

Standing, I stretched out. "So, by the way, Korosensei," I said. "This is probably a good time to let you know that I'm heading to Class A too. Got asked by Asano the Younger directly, aren't I important..."

"Eh?!" Korosensei exclaimed.

The problem with being sworn to silence was that I knew all kinds of fun stuff, but I couldn't tell anybody or snark about comments that were just horribly wrong. It also didn't help that I had to keep track of who knew what; Korosensei knew that I was leaving, but not why, Asano knew everything, and Class E had no idea I was about to ditch them for a bit. And absolutely nobody knew anything about my true past.

Either way, the opening ceremony of the second semester was about as tedious as the others. "I mean, it hasn't even started and I already want to leave," I sighed.

Okano just patted my back. "You'll survive," she said with zero trace of sympathy in her voice. Mean.

Well, the summer is over, I guess. Six months. Six months until Korosensei destroys the planet. Six months to kill our teacher.

"It's been a while, Class E," a familiarly annoying voice said.

I craned my neck back to look at the four idiots that were bothering us. "I'm sure the second semester's gonna be tough," the one guy said. English Guy? No, no, he was language... Or social studies? No, wait, I was right the first time, he's the English guy.

"Try not to get too upset, geheheheh," Science Guy laughed. Still laughing, the Big Five minus Asano wandered over to where Class A was grouping.

Huh. Just a few months and I already forgot their names. Guess they're just that forgettable. Still, it pinged my radar that they were smiling and laughing despite their humiliating defeat in the finals. They probably know something E Class doesn't - and I think I know what.

"...Now then," Announcer Guy said - Seo! That's English Guy's name, Seo! - as the most recent speakers trooped off the stage. "I have one last announcement for everyone before this ceremony ends. Starting today, Class 3-A will be adding a new member to their ranks. And until yesterday, he was in Class E."

That little bombshell jolted the class, shocking them all. "However," Araki - Oh, shoot, that's Announcer Guy's name! I remembered! Go me~ - continued, "with hard work and effort, he has earned excellent grades and the permission to return to the main school building. Well then," Araki said, "let us hear his words of joy!"

The student in question walked onto stage, clutching a folded piece of paper.

"Koutaro Takebayashi!" Araki exclaimed.

Takebayashi stood in front of the announcer's microphone and unfolded what was probably a speech prepared by Asano. Meanwhile, Class E couldn't possibly believe what was happening.

"I have spent over three months with Class E," Takebayashi said. "Simply put, that environment was hell. My classmates had no drive, and the teachers had given up on us. I realized the price I paid for slacking. 'I want to go back to the main school building.' That goal drove me to study as if my life depended on it. From the bottom of my heart, I'm overjoyed that I am able to return. I will work hard so that I never fall into Class E again. That is all."

He bowed to the silent auditorium.

Stunned silence reigned.

Until finally, a single pair of hands started clapping as Takebayashi walked off-stage. Asano walked on from the wings, smiling angelically. "Welcome back, Takebayashi," he said.

The rest of the auditorium, now that they had an idea how to react, went to it with a will, wildly applauding and cheering for Takebayashi's return.

...

"What's with that guy?!" Maehara shouted, slamming his fist against the wall. "I can't believe he even threw away a chance at ten billion yen to ditch us!"

"And he even said this place was hell!" Kimura protested.

Okano nodded. "Even if he was forced to say that, that's just wrong."

Kataoka sat at her desk, staring at its surface. "It's true that Takebayashi's grades suddenly improved," she said, "but I think that's only because he was taught by Korosensei. If he forgot that, then I can't look at him the same way."

The more high-strung members of the class kept shouting, winding themselves up, while I calmly packed up my bag. As I slid open the door, about to step out of the classroom, Yada asked, "Nick? Where are you going?"

I turned to see her watching me. The rest of the class was looking my way too, even the ones that were just shouting. "Gotta chat with Karasuma," I said easily. "Need to figure out what the schedule is."

"What schedule?" Isogai asked.

My lips twitched upwards. "I'll be ducking out of Class E for a while. Gonna sit in on some A Class lectures."

They all stared at me in shock.

"So, I'm not sure if Karasuma wants me to sign a nondisclosure agreement, or what, so... yeah. See ya." I swung my backpack on my back and walked out, ignoring the renewed shouting as I left. I pointedly didn't look back. Kana wouldn't be happy with the path I've taken, but I had no choice left.

