Full Circle: An Interlude

By Shannon (aka KittyShan, LancesKitten)

Originally Published 10/20/2015

Disclaimers: Voltron and all associated characters are owned and copyrighted by WEP. Original/new characters belong to the author.

Rating: PG - Mild Language, Mild Violence, Innuendo

Prince Bandor had arrived a few days ago, ready to take his sister home. Their reunion had been both heart-warming and heart-breaking all at once. When Princess Romelle had finally laid eyes on her baby brother, she had become inconsolable. The mixture of grief and trauma she was experiencing would take a very long time to fade away. But for now, the youngest member of the Royal House of Pollux just held his big sister tight and promised she was safe.

It was quiet in the hanger bay. It was hard to believe that in just a few short hours, the long lost hero would once more disappear. Lance shook his head. He had done everything in his power to avoid Sven the last few days, and now all he wanted was a few moments with his friend.

'Are we still friends?' He wondered how that worked. Sven might not remember him, but he sure did remember Sven. Along with Keith, the three had been inseparable as kids. They had lived in the same neighborhood growing up, so they had played together and gone to school together. They had chased girls, played football, learned to drive and fly... And they'd even had a few good old-fashioned fist-fights.

But nothing had ever come between them. Not before all of this.

Lance crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned back and balanced himself by placing one booted foot against the wall behind him. He dropped his chin down to his chest as he considered the situation.

He hated this war - and he loathed that witch.

The day they had believed Sven killed, he had promised himself, there would come a day when he would kill that old bitch if it was the last thing he ever did. Over the passing months, some of the fire he'd felt had diminished, but never had it flickered out. Instead, it had become like a peat fire, smoldering deep below the surface, unseen. A dangerous thing that could be instantly set aflame and destroy everything in its path.

A part of him knew he should let go of this anger, but when he had seen Sven...

He hadn't known what to think. His mind had been unable to process what his eyes told him was real. It was impossible! It couldn't be real! Sven was dead - was he losing his mind? Was it a ghost? His mind reeled and his body refused to cooperate, his legs giving out. He found himself on his knees with nothing left to do but pray.

And Lance had never been the praying type. But he had prayed for this for months - he had begged to be awakened from this nightmare and find Sven was alive and unharmed.

He had prayed for his guilt to be assuaged; to find he hadn't been the one responsible for his friend's death, after all.

Months before, Lance had held Sven's hand as life fled from his battered body. How could the same man now be standing here? How could he be alive? Months of mourning... The grief had eaten at his very soul.

When Lance closed his eyes at night, he re-lived that day. It had been the same way every night for nearly a year now. The terror he'd felt when Hagar had trapped him in her magical net, the relief when he saw Sven coming to his rescue. When Sven had ordered him to go for help, Lance had known...

The witch was just too powerful for any of them to take on alone. Yet, he had left his friend to do just that. It was his fault Sven was dead.

But Sven wasn't dead, anymore.

Tears stung at the backs of his eyelids and Lance pushed off the wall, spinning around and landing a punch against the smooth plaster with all his might. And again.

And again.

Tears streamed down his cheeks and he looked down at his now battered hand. 'Great, more scars.' His hands were already covered in the things from all the fights he'd been in as a kid. He studied his knuckles which were already swelling, blood flowed from numerous tiny cuts and scratches, a dark purple bruise discolored his skin.

"Shit," he shook his head. He wouldn't hear the end of it from Keith, he knew his brother would go on and on about controlling his temper. If only Keith understood how badly his heart was ach-

"Lance?"

'Great,' Lance thought, 'of course Keith would show up just in time to see-'

A hand on his shoulder stopped him mid-thought.

"Listen, Chief," Lance said as he turned to face his brother, but found himself at a loss for words when he realized it had been Sven's hand on his shoulder.

"I wanted to speak with you," Sven said, uncertainty threading his voice.

"I told him I'd come along and help find you." Keith said. He eyed his brother's hand and was, indeed, tempted to lecture him on self-control. But whether or not Lance realized it, Keith knew how horrible this had all been for his little brother. He also knew if this was the most self-destructive thing Lance did, they would be lucky.

Lance opened his mouth, but for once, nothing came out. He was finally able to mutter something that sounded like, "yeah, well."

"I'll leave you two to talk, but I'll be just over there," Keith indicated where Bandor's ship sat, now being loaded with medical supplies for the good people of Pollux.

As Keith walked away, Lance stood very still and studied Sven. Lance had a moment where he was tempted to pinch Sven, just to make sure he really wasn't a ghost after all.

