As promised here is the last part of Gray… I've been known to start a lot of things and never finish any, so I'm happy to have seen this little idea to the end. Thanks so, so much to everyone who has supported this fic in any way, it really means a lot to me, and it's the reason why I even continued to write it. And for one last time, any reviews are much appreciated.

Deeks took his gun from the back of his pants and slowly walked towards Boyle. He stood looking down at the clearly drunk man. His mind again getting mixed with images of the past and he remembered the night he shot his father. Could he do it again?

He lifted his gun, cocked the hammer and…

-x-x-x-

The tension in the room had gotten to a new high. Every agent stared at the detective with their mouths slightly open, eyes wide, and minds moving faster than ever.

They had known Deeks for 7 years, and during that time, he had ended up saving all of their lives at one point or another. He was a good guy by nature, funny, honest and charismatic. Also, cheeky, irreverent and slightly annoying. But if asked to say one word to describe their friend they would always say good.

Still the story they were now hearing left room for other words…

-x-x-x-

He couldn't do it… He lowered his gun and pointed it at the ground.

He had come from a violent past, but he wasn't a violent man.

He had shot his father to save himself and his mother, but he wasn't a murderer.

He wanted to help Tiffany, but he wasn't willing to surrender his morals and darken his soul to do it.

At that point Boyle woke up and his eyes narrowed on the figure standing in front of him. It was too big to be Tiffany but still the alcohol running through his veins made it hard to confirm. He concentrated and recognized his partner… Martin Deeks. Everything made sense now, and it had to have been Deeks the one who turned internal affairs' radar into him. Maybe he was in on the plan and he was here to arrest him.

"You here for a second round?" Boyle sneered at the young cop.

Deeks took a long breath and kept staring at the poor excuse of a man who was laying on the floor in front of him.

"You always have something to say and today what? You only here to stare at me from up high? Always thinking you're better than me and having the nerve to try to turn my own police department against me? It is due time someone puts you in your place…" He launched himself at Deeks and both ended up in the ground. The force of the unexpected attack made Deeks' gun fly in the air, eventually landing under a chair, on the other side of the bed.

Both men were now struggling on the ground, but no one was definitely winning. Boyle because of the alcohol impairing his senses and Deeks by his own determination not to let the demons out and give in to the violence of his father. It was Boyle who eventually managed to gain the upper hand and he started hitting the detective over and over again in his abdomen and face.

Deeks closed his eyes, trying to think of a way to get out this situation without compromising himself, sacrificing Tiffany or forfeiting his own life. He opened his eyes when he heard the distinct sound of a gun being cocked and his blue eyes zeroed on the weapon that Boyle was now pointing at him.

For a short moment Deeks was not an adult, lawyer and cop, but a young boy and son scared out of his mind. He had come a long way and he wasn't ready to die now. There was so much more that he needed and wanted to do. So many more people to help. And dreams to achieve.

With the last bit of his strength, all the courage from his mother, and violence from his father, he pushed Boyle away from him and, taking advantage of the startled man, was able to take the gun from his hands.

He looked down again at his partner… Partner? Was that what a partner was supposed to be like? Sadly he didn't think he was destined to ever find out. The man was clearly disoriented by the combination of the alcohol, Deeks' gaining the upper hand and the slight collision with a table when Deeks had pushed him off his body.

The young cop started walking towards the door, stepping over Boyle and kneeling to pick his own gun before returning Boyle his own and eventually leaving this hellhole; determined to find someone willing to listen and end this once and for all.

As he walked back towards Boyle, his mind flashed back to various moments in his past…

His father beating on him and his mother, and eventually pointing a shotgun at both of them.

The young woman he had defended as a lawyer because she shot her step-father after he had killed her mother in front of her.

The body of a young boy that he encountered on one of his first calls as a cop, beaten to death by his own father, after various neighbor calls to the police had resulted in nothing.

The young girl currently waiting for him at his home, and who was nearly killed by this so-called cop after no one at his precinct had even considered the truthfulness of his claims.

And as he was about to drop Boyle's gun on top of him, his mind flashed forward to an unknown point in the future.

His own figure standing in front of a coffin, mourning the death of Tiffany, having been killed by his partner. Or maybe it would be Tiffany the one crying, and looking down at his dead body, again, at the hands of said partner.

Over and over again innocent people died because the system had failed them. The world was not perfect and he doubted it would ever be. Someone had to put a stop to it. Somehow things had to get better… And the cycle needed to end...