Karasuma wasn't exactly happy to see me go. "I can't say I understand why you've been allowed to do this, but as it's temporary I'll be relying on your judgment," he said. "You understand you are never to disclose anything about the assassination, correct?"

I rolled my eyes and adjusted my glasses. "Yeah, yeah, got it boss man," I sighed. These Ministry agents are such a pain, sometimes. Though, to be fair, Mr. K's usually pretty cool. It's just that asshole Kikuoka I have a grudge against.

"Nick," he said suddenly as I turned to leave.

"Mm?"

"This is temporary, isn't it?"

My lips twitched. "Well, we'll see. If it isn't, I suppose I'll be talking to you again."

He didn't say anything else as I walked out.

As I was leaving class for the day, I saw Takebayashi walking ahead of me. Class E looked like they were waiting in force by the edge of the campus.

I wasn't sure if I wanted to talk to them or not.

"Hey, Takebayashi!" Isogai called out.

Despite my better judgment, I wandered over to stand a small distance away. Enough that I could hear the conversation, not enough that I was going to be a part of it. My role, like always, was to be the bystander. As I approached E Class, Karma's eyes flicked towards me before they flashed with scorn and he turned back to Takebayashi.

That... hurt a surprising amount.

"Care to explain?" Isogai said when Takebayashi remained silent. "Why didn't you discuss this with us, Takebayashi?"

"There's a reason for this, right?" Okuda asked. "You helped out so much during our summer vacation trip! And we had fun together in the regular school year, too, right?" I disagree. He... didn't really contribute.

"Turns out," Karma said lazily, "depending on how we kill Korosensei, they might raise the ten billion reward even higher. I guess you don't need your share, then. That's okay, it means more for us. How noble of you to give it up."

"...One billion yen at best," Takebayashi said after a long silence, adjusting his glasses. E Class didn't seem to understand. "There's no way I'd be able to kill Korosensei on my own. Even if I helped kill him, the help I'd be able to provide... would be worth one billion yen at best. My family has been running a hospital for generations. A billion yen is something they could earn by working.

"It's a household with the motto, 'Naturally you succeeded'. Since I can't ever succeed, I'm not treated as part of the family. Even if I got my hands on a billion yen, they would never accept me. 'Good for you, the black sheep of the family had his life saved by luck,' they'd say, and that would be it." He pushed at the bridge of his glasses while the class stared at him silently. "Did you know, I was able to report my grades to my parents for the first time this year yesterday. I told them I had received good grades and could leave E Class.

"'You worked hard,' my father said. 'You were able to hang on by a thread.' Just to hear those words, I had to push myself so hard." Kanzaki flinched at Takebayashi's words. "For me, the most important thing, even more than the end of the world, or ten billion yen, is being accepted by my family." He turned. "I know that I'm a traitor, and that I'm being ungrateful. I hope your assassination goes well."

As Takebayashi started walking away, Nagisa stepped forward. "Hold on, Takeba-"

But before he could get it out, Kanzaki grabbed his arm. "Don't, Nagisa," she said, smiling despite the pain and pity on her face. "Parent's chains... they bind you painfully and don't let go. So... don't try to pull him away by force."

I let my gaze sweep over E Class, feeling the weight of their eyes on me. Silently, I turned and kept walking. Nobody said anything. And why would they? I was the traitor, here. I was the one that left. I deserved their scorn, really.

Didn't stop me from feeling the viper burn inside my chest.

The next day, I started on my path to go up the hill before I snorted and shook my head at my own stupidity. Normally, I'd be walking up that path, maybe running into Kayano or Nagisa on the way; Ritsu might be chatting happily to me, telling me about what she did over the night while we were away.

My phone was silent. I didn't know anyone on the walk to class 3-A.

The school building was much nicer than I was used to; the air conditioning worked, first of all, so it didn't feel like I was going to melt at any second in the heat. The lights in the tiled hallways actually worked, and I could see that the classes all had the newest desks and chairs just by walking by the rooms. Basically, almost every amenity conceivable was made available to the kids that worked hard and produced results.

When I walked into the classroom, the eyes of the students snapped to me and I had to fight down a reflexive flinch. Despite that, my fist clenched, hidden by the shadow of my body. Kill them all, the viper whispered. And oh gods, how I wanted to.

"Ah, Weyr, you've arrived," Asano said, a small smile on his face. It was almost impressive; if I'd been anyone else, I would have missed the smugness lurking. "I'm so glad you decided to take me up on my offer to join Class A."

