Morty It's Science Morty, by Dickfart

"Morty-blech-it's science Morty look around you Morty everywhere you look Morty there are wonders to behold Morty I mean look at this channel Morty we can watch Jerry get plowed in the ass by George Clooney Morty gosh Morty if Jerry got plowed in the ass by George Clooney instead of your mom then you wouldn't have been born Morty and then the show would just be called Rick and not Rick and Morty are you listening to me Morty you don't seem like you're listening to me Morty once I was to the planet Fapadoodledorf Morty and snorted-belch-some krystal neth Morty which is like crystal meth Morty but it doesn't turn me into white trash Morty you ever watch Breaking Bad Morty because let me tell you Morty I could have done a much better job than Heisenberg Morty you know how I know Morty because I've done it Morty I cooked and sold meth while I was still married to Beth's mom Morty I know I was married Morty isn't that weird Morty love is stupid Morty stop falling asleep Morty you're missing all the science around you Morty."

"Rick, it's three in the morning. Go to bed," said Morty, covering his head with his pillow.

"Sleep is for the weak Morty they tell you that you need eight hours of sleep per night but that's a lie Morty you know how I know that Morty because it's what the government said Morty you should never trust the government Morty you know how Beth and Jerry go out and vote every four years Morty well they waste their time Morty corporations have bought and sold America a long time ago Morty and every sack of shit that becomes president is the same Morty they're all out to kill every-barp-poor person in the country Morty because they think poor people are useless Morty but they're the government Morty and no one is more useless than the government Morty remember when we Cronenberged your former dimension Morty good times Morty they'll be saying fuck yeah Morty Rick and Morty hundred years double u double u dot hundred years Rick and Morty dot com slash double u double you adventures Rick and Morty Rick and Morty hundred years Rick and Morty."

"Aww geez, Rick. I'd really rather be sleeping. I might dream about Jessica's breasts again."

"No can do Morty I'm old Morty I-burp-I could die any minute Morty you don't understand how old I am Morty I can tell you about the exact year I was born Morty it all happened when..."

Morty fell asleep anyway, but rather than dreaming about Jessica's breasts, he dreamed about Rick talking forever instead.

The End