Deeks took in a deep breath, lifted Boyle's gun, cocked the hammer and shot the bastard near the heart.

The young cop's breath started coming in small gasps as the blood began spreading from the wound, coloring Boyle's shirt red and draining the life from his body, and he felt his own breath stop at the precise moment his former partner drew in his last. At that moment, for the first time in his life, he felt like his father, and wondered if maybe it was impossible to run away from the violence and memory of that past. But right now he didn't have time to focus on that…

As a cop, Deeks knew how crime scenes were processed, and as a lawyer, he knew all the ways to incriminate oneself and the only ways to successfully prosecute someone, so he took care of everything around him, making it look as if one of the hookers that Boyle used to beat had shot him with his own gun…

He placed his gun in the waistband of his jeans, stopped to look one more time at the mess of the room and the corpse of Francis Boyle, turned around, and walked out into the hall, closing the door behind him, feeling as if he wasn't alone anymore…

In reality from that day moving forward he wasn't able to be alone ever again. His actions that night gave birth to the demons that had started on his childhood but had never fully formed. His soul would forever be black and he would have to live in darkness, as the only one knowing what had happened and what he had done that night…

-x-x-x-

Deeks opened his eyes and looked at his teammates in front of him. He was expecting to find disgust, anger and disappointment on their faces; instead he was surprised by the expressions they exhibited.

Callen's showed understanding as if he, himself, had been there before. And given his past, he probably had…

Sam's showed admiration, knowing that it was easy to do the right thing when it came to arresting a criminal or helping a friend, but knowing that the system did failed and sometimes the world needed people willing to sacrifice themselves for the greater good. After all, Deeks had done what he should have a year ago, if he have had the courage to kill Tahir at his son's military academy, Michelle would be alive today, and he wouldn't be living with so many what ifs…

Kensi's showed only love for the man he was today, sadness for the boy he had been, and anger towards the world that had forced such a good man to make such hard decisions, as shooting his own father or killing his own partner.

"So… that's the story of how I got away with murder…" Now that the hardest part was done, Deeks humor had returned and he was back to relieving the tension with his smartass remarks.

Among the shock of everything that was said in the last hour, and not finding the situation even slightly funny, still all three agents had to laugh at that comment… it was probably just the need to unwind taking over.

It was Callen who eventually brought the conversation back to a serious tone, and before everyone got distracted he decided to ask the last question that was on his mind… "What happened with Tiffany? She must have known you kil… She must have known what happened with Boyle?" He decided to change his question at the end, not wanting to sound accusatory, and just wishing to understand the whole story.

Deeks stood up and started passing a little, he then took in a breath as if preparing himself to return to the painful memories and finally continued, "After that night she finally decided to turn her life around…"

-x-x-x-

The drive back to his apartment happened in a blur. He was surprised that he wasn't feeling angry or worried, not even sad or scared, just… numb. He really wasn't feeling much of anything and he just wanted for this day to come to an end.

Before going to his apartment he took a small detour to his favorite beach, luckily it was just 5 minutes away so he wouldn't take much time. Getting out of his car he put on a hoodie and decided to walk towards the ocean. The coldness of the water helped calm his thoughts but the feeling of numbness that had enveloped his body after he had pulled the trigger was still there… and it worried him. He thought he was a good man and one destined to be a cop because of his sensibility and ability to feel, but what if killing Boyle had taken that way?

What is a cop without the ability to feel empathy?

What is a lawyer without the ability to feel compassion?

And what is a man without the ability to relate, or even feel anything at all?

He didn't want to dwell on these things now, and he certainly didn't want to question his actions. It was already too late for that. He put on the hood of his sweatshirt and started to cry. He was past the point of caring if anyone saw him, because he was also past his breaking point.

When he pulled that trigger, the gun had not only released the bullet that killed Boyle, but also millions of shadows that would forever be a part of him. Still those nightmarish creatures were invisible to everyone but him, and he could still take reigns of his life, and make his days count for the better. Even if at the moment he felt as if he was drowning in a sea of darkness, the person he was deep down was not forfeited for the actions he had taken that day. And he was determined to spend every one of his days trying to make up for the sin committed on this night.