"To audit A Class, and see if it interested me," I corrected him. The other people in the class bristled, and a lazy smirk spread across my lips. "So far, I'm not very impressed. Anyway, where do I sit?"

Asano, to his credit, didn't rise to the bait and just showed me to my seat. Off to the side, Takebayashi was talking to a few of the students near his seat. "Are you ready for class, Takebayashi?" one said. "I'm sure E Class's teacher was accommodating, but Class A moves fast so don't fall behind."

Takebayashi just chuckled. "You're making me nervous."

"You were finally able to return to the front stage," Asano said. "I'm sure you'll do fine. It'll be tough, but let's work hard together, right?" he said with a smile so obviously fake even Takebayashi picked up on it.

"Thanks, Asano," he said, taking a seat as the bell rang.

I gave up trying to pay attention to the lecture about five minutes in to the math. Instead, I just casually pulled out a book and started reading, glancing up at the board every thirty seconds or so to keep up with what the teacher was writing. I noticed that Takebayashi had stopped taking notes and was just staring blankly at the board. A few of the A Class students were looking at him in concern, but quickly returned to their own notes.

I just rolled my eyes and glanced up at the board. This was an A Class lesson?

And they called themselves the chosen ones. Pathetic.

This wasn't even new material. We covered it back in the first semester in E Class. And the teacher wasn't even trying to break down the material, he was just talking into the blackboard and book, writing and erasing, writing and erasing. He didn't care about the students' comprehension of the lesson. This was, as far as I could tell, specifically designed to eliminate those who couldn't keep up.

I could smell the principal's fingerprints all over this teaching style, and my lip curled.

At least I'd get some reading done.

Finally, I was free from the torturous tedium that was A Class lessons, and closed my book. I'd finished the first one I brought and swapped them out during the lunch break; everyone else in the class had been busy studying, so I doubt they even noticed when I slipped out. Zero situational awareness. They'd be dead in hours, if not minutes in Aincrad.

I took my time packing up my materials, even if I didn't bother taking any notes past the morning's lecture. I had a feeling I'd be approached by someone fairly soon.

A Class was incredibly underwhelming. The students treated each other completely normally; even I, despite my clear lack of giving a fuck about the lesson, was treated as a 'classmate'. So long as you weren't in E Class, they'll treat you like a normal student instead of the gross gum on the bottom of their shoes.

But none of them had any chance to relax. The only ones who seemed capable of taking a break were the few capable students, like the Big Five. I could hear them making plans to throw a party at Stupid Haircut's home the next day, even as other A Class students ran out the door to go to supplemental lessons. Lessons that probably wouldn't be necessary if the teaching style wasn't shit.

I glanced out the window and, to my complete lack of surprise, saw a couple figures hiding in the nearby bushes. It was almost impressive; the E Class students surreptitiously watching over Takebayashi were putting Karasuma's latest camouflage technique to use to try to blend in. I shook my head and sighed. The only problem with their technique was that the leaves and bushes near E Class were completely different from the ones on the main campus, so the watchers stood out a lot. Also the giant black object that I could only assume was Korosensei. That was a little suspicious too.

Takebayashi seemed to notice them as well, though he just looked at the floor silently.

I knew Asano was moving towards Takebayashi before he even crossed my field of vision; the boy was hardly subtle. "How is it, Takebayashi?" he asked. "Have you gotten used to the class?"

Takebayashi jumped and stammered, "S-somewhat."

Asano nodded. "I know this is sudden, but the board chairman is asking to meet with you. You, the hero who overcame adversity... It seems you're needed."

Takebayashi nodded.

I was next on Asano's list of stops. "Nick," he said. At least he didn't have the gall to try smiling at me.

I mean, I wasn't giving him so much as a grin, but he didn't try to pretend to be nice to me. "What."

"After meeting with Takebayashi, the chairman would like to speak with you," he said.

I shrugged. "Sure, let's go meet with your dad." I smirked slightly at Asano's twitch. Daddy issues, huh? What fun.

I'd never actually been in the principal's office before, even if all I was doing was waiting in the adjoining room. At least I got to sit in a comfortable chair, for all of the five seconds before I slouched down and closed my eyes, letting out a yawn. Mmn, I'm exhausted. Not giving a shit all day really tires me out.

The aura of command startled me and I snapped an eye open, watching carefully as Principal Asano walked by me on the way to the office where Takebayashi and Asano the Younger were waiting. He glanced my way and gave me a perfunctory smile that we both knew was fake, and then pushed the door open. "My, I've kept you two waiting!" I heard him say just before the door closed.

