Recently I began watching South Park. As you all know, when I get into a new fandom, I almost always create a new character or two, and South Park is no exception. I want you all to meet Kate Meyercheck—the Jersey-girl-turned-South-Park-sister.

Enough talk. Let's get to the story.

It all started with a phone call at the Cartmans.

"MOM! PHONE!" Eric Cartman yelled to his mother. Liane entered the room and picked up the phone. She checked the caller ID and saw it was her old friend Lisa Meyercheck.

"Hello, Lisa!" she said brightly, heading into the kitchen. "How are you?"

"Hello, Liane," Lisa replied, sounding depressed. "Not good, actually."

"Is it Mike? Is he still trying to catch you?"

"Yes. That's actually a big part of the reason I'm calling. It's Kate."

"What's wrong with Kate?"

"Living on the run like this isn't good for a little girl. She needs a steady home and I don't want Mike to find her."

"Oh?"

"Liane, I know I haven't talked to you in a while, but I need you to help me. Would you be willing to adopt my daughter?"

"Well, I would like my Eric to have a sister… and Kate is such a little darling! Yes, I'm willing to take her!"

"I'll send you the paperwork. Thank you, Liane! This will be good for her." Lisa sounded bittersweet—like she was on the verge of tears but happy at the same time.

"All right. Bye, Lisa!"

Liane hung up and poked her head into the living room. Cartman was sitting on the couch, shoving Cheesy Poofs into his mouth as he stared at the TV. She crossed the room and stood next to the couch.

"Eric?" she asked gently. "Could you turn off the TV? I have something to tell you."

Cartman rolled his eyes but did as she asked.

"What, Mom?" he asked brattily.

"Eric, a friend of mine just asked me to do something for her, and I agreed to do it."

"I don't see why this fucking concerns me."

"Eric… she asked me to adopt her daughter."

Cartman dropped the bag of Cheesy Poofs and stared at his mom.

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!" he yelled. "YOU AGREED TO ADOPT A KID?!"

"Now, listen, Eric. I've met her before, and she's a sweet little girl. It'll be good for you to have a little sister."

"I DON'T FUCKING WANT A LITTLE SISTER, MOM!"

"Well, I'm sorry, Eric, but I already agreed to take her in, so you'll just have to deal with it for now, okay?"

Cartman glared at the carpet.

"It's such bullshit!" Cartman complained to his friends. "She just decides to adopt a kid, without asking me!"

"So you're getting a little sister," Kyle said. "So what? Having a younger sibling isn't that bad."

"You don't get it, Kyle! Having a sister will be the worst! Am I right, Stan?"

"If she's anything like Shelly, I'll pray for your soul," Stan joked. "But seriously, it might not be that bad. How old is she?"

"A few months younger than me."

"Dude, that means she'll be in our class and we'll get to meet her," Kyle stated.

"(When's she coming?)" Kenny asked, his voice muffled as usual.

"In a week."

Kate stared blankly out the window of the cab. She still felt a little shell-shocked and numb from her mother giving her up. Why had it happened? And why was her mother sending her to a quiet little mountain town?

The cab passed a sign that said simply SOUTH PARK. She was in her new home.

"Well, ain't this a nice place?" the driver commented. "You ever been here before?"

"No," she sighed.

"Listen, kid. My job is just to drop you off. Your mom already paid me, so don't worry about that, okay?"

"Okay."

He drove through a pretty nice downtown area, with places like a Photo Dojo, Unplanned Parenthood, and Tom's Rhinoplasty. Kate squirmed a little. This really was a quiet little mountain town.

Eventually, they came to a street with houses on either side. Little kids, too young for kindergarten, were outside playing, as far as Kate could see. The cab slowed to a crawl to avoid hitting anybody and eventually stopped in front of a bright green house.

"All right, kid," the driver declared. "This is your stop. Enjoy your new life."

Kate grabbed her backpack and suitcase and got out of the car. Once she'd closed the door, the driver pulled a three-point turn and sped off in the direction he'd come from. She took a deep breath and walked up to the door, ringing the doorbell. Footsteps approached the door before it opened to reveal a woman Kate recognized as Liane Cartman.

"Welcome, Kate!" Liane said brightly. "This is your new home!"

Kate peered around. It was a nice house, as far as she could tell. Liane seemed sweet, too, like Lisa had been.

"Let me show you to your new room," Liane continued. "Then you can unpack and explore the house. Eric will be home in an hour and you can meet him."

Kate bit her lip and followed Liane upstairs. Liane opened a door to the left.

"This is your room. We can decorate it however you want once you get settled."

The little girl entered the room. It had obviously been a guest room beforehand, given the neutral walls and bedding. She gave Liane a genuine smile as the woman headed back downstairs.

Kate took a look in the mirror on the wall. She had barely had enough time to do her hair that morning before she went to the airport, so her dark brown hair was a bit of a mess. As usual, she felt pleased at the sight of her fair skin and freckles that dotted her face across her nose and cheeks. It set her apart from the people she'd grown up with in Jersey before she and her mom had taken off. No tans for her, just fair skin and freckles.

Shaking herself from her thoughts, Kate set to work unpacking. She put her clothes in the dresser and closet before setting out her more… personal items. A photo album, her computer, her tablet, her favorite books… and a handgun. She put that one in the locking jewelry box she'd brought. Kate took a deep breath before setting that in the top drawer of the vanity and shutting the drawer.

