Hello there friends! Long time no see, with our move to another country and the change of jobs there was simply no time for me to sit and write. However, I am now established and inspired and I'm excited to present you guys with this work in progress.

This is a little something that was running through my mind as inspiration. As always SuccubusShinobi has had some influence on this by playing pretty good music while I write. I want to thank my readers who will take the time to read this. I am not giving up on other stories, but I am aware that I have not written in almost 6 months and I don't want established works to suffer my rustiness. I hope you all enjoy this work I am about to put out, I am enjoying writing it and expect to have a chapter a week at the latest.

Disclaimer: The characters portrayed in this story belong to their rightful creators while the situations and storyline are solely mine.

Reflections of You

Chapter 01: Winter Bird

The warmth of the fire did nothing for the chill in my bones or in my soul. It was still that all-consuming numbness that took my breath away at the times I tried to crawl out of this daze. With a sigh I brought the cold feel of the glass to my lips as the deep shades of bourbon hit my tongue making my throat burn. I could feel the way my body was melting into this plush tall chair in front of the chimney and I knew I would disappoint Dyson once more. I pinched the bridge of my nose with regret as I let of the air in my lungs sullenly at the thought of the man who had been so patient with me.

The thought was like a bucket of ice water chilling my veins and seeping deeper into my soul as I cringed. The fact was that there was a resolute, absolute reason why I couldn't just give Dyson the chance and that reason was unfathomable to me at this point. A thought so deep and painful I had to bury it away deeper even than the untimely death of my Grandfather and Mother at the hands of my Father so many years ago.

Thinking about the past, how it played out and the situations that unfolded was making me anxious to the point of restlessness so I stood quicker than I probably should have and threw the black leather jacket on over my skin tight black tank top. I finished my drink in one swift gulp and grabbed the bottle while as if in a trance my feet carried me out the door and into the dark city. I shook my head one last time to push away the face in my head within my memories and looking both ways I decided which way to go as I always did now-a-days; on a whim.

The air was cold against my skin and I welcomed it as the old friend it was. I felt the phone vibrating in my pocket, but ignored it just the same. I didn't want to hear Dyson's voice warped with pity and pain. My Grandfather would probably be ashamed at the whirlwind of emotions I was putting Dyson through, but I couldn't pull myself together no matter how much time had passed. Everyone was so sure that Dyson and I would be with each other in the long run, after….

I grabbed my chest at the pain of her memory as it took my breath away like it always did. I had to lean against a wall to catch my bearings and yet wave after wave of memories, moments and laughter from when I was the happiest hit me crippling my every move. I was a mess, I knew it and yet I couldn't do anything about it. Tears ran down my face as I gasped for breath remembering how she smelled every night in my arms before Morpheus took me in his. The years that had gone by were a mere ghost of time where I endlessly looked for ways to entertain my mind away from my aching heart. As I looked for solace in the shadows of the snow falling while the tears felt frozen in my face, the air I breathed was a mere cloud of white out of my lips. I needed to get home, but was it home anymore even? It was a mere hotel room, a mini fridge and my mind. No home is where your heart is cold as ice.

The smile formed on my lips between the world of dreams and the real one. With an adventurous feeling my eyes opened and I took the dull shine of morning light. I knew she loved waking up early enough to have her coffee and our time to relax before going to work and I had slowly but surely adjusted to her schedule. I stretched my naked body deliciously, being careful not to stir the bed much so I could appreciate her beauty without the mar that stress brought onto her physique. I knew she was tired of perpetually living in the unknown but I tried my best to keep her grounded to the now as I was. There was no room to look forward and I could live with that.

The sheets over me were soft and her body next to mine was warm and inviting, tempting me to wake her up in the most delicious way. With a mischievous smile blissfulness filled me reinvigorating my every fibre as I pressed my nose against the naked soft skin in front of me. I could make out this scent even in the filthiest conditions. Like a fine wine that had been drank so many times it was now part of you, unmistakable. I basked in the feeling of the soft skin beneath my digits as I ran the tips of my fingers along the curves of her collarbone and clavicle. I could see the Goosebumps rise along my lover's skin and my smile grew while I could hear the deep pleasant hum coming from her lips. My lips found her shoulder as I tucked her golden locks behind her ear appreciating every second with the woman. I could feel her stirring and I was more than ready this time. This was my favourite part of the day, when I could see her gorgeous face wake up to my eyes staring into hers. It was magical, it was bliss and as her shoulder dipped and her face started to turn I felt my heartbeat quicken and my breath leave me momentarily.