I sighed and closed my eyes again, trying to let the tension bleed a little bit away. There was this pressure in the back of my neck, and no matter how many times I tried to crack my neck it just wouldn't go away.

It took about ten minutes for Takebayashi to be finished with his meeting. When he walked out of the office, he seemed pale and shaken. I wonder what the heck happened in there? Oh well. Probably nothing important that definitely won't impact my course of action in the recent future hahaha who am I kidding of course it will, this is all a play by the Asano Tag Team.

"Ah, Weyr," Principal Asano said almost casually as I took a seat in the office. "It's good of you to come."

"You asked, sir," I said with a shrug.

"Of course, of course," he said. "You are... second in the year, correct? Behind my own son, of course."

I raised an eyebrow. Yeah... I'm pretty sure every single person in this room knows that, guy, why are you repeating it for no reason?

"Now," Principal Asano said, folding his hands in front of him on his desk, "I'm sure you're wondering why I asked to meet with you. It's simple. Young Takebayashi has just agreed to be reborn as one of the strong. Now, I'm well aware of your little wager with my son."

Asano nodded. "Once Takebayashi gives his speech at the assembly celebrating Kunugigaoka's anniversary, asking to form the Management Committee, you'll be up next and letting everyone know you're joining A Class for good."

"Quite the coup," I said nonchalantly. "Snatching the two highest-scoring members from E Class, one of whom was only one point behind Asano himself. Why, if I didn't know better, I'd say you were almost afraid of E Class's capabilities, sir."

I held back the shiver as Principal Asano's eyes grew colder. I stared down the Gleam Eyes, bitch, you don't scare me. "But, since I'm very much fond of how things are right now," I said, "I wouldn't say that. Obviously. I'll give whatever speech is needed, don't worry."

The principal smiled, even though his eyes were cold and piercing. Heartless. "Excellent," he said, standing up and coming around the desk to rest a hand on my shoulder. "I'm glad you've chosen to embrace your path as one of the strong, Weyr. I foresee great things ahead of you. Do try to pay attention in class, though, hm? Your scores won't stay so high if you don't take notes."

My hands twitched as I felt the skittering of a centipede across my neck.

Gods, he's creepy.

I stood up once the principal left the room. Asano Junior was kind enough to wait for me, probably if only to keep an eye on me so that I didn't trash the place the instant I was left alone like some sort of shrieking howler-monkey.

...Damn, what a missed opportunity, because I would have done that just out of spite for the principal's attempt to intimidate me.

"Don't worry," I said as we left. "I wasn't going to smash all his neat little glass award thingies."

Asano snorted. "If you had, no matter what happened you'd be out of A Class. I don't know the particulars, but some poor fool broke one of his trophies and was sent straight to E Class. The same fate is waiting for anyone that breaks any of the chairman's personal belongings."

I raised an eyebrow. "Including you, I'm guessing?"

"Of course," Asano said. "Like I told Takebayashi, even when dealing with his own son the chairman doesn't hold back."

"Ah," I said noncommittally before turning to leave. "Well, I'm off. That little assembly thing is tomorrow, right? I'll be there."

This might actually turn out to be fun after all.

The next day, the assembly was called and the gym filled up with people again. After a few perfunctory remarks, Takebayashi took the stage again, bowing lightly. I could feel the aura of tension in the air; the other students were shifting in place, looking up at Takebayashi without really knowing what was going to happen. As for me, I was standing in the wings with Asano, watching and waiting for my turn to speak.

Takebayashi bowed lightly and brought out a piece of paper that had to be his speech. I shifted weight, running my tongue across the edge of my teeth. Bloodlust... I can sense it coming from him. Something... Something important is about to be totally destroyed.

Beside me, Asano watched Takebayashi with a smug smile on his face. Whatever speech Takebayashi was going to give, whatever speech they'd prepared for him, I didn't know what it was going to be. He was definitely pleased with himself, though. My own smile widened in preparation.

While I didn't know what was going to happen, I knew how Class E worked.

"Please," Takebayashi said, "Listen to what I would like to do." Asano crossed his arms, clearly satisfied. "Class E was a class full of weak people. Because they lack what we call academic strength, they are discriminated against by everyone from the main building."

He spread his arms, a small smile pulling at his lips. "But for me, that Class E, is almost as comfortable to be in as a maid cafe."

I'm sorry fuck the what.

