A/N: I don't own Avatar: The Last Airbender
Zuko stared at Katara in disbelief as she walked away from the campfire. He couldn't help but think that her attitude was his fault. He knew she hated him, but couldn't she have been more cordial about it? He didn't treat her any differently from how he treated the others, but for some reason, she seemed to take everything personally.
"Is she always like this?" Zuko asked once Katara was out of earshot.
"Pretty much," replied Toph.
"Sometimes," Sokka added.
"Not really," said Aang.
Well, if that's not ambiguous, I don't know what is.
Zuko aimed his hands towards the darkening sky. "I don't get it. You guys seem fine with me. But if she holds some sort of grudge against me, then shouldn't you, too? Why aren't you all furious with me like she is? I've attacked you all fairly equally." He glanced at Toph. "Well, except for you. You're newer."
Toph shrugged. "Beats me. Maybe it's this thing she has with new people joining the group. She and I would butt heads a lot when I joined. Couldn't get along at all." She dug her toes into the soft dirt. "But look at us now. Sure, we're not exactly best friends, but we've been through tough times together, so we've bonded that way."
Sokka spoke with a mouthful of fish, "It will probably just take time. I wouldn't worry about it."
"If you say so," Zuko said, not totally convinced. There had to be some other way. Time was not a luxury they could afford. Sozin's Comet was fast approaching, and he had to earn each of their trusts before the Fire Nation could stake its claim on the world.
The group sat in relative quiet, listening to the gentle crackle of the campfire.
After a short while, Aang spoke up. "Zuko?"
Zuko simply looked at Aang in ackowledgement.
"What happened between you and Katara in Ba Sing Se? In the cave?" Aang asked.
The question was innocent, yet it tore at Zuko. The answer came to him almost immediately.
"Regret," Zuko replied. He realized the answer probably wasn't very informative, so he began to clarify. "When I was thrown into the cave, she went on a little rant on why she hated me and the Fire Nation, and how I was using her as bait to catch you. In reality, I was only there because my sister threw me in there." Zuko looked at the group. They were intently listening. Do they not already know the story? Did Katara not tell them? He sighed and looked down at his feet, studying the clasps on his shoes. The fire in front of him gave him a welcome warmth. "When Katara was done ranting, then things got personal. She talked about her mother, that the Fire Nation took her away. I didn't know what to say to that, so I just said 'I'm sorry. That's something we have in common.'"
"They took your mother away, too?" Sokka asked. "What happened to her?"
Zuko didn't want to think about losing his mother. He wanted to forget it all ever happened. "They did, but that's a story for another time," he simply replied. "Anyway, then we got talking about my scar being a representation of the Fire Nation to her. She seemed sympathetic; she even offered to use her fancy spirit water to heal it." He purposefully left out the part with her touching his face, when he had felt most vulnerable.
"That sounds like something she would do," Aang piped in.
Zuko looked up at him. "Yes, but if she had used it on me instead of on you, you wouldn't have survived Azula's lightning, and the Fire Nation would have already won." He could see the realization in each of their faces. He was suddenly grateful he still had his scar. Well that's a first.
"Do you think it would have worked? Healed the scar, I mean?" Sokka wondered out loud.
"I don't know. My impression was scars couldn't be healed, but she thought it might work," Zuko recalled. He paused for a bit. "We had some sort of unspoken trust down there. I could tell she was opening up to me, and I to her. I didn't expect that from her. It was honestly pretty strange. That trust didn't last, of course. It was then that Aang and Iroh found us."
"Then you turned against Iroh and sided with Azula," Aang finished the story.
Zuko nodded. "Bingo. That makes three people I regret betraying in that cave: you, Iroh, and Katara."
"I bet that's why she's having a hard time accepting you into the group," Aang replied. "You betrayed whatever trust she had in you."
"That would make sense. How do I fix that?" Zuko asked.
"You could try talking to her," Toph finally spoke up. "I mean, I believe you. Maybe she will, too."
Zuko raised his eyebrows, quizzical. "You mean right now?"
