Written because I'm dying from Regal Believer feels after 7x02 but starts with the goodbye scene in 7x01
This is unbeta'd and I haven't written anything in so long I hope it's ok. Enjoy
Don't own characters etc etc
This was the goodbye she had been dreading. The day her little prince would leave to explore a world of his own. She smiled as he walked down the stairs, his backpack slung over his shoulder. Pulling him into a tight hug she kissed him fiercely. Willing it to be enough, knowing it wouldn't.
Henry smiled. He knew how hard it was for his mom to be doing this, to say goodbye and part of him felt guilty. Wondered if he was just the latest in a line of people his mother had loved to leave. He knew it wasn't forever. "I ,love you mom. Always and Forever."
That almost broke her. Almost but not quite.
Regina watched the portal close and released a breath she didn't know she was holding. He was gone. Her little boy was discovering his own story. She knew this day would come. She just never imagined quite how hard it would be.
She notices his trainers haphazardly strewn across the porch, and she goes to remind him to move them before remembering. That night she sets two places at the table, and finds herself holding back tears as she removes one. She's only just got used to setting it for two instead of 4 since Robin and Roland left. At that thought she can't stop the tears. She had a family. A happy beginning. A new fucking chapter and within a year it's gone. Her future is uncertain, unknown. The only thing she truly knows is she's alone..again.
That night she sleeps in his room, clutching his pillow. She would learn to live without. She always did.
/
Life goes on. It does because it has to. She was still the Mayor, and Storybrooke despite it's sudden influx of happy beginnings still needed to run. Being at the Office helped, she could run the town meetings, she could deal with people complaining about local taxes. She was less good at the emotional side of things, dealing with loss.
After a week of moping, counting the hours between unprompted tears she made an appointment with Archie. He was chipper in the way that Archie is, and the way she had once found irritating but it helped to cry. To scream. To talk to someone. About everything. She didn't really have that anymore.
The Charmings tried to help, but well they were the Charmings, they had their dog, two kids- Emma was a child 90% of the time, the farmhouse and the white picket fence. Yes they missed Henry, Henry was loved by everyone but they dealt with it in their overly optimistic way.
Emma was taking it harder than she let on, it was evident in the slightly bloodshot eyes and the drained look on her face when she thought no one was looking. She'd turned up one night on the doorstep, a shy smile on her face, crying. Regina had opened the door wordlessly and they'd gone to her study. Regina bought out the cider before they both decided they needed something stronger. They didn't say much, there wasn't really much they could say- not that would make it better anyway. In that moment they just needed the strength they found from each other. Two mother's bonded by the love for their son. The similarities between that night and the one that had occured nearly 6 years ago was not lost on either of them. How far they'd come.
Zelena came around more and Regina appreciated it more than she ever said. Zelena always knew what to say, not in the hope speech kind of way, but in the life is shit, it hurts but you gotta laugh about it or you'll cry kind of way. She also knew what it was like to be lonely. To have no one and to feel like you never would. Plus she was always up for a drink.
That first Christmas was a bitch. She would see things in the store, the latest x box game, a new comic and think of him. The lights went up over town and the christmas songs came blaring out. Regina hated it. She couldn't celebrate. She hadn't celebrated Christmas without Henry in 16 years. She declined the invitation to the Charmings and instead sat in front of the fire, looking at the untouched cookie and milk. She did it on auto pilot last night. The stocking was hung up too- empty. Wrapping up and grabbing a blanket and some food she stormed out the mansion. She needed space. From everything. She went to the graveyard...Robin. Oh how she wished he was still here. It would have made everything that little bit easier. Helped her believe that there was a future. She lay there, next to him and stared at the sky. She could have sworn she heard something "Stunning as always". But it was just a cruel trick. "Milady, you are where you need to be, just take a deep breath". She really was going crazy, perhaps it was time for another appointment with Archie.
As the sky darkened she forced herself up, and made the way to the other place she know she needed to go.
The sun was setting just as she arrived at his castle, she sat there and remembered all the times Henry had dragged her here. She remembers the first time he stumbled and banged his knee, his cries for momma. The time he had buried some treasure (his favourite car) and forgotten where...they had found it two hours later and henry's toothy grin makes her believe that he knew where it was the whole time.
