Episode 17

Deacon´s day with the girls.

Deacon stood at the kitchen island where Rayna just left him to go and help Sadie. Deacon looked at the girls sleeping on the couch. It was an eventful evening yesterday, not only for them it seems. For him these past 48 hours have been like a roller coaster. Started up and high with Rayna asked him to sing with her at her 10 year anniversary at the Opry, to dive when he told her about his cancer and they argue all day at the cabin. Then go up again when he couldn´t resist Rayna anymore and denying them what they both wanted and they finally made love again. And then to dive down again by telling the girls about him being sick.

Maddie had been so happy, as they predicted she would be. It had been a rough night for all of them. The girls were crying and didn´t let them out of their sight. It took forever for them to fall asleep, to where Rayna and Deacon could have some time alone. They draw back to the music room and talked some more before they got a few hours sleep on the couch in there close together. Deacon is pondering on if he should wake the girls or let them sleep.

He did let them sleep and after they woke up, they went out for breakfast. That didn´t go too well, Maddie was angry and hurt, and didn´t want to talk to him, snapped at Daphne. His offer to sing and play guitar at his house did nothing to her mood. Once they were at his place, Maddie locked herself into Scarlett´s room. That left Deacon and Daphne to sing by themselves. Daphne chose one of Rayna´s old songs. When they were done, Daphne got a serious expression on her face.

"Deacon?"

"Yes?"

"At breakfast you said we could ask questions and talk about your cancer, is that true?"

"Of course, sweetie. You can ask me anything, I may not have the medicine answers, but don´t be afraid to ask."

"Does it hurt?"

"No, not at the moment. I´m just a bit more tired than before."

"Will you lose your hair?"

"I think only people going through radiation and chemo treatments lose their hair, and I´m not available for those treatments."

"Why not?"

"In my case it´s too late, if my cancer been found earlier perhaps. Now my only chance is to find a donor. And as we said last night, if I don´t get one in time, I will die."

"I don´t want you to die."

"Me neither, sweetie. I have so much to live for now."

"Are you afraid?"

"Yes."

"You have us, we will support you." Daphne moved and gave him a hug.

"Thanks sweetie. That actually helps more than you think, knowing I have people that love me and support me."

.

Maddie hadn´t changed mood. She refused to answer him or opened the door when he knocked at it. Daphne informed him that Teddy just pulled up outside. Maddie must have called him. Deacon went outside to talk to Teddy, told him that he was sick. Told him that Maddie shouldn´t run away from talking to him about it. Teddy managed to talk Maddie into staying with Deacon, but she didn´t leave the room. So after he talked to Daphne, Teddy left again.

Deacon wanted to give Teddy and Daphne some privacy, so he kept himself in the kitchen started making dinner. Daphne joined him in the kitchen and helped him. They were all done with the chopping and slicing when Maddie emerged. The taste test got a 'Pretty good' from Daphne, he was happy with that..

Deacon and Maddie talked, cleared the air a bit, so dinner conversation was a happy event. They talked about when Rayna first was inducted into the Opry Hall of Fame. How nervous she was, how many dresses she tried on. Deacon remembers clearly how beautiful she looked in that black dress she finally decided on. After dinner they washed up after them and then went back to Rayna´s house.

When Rayna came home, she found Deacon slumber on the couch. She smiles and sit down beside him, he stirs when he feels the couch moves.

"Hey."

"Hey."

"You´re here."

"Yeah. I´m here. I think I gotta go home though. I´ve been wearing these clothes a little too long." Both chuckle.

"Okay, but stay five more minutes. I need the soothing and comfort of your arms. It´s been a hell of a day. Calming a frightened Sadie down. Then when I finally got to Juliette. She was furious and while she was raging about the baby shower her water broke, so we had to rush to the hospital."

"What? Is she okay?"

"Yes. I stayed with her until Avery came. They got a baby girl. How did it go at your end?"