"I have not had the chance to speak with you," there was a questioning note in Sven's voice.

Lance shook his head. "It's all right."

"I don't think it is," Sven gave Lance a weak smile. "And I wasn't apologizing. You have been avoiding me."

From Lance's glare, there was no doubt he was feeling hot under the collar and ready to argue. Sven didn't know how he knew, but he was certain that this was how Lance dealt with pain. It was easy to allow hurt and pain to overwhelm, to let them fester and fuel anger. He didn't want that for Lance.

"What are you saying?" Lance asked heatedly. "Are you trying to say it's my fault?"

Sven had a sense of déjà vu - as if he'd had many other conversations much like this one in his un-remembered life.

"I cannot accuse you of anything, when I do not remember what happened." Sven stated honestly. "But, it seems to me, you are blaming yourself for whatever it is that burdens your heart."

Lance shook his head. "You don't know what you're talking about!"

"Perhaps not," Sven conceded. "But if my friend were suffering, I would want him to know that letting go of anger doesn't mean you are forgiving a wrong, or that you are allowing someone to get away with their sins."

Tears filled Lance's eyes and he looked away in an attempt to keep Sven from seeing his pain.

"Letting go of anger," Sven continued, "forgiveness, is about you, not the person who wronged you. There is a quote I do remember...

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned."

Lance took a deep breath and looked at Sven. "Who said that?"

"Buddha."

"Yeah," Lance said. "Well?"

"Just consider it," Sven said. "Please."

Lance jammed his fists into the pockets of his old leather jacket. For all the world, he looked like a pouting child.

"The ship will be leaving for Pollux soon." Sven said.

"Yeah." Lance's voice had a bit of a tremor to it. "Have a good trip. Stay safe."

Sven sighed. "Lance, the thing I wanted to talk to you about..."

"What is it?"

"You were a skinny kid."

Lance looked confused.

"When Keith and I were, oh, seventeen or so, there was a girl I asked out. She had a boyfriend, but I didn't know it. When I showed up to pick her up for our date, her boyfriend and three of his buddies were waiting for me and they kicked my ass."

Lance now stood with his mouth hanging open, listening with rapt attention as Sven continued.

"The next day, you and Keith showed up at school with black eyes and busted lips. Your mom called my mom - we were all grounded for a month!"

"Did Keith tell you that?"

"No, when I saw you punch the wall, I remembered how you got that one big scar across your knuckles - when you knocked that girl's boyfriend's front teeth out. You were fifteen and I remember thinking you were a skinny kid, but you sure were scrappy."

"I- I don't," Lance stuttered, tears now streaming freely down his face.

Sven grabbed his friend and pulled him into a hug. "I remember you."

Lance pulled back and excitement flooded his voice. "What else? What else can you remember?"

Sven shook his head. "Bits and pieces, not much, really."

Lance looked crestfallen.

"But I will tell you, I've remembered my mother but not my father. I've remembered how to pilot a ship, but not how I learned to do so. I seem to be remembering the things and the people that mean the most to me."

"I let you down," Lance's head drooped. "I'm so sorry Sven."

"I wish I could say I remembered that day, but I don't." Sven spoke with an unmistakable certainty. "But, I have no doubt that you did everything in your power to help me, and, my friend, none of it was your fault."

There was a twinkling of laughter from across the room; Lance and Sven looked up to find a pair of almost identical women standing close to one another. The pair of women whispered furiously, sparing a glance over at Keith, then in the direction where Sven and Lance now stood.

"Do you love her?" Lance asked when he saw the way Sven's eyes lit up at the sight of Princess Romelle.

"I-" Sven's cheeks turned a deep red. "I don't know yet, but I think I might. It's crazy - I hardly know her but I know I can't imagine being without her."

The men watched as Romelle bumped Allura's hip with her own and made a squeezing motion with her hands in the direction of where Keith was now bending over and inspecting the serial number on a crate; unknowingly, he was giving the girls a great view of his perfectly shaped rear-end. Allura's eyes widened at her cousin's teasing and she slapped playfully at Romelle's arm before they both burst into laughter. Keith turned around and eyed the two women suspiciously, which resulted in an even louder and longer-lasting eruption of giggles.

"Does Keith know?"

"Know what?" Lance asked.

Sven grinned. "That Princess Allura has fallen for him?"

"Nah," Lance was now grinning too. "He doesn't have a clue."

END

Author's Note: A huge thank you to my dear friend, and beta reader, Lynne (aka KittyLynne). Your input is always invaluable - thank you! : )