He arrived back at his apartment around 20 minutes after he first parked on the beach, surprising himself when he saw his hands were shaking as he tried to open the door. The first thing that he noticed as soon as he was inside the apartment was the lack of any light or sound, and for a moment he panicked, thinking he had taken too long and Tiffany had run away again. His breathing evened when he caught sight of the young girl sleeping on his couch.

He walked towards her and was surprised by how young she looked when she was sleeping, in a normal living room, and not behind a dumpster or on a dirty staircase. The sight of Tiffany peacefully sleeping is what finally allowed him to find peace within himself and with the knowledge that thanks to him the world was now rid of another bastard. And because of that many other young girls, like the one currently occupying his coach, would have the opportunity to live and reach their full potential. That thought was the last realization he needed and he was truly content in the knowledge that his actions had surely saved, at least, her life…

Thinking that Tiffany would probably wake up hungry, the young man went to the kitchen and started to cook her a quick meal. His efforts were rewarded a little while later when Tiffany gingerly walked into the kitchen.

"Hey… are you hungry?"

"What happened," this girl, even with her black aye and aching body, was still a fighter and she, as usual, was all business.

"It doesn't matter, it's over… Now, are you hungry? I made you some pasta." At first he had thought of making a simple sandwich, but pasta was the comfort food used by his mother after a particularly bad beating at the hands of his father so he decided to stick to tradition.

"How?"

"Tiffany, we don't need to talk about it, you don't have to worry about Boyle ever again. Sit down, I'll get a plate ready for you…"

"Did you kill him?" The coldness with which she asked the question would have surprised any other man, but not Marty Deeks, as he himself had already been introduced at that age, not only to the concept of death but to the action of pulling a trigger yourself. Still his heart hurt and he felt anger towards the monsters of the world that had stolen the innocence of young boys like he had been and young girls like Tiffany.

He thought about lying, but this girl was too smart for that, and he felt like she deserved the truth. He would have usually tried to protect the child and their innocence, but in the case of Tiffany there wasn't really anything to protect, and sadly at her young age, she had already seen a lot more than she should have or deserved.

"Yes…" his response came in quick and without looking at her directly in the eyes. Instead he busied himself pouring the sauce on the pasta and adding some cheese before serving a plate for him and one for Tiffany.

The girl took his response like the truth it was, and she understood the finality of the statement. She went to the fridge and grabbed a beer for him and a juice for her, setting them both on the table, along with some silverware and some napkins… This man had just saved her life, and she at least wanted to feel useful.

They ate in silence, each of them concentrating on their own food and not wanting to drag the other to their depressed mood and dark feelings, not knowing, or not wanting to acknowledge, that the other one was feeling the same, or maybe even worse.

After all pasta was consumed, including a second serving for the cop and a third for the girl, Deeks decided to address what would happen next.

"Look Tiffany… I won't give you all the details, but you have to know that what I did today is not okay, and it should never be the first choice… I…"

He was surprised when Tiffany interrupted, not sounding like the girl she was, but like the woman she shouldn't yet be. "Marty… you don't have to explain anything to me… There's nothing to justify… You saved my life and I will forever owe you for that… I don't think I will ever be really able to repay you… But at least I can promise to keep our secret for just… us." By the end of her sentence, there were tears in her eyes and the look on her face only showed the appreciation she felt for this man who without really knowing her had been willing to sacrifice everything to protect her.

Deeks took in a few deep breaths to gather his emotions and to fully comprehend what the girl had just said. "Thank you…"

Tiffany stood up from the chair and walked towards Marty, throwing her arms around him and hugging him tightly. The young man was first startled by her actions but quickly recovered and hugged her back, knowing that at that precise moment a bond stronger than most had just been forged in front of their eyes.

After they parted ways and Tiffany started to clean up the table, Deeks walked to his room and took a card and brochure. One he had been saving for a long time.

He called Tiffany to the living room and sat with her on the couch in which she had previously been sleeping on.

"Tiffany… you need to leave this life behind… I won't be able to always protect you… Today was Boyle but tomorrow it could be someone else… I…"

Again she interrupted, sounding even more sure and certain than he did, "I know, I already took that decision after I managed to run away from that hotel, and knowing what you did, and that he won't come after me, I want to use the life you gave me for something better…"

The feeling of pride starting in the young man's heart was like none other, and again, he knew he had taken the right choice, even if it would continue to haunt him for who knew how many more years.