Everything was off. It was dark in the room now and the bed was cold while the sheets rubbed harshly against my body. I stifled a sob as I blinked repeatedly trying not to lose the memory of this dream that now escaped me. My hands fell to my face as I covered my eyes and cried unabashedly, the way you allow yourself when no one is watching. I tried not to wail, I had been kicked out of other hotels over that and for now I didn't want to move. Or did I?

The thought made my heart ache as it always did when I considered it but there was nothing to be done any more in this city. I had loved and I had lost in this city and even if I wanted to stay for the sake of holding on to hope; who was I really kidding? I couldn't shake off the melancholy out of my soul and the weight of the loss was too much to take anymore. Maybe I could convince someone to keep me posted if something changed, but after so many years, I highly doubted anything would change anymore. I looked around the darkened room and through the slight opening in the curtains where the light shone from it illuminated the bottles strewn around. I had been drinking heavier than ever before especially after the last fight with Dyson, but in the end it didn't take the pain away. Ironically I now understood more of Dyson than I ever did and yet I could not give him my all like I should've been able to.

While my heart pounded as heavily as my head I got up in frenzy and started packing my stuff haphazardly into a duffel bag. I tugged into the corner between the mini bar and the counter and pulled out a zip-lock full of different ID cards from different places. I had been planning this for a very long time, but the guilt and the hope wouldn't let me move forward. In this moment though, between dreams, dodging phone calls and the fear that I was slowly becoming an alcoholic I had to leave immediately.

The sun was warm on my back and I took in the salty air lingering in the road I was on. I could almost taste the salt and sand as the sun baked my skin a deeper tan than it already was and I thanked the heavens for my choice of a spaghetti strap tank and booty shorts. My hair was loose and unruly and it had grown out to my shoulder blades at this point, which I was glad for since I had missed it.

Truth was that since I had taken off from the city I had gone through great lengths to reinvent myself. Shortly after I had taken the road, I had cut my hair pretty short and spunky. It had been a split second decision, the first of many, and in hindsight I should've probably held off on that one. I had been able to keep jobs here and there, I had never needed to make money as I went through life as a Succubus but I needed the work to clear my mind. So far it had worked and after being somewhere rural but colder, another city and a desert, I thought it was time to try the sand and the salty water I had never seen before.

So far the view had been nothing short of amazing as the highway made way to the waterside black top. I couldn't understand how it had taken me this long to get here, but I was glad I was here now. There was something about the ocean that called to me in ways that I was aloof to. I drew in a deep happy sigh and pressed the gas pedal further as the GPS blurted out that my destination was close by.

When I pulled into the sandy driveway and the slightly roofed entrance my eyes lit up. I immediately loved the place and I wasn't even inside yet. The house was set a mere 10 steps from the formation of rocks that led to the crystalline water. I sighed longingly knowing for a fact this would've been a perfect place for the both of us. With a bitter smile I shook the thoughts out of my head and hopped off the red door-less Jeep I had been calling mine recently.

I still missed the woman that owned my heart, there was no denying that, but I was also not drowning in despair like I was in the city. The reality was that in the city there was countless places and people that reminded me of a life I had lost. As much as I had loved the gang and Dyson, Mark and Vex I could not hold the same life with them without her as I did with her. Out here on the road, I had fond memories to think of but I also had lots of time to think ahead and wonder what the next place would bring me. I wouldn't deny, I was longing for somewhere to call home by now, but that's what I hoped this place would bring. If not, on to the next one, a tourist just passing by trying to have fun.

I got out of the car noting there was no one else in the premises beside myself. I thought I was probably early and decided to scope the place out. I rounded the spacious house and found the beach at the back where a patio gave way to a stone path to where I assumed was the water. The sun felt nice and the sound of the waves was a welcomed lull to my chaotic thoughts. I could feel many of the things troubling me melting away as the ocean wrapped around me with its sound while I tasted the salt in my mouth from the air.

"Miss McCorrigan?" I jumped slightly from the voice as I turned and a well-dressed man was standing before me. I smiled to cover my blunder but he noticed it himself. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you."

"It's alright, I was not aware you were here." I noted with a smile.