"We had a few things to sort out, me and Maddie talked a little, answered a couple of questions from Daphne. Teddy came over, apparently Maddie had called him, but we managed to work it out. I´m pretty tired myself and need some soothing too." Rayna closed her eyes as she lay there with her head on his shoulder and caressing his hand. They lay there for a while, just enjoying being close to each other.

Deacon kissed Rayna´s temple. "Also, I think the girls are ok, but... I know they could use some mama time."

"Thank you for today."

Deacon pushes a string of hair away from Rayna´s face and kiss her. "You got it."

Episode 18

Deacon´s phone call to Rayna and Maddie´s apology.

"Hey."

"Hey Mom."

"Maddie? I thought it was Deacon."

"He is here. His phone was nearest. I need to apologize to you. I did say some things I didn´t mean. I just wanna tell you I´m really sorry. I don´t think it was cool that you found out about Colt the way you did. I totally should have told you before instead of lying to you about it."

"I really appreciate hearing that."

"Well, since I can´t come to the concert tonight, do you think that you could get me a Jade St John T-shirt?"

"Yeah, I can pull that off. Will you put Deacon on for a second, please?"

"Yeah, here he is."

"Hey."

"Hey, thank you for going over there and talking to her."

"You got it. I tell you what, she is really sorry. And I´m sorry too. I shouldn´t have run out like that. I don´t wanna run from this, or from you or from... Hell, anybody. You are right. You are my family, you and the girls. I want us to be together as a family. I have wanted this for so long. I don´t want to screw it up."

"You know, nothing in the world makes me happier than hearing you say that. And this illness is your truth. And you can tell it whenever you damn well please."

"You know, they got a saying in the program, 'You´re only as sick as your secrets.' Right now, I´m pretty sick of being sick."

"Well, I´m sick of missing you. So will you do me a favour and bring our daughter to the Bridgestone?"

"I can do that."

...

Rayna and Deacon´s evening after they got home from Jade St John´s concert.

"Rayna? Are you in here?" Deacon called out as he entered the bedroom.

Rayna exits the bathroom, dressed for bed in a long T-shirt. "Yeah. How did your talk with Luke go? I don´t see any bruise knuckles or black eyes, so I guess good?"

Deacon chuckles. "Yes, it went good. No punches. I just wanted to tell him about me being sick. Despite this last year difference between us, he was a friend before all of this."

"I´m glad it went well, because now when Maddie and Colt are boyfriend and girlfriend, we are bound to see more of him."

"Yeah, guess you are right."

Deacon started to undress. When he had removed his shirt, he felt her hands on his back. "Are you still tired?"

Deacon turned around smiling. "I´m never going to be too tired for you."

Rayna smiled too, and put her arms around his neck. He leaned in and caught her lips with his. A kiss that left them both breathless. She gave him a little push so he fell down on the bed and straddled him.

"I think we are a little bit overdressed for this."

"That can be easily fixed."

"You read my mind."

"I´m good at reading you. I know that look. I have seen it before."

"Then you know what will happen?"

"I do. I love you, Ray."

"Me too, Deacon. So much."

Episode 19

Rayna and Deacon are on the phone.

"Good morning."

"Morning."

"I feel a little guilty, abandon you on your first day with us, since you moved in yesterday a bit surprising. A very pleasant surprise, don´t get me wrong. I love that you decided to move in with us. I just wanted to give you the grand tour."

"We can do that when you are back, no rush. We have christened our bedroom and the music room, the most important places."

"Yes, we sure did. It was amazing and very enjoyable. A moment to remember and I want to repeat it, very much and often frankly. What made you decide to move in? We didn´t discuss it more after the morning when the girls said it was okay, when they gave you their approval."

"I listen to what you said, what Scarlett said, what I want and that is to be with you. It´s always been you Ray. I don´t want to waste more time, when I can spend it with you and the girls, rather than an empty house. Time is too precious to waste now with our situation."

