Prologue

"Your babysitter will be here in five!" Ichigo's dad called from downstairs. "Be on your best behaviour—you're representing the Kurosaki household! No drugs, alcoho—"

Ichigo slammed open the door to his room. "Cut it, Goat-Chin!"

"No drugs! No alcohol! No stripp—"

"What the hell, you old man?! I already told you! I'm fifteen. I don't need a damn babysitter!"

He got a hearty laugh in response. "Just in case," his dad said with a smirk and ducked through the front door. A second later Yuzu followed through, giving Ichigo an excited smile and wave before turning away.

A tight grimace tugged at Ichigo's brow as he massaged his temples. Such a pain his dad was at times. Ichigo had been expecting a peaceful week to himself while Yuzu and Karin were off on their school camp along with Goat-Chin while he was on semester break. But no. His secret stash of Hentai Manga had been found when they were packing and cleaning out the cupboards. The memory of the incident and discussion after was still burned into his cheeks.

Though worst of all, in a moment of typical Isshin-like deviousness, he had decided to hire a babysitter for the week, reasoning that Ichigo needed the supervision. As if. Ichigo was the most mature of the family next to Karin—so what if he had normal hormonal urges every now and then.

So stupid. So lame.

He sighed and exited his room, lightly jogging down the stairs. The third step creaked. He eyed a crack in the wood and made a note to fix that sometime.

He looked out the door. The sun was still setting. But no babysitter or any humans or ghosts in sight. He was probably coming by car.

A bloody babysitter. The thought still irked him to hell. He didn't need a stranger watching his every move for an entire week. He didn't need to be treated like a baby… Not since his mother died… He'd been more of an adult than a child ever since. Seeing her lifeless, bloodied form lay on the concrete like that had aged his soul at least a decade. He was no child.

Groaning, Ichigo sat on the bottom step and clawed at its coat of dust. He stared out the door, glaring, waiting, expecting some old grouch to appear any minute. Gods, that was the last thing he needed. Some old guy—a real old guy unlike Goat-Chin—stinking up the place. Why couldn't he'd just been left alone? Left alone with his magazines. Left alone to finally get over his mother. She wouldn't have wanted to see him in such a sad state.

Perhaps thinking about his magazines and his mother at the same time wasn't needed either. Boy was he fucked in the head. Being able to see ghosts only proved it to him. No one believed him too.

As the street darkened, he mentally recited guitar tabs till his mind cleared. Sweet jazz played in his mind's ear. He'd gotten real good at it too. Chad had gotten him into guitar to help him cope. It worked, and it worked now even without physically playing.

Though he just couldn't push those damned magazines out for good. They'd gotten him into this mess. Those slender, beautiful 2D goddesses were forever burned into his eye sockets. He breathed and palmed his eyes hard. It was no use. Now that he'd thought about it, the pictures would pop out from the depths of his mind every thirty seconds. And it'd been weeks since he last jerked off. Suddenly his jeans were tight around his crotch.

"Hello, I'm Lisa Yadomaru, your babysitter," a smooth feminine voice dryly said. "You're Ichigo Kurosaki?"

He let his hands drop as his head jolted up. Against the mauve sky stood a stunning young woman probably only a few years older than himself. She was slim, her features sharp but soft on her light skin, adorned by her braided jet-black hair. She wore a cute sailor top and miniskirt he'd only ever seen in his magazines. Oh, that outfit made him harder than ever. And from his angle, he could see her inner-thighs and a tiny peek of her lacy panties. His jaw sagged as saliva pooled.

He jumped to his feet and bowed from the waist. "I'm Ichigo Kurosaki! Nice to meet you!" He offered a hand stiffly. Too stiff.

She leaned back an inch or two.

Way too stiff. Damn hormones.

After a few seconds she shook his hand. "You too…" she said in a clipped tone.

He swallowed, forcing himself to look into those turquoise eyes and not her outfit. She had quite the pair.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes," he answered too quickly. His chest thumped like mad.

She frowned, then looked him up and down. Her eyes hitched on his way too obvious boner. Not good. A hammer of dread hit him in the neck. Would she slap him? Would she call Goat-Chin this moment and tell him how much of a sicko his son was? Would she just leave? All the horrid possibilities rattled in his head as his erection wouldn't fade.

A look of understanding emerged on her face. She smirked.

He stopped breathing.

"So what are we doing tonight?" She kept smirking.

"I…" He took a breath. "I was going to read a bit…" Read his Hentai magazines, he really meant. "And play my guitar." He looked down, blushing, only to look at her slender legs again. His jeans bulged even more.

"Oh you play?" Her tone was playful.

"Yeah."

"Then play for me. Let's see what you've got."

"Alright," he almost squeaked and turned to ascend the stairs. "It's up in my room. Come." His body was in a frenzy. Hearing the door shut and click, he raced up the stairs and made sure his magazines were well hidden.

"This is turning out to be not as boring as I thought," he heard Lisa say, still on the stairs. Her steps were near silent.

Ichigo palmed his knees, heaving, as he took in what just happened. First, this sailor-outfit wearing goddess was his babysitter for an entire week! Second, she saw his bulging erection and didn't even mention it. This would be the best week of his entire life so far.

Goat-chin was the best dad in all of Japan.

A/N

Got this idea while I was writing my other fic, which will be updated soonish. What do you think?