A/N: Klance fluff, lions and paladins family fluff, kind of set early in the series. Nothing really is going to mention much canon plot unless it happened in episodes more or less, they've been a team for a few months now, and everyone is more or less getting along like 78% of the time. (non-explicit male x male, but it's there, and there will be some kiss scenes. Don't like, don't read.) I own nothing except my OC and the non-canon plot of this fic. If I did own Voltron, Klance would already be a thing, and it would probably not be a kids show anymore. It's probably not great, keep in mind that I'm a highschooler, and not an outstanding writer. Hope you enjoy!

Our Family is a Little Strange, but We Love it that Way

Chapter one: See me through the walls I've built

Keith POV: I groaned in annoyance as I climbed aboard the blue lion. Lance was already setting up in the pilot's seat, and glanced back at me with a kind of resigned look on his face, and said nothing as I buckled in. Allura had decided that it would be a good idea to send the two of us on a diplomatic excursion to a small planet nearby. I always suck at diplomacy. Me and Lance? Its rarely a good combination outside of battle.

We were silent and awkward during takeoff, the weird tension that had been building between us for the last two weeks making everything feel stiff. Which was most likely the reason we got paired up in the first place. That's Allura's usual tactic when it gets awkward between a few of us. Find a small, relatively peaceful mission lasting around five to ten earth days, and force us to pair up with whoever our tension is centered around. Usually, it works pretty well. Except I'm fairly certain that the tension between me and Lance is there for a completely different reason than Pidge getting irritated with Hunk for messing with her stuff for the nth time.

We still hadn't started speaking-or arguing-after several minutes of flight. I sighed quietly, sneaking a sidelong look at Lance from the passenger bench. His face was stony calm-never a good thing with Lance, as I had learned. Lance usually wore his heart on his sleeve-most of it anyways. In the months we had spent training together, all of us had begun to pick up on each other's little quirks. Lance, when he was truly, genuinely upset about something, was like a caldera. Calm on the surface, but raging and unstable underneath that facade. One wrong move could summon a hurricane.

No, our awkwardness is not because of something stupid we said-or maybe it is, I don't know anymore. Its because of what I'm not saying. I've been pulling away from the team, mostly to distance myself from Lance. Because stupid me had to fall in love with the guy who hates my guts. Because, isn't there supposed to be some rule that says "You can't date your co-workers?" Because damnit I've had a crush on him-his stupid, charming, flirtatious self- since we were in the Garrison. Which might have originally been fine. I could handle it like every other stupid crush I've had on people since I figured out I was gay when I was twelve. Except I couldn't. Because my "strategy" for dealing with these things wasn't to confront them head on, like almost everything else, but instead to ignore it, shun it, and pray to every deity that may or may not exist that it will go away.

But Lance was always there. And me being the socially inept jackass that I am, could only find a solution in pushing him away. Again, and again, and again. Somehow, in all of that, Lance stuck around, god only knows why, and we became rivals. The rivalry, and the crush, and my general dislike of the higher ups, ended in me getting expelled, finding the lions, reuniting with Shiro and Lance, and really meeting Hunk and Pidge. Over the months I was gone from the Garrison, I thought I got over Lance. Then he shows up and pulls the old rivalry shit again-trying to save Shiro as well. The second I looked up to see him, my heart had stuttered in my chest, and my mind went blank. Because shit, he got even cuter in those seven months. Despite all of that, I felt I had kept my very confusing crush on the-quite obviously straight-paladin well enough under wraps.

Then two weeks ago happened. Both of us had been doing some cleaning in one of the castle's many storage rooms, and we ended up arguing-nothing new there-over something stupid. Then-I burry my face in my hands at the memory, trying to suppress my blush. Fuck, I am the red paladin damnit, but looking at Lance for a second too long turns me into a blushing school-girl.

Flashback

I packed up the box I was looking through in the Altean storage room, and shoved it back onto the shelf. I sniffed quietly, and looked for another box to sort through as Lance swept ten thousand years of dust from the place.

My nose tickled again. Oh no. I tried to suppress it in my sleeve, but only succeeded in burying my face into a patch of dust- which only aggravated the mild allergy attack.

"Achoo!" I sneezed. I heard Lance stop his sweeping, the rustle of the broom ceasing. I sneezed three more times until the allergy bout stopped.

"Oh my god." Lance muttered. Staring at me with wide, amused eyes, and a vicious smile. "That was adorable."

I groaned. Figures he'd have heard me. My face warmed at the comment, but I stubbornly ignored the urge to duck my head in embarrassment. I had to have the stupidest sneeze ever. I had been teased for it pretty much my whole life. "Fuck off," I growled. The tactic losing its intimidation factor due to my sniffling nose and pink face.

"You sound just like a kitten sneezing!" He laughed, eyes tearing up with mirth.

"Shut up Lance!"

"No! Oh, Pidge is gonna love this. I wonder if any of her cameras could have caught that.." Lance mused, pulling out his pager to ask the younger crew member about it.