"I totally agree with you, I´m so looking forward to have you in my bed every day, to fall asleep in your arms and wake up in the same arms. I have missed that so much."

"Me too. It´s been a long time since we lived together. That´s one other thing that made me hesitate, I´m so scared that I somehow will screw it up. Disappoint you again."

"That´s in the past. You are a different man today, a better man. We will be fine, Deacon."

"I hope you are right, Ray."

"I´m always right, remember?"

"Shut up." Deacon chuckles.

"You know it´s the truth. Admit it."

"Never."

"I see Bucky coming, our meeting is about to start I assume. I will see you later when I get home."

"I will be here."

"Bye."

"Bye."

...

Rayna and Deacon are talking at the hospital after Maddie and Scarlett left the room.

"It´s nothing, Rayna. I feel fine."

"I know you are, but what if they don´t get this fever of yours down in time. It´s a big if, you could lose your chance on this liver."

"I will get this surgery, I know I will. Everything will be fine. We are gonna think positively remember, Ray?"

"Yes, I know. I´m so happy they have found a donor. I have prayed so much that they would. I can´t be losing you now."

"You won´t, I promise you."

...

Rayna´s short prayer when they rolled Deacon into surgery.

Please God, save that man. I love him so much, I always have. But my choices haven´t always shown that and now that I got him back, you can´t take him away from me. I want him. I need him in my life. I want to grow old with him, have the life we always dreamt off, talked about. The life we are meant to have. I don´t know what I will do without him. Please, let him live. Please, save him.

Episode 20

Deacon makes good on his promise when Rayna gets home, even when it´s very late.

When Rayna stepped inside her house it was a little after two in the morning or night depend on how you count. She put her purse and keys on the kitchen island and went to sink down on the couch. She took a pillow, hugged it to her chest and pulled her legs up and the tears started to fall again.

She failed. She failed to convince Beverly to help save her brother, her only brother´s life. How could she not want to do it? Sure, it meant a few weeks recovery and an operation, but these days the chance of such an operation to be risky is very little. She herself would do it in a heartbeat, if she was a match and could save Deacon´s life. She would do anything.

She dried her tears and made it up the stairs. Rayna opened and closed the bedroom door after her as softly as she could, so she wouldn´t wake Deacon. She looked at his sleeping form in bed. She is trying to be positive, but honestly she is terrified Deacon will die. As she said to Beverly, it was a miracle they found one donor. For every day that passes, decreases Deacon´s chance to live. She removes her shoes and sneak her way to the bathroom.

Rayna emerged from the bathroom just in her bra and panties. She sat down on the bed. She heard Deacon stirred behind her.

"Ray?"

"Yes, it´s me. Go back to sleep."

"Did you just got home? What´s the time?"

"It´s late. I was hoping I wouldn´t wake you. You need your sleep." Rayna removes her bra and stretches her hand for an old T-shirt. She rolls her shoulders to get some of the tension away. She feels him shifts behind her and then his hands on her shoulders.

"Let me get some of that tense to go away."

"I´m fine, Deacon. I´m tired and need to sleep and so do you."

"I know you are tired and I also can see that you are not fine. Your shoulders are very hard. Let me give you a massage, you will sleep more relaxed then."

"Fine, if you insist. I just don´t think you should lose any sleep at the moment. You know it´s important that you sleep well to stay as healthy as you can. Doctor´s order."

"Yes, I know. But loosing sleep with you is one of my favorite things to do."

Rayna closes her eyes and enjoys both the massage and Deacon´s touch. After a while when she feels him kiss her neck and his hands caress their way to her front to cup her breasts. That made her smile after this long and totally worthless day. She remembered what he said earlier on the phone 'you hurry back and I´m gonna do what I can to salvage your day'. And what he said even earlier, 'that he was sick of being sick' and 'that he would like to be the one to take care of her'.