Comfortable as a what now?

The wave of confusion and surprise swept over the entire auditorium, audibly shocking the listening students. Asano had a particularly enjoyable visceral reaction, lunging forward and then just barely stopping himself from storming on stage, like he couldn't believe what he was hearing. Only practice at hiding my emotions behind a stoic mask kept me from showing the depths of my own surprise and confusion. I was able to keep it down to a single eyebrow raising as I folded my arms, watching to see where this was going to go.

"...I was lying," Takebayashi admitted. "Because I wanted to be strong. Because I wanted to be accepted. But, even though I was the most useless student in E Class and betrayed them on top of that, my classmates still came to see how I was doing, many times. My teacher tried every method and scheme possible to teach me, even for a student like me with no knack for studying. I, someone unaccepted by my family and everyone on this campus, was treated as an equal by everyone of Class E."

I could see the kids in E Class smiling at each other, even while the main campus brats stared on in horror at the blasphemy Takebayashi was spewing.

"All of you," Takebayashi said, "who are aiming to become strong and be accepted by society... I believe you are right, and respect you. But, for a little while longer, I'm fine with being weak. While bearing with weakness, and enjoying weakness," he said, "I will return to my life of aiming for the necks of the strong."

A comfortable chill ran down my spine. The bloodlust was amping up. Whatever was going to happen was happening soon.

"Have you lost it, you damn pawn?!" Asano growled, storming on stage. "Take it back and apologize, Takebayashi!" he snapped. "If you don't..."

He trailed off and I grinned. Takebayashi was calmly holding up a glass commemorative award, designating 'Gakuhou Asano' as the 'Best Educational Manager'. Hahaha...! I thought something looked off about the weighting of those awards.

"I swiped this from the chairman's room," Takebayashi said. "It's like a shield which commends a private school's best manager." He reached into his shirt and pulled out a small wooden knife, a strip of metal supporting one side. "The chairman is truly a strong person," he said. "All his actions are rational."

With a loud shattering sound, Takebayashi swung down and smashed the award to bits.

The entire auditorium gasped, staring in horror.

Heh. He actually looks pretty cool right now.

"According to Asano," Takebayashi continued, "in the past, another student did this same thing, or something like it. Thinking rationally, based on precedent..."

He smiled as he turned away from the microphone. "I'd say it's off to Class E for me as well."

While the auditorium was stunned into silence, Takebayashi strode off stage. The only sound was his footsteps echoing through the air.

"Hold it."

Asano clapped a hand on Takebayashi's shoulder just as Takebayashi slipped behind the curtains. "There really is no saving you, is there?" he asked. "And here we went through all this trouble to give you the chance to become strong, like us."

"Strong?" Takebayashi asked, adjusting his glasses. "It just looked like a group of people who were scared. You, and everyone else."

Asano's eyes widened, and then he gritted his teeth in pure rage, choking back harsh words. Wow, there's failure, and then there's that. He just got destroyed.

As Takebayashi disappeared, the auditorium starting to chatter, I laughed. Instantly, Asano's rage was directed my way. "Wow!" I said with a grin and gleeful chuckle. "I mean, I didn't even have to say anything! You people fucked it up all by yourselves!"

With a jaunty wave, I turned to follow Takebayashi. "Guess I'm not gonna be giving a speech," I said. "I mean, unless you really want me to make you people look even worse?" When he didn't reply, I grinned and slipped out the back.

The next morning, I slid open the door to E Class and stepped inside, heading to my desk like I hadn't taken the day... holy shit I was only in A Class for a day, but it felt like so much longer. The conversations going on between the others in the class went quiet; I was the last one to arrive. "Good morning, Nick," Ritsu greeted me, same as always. "How are you?"

"Mmmrghg."

"How were your lessons yesterday?"

"Bluhhhhhh."

Ritsu just giggled.

The rest of the class was just staring at me silently. I was trying my best not to shrink in on myself under their gaze, but it was hard. The silent scorn in their eyes was... It was hard to handle. It really shouldn't be, since I'd done shit like this before, but it was just harder to bear it for some reason.

"I think you owe us an explanation," Isogai said finally. My spine twitched a little bit, but I finished putting my bag away before turning to face them. "Like, why you ditched us for A Class."

"Alright," I croaked.

He blinked. "...That was easy."

I shrugged. "I can talk about now. Basically, Asano kept bugging me, so I told him fuck off. When he didn't, I told him find someone else and I'd be A Class as long as them. Couldn't tell E Class."