"I'm happy to hear that… You're gonna stay here this weekend, and on Monday I will take you to a different shelter. That one… I know from personal experience not work… Here's the card of someone that works there, if you tell her you know Martin Brandel she will help and give you everything you need to get back on your feet… And here's a brochure of a technical college were you could take classes if you want… you know… to have a better… career. They even have classes to make up for high school if you didn't finish it so you can eventually take college level ones…" He wanted to keep saying more, to keep encouraging her and show her the light at the end of the tunnel, but he also didn't want to overwhelm her, and felt that was enough information for one night.

They eventually felt asleep together on the coach, Deeks like the older brother Tiffany never had to protect her, and Tiffany like the younger sister Deeks never had to keep him innocent. They spent the rest of the weekend together, not ever speaking about Boyle again, only about what each of them wanted to do with their lives. They researched some more about possible programs Tiffany could complete to get a better job and took the rest of the time to just watch some TV and enjoy a normal day.

When Monday came, Deeks drove her to the new shelter before going into work, knowing what the atmosphere in his district would probably be like and trying to prepare to face the questions and stick to the story he and Tiffany had agreed on the night before. When Tiffany got out of the car she promised to stay in the right path and to call him regularly, while Deeks promised that he would support her in whatever she needed as long as she never decided to return back to her previous life…

-x-x-x-

"That's how you ended up sending her money?" Kensi hated to ask the question, but she just needed to be sure.

"Yes, she went to the shelter and as promised never returned to the streets. She started studying and trying to build a life and name for herself, but with her record and personal and family past it was difficult so I helped her out…" Deeks sounded unsure, as if maybe he was questioning if all his actions in regards to Boyle and Tiffany had been the right ones. Ultimately, Tiffany and the money weren't the biggest of his problems, it was the fact he had murdered Boyle… "You guys saw Tiffany when you questioned her, she's doing better… and what I did that night, even if maybe not totally right, is what gave her that chance…" He wasn't totally sure if he was trying to convince them… or himself… And even with all the right words he had just said, and seeing the understanding in his friends' eyes he felt that he needed to add two more words… "I'm sorry…" He looked down and waited for them to say something.

The three agents looked at each other, silently asking who was going to say the first thing. It was Sam who eventually took charge and started to set him friend's mind straight. "Thanks for trusting us brother, I won't get into judging or thinking what I would have done… You were the only one who lived through it and you did what you saw as the only way of stopping Boyle… A decision that I wished I had also taken in the past…" The admission was unusual for Sam, but they all knew what he was referring to, and all their hearts collective hurt at the memory. Before anyone could comment on that last remark, Sam continued on his previous train of thought… "And ultimately, I know the Deeks you're today and I have seen first-hand all the things you do to make this world a better place… So I'm taking what you did back then as just another one of those sacrifices…"

At the word sacrifice both men flashed back to a dirty auto shop and all the sacrifices and loses that happened there. Those were the things that mattered, the ones that defined a person and determined what color his or her soul really was.

"Thanks Sam…" Deeks was feeling emotionally tired and wasn't able to respond with a lot more.

"I get it, man" Now it was time for Callen to add his opinion, as team leader he felt that he needed to say something. "I understand where you're coming from, I can't say I would have done the same thing, but that doesn't matter, because I can't guarantee I could have acted any better…"

There was silence in the room then, each man and woman lost in their own thoughts and imagining what would it feel to be put in such position. Neither of them could come up with a textbook approach, a foolproof response or a perfect solution. They all had been there before, not in that particular moment, but forced to make a tough decision without much time to think about it and none of them could fault their teammate for the way he had reacted.

"You already know how I feel baby… and I can show it to you later tonight" She said the last part with a wink, ignoring the grunts coming from the senior partners. Continuing in a more serious tone, "you were protecting Tiffany and every other girl that Boyle would have continued to beat up, because from what I know of the man, he wasn't going to stop… You saved her and she's doing better now, all thanks to you."

