Plagg was bored, bored, bored.

He had spent the entire day cooped up in Adrien's pocket as his Chosen went to the fair with his friends, with not even a short akuma attack for a break. Plagg had been unable to get out and stretch his paws and, to add insult to injury, Adrien hadn't even brought any Camembert along because he had been worried about it smelling too much in the heat. Instead, he had bought Plagg cheese at the fair- gross, subpar cheese- and then continued on with his day as though nothing was wrong. Adrien and his friends had spent the whole day at the fair, from just after breakfast to long after dinner, and then as soon as they had gotten home, Adrien had crashed.

Without giving Plagg any Camembert.

Plagg scowled as he floated above the sleeping Adrien. The boy hadn't even bothered to finish changing into pajamas all the way- he had shucked his day clothes and pulled on some loose shorts, then fallen face first into his pillow to snore the night away. Plagg had tried kicking him several times- if Adrien were in literally any other position, he wouldn't be snoring at all- but it hadn't even made Adrien stir.

So Plagg was awake, grouchy, and feeling more than a little vengeful.

Floating over to the desk, he started pawing through the assorted memorabilia that Adrien had brought home from the fair. The fair itself had been Ladybug and Chat Noir-themed, celebrating one year of the superheroes protecting the city. That meant that Adrien had ended up with cat ears on a headband as well as a (rather cheap) Ladybug-printed yo-yo, as well as several plushies of both superheroes, a Miraculous-themed shirt, and a whole waterfall of Ladybug and Chat Noir themed temporary tattoos.

Plagg perked up and pawed through the temporary tattoos. There were ladybugs and neon green paw prints, each a little smaller than an Euro coin. Adrien and Nino had been joking about putting them on at the fair, but Adrien had finally set them aside, clearly never intending to put them on.

Well, that was too bad. Plagg had just made up his mind. Adrien was going to get tattooed, whether he wanted to or not. And, because the dork had gotten an excess of Ladybug-themed tattoos, Plagg knew which ones he was going to use.

Gathering up a whole armful of ladybug temporary tattoos, Plagg zipped over to the still-snoring Adrien and deposited his haul on his Chosen's back. Picking one up, he read the instructions on the back.

"Remove clear top sheet," Plagg read. "Position the tattoo on clean, dry skin. Press it firmly down and then hold a damp washcloth against the back of the tattoo. Hold in place for thirty seconds, and then carefully peel off the paper and let dry." He paused, considering. "Well, I don't really want to drag a washcloth around, and it would wake up Adrien, so..." He grinned and licked a paw. "This ought to work just as well, right?"

Twenty minutes later, Plagg dusted off his paws and inspected his work. A trail of bright ladybugs meandered up from Adrien's shoulder blade, ending just under his ear. The discarded papers from the temporary tattoos littered the bed. Plagg knew that he would have to pick them up soon to make sure that Adrien was surprised when he first saw himself in the mirror, but for now, Plagg let himself enjoy his work.

Ah, but revenge was sweet.

At five forty-five, an akuma woke up three-quarters of Paris with its roaring music. Adrien lurched out of bed with a groan, fumbling around for a shirt. He yanked it over his head and stumbled towards the window, pulling his shoes on as he went. After the first nighttime akuma battle where Adrien had showed up less than dressed and had to hide barefoot in an alley while Plagg recharged, he had never done it again.

A minute later, Chat Noir was flying through the air above the Paris skyline. The booming "music"- if it could be called that- made his head rattle. It was so loud that Chat Noir was having a hard time trying to figure out where the akuma was.

...well, he knew where he would be using his Cataclysm, at least. Even if he had to immediately go retreat and recharge, it would be worth it to not have to hear that awful music.

("Music.")

And then, as it turned out, the thudding speakers were exactly the thing that needed to be destroyed. In a massively stupid decision that was probably a side effect of tiredness, Hawkmoth had made the corrupted butterfly soak into a pair of large speakers, ones that were too large for even the supervillain to carry around easily. The fight had easily been the shortest one yet because of it, only lasting about thirty seconds after the superheroes arrived. Ladybug had arrived seconds before Chat Noir, effectively distracting the supervillain, while Chat Noir snuck in, pouncing and destroying the speakers with one swiping motion.

