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three words to die for

All men speak the language of desire. It is the burden of good men to reject it.

October 29, 10:42pm
Cafe Leblanc

The room was fatally silent.

They huddled around the table like vultures. One, two, three, four sets of unblinking eyes fastened on the boy with midnight blue hair. They waited for a wrinkle to ridge his complexion, a quiver to form in his voice, any gesture at all that would indicate he would break. But he remained poised. When they barraged him with insults, he ignored them. When they offered him honeyed words, he rejected them. He even kept his composure after they slandered Sayuri, the scoundrels.

Yet the night was young, and as resolute as he appeared, he was still a boy like the rest of them. His breaking wasn't a matter of if, it was a matter of when.

And then, as if to summarily prove that point, the defenses he had so carefully constructed began to crumble. A sudden tremble of his lips. All moved forward in their seats. A slight inhale of breath. All felt the hairs on the napes of their necks stand on end.

A clearing of his throat. All froze with bated breath.

At last he opened his mouth, and the words that poured forth were like music to their ears.

"If I had to choose, I suppose it would be... Akira-san."

The roar of their combined jeers drowned the room.

"That's amazing, Joker!" the cat named Morgana beamed, his large eyes twinkling with admiration. Despite appearing like an ordinary house cat — in reality he was anything but — everyone at the table interpreted his meows as words. "You're so popular, even Yusuke picked you!"

"I totally saw that comin'!" gloated one of the boys, his voice carrying further than his peers. With fierce, angled brows that lacked outer edges and a head of dyed blonde hair, Ryuji Sakamoto fit his status of 'Class Delinquent' to a tee. Leaning back in his chair, one foot pressed against the skirt of the table, he chimed, "Hey, did you hear that man? Yusuke chose you! You must feel super honored right now, huh?"

Akira, a quiet boy with fashionably round glasses, could not help but laugh along. His friends' affections were contagious. Hunching his shoulders forward, he rubbed the back of his head and gave a simple, "Thanks, Yusuke."

On the other side of the table, Akechi, a chestnut haired youth, chided his poor luck. "A fortuitous guess by Sakamoto-kun," he mused, holding his chin in his gloved hand. "Certainly not the outcome that I was expecting."

"Ah shaddup!" Ryuji hollered. "Just because you're an ace detective doesn't mean you gotta pretend like you have everythin' figured out, Akechi. Just admit that I was right and you were wrong for once."

Akechi's demeanor softened at Ryuji's objection. "Yes, I suppose even a broken clock is correct twice a day."

Ryuji blinked several several times in quick succession, then sneered, "Hah! Well then! Glad you see things my way!"

"... Are you serious?" Morgana murmured. "That wasn't a compliment you idiot!"

"Huh?" Ryuji brought his foot back to the floor. "Whaddya mean? Didn't Akechi just tell me I'm right?"

"Do you even know what that phrase means, Ryuji?" Morgana asked, squinting.

"Er... Uh, yeah! It means that I'm right...! Right...?"

"It means that you're only right because of dumb luck, you big baboon!"

"Oh..." Ryuji paused, then snapped, "Oh! What?! Hey, Akechi! You take that back, you effin' bastard!"

Akechi threw his head back with laughter.

"How foolish," said Yusuke, the boy whose turn was right before Akira's. Even after being interrogated by his peers, he maintained a tranquility that betrayed his youthful appearance.

"I guess in Ryuji's case," Morgana teased, "He's only right once a day!"

Ryuji's brows bumped together in an angry scowl. "Huh?! What did you just say about me, you overgrown hairball?!"

"Hey, what did you just call me?!" Morgana shot back.

Chuckling at how swiftly the situation had devolved, Akechi said, "Now, now, settle down you two. At any rate, we should return to the matter at hand. Who is next to answer after Yusuke?"

There was a moment of silence as they counted whose turn it was in their heads. "Ah, it's...!" exclaimed Ryuji as everyone seemed to reach the same conclusion. Leaning his chair to the right, he wrangled his arm around his bespectacled friend. "Akiiiiiira!" he proclaimed in a sing-songy tone, "It's finally your turn buddy! What's it gonna be! Truth... or dare!"

Akira released a long, defeated sigh. "Is it alright if I pass?"

Ryuji scoffed at the notion. "The hell, man?! That's totally against the whole point of the game! This is supposed to be our boys' night in, remember? To celebrate Akechi becomin' one of us! We're supposed to be having fun tonight because those effin' boring girls decided to go shopping together! And you haven't done jack all tonight, so no way in hell you just pass your turn!"