"Wait," Sugino said, "so that whole thing with Takebayashi was some weird mind game to get you in A Class?"

I shook my head. "Don't think so. Just target of opportunity. Principal Machiavelli would've probably still tried stunt if I wasn't here."

"Well, it was kind of a dick move," Maehara told me, "but you're back here, so it's all good. Welcome back to E Class."

I looked out at the class; most of them were smiling at me, though a few - Terasaka and Karma, really - were studiously pretending they didn't care. I took a seat, staring at the top of my desk. "...Thanks."

Later, the entire class was sitting on the exercise field in the back of the hill. "Beginning this second semester," Karasuma told us, "we will be including new elements to our assassinations. One of which will be explosives."

"E-Explosives?!" some of the class shouted. As for me, I was grinning wildly. I missed my Fire and Illusion magic from Alfheim.

"The power is very appealing from an assassination standpoint," Karasuma said, "but the dangerous way in which Terasaka and the others tried to use it is strictly forbidden."

I chuckled. Terasaka was staring blankly, while Nagisa just laughed weakly.

"So," Karasuma continued, "I want one of you to learn and remember every rule for the safe handling procedures of explosives." He dropped a stack of books on the ground, and I blinked. Holy shit that's a lot of books that are all incredibly thick. "My permission and the supervision of that one person will be the conditions for using explosives. Now, who's willing to learn it?"

Nobody really wanted to, and to be fair I couldn't exactly blame them. That stack was taller that Karasuma's head. I'd offer to learn myself, but my role was in the planning stages rather than the implementation. Whoever took the job, I'd probably end up looking over the manuals myself, but I couldn't juggle two major responsibilities like that.

"This isn't the knowledge that would help with studies, but... well, even this might come in handy sooner or later."

Karasuma blinked as the books were taken from his hand. The students around me started grinning. After a second, Karasuma smiled faintly and tapped at his forehead. "Can you memorize it? Takebayashi?"

The boy pressed at the bridge of his glasses. "Yes," he said. "If I turn it into a parody of the second season's OP, I'll get it done right away."

...What? I don't get it. Maybe I missed something. Was that an inside joke?

OH MAN it has been ages since I wrote a 10k chapter and IT FEELS GOOD

Anyway, we've moved on to Season 2 of the AssClass show and Book 2 of Nightblade IV. I think we all know where the third Book is going by this point, right? Right?

As for the chapter, it's two parts. First, I had to accelerate some of the stuff going on with Irina and Karasuma, mainly because Nick doesn't get to see her inner thoughts and monologues, and two he doesn't really care all that much? He's more interested in eating food than watching Irina flail around trying to breach Wall Karasuma. The chat with Ritsu in the cave… I'm not 100% satisfied with it? It conveys what it needs to, but part of me feels like something's missing. But at the same time Nick doesn't really know what he needs to say, so it's in-character. Who knows, maybe in the future I'll figure it out, stealth-update the chapter, and then remove this chunk of the Author Rant.

The second half of the chapter is the festival, also adapted from the first episode of Season 2. Nick is really too busy being mopey, so he doesn't get to enjoy the festival as much as he'd want. Really, though, he misses Kana. Poor guy. I don't like crowds at the best of times, and my experiences with this sort of thing (street, with food and games vendors) has been mostly consisting of 'okay yeah this is nice but I want to stop walking now'. In this case, it's a combination of being exhausted from not sleeping well, being lazy, and not having his girlfriend.

The third half (yes i know but i don't feel like changing the other two paragraphs so deal) is something from the manga that better explains a few things mentioned in the next chapter. Plus it lets Takebayashi get a chapter, and let's face it, Asano would totally try to snatch Nick up before going with the second-ranked person in the class. Nick just did not give a shit about trying to outplay Asano in that one. 'But why that wager?' you might ask for whatever fucking reason. And I'd say, 'Think about what Nick's assuming.'

Also, Nick's sleepy morning dialogue returns! He's getting better? This time he's just dropping entire words in his sentences, no big deal. The main reason Ritsu's super chill about him just showing back up is because she was keeping tabs on him thanks to his phone being still linked to her.

(oh yeah this is the same general rules as the first Book in terms of spoilers and shit so yeah)

Thanks for reading, people, and I hope you all enjoyed.

(also if any of the author notes feels loopy or weird that's because i'm typing it up while totally exhausted from the stress of college. don't take four computer science classes in one semester, kids, friendly advice from knight)