"I ran a little late, I deeply apologize" the man smiled at me and I waved him off with a smile. "Thanks I'll open it up so you can see the inside."

As the man opened the door I took a moment to regard him. He was tall, dark, and handsome and perhaps some years ago I would've, but not now. I was fed from the last nomad Fae I crossed and he had assured me there was a settlement here nearby where I could seek refuge and sustainability. I was still not down to be aligned but word traveled far of the feats I had done in the city, being The Blood King's granddaughter opened you a lot of new doors.

"This one just hit the market, I don't think it'll be available for long… I-" he tried as we walked inside.

"I'll take it!" I interrupted him when I looked inside. "Why don't you go grab the contract and I'll make myself at home?"

The man looked flabbergasted for a moment before I gave him a wide smile.

"For real, Darwin… it was Darwin wasn't it?" I asked to make sure as he nodded "Then yes, Darwin go for it and grab the contract, I want it."

The man smiled and all but ran to his car. This was probably the easiest sale he had ever done, but I wanted this place hands down. The outside was an eggshell shade of white siding with a blue front door complete with a screen door as well. Once inside the kitchen was to my left but it was mostly open concept and I could practically see the whole house. The kitchen was white with white cabinets, brown and white tiling and stainless steel appliances. As I walked into the dining room just before the kitchen I ran my finger down the brown table and chairs that were there suggesting the house had been set up to entertain. That gave way into the living room which was tremendously spacious holding a small desk, a couple of couches, and armchairs. However what enticed me into the sell was the chimney in the middle of the back wall of this room. I missed Trick's chimney where I would sit for hours and perhaps this one would do until I could return to the former.

Once the tedious paperwork was out of the way and I had dispatched Darwin out of sight I decided it was a good time as any to unpack. There wasn't really much to unpack in the first place but two trips to the Jeep were needed. I had set my bags by the front door before taking off my shoes at the landing wanting to explore. It wasn't huge, but that was part of the charm it possessed and I liked it very much. The bright colours and lights coming from the huge bay windows were just making me calmer by the second.

Grateful that the realtor company was excellent I had found complimentary map of the town I now resided in. I had enough money that I didn't need to find the next job anytime soon, so that was not something I was looking in here for. I had found a few places of interest in the map and thought it'd be a great try so I made a mental picture of it in case I wanted to visit later time. With that I noted where the local diner and grocery store were and decided to give them a visit today to finish getting settled. As I looked around my new house I smiled fondly. I felt good here as if the thought of her being here with me was enough to help heal my soul. In a moment before I set out to unpack I wondered if this would be the year I'd be able to utter her name again.

"Why are you still holding on to this Bo? It's impossible! She's been gone for 60 years, she was 42 when she left. I highly doubt there's a 102 year old Lauren out there still pinning for you. I'm sorry to be this harsh but you need to wake up and move on!" Dyson exclaimed as he paced the room in frustration and my jaw tightened at his words.

"Dyson I didn't ask you to wait on my every beck and call, there's plenty of women out there that can take your dick if that's what you want." I replied tensely not wanting to deal with this as I reached into my coat and fished out my flask taking a swig.

"It's not even about that anymore Bo!" Dyson huffed angrily. "I couldn't care less if we try it again for the millionth time or not, but this way that you're living your life is destructive. You are drinking yourself away and just going through life in a fog and with Mackenzie calling today…" Dyson started but I shook my head at the other stab in my heart that had just been created recently.

"I can't have her visit Dyson, it's too soon and she looks exactly like her late Mother." I cringed as he groaned frustrated.

"Because she IS her mother's daughter Bo. She's spunky and lively and brave like her and she misses her aunt, she wants to see you and I for one think you're being incredibly selfish." Dyson argued but I wasn't having it.

"No Dyson, I can't see her anytime soon, she's safe with Dagny and that's how it should stay." I admitted bitterly as he huffed in anger.

"Isabeu… Lauren left, she left you and she never looked back and you need to cope with that- -"

The slap that crossed his face reverberated through the room and the painful look that crossed his eyes etched into the box of regrets I seemed to be collecting.

"Don't fucking talk about her like you know what happened." I hissed before walking out of the room the last time I saw Dyson.

