Author's Note: I woke up a few days ago with this scene almost completely fully formed in my head and I couldn't stop thinking about it. Fingers crossed this is the opening to s5 ;)

We Can't

"Jean, there's something I have to ask you."

She turned to look at him, both their faces still flushed from their passionate kiss in the drive. Jean swallowed hard. She'd already allowed too much to occur today, already given in to her own foolish feelings far too much. "No," she said, shaking her head. "Come inside," she insisted.

Lucien followed her into the house. He was grinning wildly, unable to contain his joy at getting things back to the way they were supposed to be.

Jean turned back to face him as soon as the door closed behind them. He was shocked to see anger and unshed tears in her eyes. "Jean, what's the matter?"

"We can't do this." Her voice was cold.

He blinked at her, confused. "But just now in the drive…Jean, you can't tell me that kiss wasn't wonderful. After so long? We're free now!"

"No, we aren't. You aren't. That is your wife that just left here. I held onto you during all of this when I shouldn't have. It was selfish of me. I was foolish to think I had any sort of claim over you."

"You do! Jean, you have my heart. Much more than Mei Lin ever did. She and I…that was the past. And it's over now, I swear to you. We discussed it. She's going to stay in Hong Kong with Li. And nothing about that has changed how you and I feel about each other."

"Oh yes it has. Your wife showed up back from the dead. I was the other woman. As if I didn't already feel like a harlot already…"

"What are you on about?" he asked incredulously. "You are the most upstanding woman I've ever seen!"

"You still don't understand, do you? Since the day you moved here, everyone has assumed you've been having your way with me. Why do you think I was so afraid to love you? I tried to move to Adelaide because I was too ashamed of my feelings for you! But you…you just wouldn't let me go. I was too weak to resist. Being with you made me so happy. But I shouldn't have allowed it. I should have been stronger. I…" Jean trailed off. Her sobs had overtaken her words.

Lucien didn't know what to say. He, too, was overwhelmed by emotion. He hadn't really understood how she'd suffered. How she still suffered. And how much she had sacrificed in order to love him. He had been so consumed by his love for her that he didn't even recognize that she loved him just as much. Perhaps more. He was so lucky and he didn't even know.

Unable to convey it any other way, Lucien took two strides toward her and kissed her hard on the mouth. She still cried and tried to push him away. "No, no, we can't!" she insisted, her voice muffled by his kiss.

He held her tight by the arms. "To hell with what anyone says. Jean, I love you. And I won't let anyone or anything come between us again. Not even you and your damned morals."

Jean released some of the tension in her body. She couldn't quite stop crying yet. But she leaned in and rested her cheek on his chest, allowing him to quietly soothe her. If nothing else, she could hold onto him just for now.