She feels better after visiting Robin and the playground. She can do this. Survive. Maybe even live. For them.
/
She'd almost forgotten about the bottle- the panic chord if you will, she guesses that's a good thing . Not that she needed it. She knew that morning, had already made the way to the well when Hook arrived. They didn't say anything. They didn't need to. They jumped into the portal in what looked like just the right moment. Who did that princess think she was.
He'd grown up. He wasn't her little boy anymore. He was a handsome young man. A handsome brave prince. She had so much to say, but she just couldn't
"I missed you too" Henry said embracing her.
She didn't know how much she needed to hear that. To hear him. To see him.
They travelled back to his cottage and she would be lying if she said she wasn't happy it was at least clean, not quite fit for a prince but homely.
She stoked the fire and boiled some water, for what she wasn't quite sure, she guessed it was just a mother thing.
Henry chuckled to himself, his ma hadn't changed she was still the badass protective mamma bear with a heart of gold. He'd missed her incessant fussing, her gently cupping his face in her cheeks- it had always made him feel safe, loved. He loved the way she talked about Storybrooke- she genuinely loved the town and was proud of all of them. He also noticed he didn't talk about her. She never did. Would table her feelings. That had never worked with him.
"You forgot someone...you"
His mom's mask broke just slightly. "I'm fine"
She wasn't and both of them knew that she was lying.
He knew better to press though, she would tell him when she was ready. She always did.
She didn't want to talk about her. She wasn't strong enough. She knew she would have to leave soon, and Henry would stay here, his story still wasn't finished. She couldn't cry. Couldn't make the inevitable goodbye harder than it already would be.
Henry recognised the deflection, subtlty was neither of his mother's strong suits and he could use someone to talk to, even if he did feel slightly shy talking to his mother about a girl.
She knows her son, knows that he's fallen for Cinderella harder than he's fallen before, she also knows that he isn't a little kid anymore. This isn't a high school romance. Nor is life a fairytale. She just hopes Henry finds the happy beginning he deserves. She watches his face light up talking about her, his eyes widening and she can't help the huge smile on her face, he's happy. That's all she ever wanted for him. She still can't let go of his hand, literally clutching onto every second. She wants to tell him it will be ok. That it will all work out. She won't lie to him. Won't offer him a false future, she knows all too well the heartbreak that can cause.
It's time. To say goodbye. She promised herself she wouldn't do this. Wouldn't ask if he would come back. Wouldn't make him feel guilty. She just hates it...being apart and not knowing where he is, if he's ok.
He wishes he could go back, he misses storybrooke, the quaint village life, the family dinners, the new dangers every week, but he still needs to finish his story.
He hugs her and doesn't want to let go
Oh god he's got so tall.
Henry can't believe he didn't think of it before "Why don't you come too?"
Regina laughs at the way the words tumble out of his mouth, reminding her of his younger self. She thinks he's joking. She can't stay, can she?
"With you and other hook?"
Henry looks at her with those pleading eyes that she can't ever refuse and she knows she's in trouble
"Your stories not over. Maybe you just need to find it" he says with such optimism
Optimism that she doesn't share, she's had her chance at happily ever after and it's not on the cards for her, she's come to accept that. She needs to let Henry do this by himself.
His next words break her and fix her at the same time "Maybe I need you here too"
She loves him, more than anything in any realm. She would move heaven and earth for him. To know she is needed, wanted, that he wants her with him makes her happier than she ever thought she could be. She wills herself not to cry. Not now.
She smiles, and takes his hand, "Can this be one of your operations"
One last operation. For the road. They both share a laugh. Henry thinks for a second "Operation Next Chapter"
She nods her seal of approval and they head off to say goodbye.
/
One day in a realm far away, a young man would read a story to his daughter. The story was about a women who made broken look beautiful and made strong look invisible. She would carry the weight of the universe on her shoulders and make it look like a pair of wings. To some she was a Queen, to some she was a Mayor. To him she was his mom.
Thank you for reading, please let me know what you think I haven't written any fic in so long.