New Sakura and the Akatsuki randomness! I don't know what possessed me to write this but I'm just going to roll with it. I will be updating this story randomly. If you have ideas that you would like to add for Truths and Dares, I'd be more than happy to add them. This story is going to strictly be a side project for fun. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Anyway!

I do not own Naruto or its characters, just the plot to this...thing?

If you enjoyed, please leave a review, favorite, and follow!

S Lyubov'yu,

Casper!

Sakura was going to kill Leader, she silently swore that she would not die before her new mission was complete. She knew that Leader was a sadistic bastard, but this was totally ridiculous. How he could even think that this was a good idea was beyond her. None of the other members of the Akatsuki could figure out what the point of all this was either. They were all just as stumped as she was.

Fucking 'Family' Game Night. Why the hell their Leader thought this was something that they needed to do was beyond all of them. As far as they were concerned, their team dynamic was as good as it was going to get when it came to missing-nins and S-Class evil organizations. They managed not to kill each other when they sparred and went on missions. As far as they were concerned, that was good enough team dynamic. But they supposed it could be worse, after all, he could have them sitting around a fire singing fucking songs and make them talk about their feelings.

So, now here they all were, sitting around a large oak table in the living room of the main base. It was rare that all of the members were in the same building all at once and they all knew that the only reason they were all there was by Leader's orders. One thing that they didn't understand was why he and Konan were not required to attend the little Game Nights. Zetsu had been excused from the dreaded games as well. Some of the members were relieved, while it pissed other members off to no end.

Sakura was one such person that was pissed about the arrangement. Not that she didn't get along with her fellow members, it was quite the opposite actually. She got along quite well with all of her comrades. No, it was the fact that every time she was left alone with the group of males one of them would subtly drop hints that she needed to hurry up and get pregnant so they could have a baby to spoil; namely Itachi and Sasori. The two males were so damn baby obsessed that they had gone so far as to try to lace her food and drinks with aphrodisiacs in order to make her easier to seduce. Not that it ever worked, but that didn't stop them from trying. The last time they had tried to drug her, she had ended up using Kisame's body as a beating stick and smacked them around a little with their blue-skinned comrade.

"So, what fucking game are we stuck playing this time around?", Hidan whined childishly, the last thing he wanted to be doing at that moment in time was playing some pointless game with his comrades. He already trusted them enough not to attempt to kill him, what more did Leader want from him?!

"I've got the game card right here and I have a feeling we're all going to prefer being sucked into Weasel Boy's fucking Tsukuyomi before this night is over", Sakura sighed, waving the small flash card in her hand around for every one to see.

"I am not a weasel.", Itachi sniffed.

"Shut up, Weasel-Chan.", Kisame muttered, shaking his head slowly at his partner.

"Read the damn card, yeah. I want to get this shit over with.", Deidara complained.

Sakura looked around at her comrades, smirking at their looks of impatience.

"Just spit it out already, this is wasting my time, I could be out in the field collecting bounties right now.", Kakazu snapped.

"Fine, fine, no need to get your panties in a bunch. The game of the night is...", Sakura trailed off for suspense. She knew that the sentiment was indeed not appreciated.

"Truth or Dare."

"Fuck."

"Shit."

"Kill me now, yeah."

"Touch my knitting needles and die."

"Money..."

"Shut the fuck up, Mr. Krabs."

"Will you all just shut the fuck up so we can get this over with?!", Sakura snapped.

All eyes turned to the small, pink haired medic, eyeing her warily. All of them knew that she was planning to get them all back for something during the game.

"I'm going to need as much sake as humanly possible to play this game.", Kisame announced before standing up and heading to the kitchen to pilfer every bottle of alcohol that he could find. He returned moments later with a mountain of bottles stacked in his arms. After settling himself on the ground once more, he handed out various bottles of booze to his comrades before gesturing for them to start the game. It was going to be a long night.

"Since we're different from regular people, we need to set some ground rules, yeah. Sakura, you're the medic, set up some ground rules.", Deidara pointed out, turning his head to regard to pinkette next to him.

"Rules are as follows. If you are unable to complete the dare or truth given to you, you must shed a piece of clothing of the person who dared you's choice. Hidan, you can't dare people to be your sacrifice, no daring people to die. No daring people to get me pregnant, I'll rip your dick off. Don't give me that face, Itachi. If you pass out due to alcohol consumption, nobody is responsible for what happens to you. And last but not least, no daring people to cause themselves or anybody else bodily harm unless it is completely justified. All questions asked when picking Truth are fair game. Good luck, gents.", Sakura explained before grabbing the empty bottle next to her leg and setting it on the table.

"I'll go first, yeah.", Deidara sighed before spinning the bottle, when the bottle landed on Hidan, he couldn't help but smirk. "Truth or Dare, Zombie Bro?"

"Dare, bitch."

"I dare you to...hug Kakazu and tell him he's the best partner you've ever fucking had, yeah.", the blond snickered.

Hidan shot the blond the finger before attacking his partner in an exaggerated full-bodied hug. "Oh, Kakazu, you're the best partner a man could ask for!"

"That was fucking creepy, yeah.", Deidara shuddered.

The rest of the group couldn't help but agree. Hidan just shrugged and spun the bottle, smirking when it landed on Sakura.

"Truth or Dare, Doc?"

"Truth."