I stared at the crashing waves as the sound rolled through the night and crashed into my being taking away the bitter memories that my past seemed to rehash. The double French doors at the back of the master bedroom were open to reveal the amazing view and a path to the ocean. It was a treat to live in such a place and I was grateful for my longevity giving me the opportunity to see so much of the beauty in this world. After my day out in the town buying groceries I had decided I liked the distance from my house to the hub, it was far enough to escape, but close enough to join the town for anything I'd need.

The vibe had seemed invigorating in town and all the young people were buzzing with the excitement of a Friday night at the local watering hole. I had my reservations on where to go, but after my dinner and a hot shower the more I stared at the waves in the darkness of twilight the more I felt like exploring the town's entertainment.

With my mind set I picked out a decent outfit and applied my dark smoky makeup, deciding that my hair was better out of my face I pinned it back with a bobby pin. I was nervous and yet excited at what the night could bring. I knew I shouldn't have but I stared at my old phone which I hadn't turned on for a couple of years now. I wondered who of my old life was looking for me or not. I wanted to grab it and turn it on, and as the anxiety of the possibilities enveloped me I took one last shaky breath grabbing my Jeep keys and walking away into the night.

I stood in front of the loud and noisy place; it seemed that there was a rave or an industrial fetish party of sorts going on. It looked to be an abandoned factory of or something of the like that had been turned into a club at the outskirts of town. I was lured here by the heavy bass and the cloister of Fae I could sense here. As I walked in I was met by chains and a stairwell going upwards in the industrial club that was loitered by all sorts of couples (and more than couples) making out and beyond. Unwillingly my eyes flashed blue at the sensory stimulation I was receiving as I donned my shades in case the humans here were not drunk enough and made my way to what looked to be the bar. There a black guy with a sexy back smiled at me wanting my order. He was Fae, that much I knew, and I had to resist the urge to pull my shades down and smile coyly. I remained neutral deciding I wanted to get to see the place around before any trouble got to me as I sipped the beer I had asked for contently looking at the dance floor.

The sexual energy from the bodies grinding against each other, dripping in sweat and swaying to the music was exactly what I needed right now. I felt myself melt with the crowd after a few songs and not long after I was in full blown dance mode. Before I knew it this blonde was dancing with me almost entranced and I decided that tonight I was gonna have fun no matter what.

When I awoke there was a rose on the vacant pillow beside me. I chuckled at the notion of romanticizing a Succubus. I pushed the bitter memories away for another time and pushed myself to live in the now; laying on this bed with the Egyptian cotton sheets and the glow of a night of sexual healing. I felt like a drive and the distance between here and the nearest Fae compound would've provided just that. With plans set to see the beach along the way and a purpose to my day I stretched out in the soft bed admiring the way the light came in through the doors illuminating the walls with a beautiful blue hue reflecting the water beyond my walls. I felt like I was gonna like it here and I needed that.

After a shower and some coffee that I packed in a thermos I grabbed my sun glasses, my keys, and an apple. I had become much more of a better cook since my days in the crack shack, but still I preferred the coffee and snack route in the mornings. I smiled at the Jeep that had become mine in a card game. I had promised myself to win it fair and square without using my Succubus. I channelled my inner Kenzi and won the hand that got me the keys. A pang of longing hit me as I realized she would've loved the door-less, top-less vehicle that matched my lifestyle. The paint was glossy and cold underneath my fingertips, the red was a beautiful shade and it wasn't lost on me that she would've loved to ride in it with me. With a small smile I patted the right fender and nodded softly as I got into the Jeep to set off. I had found solace with the loss of my best friend within this trip and that was at least a small victory on in itself.

The pain of my old life was still there ever present yet I had found a way to push it aside, to let it mute and become background noise to deal with at a later time. I could not visit some things, but in the end I was making progress from the alcoholic mess I was becoming in the city. I cringed followed by a shudder knowing it had been a close call back then and with new purpose I turned my engine on and roared down the road towards the compound.

After the beach picnic stop I had taken, I had driven for about 45 minutes to an hour before I reached the compound. The guards at the gate were friendly as soon as I touched their hands. It seemed to be a light compound so I braced for a lecture at some point. After I parked a guard was waiting by the back of the Jeep.

"If you would please follow me." The guard mentioned and I simply obliged knowing there was not much else to do.

