A/N: I do not own Itakiss. Never have, never will.

October

Kotoko was not sure why or how she found herself at the entrance of the Tonan University Medical Building. She remembered deciding that sixteen straight days of tears were enough and that she needed to get back into the college world. Since Naoki was now firmly settled in the director's seat at Pandai, she had no fear of running into him. But...the medical department?

Well, she squared her shoulders, as long as she was there she might as well walk in. Just so she could look at what might have been. Now Naoki would never walk these halls, never stretch his marvelous mind around the wonders of human life, never become the doctor that he had finally concluded was his life's work after so long a search.

She sniffed. It even smelled different here. Sort of extra clean without all the pine scent. There were a few classes in session, and she leaned against the wall and peered through a narrow window at students watching their instructor point to a projected image.

"Can I help you with something?"

Kotoko squeaked and jumped at the deep voice suddenly speaking so close to her ear. "Oh, ah, no, I was just, uh…"

"Considering the possibility of studying here?" the handsome young man inquired with a smile.

"No, no, no, no!" Kotoko waved her hands frantically in denial. "I'm not nearly smart enough to be a doctor! I was just…" she turned again and looked into the classroom, "here to see what someone wanted to do, but will now never be able to."

"Someone close to you?" He placed a gentle hand on one of her arms.

"You might say that," she answered. To her shame, a small sob ended the sentence. "It's lost to him...forever."

"Here," he began to guide her to the building snack bar, hearing in her voice the tears that were about to fall. "Let's have some coffee and you can tell Uncle Nishigaki all about it."

The senior medical student treated her with gentle care, teasing her on such a wide range of subjects that Kotoko found herself smiling after about ten minutes.

"It looked as if you wished to study medicine to fulfill his dream," he hazarded, deciding that it was time to segue back to the original conversation.

She sighed and rested her chin on one hand. "If only I could. But like I said, I don't have the brains for it. I was in Class F in high school."

"What does that have to do with it?" he asked. "You graduated, didn't you?"

Kotoko laughed. "You don't understand how low Class F students are at Tonan High."

"Anyway," he continued, "choosing a career in another's name isn't the best selection method. You need to find what you want to do."

"And there's the problem," Kotoko admitted. "I don't know what I want to do. What he would have been able to do—well, I admired him so much. I would have loved to have stood at his side and helped him. I believe I would have enjoyed anything that he chose. Now, I have nothing."

Nishigaki played with the coffee stirrer for a moment. "You say that you're not suited to be a doctor. But, if you admire the medical profession so much, have you considered nursing? That could be considered a job that would have helped him. Plus, you would get the satisfaction of continuing his work."

"Nursing." Kotoko repeated it softly. "But I'm a third-year literature student."

He waved his hand in dismissal. "So? Study and take the transfer test. If you really want to, you can set your mind to do anything."

"Maybe I could get some subject material…?" She looked up at him with a light in her eyes that had not been seen in weeks.

"Certainly." As he waved her off a half hour later, he looked at the new contact in his phone. Aihara Kotoko. I'll just wait until the grief over your lost love has subsided a bit before making my move. I prefer to avoid relationships with lachrymose partners.

It was always worse the evenings that the fiancée came for dinner, Irie Yuuki concluded as he observed his mother's sleeping form dispassionately. He was wondering if he was as cold as his older brother, feeling neither disgust nor sympathy as he carried her empty wine bottle and glass to the kitchen.

Why hadn't that girl stayed and fought for Naoki? She had proclaimed her love for him enough through the past three years. Since Yuuki knew good and well that Naoki loved her in return, he didn't think it would have taken much to tear down the wall around his heart.

And Onii-chan! Thinking that the company was more important than family! Because, even though his fingernails would have to be torn out for him to admit it, Kotoko and her father were family.

They had quietly moved out the day after Naoki had brought home Sahoko and her grandfather, Chairman Oizumi, the rich investor who appeared to have purchased his brother, body and soul. Seriously, after knowing that live-wire Kotoko, why would his brother think that placid Sahoko would suit him?

Something had to be done. He nodded his head with determination. "And I suppose I'll have to be the one to do it!"

A/N: Yes, this is the story that spawned How Many Kisses? It will definitely go in a different direction.