"I too shall not allow you to concede," Yusuke said, arms crossed over his chest. "If I am to be subjected to this inequitable interrogation by our peers for the sake of 'fun', it is only fair that you share in the same fate."

"Yeah, come on Akira!" Morgana cheered. "Join in with us! A true Phantom Thief never backs down from a challenge!"

"Indeed. What kind of precedent would be set for our group if our leader surrendered over a simple game of truth and dare?" The sides of Akechi's lips curled as he offered Akira a sly wink.

He was completely outnumbered. Letting out another sigh, Akira conceded, "Alright, I'll play."

"Nice! That's what I like to hear!" Ryuji laughed as he slapped a flat palm against Akira's back, nearly sending his glasses flying off his face. Rubbing his palms together, he snickered, "Oh man, I bet a quiet guy like you has a bunch'a crazy secrets. What should we ask, guys? What's his favorite part of a girl's body? Who his crush is? Ooo, ooo! Let's ask him if he's seein' anyone right now!"

"Patience, Sakamoto," Akechi said. "After all, it is Akira's choice whether he will be asked a truth or a dare. We must let him decide of his own volition."

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say," Ryuji offhandedly replied. "I mean, it's not really much of a choice anyway. We all know Akira's gonna pick truth. The guy doesn't have a single risky bone in him!"

Akechi smiled at Akira. "Is that so?"

"Yeah, I doubt he'll choose dare," Morgana taunted, his nose pointed loftily toward the ceiling. "I bet he's too scared to pick it!"

Noticing Morgana's attempt to goad Akira, Ryuji followed up, "Hah! Yeah, what's the matter Akira? You afraid of a little game of truth or dare? Come on, step up for once! Be a man!"

"Hmph. I shall not partake in this childish taunting," Yusuke began. "That being said, I do hope you decide on dare, Akira-san, for it would be greatly to my benefit. This is the ideal opportunity to ask you to model for me, so I will not back down." Slamming his hand against the table, he rose from his seat and declared his desire to every corner of Yongen-Jaya. "Akira! I believe that at last I am ready to take my art to the next level, but I need your assistance to usher me there. Help me in exposing the transcendent beauty..." Casting his arm forth in a spitting image of The Creation of Adam, he poured the whole of his soul into his request:

"The transcendent beauty of the fully nude male form!"

A torturous silence followed.

"... What the eff man!" Ryuji finally blurted out to disperse the building discomfort. "You want Akira to get... naked?! In front of us?! Right now?! Gah!" He shook his head to purge the image from his mind. "Man, what's up with you and drawin' people's junk!"

"I-I don't want to see that!" Morgana cried as he furiously pawed Akira's arm. "Please, choose truth! Choose truth!"

"I am not asking that you be present, merely that you grant me the opportunity to issue Akira this dare," Yusuke explained. "It would be a truly stimulating experience, would you not agree?"

"No, dude, it'd be mega weird!" Ryuji protested. "Dares are supposed to be funny and a little embarrassing, not... traumatic!"

"So there are limitations to what I can ask of my subject?" Yusuke sighed and fell back in his chair. "How pedantic..."

"Pedantic peshamntic, don't ask him any dares that make him have to get naked in front of us!"

Morgana bobbed his head. "For once, I agree with Ryuji!"

Once there was a lull in the conversation, Akechi turned to Akira and asked, "Well then, what will it be? Truth, or dare?" Again the room grew quiet. The boys remained still as trees as they waited for his answer.

Akira looked at Ryuji, whose face was twisted with concern. Then he looked at Yusuke, whose face was tranquil and calm. Then he stared up at the ceiling and closed his eyes.

"I think... I'll pick dare."

Ryuji and Morgana's jaws fell agape.

"W... what?!" Morgana began panting in disbelief. "But Yusuke will... And then we'll see your... And then... Gahhhhh!"

"Seriously?! You're actually goin' through with this, Akira?! Even after hearing what Yusuke wanted to do to you?!" Ryuji searched for a semblance of understanding in Akira's calm countenance, but to no avail.

In a brief moment of inelegance, Yusuke delivered a haughty, chest-filled laugh. "Ha-ha-ha! Excellent! I knew you would appreciate the ambition of my intentions. Have no fear, Akira, for I shall perfectly immortalize your naked loins in all their glory upon my canvas!"

"No bro!" Ryuji dissented. "Didn't we already tell you, we're not gonna make him pose nude for you!"