Ladybug had first given Chat Noir a slightly exasperated look for using his power so early on in the fight, but her expression had turned delighted after a second when the akuma fluttered free. She caught it with the ease of having done it hundreds of times, and then had to pause in slight confusion as she tried to figure out how to do her normal repairs after not having using her Lucky Charm yet. It didn't take long for her healing ladybugs to sweep over the (very minimal) damage that had been done, and then the superheroes retreated to the rooftops for a short breather before going back home to try to get a little more sleep.

"Nice eye," Ladybug said around a yawn as they landed. "How'd you spot that that was the corrupted item so fast?"

Chat Noir had to grin sheepishly, hand reaching back to ruffle his hair. "I, ah, didn't. I, uh, just thought it would be easier to fight without that noise rattling our brains."

"Ah. We were just lucky, then." Suddenly, Ladybug's attention got caught by something on the side of Chat Noir's neck and she craned her head to look. She got closer and Chat Noir, taken somewhat off guard, skittered a few steps back.

"Stay still," Ladybug complained with a laugh as she came forward again and he scooted back. "There's something on your neck, let me see it."

Startled, Chat Noir clapped a hand to his neck. "There is? What?"

"That's what I'm trying to see, stand still!" Ladybug peeled Chat Noir's hand away from his neck and pushed his hair out of the way so that she could see. Chat Noir squirmed, not used to the proximity when they weren't in the middle of a battle. After a moment, Ladybug's snort tickled his neck. "Chat Noir, why do you have a trail of ladybugs tattooed up your neck?"

"A what?" Almost instinctively, Chat Noir craned his head to look, then realized that of course he couldn't see his own neck. "I- I didn't- I don't have any tattoos!"

"They're like the ones I saw at the fair," Ladybug commented, hooking her finger in his collar to peer down it at the rest of his neck. "I can see at least five."

Chat Noir frowned. "I didn't know that they were giving people tattoos at the fair."

"Temporary ones, silly!" Ladybug looked deeply amused as she let go of his collar and stepped back. "Did you neglect your kwami, by any chance?"

Any lingering traces of confusion vanished in an instance and Chat Noir let out a long sigh. Plagg. Of course. "I didn't crazy neglect him by normal standards, but Plagg is picky. He probably thought that the cheeses I got for him weren't fine enough for his standards. He would totally decide to stick temporary tattoos on." He felt for his neck again, even though he wouldn't actually be able to feel the designs. His shoulders slumped. "So much for getting a little more sleep. I'll have to spend that time washing off the tattoos before my father sees them."

Ladybug giggled and plucked her yo-yo off of her hip to go leave. "Good luck with that. I'm going to go get a bit more sleep. See you later, Chat Noir!"

"See you later, Ladybug," Chat Noir called back. Then he frowned. "Good luck? How hard could it possibly be to remove a few temporary tattoos?"

As soon as he got home and detransformed, Adrien took only a glance in the mirror before stepping right into the shower. Sure, Plagg had plastered quite a few of the ladybug tattoos on him, but surely they would come off with a little soap and water.

He was wrong.

"They didn't even fade!" Adrien exclaimed as he inspected himself in the mirror. "How did they not even fade?"

Plagg snickered.

Adrien grabbed his phone, hoping to look up some tips on how to remove temporary tattoos. Instead, he came face-to-face with a reminder on his calendar about a photoshoot that he had after school that day. Adrien sucked in a breath.

Oh, there was no way he could have any trace of the ladybugs still on his neck when he went to the photoshoot. His father would be furious. Suddenly full of energy, he swiped off the notification and searched for ways to get temporary tattoos off. Scanning the list, Adrien tried not to groan.

He had a lot of work to do.

By the time Adrien was expected at breakfast, he had made absolutely no progress on getting the ladybug tattoos off. They were just as bright as they had been when he first got up.

"I don't understand why none of these are working," Adrien complained as he finally patted his neck dry. "You just put these on like normal, right?"

"I didn't use a washcloth," Plagg volunteered. "It was too big."

Adrien sent a confused look his way. "So what did you do, then?"

Plagg simply smirked and made a big show of miming licking his paw and then patting something. It took Adrien a second to catch on, and then he made a disgusted noise. "Plagg! That's gross! And I bet it's your spit that's making it impossible to get these things off!"

Plagg only cackled.