Silently we made our way down the compound as the guard showed me the way. We waited by huge green doors as the young man in uniform glanced at me admiringly from time to time. I wondered if he recognized me but I was almost certain he had. With a smile and a wave he led me to the main room and advised me to sit down. I followed orders while he took his leave giving me a chance to look around in such elaborate room.

As always the Elders had a taste for the exaggerated and this was no exception. I knew the reigning Ash in this area was pompous so I wanted to be in and be out. I had just come to establish my area of residence as my own domain. It was a courtesy I extended the Ash or Morrigan of the area I was staying in that time frame.

The room itself was full of a mixture of books and plants, with a fountain in the centre. I had heard that this particular leader was a Shifter like Dyson. When he came into the room he smiled and brushed the assistants away as he walked back to his seat.

"Isabeau McCorrigan, what a pleasure of having you by…. What can I do for you?" the Ash's voice was deep and resonating but it also held kindness.

"Thank you for seeing me Ash" I admitted with a curtsy. "I am just advising the local Fae government about my arrival into their domain to avoid any misunderstandings."

The Ash shot me a smile and nodded before he sat in the chair opposite to me. I could see the sun setting in the background as I smiled to myself at the thought of another night of fun.

"Very generous of you Bo, I heard from Darwin that you bought the property from the beach at the edge of town, so consider that your territory. We are honoured to have you in our community. Anything you need let me know and I'll personally see it done." He ended swiftly before kneeling and kissing my hand.

A bit weirded out by the informal goodbye I smiled awkwardly and nodded before turning and leaving the room. The same guard escorted me to my Jeep and then I was out of there. It felt weird being around mostly Fae again, living with humans had made it so that I wasn't used to my own kind again. I had always felt at home between humans but now with years of experience to hold it against it, I could see that their mortality was something hard for me to get over.

The night breeze was crisp and soothing compared to the scorching day we had. I had taken a long detour at the beach before arriving at the compound so I was glad I was heading home. I wanted to get changed and check out more of the town. It seemed like a lot of young people liked to come by and have a good time.

By the time I arrived home the breeze had turned slightly chilly and I was already pondering on what to wear. My night at The Quagmire last night had satisfied the Succubus in me but now I wanted to see what else was out there. The blonde last night had been invigorating but deep down I hoped that the only feelings between us was lust. After a quick refreshing shower and some deciding on the outfit I wore a pair of black leggings, a black long tank top and black leather boots with purple details. The night was breezy and cool so it would allow me to wear this without being stifling. I retouched and perfected my makeup before throwing on a purple light leather jacket that completed my look. With that I decided to hop in the Jeep and roll letting my hair fall and set with the breeze.

It wasn't half a block from where I had parked the Jeep when someone caught up with me. I chuckled and scoffed when I saw it was my companion from last night.

"Bo, I've been looking all over for you babes." The blonde insisted and I smiled incredulously.

"Nope, no… this ain't happening."

"What? We had a magical time together. After the party it was a true connection… the things you did with your tongue… and your flexi-"

"Shhhhh" I interrupted "Listen, we had a good time that was all."

I tried as best as I could to make the blonde understand as I meet the dark brown eyes. I shook my head one last time to get the point across and turned to start walking towards the music and the vibe from the place nearby. There were tons of young people going in and the mood was electric. I wondered if it was an 80's vibe from the way the crowd was dressed but I didn't mind, I liked the scene. I could've sworn I saw a familiar face in the crowd but I couldn't have been sure it wasn't my mind playing tricks on me. Before I could keep walking into the club to find out what awaited me, the blonde was pulling me towards him trying to change my mind.

"Bo! Bo!"

"I'm still walking Wes…"

"Come on Bo we still have a couple of hours, let's use it…"

"I AM using it" I chuckled at this pup following me around. "I have somewhere to be, see you around Wes have fun."

I turned without thinking much more of it, as I looked in what direction I had seen the familiar face go towards. I smiled shaking my head as I walked to the entrance with a goofy grin to calm my nerves. 'There's no way Bo' I told myself as my mind raced with conclusions. I had to stop imagining things and enjoy what Tuckers had to offer in the form of entertainment.