"I must agree," Akechi said. "I am fine with most any dare being performed, but even this is quite... extreme for me. I must veto your decision, Kitagawa-kun."

Yusuke crumbled in his seat. "But what about transcending my art?"

Ryuji shot him a harsh leer. "Ah just can it! No one gives an eff about your doodles anyway!"

"You uncivilized brute," he cried. "You take that back immediately!"

While Ryuji and Yusuke bickered with one another, Akechi glanced at Akira and offered him another smile. "Once again, I wasn't anticipating you to answer in such a way. You caught me completely off guard."

Akira lifted his shoulders with a half shrug. "It wouldn't be any fun otherwise."

He chuckled and smoothed a hand over his forehead. "Very true. I suppose I should have expected that kind of an answer from you, though. After all, you are the enigmatic leader of the Phantom Thieves."

Before Akira could reply, Morgana's voice rang in his ears. "Okay then, it's decided!" the feline chimed, refocusing the group's scattered attentions. "Akira is going to be doing a dare for this round! Does anyone have any suggestions?"

Yusuke swiftly opened his mouth to speak.

"We're not doin' anything that involves him getting naked!" Ryuji shouted.

And just as swiftly closed it.

"Well, if no one has any suggestions, I have one in mind!" Morgana said. "Let's have Akira stuff his mouth with curry and sing 'Happy Birthday' to Boss! That would be really funny, nyahaha!"

Ryuji thinned his gaze and scoffed. "What are you, twelve? That's a terrible dare!"

Morgana's face creased with a frown. "Oh yeah? Then why don't you come up with a better one, pinhead!"

"I will!" Grumbling several obscenities, Ryuji scratched the side of his head and drawled, "Uhhhh... let's have him... uh..."

"We're waiting, Ryuji."

"I know, just gimme a second to think, dammit!" Snapping his fingers, he suggested, "Oh, I know! We'll have him run around the track tomorrow morning screaming, 'I love Kawakami-senpai!' That would be funny as hell."

"Ugh, you dunce!" Morgana reprimanded. "We can't do that, that'll attract way too much attention!"

"So? Aren't we supposed to be makin' him do something embarrassing? Why should we care about if other people know or not?"

"Use your brain for once, Ryuji! Won't all those detectives investigating the school find it suspicious that Akira suddenly started making such a commotion at school? They might look into him, and that would completely jeopardize the Phantom Thieves!"

He tugged on the neckline of his t-shirt. "Ah right... didn't think about that…"

"That's because you never think in general, stupid."

"You know, for a useless cat, you're really good at making me angry!"

"So we must ask Akira a dare that is neither too childish nor too conspicuous, yet will still embarrass him," considered Yusuke, holding his chin between his index finger and thumb. "A difficult task indeed…"

"Hmmm..." Akechi's features scrunched with deep thought. "What if we were to take his phone and send a private message of our own creation to someone on his contacts list? We could establish that Akira wouldn't be allowed to clarify to said person that it was his friends who sent the message unless he is there to explain it in person. Surely this wouldn't risk our detection as the Phantom Thieves and also mortify Akira appropriately."

"Man, why does everything you say sound so long and boring?" Ryuji groaned.

"Not everyone has a two syllable vocabulary like you..." retorted Mona.

After several moments of deliberation, Yusuke's expression opened with understanding. "Ah! This is a brilliant dare, Akechi-san. Though it appears initially simplistic, beneath its unassuming exterior is a deeply diabolical ploy. The possibilities for tormenting Akira-san are endless."

"Huh, whaddya mean?" Ryuji asked. "It sounded like a lot of boring mumbo-jumbo to me."

"Let me explain," Yusuke started. "Imagine that we choose to send a compromising message using Akira's phone to anyone on his contacts list. For example, suppose we send, 'You have the most beautiful eyes in the world,' to Takamaki-san. Akira would not able to explain that it was the work of his friends until they next met in person. Hijinx and chaos would certainly ensue. Surely you can see the potential for hijinx."

" T-t-to Lady Ann?" sputtered Morgana, who didn't seem to process the rest of Yusuke's explanation.

It took Ryuji a few more seconds of thought before realizing the dare's ingenuity. "... Oh yeah… Yeah, that sounds amazing! We could totally screw him over! Good thinking, Akechi! You got a knack for this whole deception thing!"

Meanwhile, Akira sat as still as a stump as everyone talked about him as if he weren't present.