"Wouldn't hurt to try," Sokka added, standing up. "Come on, I'll show you which room she's in."
Zuko was hesitant to take up his offer. It was true that it wouldn't hurt to try. His situation couldn't get much worse; Katara already distrusted and loathed him. He stood up and brushed dirt off of his trousers. "I guess it's worth a shot."
Sokka led Zuko around various hallways and corners in the stone temple. It was dark now, but the moon was shining light through windows that lined the halls. Zuko got more apprehensive at every step. He didn't know what to say to Katara that would convince her to believe he'd changed. He racked his brain for what to say, but his thoughts were fleeting, and he couldn't focus. His mind seemed to get erased at every second. At last, Sokka brought him around a corner and stopped, pointing at the end of the hall.
"Her room is at the very end." Sokka turned on his foot and started walking in the direction they came. "Good luck. You'll need it."
Zuko was nowhere near ready to talk to Katara, but he nodded and forced his legs to move towards her door. He still had no words prepared. He just hoped the right words would come to him in the moment, and he would say whatever came to his heart.
He arrived at her room. Well, here goes nothing. He gently knocked on the door.
"Can I help you?" Katara huffed. The question was asked so flatly, it sounded rhetorical. She was in no mood to see this face at her door. She could almost feel the disdain coursing through her veins.
"Can I talk to you?" Zuko asked.
She crossed her arms. "You're already doing that. What do you want?"
"I want to apologize for what happened in Ba Sing Se."
Strangely, she was intrigued enough to hear him out. "Oh?"
"Siding with Azula was both the hardest and stupidest decision I've ever made. It's my biggest regret - even bigger than being banished. I just thought you should know that."
He looked right into her eyes, and for some reason, she couldn't take her eyes off of him. He was leaning against the doorway, arms down, hands open. Well, he definitely doesn't seem like a threat. And here she was, standing defensively with her arms crossed, glaring so intently that she hoped he would feel intimidated enough to go away.
Katara felt her foot repeatedly tap the stony ground underneath her. Far from a nervous tick, her foot tap was a way to get some pent up energy out of her. For a few grudgingly long seconds, the tapping was the only sound in the air. Zuko remained looking at her, expecting a response. She didn't know how to react to his confession. She hated that he was speaking so gently to her, yet she was too tired to fight with him. Katara wanted to believe he was being sincere - that he had put his past behind him and truly regretted his actions. But in her heart, she knew that he still struggled to do the right thing. The road to becoming allies was going to be a very long one. Even so, she realized that being angry with Zuko all the time wouldn't solve anything, even if she didn't want him around.
Katara huffed yet again, this time in resignation. "Apology accepted."
His face seemed to soften. "Thank you. Can..." he paused. "Can I ever be forgiven?"
"No," Katara shook her head. "Not today, anyway. It's still too soon."
"I understand." He turned on his heel to face the doorframe. "Good night, then," he said as he vanished down the hall.
He was gone before Katara could respond. She closed the door and turned around, leaning against it. That sly dog, trying to be all friendly. "Good night"? Only friends and family say that to each other. And he is definitely not at that level.
She walked over to her bed, sliding off her shoes and untying her hair in the process. She climbed into the blankets and tried to go to sleep, but couldn't get Zuko out of her mind. She didn't think anyone could change temperaments so quickly and so dramatically. And yet, as often as she had seen him in he past two days, he seemed very non-coercive and non-aggressive. He's gotten suspiciously soft. Either he's good at faking it, or he's actually changed. That facade can only last for so long. Only time will tell if he's honestly a better person now.
As much as she hated it, thinking about Zuko was a necessary evil for Katara. He was in the group now, and she had to learn to work with him. Regardless, she refused to let her guard down. He may have changed, but he's still very capable of taking us out. I'll only forgive him if he can prove to me that he won't hurt any of my friends, especially Aang. He was already the source of too much grief. She made a promise with herself that she wouldn't start trusting him until she was done recovering from all the pain he and his nation had caused her.
She was nowhere near ready to forgive him.