"Who is the hottest male in the room?", he smirked, noticing that every male in the room lean forward as they waited for her answer.

"Hottest dude? Seriously? Are you twelve. It's a tie between you and Deidara.", Sakura answered with a shrug.

Needless to say, Deidara and Hidan's manly pride swelled at her admission. Sakura just shook her head and spun the bottle, giggling evilly when it landed on the bane of her existence.

"Truth or Dare, Weasel Boy?"

"Truth"

"If you could choose any male in the room to knock me up, who would it be and why?", she asked, sue her. She was curious, dammit!

"I would say Sasori, Deidara, or myself. Myself because our children would be adorable and I've always wanted a child of my own. Plus, it would allow me to start rebuilding my clan. Sasori because your children would be downright adorable and would be masters at Puppetry and Medical Jutsu. Deidara because green eyed blond haired babies would be absolutely swoon-worthy. The bloodline limit the child would have would also be a perk.", the raven haired man explained, his normally emotionless eyes glinting with an unnamed emotion.

Quite frankly, it disturbed everybody to no end. Sakura''s face was an unhealthy shade of red from her embarrassment. Some questions were definitely better left unasked. This had been one of them. Her and her big fucking mouth.

Itachi just shrugged before spinning the bottle, revealing no emotion as it landed on his unlucky partner.

"Truth or Dare, Kisame?", he asked calmly, acting as if he had not just let loose the volley of baby related information mere moments ago.

"Uh...Truth.", his partner stammered. There was no way in hell he was going to do any of the sadistic dares that he knew his usually calm partner was capable of conjuring up. Nope. No way in hell was he taking the chance. He didn't feel like dying at the moment.

"Did you eat the rest of my dango stash and if it wasn't you, who did?"

"SAKURA DID IT!", the normally composed blue-skinned male shrilled.

"KISAME YOU FUCKING TRAITOR!"

"I DON'T FEEL LIKE DYING TODAY, WOMAN!"

"Sakura...prepare to die when this is all over."

"Bring it, Weasel Bitch."

"How about we just spin the bottle, yeah?", Deidara whimpered from his spot next to Sakura.

Kisame nodded before spinning the bottle.

"Deidara, Truth or Dare?"

"Dare, yeah."

"I dare you to slam down this entire bottle of vodka in one sitting.", the shark smirked, handing the blond a bottle of clear alcohol. He couldn't help but snicker when the poor blond visibly paled at his challenge.

The blond grabbed the bottle around its neck before twisting off the cap. He took a deep breath before raising the bottle to his lips, there was no turning back. He could do this. Oh, who was he kidding. His tolerance for alcohol sucked. He was so royally fucked. In the ass. He just hopped that when he died of alcohol poisoning, he would be remembered for his artistic genius. The moment the first mouthful of liquid landed on his tongue, he fought the urge to gag. Kisame just had to give him the potent shit. He chugged down the vodka with as much vigor he could muster. He could hear the small chants of "chug chug chug!" from his comrades and slammed the bottle on the table once it was drained of its contents. He left his stomach lurch and fought with every ounce of his being to keep the alcohol in his stomach. It had tasted terrible going down, he had no intentions of tasting it twice.

"Damn, Blondie."

"Throw up on me and die, Dei.", Sakura threatened.

"Didn't think the kid had it in him."

"Acceptable."

"A most artistic performance."

"What a waste of money."

Deidara just shook his head and chuckled when it landed on Kakazu.

"Truth or Dare, Stitches?"

"Dare."

"I dare you to set the entire contents of your wallet on fire.", the bomber smirked, handing the stitched ninja a lighter. He giggled drunkenly when he saw the man's face pale at the thought of burning his hard earned money.

"I won't fucking do it.", Kakazu spat.

"Then lose the shirt, Stitches.", Deidara snickered, flailing slightly when the thick material of Kakazu's shirt made contact with his head. He tore the shirt off his head with shudder and threw it behind him.

Kakazu rolled his eyes before spinning the bottle, when it landed on Sasori, he turned towards the Puppet Master.

"Truth or Dare?", he grumbled.

"Dare.", the Puppet Master replied calmly.

"I dare you to make out with Itachi for no less than two minutes. And make it believable.", the stitched ninja smirked beneath his mask.

Itachi and Sasori both blushed before turning towards each other, squaring each other up.

Sakura held a hand to her nose, willing herself not to get a nose bleed.

Kisame cringed at the thought of his stoic partner doing anything remotely sexual, especially to another man.

Deidara just buried his face in Sakura's shoulder, refusing to bare witness to the atrocity that was about to go down in the living room.

Sasori raised himself from his position on the floor and made his way calmly over to the raven haired Uchiha. He looked his partner in Baby Love in the eye before depositing himself into Itachi's lap. When he received a small nod from the male, he leaned in and sealed his lips over Itachi's.

I still have no idea why I decided that this needed to be written. But it took up a mind of its own. This started as something completely different and just kind of became...this. I don't have any words to describe it, but fuck it. It was fun to write. As I stated at the top, I will be updating this when the inspiration strikes. If you have any ideas that you would like to be included, feel free to post a review with your suggestion.

Baby Crazy Sasori and Itachi are BACK BABY! If you have read any of my other stories, I'm sure you are familiar with them lmao.

Itachi's knitting needles are legendary!

Anyway...if you enjoyed, please leave a review, favorite, and follow!

Until Next Time!