Akechi proudly scratched his cheek. "Haha, well, I wouldn't sing praises about me just yet. We do not know if Akira will consent to such a dare. After all, the stakes are quite heavy. One improper text to the wrong person could greatly jeopardize his relationship with them."

"Isn't that the whole point of a dare though?" Ryuji said, turning to Akira. "Come on, just agree to it man! It'll be totally hilarious! And I promise it won't be anythin' life ruining, just a little bit of fun between guys!"

In the moment the dare seemed innocuous enough. And if given more time, they would probably just think of something worse for him to do. "Alright."

"Sweet!" Ryuji said, his face lighting up with devilish delight. He waited until Akira dug out his phone from his pocket and snatched it away from him. Showing his teeth with a wide chortle, he immediately navigated to Akira's contacts. "Heheh, alright then, this is gonna be... what the?" He stared at the screen. "Hey Akira, why don't you have any contacts?"

Yusuke peered over Ryuji's shoulder. "It appears that Akira does not add people's numbers as contacts onto his phone. How queer."

"What gives, dude!" Ryuji wailed. "How do you know who to call or text without adding them to your phone?"

Akira offered a casual shrug. "I have your numbers memorized. Adding contacts takes too much time."

"And remembering them all in your head doesn't? You're a weird guy, you know that?" Sniffing sharply, the loudmouthed blonde groaned, "How are we gonna pick a person now?"

"We could choose a person at random from the individuals he has messaged most recently," Yusuke proposed. "That way, we know the text will be more meaningful as it is someone he has been in recent contact with."

Akechi nodded. "A splendid idea, Yusuke. Let's do just that." Looking at Akira once again, he said, "In that case, we'll need you to exit the room while we deliberate. Please return when we call for you."

Akira acknowledged Akechi's orders with a genial thumbs up and headed downstairs. When he was out of sight, the others convened around Ryuji like a swarm of locusts.

"Hey, give me a bit of space to work here, guys!" he exclaimed. "It's a very delicate process."

"Were you guys being serious earlier about sending a message to Lady Ann...?" asked Morgana, though no one answered him.

"What should we send? Something nasty? Or something really gushy and heartfelt?"

"I believe the message Yusuke provided as an example earlier will suffice," Akechi replied. "It is bitingly romantic, and will certainly evoke a response from the recipient."

"Wait, that's all we're going to send?" huffed Ryuji. "That's so boring! We hit a gold mine of a dare, let's roll with it! Let's write something more risque, something that'll really get the blood boiling! Huh? Whaddya say?"

"Though this is a game for good fun," began Yusuke. "We should not cause needless strife for Akira's personal life. I believe it would be in our best interests not to send a message too excessive that it could potentially harm him."

"I must agree with Yusuke," Akechi followed up. "I wouldn't want to see any harm come to Akira-san."

With a heavy groan, Ryuji relented, "Alright fine, fine. Then, guess I'll just decide for myself who to send this bad boy to!" Swiping his thumb over several potential recipients, a wicked glint flashed in his eyes. "Heheh… Alright, I'll pick this one!"

"H-hey Ryuji…" whispered Morgana. "Are you going to send that text to Ann?"

"How should I know?" Ryuji wrote off, his thumbs tapping away at the keyboard. "I can't even tell who these numbers belong to in the first place. Could be Ann, could be anyone else."

"Do you think I could take a look for a quick second?" Morgana said, hopping onto Sakamoto's shoulder.

"Hey, get off of me you fleabag!" grumbled Ryuji as he swatted Morgana's paw away. "I'll show you once I'm done!"

"H-hey!" he protested. "Stop being an ass, Ryuji! Just lemme look for one second!"

"Quit it! I can't type when you're hanging off of me like that!"

"Lemme see!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Boys will be boys," Akechi sang.

Yusuke shook his head with disapproval. "Such is their nature."

"Stop hogging it all to yourself Ryuji, give it to me!"

"I would if you would eff off for one second!"

"Never!"

"Grrrrrr!"

"Hnnngh!"

"Morgana, stop it! Let go of me! I'm gonna… W-woah! GAH!"

"GYAAAAAH!"

The ground trembled as Ryuji toppled forward, his face planting flatly into the floorboards. His body laid there motionless, and the room drew silent once more. Then, a sudden, frantic cry broke the calm. Poking his head out from under the blonde's chest was Morgana, who gasped desperately for air under Ryuji's immense weight. Clawing at the ground in front of him, he wriggled his body in all directions until at last he slipped free. Panting so hard his ribs were visible with each inhale, he collapsed onto his back, eyes agape, and groaned.