"And it's too warm to cover them up with a scarf- oh! Cover them up!" Adrien lunged for one of his bathroom drawers and frantically started sorting through it. After a moment, he found the container he was looking for and held it up triumphantly. "You're lucky I got to keep some of my concealer from my photoshoots! I can just cover them up until they fade on their own-" He paused. "They will fade on their own, right?"

"Regular tattoos fade too," Plagg said in way on answering.

"PLAGG!"

Plagg sighed. "Kid, skin cells only live for so long. Once the top few layers die off, then the tattoo will fade." He yawned. "My spit just made things soak in more than normal."

"Gross," Adrien complained again, but there was no real venom in it. He was too focused on applying the concealer to hide his tattoos. "Thank goodness the makeup people taught me how to make this actually look good so I could cover up my bruises from fencing and basketball. Otherwise this would look pretty weird."

"And you don't want your pretty-pretty skin looking all weird," Plagg taunted.

"And I can't have ladybug tattoos on my neck for the photoshoot I have later," Adrien corrected, twisting his neck to inspect his work. Thankfully the high-end concealer blended perfectly with his skin, coming across as perfectly natural instead of shiny or otherwise strange. It was definitely a good thing that he hadn't gotten sunburned at the fair like Marinette had, or else the concealer would have stood out right away.

Plagg sniffed, pretending to be offended. "I worked hard on those tattoos, thank you very much. They're well balanced."

"A tattooed model does not fit the image of the Gabriel brand," Adrien droned automatically as he finally left the bathroom and went to finish getting dressed. He had at least managed to get ready while he tried to remove the tattoos, since some of the removal strategies had to sit and soak in a bit. Otherwise he would be running crazy late and really be in trouble. "My father would have been furious."

Plagg only yawned.

Thankfully no one at school noticed anything off with Adrien's neck. The concealer held, even though it was really hot outside and Adrien had been concerned about sweating straight through it. Plagg had been sulky about no one else seeing his "super-hard work, Adrien, why don't you appreciate it more?", which made Adrien worry about getting more tattoos next time he was asleep. If Plagg was feeling particularly spiteful and decided to "decorate" his face...

Over lunch, Adrien gathered up all of his remaining temporary tattoos and brought them to school. Rose, who hadn't been able to go to the fair because she was out of town, accepted the tattoos with a squeal and a hug before running off to share them with Juleka. Adrien spotted ladybug and paw print tattoos dotting their arms later that afternoon.

At least someone got some use out of the tattoos.

Of course, Adrien couldn't be lucky all day. The makeup artists that touched up his face before photoshoots looked closer than his friends did, and it only took them a couple minutes to find the makeup patches dotting up his neck.

"One of my friends decided to give me a few temporary tattoos," Adrien claimed when he got questioned. "And he used something other than water, and now I can't get them off."

"Only you, kid," the makeup artist said with a laugh, patting his shoulder. "You did a good job with the concealer, at least. I don't think we need to do anything to it at all. You're lucky that fall shoots have a lot of high collars, your neck won't even be visible for most of the shots. Same with winter shoots once we get to them, but your temporary tattoos will be long gone by then."

Adrien could only hope the tattoos wouldn't last that long.

It took an entire month of daily scrubbing and makeup application before the last of the tattoos faded away to nothing. Plagg had erased the makeup on Chat Noir every time they transformed, which meant that while Adrien's normal friends didn't ever find out about the tattoos, Ladybug certainly saw them every time there was an attack.

"I hope you know how awful you are," Adrien grumbled in Plagg's general direction once he had detransformed and flopped face-first on his bed following the first fight after the tattoos had faded away completely. They had had a little time after the fight had ended, and Ladybug had pounced on the opportunity to peer under Chat Noir's collar and poke a little fun at him for no longer having the tattoos visible. "Ladybug still remembered the tattoos, and didn't you see? Alya posted a photo from two weeks ago yesterday and you could see the tattoos clearly! The whole world is gonna see those tattoos."

Plagg only sniggered. "You deserved it for feeding me that awful deep-fried cheese. And you're lucky that it wasn't any worse."

"How could it possibly be worse? You branded me with ladybugs!"

"I could have put one on your face," Plagg pointed out with a bit of a snigger. "Or, even better- what if they had been giving out tattoos with Ladybug's face on them? What d'you think Ladybug would have thought of that?"

"PLAGG!"

A/N: As with most of my stories, this is a one-shot and is therefore complete. Please review, it really makes my day!

This particular story was inspired by a Tumblr post from forever ago.