As I walked in the tunes of the 80's hit my ears, the place was full of pink and blue neon lights and people wearing outfits to fit into that era. It seemed like the bar had a theme and I somewhat liked that. It was a flashback for me and I'm sure most of these people that were here dressed like an 80's movie threw up on them had no idea how people lived back in that era. The bar was stainless steel and it felt like I had stepped into a time capsule with the décor of years long gone. The vibe was different from the place I had been to yesterday but it was still packed with energy and dancing. I made my way to the bar trying to keep my eyes from scanning the crowd. My sight scanned over the door where the blonde was still looking for me inside and my eyes rolled as I tried to take evasive manoeuvres.

There was an old school arcade attached to the club and as I passed it I scanned a couple of booths with tables and such. I caught myself looking back to make sure Wes had not located me yet as I tried to put the human down as gently as I could without using my Succubus. I liked this town, it had the right mix of Fae and human and it seemed the locals were not as uptight when it came to hanging out with the mere mortals that made life fun. Looking around for someone to use as a decoy from Wes my breath caught in my throat.

"Lauren." I whispered as a woman looked around in the booth sipping on a retro coke bottle.

She was aloof to my staring and I couldn't tear my eyes away. She looked completely different and there was no sign of recognition on her features. The darker dirty blonde hair was down her shoulders in a flat style she wore glasses now while a white stripped tee sat under a black leather jacket, jeans, boots and if I didn't know any better I could see tattoos poking from her neck. These were all good signs that this was not Lauren and I was mistaken here but I could swear the scent in this woman was exactly the same. The years that had passed had no mark or blemish on her features making my suspicions seem less likely. My eyes scanned her as my mind ran and my lips moved without thinking as well as my body and I took a seat next to the stranger that was so familiar.

"Whatever I say, go along with me." I assured as my heart raced as the woman stared at me in a shy manner and she scooted just as Wes reached us with a coy smile.

Looking every bit as smitten as he was before I talked to him outside Wes made a thumb towards the door with a suggestive chuckle. I rolled my eyes and turned my attention to him.

"Ok Wes, you're just pestering now…" I mentioned as he took a seat opposite to me and the striking woman.

"Listen Bo, last night you and I had the most amazing- -"

"Last night was last night, I need to talk to my friend here ok? I haven't seen her in a while. Wes she's sick, like 6 months to live sick."

"Five Actually…" the woman beside me chimed in making stare at her boldness as she held back a smile.

"Alright, alright… hey, sorry about…well you know…" the blonde man commented towards my new company and she nodded blushing.

I watched him leave painfully aware of how close this striking woman was to me. I mustered up the courage to put on my best charm and from the lack of recognition in the blonde's face, I gathered this was a blank slate that just looked like my Lauren. I would never mistake this aura but it was actually impossible for it to be my Doctor. So as much as I wanted to grab her, kiss her and tell her how much I loved her and missed her I withheld so I wouldn't startle this newcomer.

"Sorry about killing you, the whole 6 months thing—sorry 5… that was a nice touch, the 5 months!" I complimented her as she blushed.

"I'm good at thinking on my feet." She admitted as I chuckled.

"I'm Bo." I offered along with my hand as she smiled shifting her glasses up the bridge of my nose and took my hand.

I almost missed her name from the feeling that swept through me when we touched but I was lucky. It seemed this woman that looked, smelled and felt like Lauren called herself Andrea. I knew I should've called it a night and gone home. Andrea was only going to rehash old painful memories of the woman I loved, but I was a sadistic fuck it seemed and here I was pulling her towards the bar and ordering two Rum and Cokes in spite of her protest. When she grimaced at the drink I chuckled and offered something else but she shook her head. I took her in once more knowing that if I continued with this I was playing with fire.

"Woo" she exclaimed after taking her drink and I chuckled.

"Too strong?" I asked with a smirk and she shook her head looking at her glass with a smirk.

"I just hadn't had one in a while." She admitted and I nodded understanding.

"Are you from here?" I asked wanting to know more about this stranger but she shook her head.

"I'm a tourist, I'm spending some time here at the beach to clear my head." Andrea explained while I took in her features.

Every line, wrinkle, and beauty mark exactly as I remembered it on my lover was on this woman's face not a day older. It was uncanny and scary and yet I couldn't possibly pull away. I was like a moth to a flame, fascinated with how similar this felt, being in this woman's presence. I was sure I had finally snapped and gone crazy but then Andrea's voice came through the fog of thoughts.

"what are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm….regarding you." I admitted as she smiled.

"I feel like I'm being analyzed." She admitted with a smile and a curious look that made my heart race.