"Goodness, are you alright Morgana? Ryuji?" inquired Yusuke as he knelt down to inspect the two. "Answer me if you are alright."

"Ugh… my face… my beautiful face..." Ryuji lamented.

"I… was almost… crushed to death… by this… dumbass… idiot..." Morana heaved.

Akechi beamed. "Sounds like they'll both make a full recovery."

Pushing off his palms, Ryuji sat up and rubbed the side of his face. It was markedly redder after his tumble. "Yeah, I'm fine. I've gotten worse from the doctor." Glaring down at Morgana, he chided, "And I'm sure I'll feel way better after this stupid furball apologizes for effing up my face!"

"Me?! Apologize to you?!" Morgana whined. "You nearly killed me! You should be the one apologizing!"

Interlocked in their usual quarrel, the two neglected the shattered husk of Akira's cell phone lying splintered on the floor. "It appears there has been an accident," Yusuke said, examining the broken device. He picked it up and attempted to turn it on, but to no avail. It was beyond repair.

"Oh my," whistled Akechi. "That can't be good."

Ryuji's face twisted white as a ghost. "O-oh shit…"

"Joker's…"

Before Morgana could finish his thought, he heard something, a rhythmic thump, thump, thump. It started off soft, but it grew louder and closer with each second. Thump, thump, thump, thump. It suddenly stopped. All eyes fixated on the origin of the noise.

"What's going on up here?"

The room collectively held its breath. "Akira…" Ryuji started, his heart beating so fast it felt like it was going to explode out of his chest. "Wait… I can explain..."

Akira examined the room in deliberate detail, not missing a single minutiae, much like a detective would a crime scene. Without a word from Ryuji, he understood full well what happened. Pinching his brows tightly together as he sighed, he said, "Please tell me you didn't send the message."

The only response was a lone gulp.

"Who did you send it to?"

"I don't remember," Ryuji replied.

"Do you remember the number?"

"N-no dude, I'm sorry..."

Before any more words were exchanged, Akechi stepped forward, his hand placed over his chest. "I apologize, the dare was my idea so the blame lies with me. If you'd like to know, the message we sent was, 'You have the most beautiful eyes in the world.'" Then, as a show of remorse, he bent his body forward seventy degrees, flattened his hands just above his knees, and performed a standing saikeirei. "Please, forgive us for destroying your phone, Akira-san."

Seeing this deeply reverent gesture, Yusuke immediately followed suit, followed by Ryuji, whose form was between awful and inexcusable. Morgana, who was unable to perform such a bow, simply lowered his head in shame.

Akira blinked curiously at his friends' actions, then blushed. "Uh… you don't have to do that, you know…" he said, reaching for the nape of his neck. "As long as none of you are hurt, it's fine. I can just get a new phone."

The others quickly returned to their regular postures, though Akechi gave one final bow of his head to show his gratitude. "Thank you, Akira. And I'm sorry once again, we took this game too far."

"Yes, it was immature of us to tamper with your personal belongings in such a manner. Please accept my humblest of apologies," added Yusuke.

"I promise I'll make it up to you, Joker!" Morgana meowed. "Promise!"

When it came time for Ryuji to apologize, he remained completely silent. He stood still as a pillar of salt, his eyes focusing on the floor where the broken phone once laid. "Akira…"

"It's really okay," assured Akira. "It's not that big of a…"

"No, it's not that," he interrupted. "I didn't send that message Akechi told you I sent… I sent a different one."

Akira blinked.

"What's the meaning of this?" Akechi snapped. "I thought we agreed to only write what Yusuke gave as an example because we didn't want to put Akira's personal life in jeopardy."

"I know, I know!" Ryuji cried, shaking his head in disbelief. "I-I changed it at the last second because… because I thought it would be funnier if I wrote somethin' else. I'm really sorry man, I was going to erase it. But then Mona and I had a scuffle and I…" He swallowed audibly. "I accidentally sent it to someone, and I don't know who it was..."

A frightening chill crept down each of their spines.

"What did you write?" Akira asked, his voice more pressing than before. "Ryuji? What was it you sent in that text?"

"I'm sorry..."

"Ryuji..."

Averting his gaze, Ryuji clamped his hands. Arms shaking, legs locked, breath shallow, he answered, "Akira… I wrote… I sent to a random person on your contacts list…"

Akira didn't know it at the time, but the three words Ryuji had sent would change his life forever.

"'I love you.'"