Deeks heart felt full from his team's support and he again wondered how he had gotten so lucky as to have these people in his life. "Thanks to all of you… I… I… have lived with that decision inside of me for a long time. I did what at the time I thought was the only solution, and every day after that I have continued to dedicate myself to bringing down bad guys and making sure the system doesn't continue to fail more innocent people… Maybe today I would have been able to come up with a better answer but… at the time that was the best I could do, and I have had to live with that for a long time… At least now, the knowledge is not only mine…"

"You don't have to justify yourself man, we all understand and we have your back…" It was Sam who started talking, but Callen who completed the thought, "…Against the bad guys as you like to call them, or Whiting, Bates, or anyone at LAPD, against Mosley or anyone at NCIS…" Now it was Kensi who decided to continue, "…We're a team, we know each other better than anyone, including our darkest secrets and fears… And when all is said and done we're the only ones who really have each other's backs, because we're the only ones who truly understand…"

On an uncharacteristic action, Sam stood up and hugged Deeks, Kensi then joined and Callen eventually followed. It lasted only 5 seconds and if asked later they would all deny it, but the previous hours have brought this family even closer together and they all felt the proximity was somehow needed.

The guys stayed for 20 more minutes, drinking some more beers and talking about anything other than Boyle, guns or the past. They decided to grab some brunch together on Saturday and then go together to help Sam work on the boat. As the previous time the subject was brought up the senior team member declined, not wanting to bother his teammates on their free day, but everyone still wanted to help. Tonight they had chased Deeks' demons away, and tomorrow they would do the same for Sam. And the day after, they would do it for any team member that needed the help. They were a family and they would always be ready to be the shield, armor or weapon for any of them who found themselves in need.

-x-x-x-

After the two senior agents left, the woman with the mismatched-eyes silently stood up and went to the blonde man, gathering him in her arms and kissing him passionately. They stayed that way for some time, holding each other, and both enjoying the proximity to the person that meant the most in each of their lives. They eventually left the couch, turn off the lights and went into their room.

The door was closed, leaving what was about to happen inside for only the knowledge and enjoyment of the young couple involved. Eventually, after some time of relieving their tension and stress in that especial way they both loved, both man and woman drifted into sleep. The last thought on both their minds was that together they could beat anything. And together no longer meant just the two of them, but now, officially, included their two senior teammates as well.

-x-x-x-

In the past seven years the blonde man had managed to find the balance, stability and structure he had been missing his whole life and that ultimately became his savior and safe haven. But still occasionally that perfect arrangement wavered and he started feeling unbalanced. There's nothing he hated more than losing control… Seeing his life spiral out of order while he could only watch as a spectator… It usually started as a mere discomfort, but then it became worst and he could see the threats breaking, the blocks moving and the building crashing. Then came the nights when he couldn't control his demons and he was enveloped in shadows… Nights in which he just grabbed some headphones and cried, the sound of the music providing his only comfort and escape from his own sobs. It never lasted the same amount of time, and it never ended in the same way; but, ultimately, deep down he knew the day would come and the light would shine again. But, on those moments where he lost control he could only see the darkness and the pieces of his life falling into an infinite void. Never knowing if he would return the same way, with all the pieces still intact or some primal part of him would be forever lost.

Those moments, like the past week had proved, still came for the detective, but had become less common with the addition of a permanent and infinite source of light into his life. That light came in the form of NCIS, and his team: Hetty, the motherly figure and his first savior… Owen, a man who came and went, but whom embodied loyalty until his last breath… Callen, a man who came from nothing, but like him, constantly rose from the ashes… Sam, whom became somewhat of the brother he never had, but had always needed… Eric, the only man who understood his connection and love for the ocean… Nell, forever the Velma to his Shaggy… And Kensi… Oh Kensi… The partner he loved more than life itself, the friend for whom he constantly fought to come back from the edge, and the girlfriend he wanted to spend the rest of whatever time he had left with.

It was not a secret that the young man never thought he needed saving, but more importantly, he never believed he deserved it in the first place. But life had an ironic way of working and sometimes the light came from the unlikeliest of sources. He had always described himself as an outsider, a lost human and a black soul. But these seven people made him belong, they drew a path for him, and added white and color to his world. Ultimately, no matter what he had done in the past or what he would do in the future, as long as he kept close to this group of people, they would forever keep the darkness at bay, they would keep helping him slay his demons and they would forever keep him a nice shade of Gray...

If you got to this point, THANK YOU! When I wrote Gray part 1, I wasn't really confident in my writing and doubted anyone would even like it, and I truly intended for it to be a one-shot and probably my only fic, but it somehow grew into a 5-part sort of backstory into my favorite detective. I love NCISLA, writing about it and reading feedback about said writing, so I plan to continue giving this a try and hoping for the best. Whatever happens next I'm glad I managed to complete this story and I really appreciate anyone that read until the end and showed me their support along the way.