Vacationing In Middle Earth
By: Jo-chan
***
If you're a Tolkien purist please don't read this. Not only will you hate it you might just start to convulse because I've changed so much. If this doesn't apply to you please read! This is just a silly little fic I started writing for my best friend Shawn. Its all about what would happen if she and I got sent to Middle-Earth. Read, enjoy, and please review.
***
Chapter One: Hiccups in the Closet
Jo slammed her government book on the table with an exasperated sigh and scowled. "I hate government AP."
"That's why I got out," Shawn said cheerfully from the couch..
"Shrivel up and die," Jo mumbled.
"What?"
"Do you have any pie?"
"Nope. Everything I need to know about government I learned from School House Rock." She proceeded to sing 'I'm Just a Bill on Capital Hill.'
Jo rolled her eyes. "Two AP tests on the same day and instead of studying I let you talk me into going to DCI for three days." She shoved the government book aside and frowned at her biology text. "Quiz me on biology."
"Okies. Where do babies come from?"
"I hope you choke."
"Uh?"
"Could you get me a coke?"
"Can't. Hafta beat the Orcs."
"Are you still playing that game?" Jo got up and walked over to the couch Shawn was sprawled across.
"Yer the one whose been listening to the soundtrack for three days straight."
"Helps me study," Jo mumbled, watching the TV. "How long have you been playing?"
"Fifteen hours," Shawn answered proudly.
"And your mom doesn't worry about you?"
"Nah. Just asks me if I want something to eat every now and then."
"Maybe you should quit for now. We have to leave pretty early tomorrow. The buses leave at eight," Jo said walking over to the table and gathering her books. "You did pack, right?"
"Yeah," Shawn mumbled, gazing mournfully at the PS2 before turning it off. "The bags are in my room."
"Let's make sure we have everything and then crash. We need to get some sleep."
"Yes mother."
"Don't call me that! My brothers call me that."
Both girls entered Shawn's room and were immediantly attacked by a flying ball of orange fur.
"Go outside Diana! Let's go outside!" Shawn shouted and closed the door behind the excited dog. "Look. There's my bag and its all packed."
"Couldn't fit the PS2 in?" Jo teased. She crouched and started rummaging through the bag. "There's six bags of peanut butter M&Ms in here. We're only going up there for three days."
"Three days requires all of the Lord of the Rings books?" Shawn quipped, pulling the books out of Jo's bag. "And both the soundtracks? Isn't this my extended addition DVD?"
"I haven't finished it," Jo defended. She too the books, Cds, and DVDs, and put them aside lovingly.
"You've had it for two months."
"Haven't found time to watch them. I've been studying really hard." Jo patted the DVD box softly.
"I hope you don't sleep with that."
"Who told you!? I mean, yeah right." Jo chuckled nervously. "Like anyone's that crazy." She chuckled again and started digging through her bag.
"Yer a freak and I can't find my Riot."
"It's in the other bag. Over by the closet."
Shawn went to the bag and started to unzip it. Something in the closet made her stop. It sounded like....
A hiccup?
"Where's Diana-butt?" she asked Jo.
"Outside. How come?"
"Thought I heard something in the closet."
"Its probably those ants."
"It sounded like a hiccup."
"A hiccup? You've been playing video games for way too long."
"I'm serious. There it is again!"
Jo, carrying her bags, walked over to the closet and pushed her ear against the door. "Dude, I don't hear."
HICCUP!
"Crap!" Jo shouted and jumped away from the door. "There's something in there!"
"I told you! I told you!"
"W-what do we do?"
"Open it?"
"Something is hiccuping in your closet and you want to open the door?" Jo asked.
"Gotta find out what it is," Shawn answered.
"Or we could run, screaming, to your mom like small children."
"But that implies running. It's easier to just open the door."
"But what if what's in there wants to eat us?"
"We've got food. I'm gonna open it." Shawn put her hand on the doorknob.
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"I don't wanna get eaten!"
"You won't!"
Shawn yanked the door open.
"Uh..."
"Exactly what I was thinking." Jo turned on the closet light and shook her head. "M-maybe it was one of the dogs or your mom or something." She laughed. "Like something would actually be hiccuping in your closet." She turned to look at Shawn, smiling. "Pretty stupid, huh?"
HICCUP!
Author's notes:
1. AP stands for Advanced Placement. Its a college level class that you take during high school. There's a big test at the end of the year and if you score high enough you can get college credit for that course. You can always tell when the tests are coming up cause AP students have the look of doom on their faces.
2. DCI stands for Drum Core International. Its a competition for marching bands. Yes I am a band nerd. ^__^ Its allot of fun if you like that kind of thing. It doesn't usually last for three days but I figured I was all ready butchering a piece of literary genius so it really didn't matter.
3. Diana is Shawn's dog. She's a welsh corgi and if you've ever been around one you understand what I mean about a flying ball of fur.
4. The Riot is an MP3 player. It likes to run away and show up later.
5. Shawn's room is infested by ants. They like to attack hapless victims late at night. I'm pretty sure they have connections with the mob.
I think that's all of it. Someone tell me if I left something out.