"Like the glasses." I winked at her and she blushed looking away.

"Are you from here?" she asked trying to change the subject and I smiled shaking my head.

"I'm not, I guess I'm just a tourist like you. I'm just here to have fun." I admitted as she nodded.

Suddenly a song I had not heard in forever came on and I felt the electricity of energy in the room flow through me. I didn't know if it was the alcohol or the company but I felt drunk with excitement as I swayed to the music. I hadn't felt this buzz along my body in ages and Lauren or not, I had decided I like this girl's company. Whether it would do me more harm than good remained to be seen but tonight I just wanted to have fun.

I grabbed her hand and despite much of her protests she danced with me a couple of songs. She wasn't very into it at first, I suspected she was shy but in due time she was swaying away with me. I had also noticed Andrea was Fae but I decided to remain subdued about my origins for the meantime. I didn't wanna use my thrall, compulsion or anything of the like amongst so many humans and somehow I didn't wanna use it on her either. So as we came closer with the music I held her close, out hips moved in unison and my heart hammered faster than I remembered it doing. I was drunk with her scent now that we were so close and I couldn't understand what to make of it. Once a slow dance came on she untangled herself from me and ran off the exit. I stood there perplexed for a minute deciding if I was to give chase. My feet moved along before my mind caught up and I pushed the heavy exit door before the night air hit me.

I noticed Andrea sitting under a street lamp in the back alley. I walked over trying to calm myself as I looked for the words to say. She was taking deep breaths and looking at the puddles of the night as I approached cautiously. It was pouring now and she was just sitting under the rain getting poured on. I yelled to get her attention startling her.

"Hey, why did you run away?" I asked and she shook her head.

"I'm sorry, I've just… I've never been with a woman before…" she mentioned shyly and I held back a chuckle.

"That's alright, it's normal to feel nervous." I admitted sitting next to her on an electric box. "I don't wanna push you into anything you've never done."

"I want to do so many things I've never done before…" she sighed with a wishful look.

"Well, I've heard San Junipero is a party town. There's tons of things to do, we can find one that you haven't done before for sure." I flirted as I saw her aura spike even more than the attraction ever present since she saw me.

The feeling of this aura was so familiar yet different that it edged me on to push Andrea and see what this night could bring.

"This night is all up for grabs... Why waste time sitting here?" I asked as my hand moved suggestively to her mid tight squeezing in a straight forward way pushing my luck as it was.

I saw her aura spike to a deep lovely golden hue as I smiled at her stuttering while she hopped off the box. I knew she was trying to reject me politely so I tried to make it easier for her. Perhaps I had pushed too hard too soon.

"It's alright really…" I offered and she looked back horrified.

"No, no it's not like that… you're lovely and I just…" she sighed fighting for her thoughts. "I'm engaged, his name is Red."

The words were like a kick to my gut but then again perhaps it wasn't such a bad idea. This would keep me from getting too involved into a situation that would probably end badly.

"And is Red here?" I asked.

"No he's…" she drifted away looking into my eyes and my smile perked up.

"Elsewhwere?" I offered and the blonde nodded her head looking at her feet.

"Yeah…"

"Wanna come to my place? Go to bed with me?" I pondered. "we could be back at mine just like that."

"I… never did anything like that" she admitted and I nodded with another smile. I just couldn't help the attraction to this woman as my Succubus growled at her familiar scent.

"All the more reason…" I challenged and her lust spiked even more.

"I can't." she shook her head and I nodded.

"Ok" I decided to let this go, if Andrea's aura was any indication, this wasn't finished tonight.

"I just… I can't" she admitted painfully. "I have to go…"

"In this downpour…?" I asked incredulous.

"It's been really great to meet you…" she mentioned offering her hand to me again.

"Likewise" I whispered with a smile as we shook hands deeply intrigued with what just happened as she walked away.

I looked up at the neon blue sign that adorned the name of the bar we had just met in. The hue covered me in the alley and there I pondered on what had just happened. Was Tucker's in my new home of San Junipero purgatory? Was I paying for the things I had done with this reflection of the woman that I loved? The woman I had tried so hard to supress so I could get my life together; therefore the sole reason for my nomadic ways. As I watched the blonde disappear in the darkness my mind screamed at me a warning for the umpteenth time. I knew this could get ugly, this wasn't Lauren; but I simply couldn't help myself.