I growled again, lunging for the device to stop him.

He laughed and danced away from me, blue eyes glittering with amusement.

'Oh god. He looks too adorable like that.' I lamented internally, heart twisting in a not-unpleasant way at the look of utter mirth on his face. "Lance, stop" I ordered, lunging for him again.

He looked at me smugly, eyes dancing wickedly, "Make me."

I stopped thinking. Things usually went badly when I did that. Oh well. I lunged for him again, this time tackling him to the floor. My only goal was to get the pager out of his hands. Lance froze underneath me, and I snatched the pager. About .05 ticks later, I realized what position we were in. I was straddling his waist, one hand on his chest pinning him to the ground, and the other stretched above us both, the pager half in my hand, half in his. My eyes widened and I froze, information catching up to me. I tilted my head down rapidly to look at Lance 'Shit I shouldn't have done that.' I thought desperately. Wide blue eyes stared back-much closer than they should have been. All thoughts vanished when Lance opened his mouth to breathe-his breath should not have been that close to my mouth.

There were literal millimeters between us. If either of us moved, our lips would be brushing, or our noses would collide. I blanked, face frozen in shock-and probably fear too-as my brain abandoned me to the whirling thoughts of 'OhShitOhShitOhShitOhShitOhShit'.

One of the doors slammed down the hallway, jarring me out of whatever trance I was in-blue eyes STop it brain. No. Bad. I leapt off him, leaving the pager in his grip anyways, and quickly retreated to the bathroom.

Present Time

The two of us hadn't spoken to each other properly-or argued much, which, given that its us and when we're together we can't seem to behave like we're older than two, is even weirder. We weren't fighting. We weren't avoiding each other-I think. We just went about our normal schedules. Without really interacting outside of team stuff and meals...which was also team stuff. Shit.

I sighed quietly, and tilted my head to look at the passing stars as Blue guided us to the planet. The thought of the lion reminded me of Red, and my chest ached a little. Everyone knew that the bond between a paladin and their lion was special, but somehow I got the feeling that mine was a little different from the others. Different. Again. I've always been the "different" one. Foster parents. Jumping home to home until I went to the Garrison, and was declared legal. As weird as it was, and probably sad too honestly, Red felt like a mom to me.

Sure, I've had foster moms who tried. I've had a couple of them who were actually really great. I just suck. At everything. Especially opening up to people. It was weird if I thought about it too long-which I try not to do anymore, it only causes me even more anxiety than usual. Red, the sentient robot who is who-knows-how-many-years-old, is the closest thing I can remember to having as a home. Yes, the others are great, and I care about them. And if I'm honest with myself I see them as family too, though they probably don't. I'm just some emo hot-shot who gets angry a lot. I swallow back a lump in my throat. This really wasn't the time to dwell on my insecurities.

Red and I were having issues. Not Voltron-malfunctioning issues, or else Shiro and Allura would have stepped in already. It felt like there was a wall between me and Red now. And it hurt. It was only a few months ago that I found her, and I'd grown so used to hearing her in the back of my head-reassuring purrs, snorts of amusement, and growls, to get me back when my anxiety spiked too high. Now it was muted. It was still there, but…..it felt like she was tired. Like she was giving up on something. Probably me. Of course it was my fault. It always was.

I loved being around the others, Hunk and his sweet innocent smiles and constant hugs, Pidge and her little evil smirks and witty banter, Shiro's constant calm presence and parental stability, Coran's insane stories and whimsical nonsense that can make anyone laugh, Allura's tough love and steady energy somehow keeping us all coherent. And Lance and his stupid jokes when they feel down, and his grin when he makes them laugh, and his homesickness that makes me want to hug him and fix everything. But I was pulling away. It wasn't just because of Lance, it wasn't anything in particular that I could think of. It felt like something I couldn't fix.

It was my fault. I knew the problem. I knew what needed to happen, but, somehow...I couldn't fix it. Maybe it wasn't something that could be fixed. Everyone else was so natural on the team. They each added something positive. All I ever did was cause problems. I was only here because they needed a red paladin-and why oh why did Allura choose me-and somehow Red accepted me. Now is a time when I could really use Red-I'm not sure why Allura didn't let me bring her along in the first place-but I don't have her now, and something inside my chest clenches again. I tune in again and see that we are about to land, I breathe in, and carefully shove my anxiety away to the back of my mind. Like always. Let's get this over with.

Lance Pov(pre-takeoff): I sit in Blue's cockpit waiting for Keith to show up. Bonding exercise here we come. After the incident in the storage room, I wasn't sure what to make of this….situation with Keith. It's been two weeks since then, and Allura finally got fed up with our awkwardness and intervened. I'm really glad she did, because Keith and I really need some time together, without training and Pidge's cameras breathing down our necks, to talk this out.