By: Jo-chan
***
If you're a Tolkien purist please don't read this. Not only will you hate it you might just start to convulse because I've changed so much. If this doesn't apply to you please read! This is just a silly little fic I started writing for my best friend Shawn. Its all about what would happen if she and I got sent to Middle-Earth. Read, enjoy, and please review.
***
Chapter One: Hiccups in the Closet
Jo slammed her government book on the table with an exasperated sigh and scowled. "I hate government AP."
"That's why I got out," Shawn said cheerfully from the couch..
"Shrivel up and die," Jo mumbled.
"What?"
"Do you have any pie?"
"Nope. Everything I need to know about government I learned from School House Rock." She proceeded to sing 'I'm Just a Bill on Capital Hill.'
Jo rolled her eyes. "Two AP tests on the same day and instead of studying I let you talk me into going to DCI for three days." She shoved the government book aside and frowned at her biology text. "Quiz me on biology."
"Okies. Where do babies come from?"
"I hope you choke."
"Uh?"
"Could you get me a coke?"
"Can't. Hafta beat the Orcs."
"Are you still playing that game?" Jo got up and walked over to the couch Shawn was sprawled across.
"Yer the one whose been listening to the soundtrack for three days straight."
"Helps me study," Jo mumbled, watching the TV. "How long have you been playing?"
"Fifteen hours," Shawn answered proudly.
"And your mom doesn't worry about you?"
"Nah. Just asks me if I want something to eat every now and then."
"Maybe you should quit for now. We have to leave pretty early tomorrow. The buses leave at eight," Jo said walking over to the table and gathering her books. "You did pack, right?"
"Yeah," Shawn mumbled, gazing mournfully at the PS2 before turning it off. "The bags are in my room."
"Let's make sure we have everything and then crash. We need to get some sleep."
"Yes mother."
"Don't call me that! My brothers call me that."
Both girls entered Shawn's room and were immediantly attacked by a flying ball of orange fur.
"Go outside Diana! Let's go outside!" Shawn shouted and closed the door behind the excited dog. "Look. There's my bag and its all packed."
"Couldn't fit the PS2 in?" Jo teased. She crouched and started rummaging through the bag. "There's six bags of peanut butter M&Ms in here. We're only going up there for three days."
"Three days requires all of the Lord of the Rings books?" Shawn quipped, pulling the books out of Jo's bag. "And both the soundtracks? Isn't this my extended addition DVD?"
"I haven't finished it," Jo defended. She too the books, Cds, and DVDs, and put them aside lovingly.
"You've had it for two months."
"Haven't found time to watch them. I've been studying really hard." Jo patted the DVD box softly.
"I hope you don't sleep with that."
"Who told you!? I mean, yeah right." Jo chuckled nervously. "Like anyone's that crazy." She chuckled again and started digging through her bag.
"Yer a freak and I can't find my Riot."
"It's in the other bag. Over by the closet."
Shawn went to the bag and started to unzip it. Something in the closet made her stop. It sounded like....
A hiccup?
"Where's Diana-butt?" she asked Jo.
"Outside. How come?"
"Thought I heard something in the closet."
"Its probably those ants."
"It sounded like a hiccup."
"A hiccup? You've been playing video games for way too long."
"I'm serious. There it is again!"
Jo, carrying her bags, walked over to the closet and pushed her ear against the door. "Dude, I don't hear."
HICCUP!
"Crap!" Jo shouted and jumped away from the door. "There's something in there!"
"I told you! I told you!"
"W-what do we do?"
"Open it?"
"Something is hiccuping in your closet and you want to open the door?" Jo asked.
"Gotta find out what it is," Shawn answered.
"Or we could run, screaming, to your mom like small children."
"But that implies running. It's easier to just open the door."
"But what if what's in there wants to eat us?"
"We've got food. I'm gonna open it." Shawn put her hand on the doorknob.
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"I don't wanna get eaten!"
"You won't!"
Shawn yanked the door open.
"Uh..."
"Exactly what I was thinking." Jo turned on the closet light and shook her head. "M-maybe it was one of the dogs or your mom or something." She laughed. "Like something would actually be hiccuping in your closet." She turned to look at Shawn, smiling. "Pretty stupid, huh?"
HICCUP!
Author's notes:
1. AP stands for Advanced Placement. Its a college level class that you take during high school. There's a big test at the end of the year and if you score high enough you can get college credit for that course. You can always tell when the tests are coming up cause AP students have the look of doom on their faces.
2. DCI stands for Drum Core International. Its a competition for marching bands. Yes I am a band nerd. ^__^ Its allot of fun if you like that kind of thing. It doesn't usually last for three days but I figured I was all ready butchering a piece of literary genius so it really didn't matter.
3. Diana is Shawn's dog. She's a welsh corgi and if you've ever been around one you understand what I mean about a flying ball of fur.
4. The Riot is an MP3 player. It likes to run away and show up later.
5. Shawn's room is infested by ants. They like to attack hapless victims late at night. I'm pretty sure they have connections with the mob.
I think that's all of it. Someone tell me if I left something out.