The shout out went wrong.
On a rainy Friday night, when you were exhausted from a hard week at work, and you were looking forward to winding down at the weekend, a doctor was required to help at a collapsed building entrapment; a collapsed building that wasn't quite done collapsing.
You and the paramedic team had arrived a good ten minutes ago, the boy who was trapped had been calmed and had even laughed at a few of your corny jokes. A few corny jokes that had once been told to you by your older brother.
The building had started groaning again, and Iain warns you and Jez that you have to hurry.
But hurrying wasn't an option, and the rest of the building comes down on top of all of you.
Ethan…
Did somebody say your name? You're not sure, but you vaguely remember through the darkness that thinking you hear somebody saying your name is a sign of a healthy mind.
It's dark and cold an-
You wake briefly as you're lifted from the rubble and placed onto a trolley.
You see Jez, who must've been able to dig himself out, treating others who were caught in the fall of the building.
He smiles, relieved, when he sees you.
You also see Iain getting his head patched up in the swathing blue lights, and it occurs to you that this is what you're awake for – to check that the two people you went in with have managed to come back out with you – and you face the dark again.
You wake again with a bump as you're unloaded from the ambulance, and the first face you see is Mickey's – now Jez's petrified husband – who begs to know where Jez is. You and Mickey made your peace years ago, and you even attended their wedding as a happily congratulatory guest. You assure him through a throat like sandpaper and a voice like a frog's that Jez is okay. He thanks you with a shaky smile and tells you to focus on getting through your own injuries.
As you burst through the doors, a buzz of activity – stats, medical terms and orders – goes straight over your head. The darkness returns, and you leave as silently as it came.
Ethan…
The voice is your brother's and you let it pull you out and away…
"Okay, Dr. Hardy, let's get you stabilised, shall we?" The voice belongs to Mrs. Beauchamp, and is a stark contrast to that of your brother's, and a veil settles between you and him.
"C-Cal?" Your voice jumps from your throat, and earns a concerned glance from your colleagues.
"Ethan?" That's Charlie. He looks at you with worry and you vaguely know it's because it must be distressing to hear someone who is near death say the name of a dead loved one.
Ethan…
And the darkness returns quicker than ever.
The rush of voices and the long droning beep fades into the silence, and Caleb stands before you, smiling.
"Hey, Nibbles, long time no see."
Tears, hot and thick, the kind that have been gathering for ages, spill from your eyes.
His smile is sad but so so warm, and he says," I think it's about time you came with me."
And he opens his arms and you rush forwards a-
"-nd he's back with us." Connie says, fingers against your neck, checking your pulse.
"Okay," She continues," can we get that bleed seen to please? And somebody check his leg, too. We also need-"
Your hand lands on her arm, stopping her.
"No." You croak," It's okay. It's time for me to go."
She stares, and Charlie stutters to find something to say.
You turn to him and smile," It's time for me to join him, wherever that may be."
Charlie is visibly devastated, but he nods grimly.
In the next half an hour, you are pumped with pain relief as you sign a DNR.
When the time comes, half of your colleagues are crammed into Resus, somber and even crying.
You smile at the room in general and say," Thank you…"
And the darkness closes like a final curtain.
Cal seems more real this time. He takes you into his arms, both of you crying from the relief of it.
"I've missed you."
"Not more than I've missed you, little brother."