I've liked Keith for a while. Might have had a crush on him at the Garrison even, though that got really entangled with our rivalry, so it was kind of hard to tell sometimes. Though I always figured he would have no interest-for many reasons, though the top ones being, we're guys and he's probably as straight as I am Bi, and he'd never see me as worth his time. In more recent weeks though, I've noticed little ticks about him. The tiny smiles he gets when everyone is actually getting along peacefully for once. His laughter at me and Hunk's stupid antics, real and genuine and childish. The glances he sends to my back when he seems to think I can't see his eyes moving in the reflection of the windows.

Made me start reconsidering my chances. Then that almost kiss in the storage room….

What bothered me the most, wasn't the fact that he had run, or even the awkwardness between us now. It was the look of absolute terror on his face when he realized what we were doing. Had I read it all wrong? But, ok, even if he didn't like me-or did, and had only just realized it or something-that shouldn't have provoked fear. Not like that.

It made me start mulling over every detail of physical contact I could remember any of the crew having with him. Yes, he was always pretty stiff about it, but never afraid. Keith and afraid just didn't go together. Then in the last two weeks I really noticed it. The little flinches, the sad shadow in his eyes for just a second that accompanies the cute team bonding moments, the fingers twitching around his arms, and arms pulling tighter against himself-crossed against his chest. I just didn't know why. Was I that blind? Had it been there all along? Were we all just really stupid? Or was Keith finally hitting his breaking point?

All of us had, at some point. We were homesick. We didn't sign up for the whole "Defenders of the Universe" thing. We were just kids who wanted our families. Me, Hunk, and Pidge had already dealt with our (first) major homesickness battle. I wonder if Keith was just hitting his…..What was home to Keith? That little shack in the middle of nowhere? What about his family, I can't remember him ever talking about them. Does he have a family?

I took one look at Keith's face when he entered the cockpit, the shadows were there heavier than ever. Blue whined a little in my head, her concern for the red paladin washing over me in anxious waves. I thought about the "mission" details that Allura had given me. I'm not gonna tell him. Not yet anyways.

Mentally, I ask Blue to help me with Keith, see if she could find something I could use to help fix-whatever the hell this was. Because I know, and I think Allura does too, if this "mission" is any clue, that Keith isn't just pulling away from me. He's pulling away from all of us. Blue said something, which she probably shouldn't have, but it was helpful either way. Red was worried about Keith. That alone was enough to set off about half a dozen alarm bells in my head. Then she said that Keith was distancing himself from her. That set off another series of alarms, worse than before. Keith loved Red. All of us loved our lions, but Keith and Red were different than the rest of us. Our lions treated us like partners-or gossip partners in my case, though I'm not sure it's really gossip if the "news" is ten thousand years old and Altean. But Red treated Keith like her son, like her cub more than her paladin. It made me wonder about Keiths mom on earth, and what his relationship was like with her.

Blue agrees instantly, a worried buzzing of energy that reminded me of a cat flicking its tail greeted my head.

I spend the flight watching the monitors in silence, and listening to Blue's subtle readings of the other paladin. If her whines of worry in the back of my head weren't enough, the tiny, almost unheard hitch of breath behind me seals it 'I am so glad Allura gave us a fake mission.' I thought.

Keith was at his breaking point. And for whatever reason, his way of dealing with it seemed to be to ignore it. I glanced back at him briefly, his head was turned to face the window, staring blankly at the stars flashing by, and looking for all the world like a kid who really, really needs a hug. I turn back to the front before he notices, if he's aware of anything at all. Blue sends me another worrying message. He's hurting. Not physically, or I would have brought us to a screeching halt, and hauled his ass back to the healing pod. No, he's hurting emotionally.

My mind is whirling with a thousand possible reasons why, when another, softer, and just as concerned message interrupts. He's lonely. That would have been enough to make me lose the controls, had Blue not been auto-piloting for a while now. Lonely?

I wanted to kick myself. Fuck. Of course that's what it was, I groaned mentally. I'm so stupid. I had half a mind to unbuckle myself and pull Keith into a massive hug, but I kind of figured that would get me an emotional and angry Keith, and an irritated Blue. So I resolved to wait until we land and settle into our arrangements.

That explains everything. He's always there for team bonding, always a part of it, but now that I really think about it, he's never really been included in much of the affection part. Verbally, yes, but physically? Hunk will sometimes pull him in for a rare hug (for Keith) after a mission gone well, or a particularly close incident. Pidge will sometimes fling herself to his shoulders when frightened, or give him a friendly shove during one of their "witty comebacks battles". And Shiro's pat on the shoulder were normal for everyone after a mission gone well. But besides those? And so many other times. Game night, it was always me, Hunk, and Pidge. Shiro sits on the couch to make sure we don't start actually brawling. Something that has happened more than once. But Keith? Always training. There were so many others too….we had always been ignoring it. It was Keith. Keith trained. That was normal.

I resisted the heavy urge to smash my head against the control panel. This won't solve everything. But maybe if I can find the root of what the hell is keeping Keith from joining in, aside from our own stupidity and blindness, I might be able to make a fair start.