Kate laid on her new bed, staring at the ceiling. She'd explored the house as much as she could, save for the basement. That had an electronic lock on it for some reason. Eric had yet to show up, but Kate felt nervous about meeting him. She'd never had a brother before, and he hadn't had a sister. According to Liane, Eric hadn't wanted the adoption to happen, but she'd gone through with it anyway.

The sound of the front door slamming and a loud voice made her jump.

"MOM! I'M HOME!"

Kate slid off the bed and opened the door to see a fat boy in a red coat going to the room closest to the stairs. She guessed he was Eric, her new brother.

"Hi," she greeted him. He yelped and turned to face her.

"DON'T FUCKING DO THAT!" he snapped.

"Sorry!" she squeaked, a little scared.

"Anyway, you must be my new sister. What's your name?"

Jeez, was he bipolar? It was a complete flip in personality.

"Hello? I said, what's your name, dumbass?"

"Katherine, but everyone calls me Kate."

"Well, Kate, this is my house, so you just stay out of my way and we won't have any issues, okay?"

"Okay. So you're Eric?"

"Yeah, but most people call me 'Overlord of the Universe'. Or Cartman."

"I'll call you Cartman."

He huffed and went in his room, slamming the door shut behind him.

The next morning, Liane drove the two of them to South Park Elementary. Kate stood awkwardly behind her adoptive mother while Cartman ran for his class, eager to avoid his new sister rather than support her.

"You'll be in Mr. Garrison's class, m'kay?" Mr. Mackey told Kate. "Your brother's already there, but I'll show you the way, m'kay?"

"O-okay…" Kate replied.

"Have a good day, sweetie!" Liane called as she left the office.

Kate followed Mr. Mackey down the hall. She felt nervous. She'd been homeschooled on the road for so long that she'd forgotten what being in an actual school was like. Mr. Mackey seemed nice enough, if a little odd.

"Here we are," Mr. Mackey said, opening the door to the fourth-grade classroom. "Wait out here while I talk to Mr. Garrison, m'kay?"

Within a couple minutes, a man in green followed Mr. Mackey out of the room.

"Is this my new student?" he asked.

"Yes. This is Katherine Cartman."

"Cartman? As in she's related to Eric?"

"Adopted."

"Oh." The man gave Kate a look. "I'm Mr. Garrison. Come on in and we'll introduce you to the class. Just wait until I tell you, okay?"

"Okay." Kate stared at her shoes. Mr. Mackey headed back down the hall and Mr. Garrison went inside the classroom.

"All right, children. Let's take our seats," he declared. "We have a new student joining us today. Let's do our best to make her feel welcome. Come on in!"

The class looked at the door as it opened. In walked a girl with dark brown hair tied in a side ponytail. She was staring at the ground shyly.

"Go on and introduce yourself," Mr. Garrison urged.

"M-my name is Katherine C-Cartman, and I'm excited to be here," she said. "Please call me Kate, though."

"Well, Katherine, there's an open seat next to Wendy, so please sit there. Wendy, raise your hand so Kate can see you."

Wendy smiled and did as she was told. Kate sat next to her, feeling uncomfortable under the stares of her new classmates. Well, with Cartman, it was more of a glare, but you get the point.

Lunch wasn't great for Kate. She sat by herself, since most of the other tables were full and she didn't feel like intruding on someone else's group. Cartman had a triumphant look on his face as he looked at her all by herself.

"Your new sister seems sweet," Stan told Cartman.

"Please! I came home yesterday, and she scared the crap out of me!" he snorted.

"How?" Butters asked.

"She just snuck up behind me and said hi!"

"I think that's more of you being a coward, dumbass," Kyle retorted. "She's in a new place with new people she's never met before. She's not going to try to scare people yet."

"Aw, she's just shy!" Butters cooed. "I bet if we show her she's welcome here, she'll warm up to us in no time!"

"She's riding the bus home with us," Cartman snickered. "She'll sit by herself for today."

"(I'll sit with her,)" Kenny offered.

"Sorry, Kinney, but I don't want your poor-people germs infecting her."

"(Fuck you.)"

At recess, Kate sat under a tree by herself, again not wanting to annoy anybody. She was just staring at a book on her lap.

"Hi."

She looked up to see one of her brother's friends. The one in the green hat.

"Hi," she replied.

"I'm Kyle. I'm in your class."

"It's… nice to meet you."

"Mind if I sit with you for a sec?"

"Not at all."

He sat next to her and glanced at her book.

"What's it called?"

"What's what called?"

"Your book."

"Oh. It's called Bizenghast. It's mostly a lot of ghosts and awkward teenage stuff."

"Sounds weird."

…

"Why are you talking to me?"

"You looked like you needed a friend."

"Yeah. The only kid at this school I know is Cartman."

"What's it like having Fatass as a brother?"

"He's loud, rude, and he told me to stay out of his way."

"Sounds like being his friend."

"You seem nice, Kyle." She gave him a little smile.

"If you want, I can sit with you on the bus when we go home," he offered.

"I'd like that. Thanks, Kyle."

"GET A ROOM!" Cartman jeered from across the playground.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, FATASS!"

"DON'T CALL ME FAT, YOU FUCKING JEW!"

Kate giggled.

Living in South Park might not be so bad.

And first chapter's done.

Enjoy!

So long and thanks for all the fish!