Well, a girl could have it a lot worse than the man you love wants to make you feel better and wants to make love to you. After all, sometimes it´s worth breaking the rules, even doctors. And the fact that one touch from Deacon really is all it takes to turn her on. Rayna turns around and put her arms around his neck.

"Hey. What are you doing?"

"Just trying to make you feel better."

"Oh yeah? It´s working. Thank you, I´m feeling much better."

"Then my work is done." Deacon said smiling.

"Oh no, you have to finish what you started Mister."

"Yeah?"

"Oh yes, or you will be in the hospital for other things than your cancer."

"We can´t have that, can we?"

"No, I rather keep you here with me."

Deacon smiles and pulls her close to him and at the same time leans back on the bed. He gentle rolls them so he is on top. He teases her with feather light kisses, all over, but not her mouth. They abruptly stop when Rayna have enough and take his head with both her hands and pulls him to her, so she can kiss him properly. The kiss deepens and Deacon stop teasing and give them what they both need and want.

Episode 21

Deacon´s speech before they sing at the Bluebird Cafe.

"Well, I can´t tell you, uh, what it feels like to see so many, uh, familiar and caring faces out there. You´re about the best extended family a guy could have at a time like this. The Bluebird is one of my favourite places to play at, it´s like my home ground. I feel so welcome here, I have been since my very first time. Rayna and I met here, so to us, it´s a very special place."

"Yes, Deacon and I have so many memories here. Both personal and music wise. The music history here at the Bluebird is amazing. So many country artists have started their career here, including us." Rayna chipped in.

"Music, I think it´s safe to say has been there, for all of us, um, through hard times. Without music in my life I would be lost, I don´t even want to think what that would be like. Through music you can say so much, express so many feelings. This is a song that, uh... Well, we wrote this one a long time ago, huh?"

"Mmm-hmm. We thought it would be a good one for tonight."

Episode 22

Rayna and Beverly are arguing in the guest room.

"You all right? You got everything you need?"

"I took all my meds. Don´t need to be checked up on, though."

"Well, that´s not what I was doing, but okay. Look, Beverly, we have never been friends, never getting along with each other. Can we be civil towards each other? For everyone´s sake?"

"We can try, I guess."

"I wanted to say thank you, to let you know how grateful I am for the enormous sacrifice that you´re making tomorrow. And if I haven´t said it enough, thank you. It means the world to me. I think you know how much Deacon means to me."

"Yeah, sure. That´s why you dumped him and married Teddy Conrad."

"Well, I made a mistake. I´m not perfect, far from it, but I never stoped loving Deacon."

"You stole him from me, we were the ones that should be out touring."

"You can´t possibly be angry for that still, are you? It was over 25 years ago."

"It should have been us."

"Well, I´m so sorry then, but you could have joined him, you know. I invited you too. If you had only joined the tour, maybe something had opened up. I would guess it would be a bigger chance for anything to happen than staying in Natchet. I am really grateful and I would really like to compensate you for more than those week off from your work."

"Well, I´m not doing it for you. But I guess I´m doing it because of you."

"Okay."

"You put me in a terrible position when you showed up with that cheque, because, you see, I´d either be the bitch who needed a million dollars to save her brother or I´d be the bitch who a million dollars wasn´t enough for. Either way, you come out the hero trying to save him. But here is the thing... None of this matters without me, right? So it turns out I´m the hero."

"You are saving the life of the man I love, and for that I will pin a medal on you myself. Get you some sleep."

Beverly chuckles. "Will do."

.

Rayna left the guest room and went around the corner before she stopped and leaned against the wall. Impossible woman. It´s hard to believe that Scarlett and Deacon is from the same family. But she is saving Deacon´s life and that´s all that matters. Rayna can´t save him herself and she said she would do anything in her power and right now that means being nice to Beverly. She can do that, if that means Deacon will live. She could smile and play nice with Beverly, be her beck and call for a while. A life without Deacon would not be a whole life.