"Soul! Wake up! We're gonna be late!" Maka Albarn burst into the room of her roommate and partner - out of breath, irritable, and not entirely ready for class herself.

She had slept through her alarm thanks to staying up late studying, and Soul…well he was always late. In everything he did. Unless she kicked his butt into gear.

The chaos that ensued shortly after her announcement was tantamount to insanity. Both of them rushed for the bathroom, fought over the toothpaste, shoved each other out of the way to spit into the sink, and then argued over toilet privileges, which Maka won through a Maka Chop. As soon as they switched places Maka had breakfast going - simple toast and some yogurt that they could down in mere seconds. Then they were both dressing, tumbling out of their respective rooms with their clothes mostly on properly, and nearly collided in the hallway. They tripped over each other on the way out as they pulled on socks and took turns hopping on one leg as they put on their footwear. How they got down the stairs without injury neither of them knew, nor did they particularly care.

Mornings were not usually like this, thanks to Maka's penchant for getting up obscenely early - in Soul's opinion - but the general manner in which they acted around each other was pretty much the same. At this point, after they had been best friends, partners, and roommates for so long, they were perfectly comfortable with each other. They spent their days hanging out, pissing each other off, and working together at the Death Weapon Meister Academy.

"Soul! Slow down! You're speeding!" Maka squealed, flinching as they barreled around a corner at a sharp angle on his bright orange motorcycle.

"You said it yourself - we're late! Make up your damn mind, Maka!" He bellowed back, and then added, "Just hold on tighter if you're so scared!"

Maka scowled, but scooted closer to his warm body and wrapped her arms tighter around his waist, clinging to his yellow and black leather jacket like her life depended on it, which it probably did. Still though, she felt a bit weird about it.

Physical contact itself between them was normal. They lived together, bounced off each other frequently, and tussled on a regular basis. Plus, Soul had a tendency of being impulsive and impatient and would often just reach over her to get something if she didn't move out of the way fast enough. All of that physical contact was fine, but embracing him so tightly like this was just weird. Normally she held onto him more loosely while riding backseat on his motorcycle, which was never a problem since she had such good balance and normally he didn't go this fast. But, to avoid being late she put up with it, her stomach flip-flopping all the way to school.

When they arrived she was more than ready to hop off the bike, and as soon as she dismounted she was promptly barreling up the unending staircase. The two of them only just barely made it to class before the bell rang. Both slumped into their seats, out of breath and sweaty - and in Soul's case, grumpy and irritable. Maka had dragged him along behind her most of the way to the classroom, and Soul was not a morning person so running was not on his list of fun things to do after waking up.

Being cranky meant that he was not altogether thoughtful about what he was going to say before saying it, and so the first thing out of his mouth - once he caught his breath - was rude. "For such a skinny thing you sure do like to throw your weight around."

She sent him a sharp look. "If I hadn't we would have been late."

"So? A few minutes past the bell never killed anyone."

"Soul! You know I hate being late!"

He rolled his eyes at her flare for the dramatic. "Yeah, yeah. Just don't drag me along with you next time."

It was at this point that their teacher, who just so happened to be Maka's father at the moment, decided to pay attention to the fact that half the class were talking amongst themselves instead of listening to the start of his lecture. Naturally, he singled out Soul and ignored the fact that his darling daughter was also talking. Spirit had a bit of a grudge against Soul, and used every opportunity he could to confront the white haired teen. Maka was pretty sure at least eighty percent of his dislike for Soul stemmed from jealousy that she spent so much time with Soul and none at all with him.

Of course Soul was also aware of the fact that Maka's father didn't seem to like him, so neither of them were surprised by the fact that Spirit took the opportunity to scold Soul in front of the class. While being reprimanded by the teacher would have bothered Maka - her grades and academic standing being extremely important to her - Soul obviously couldn't have cared less. His lazy posture and bored expression didn't change one dot as he listened to her father chewing him out for failing to pay attention in class. If anything, he just seemed to get even more bored.

Once her father saw fit to continue the lecture, it wasn't long before Soul had slumped back all the way in his chair and his head lolled. The very soft snoring and line of drool that began to trek down his cheek was a clear indication he had checked out of school mentally. It wasn't surprising, he often fell asleep in class - particularly their first class of the day.

The rest of the day went much the same way, being one of those days where waking up on the wrong side of the bed had a persistent negative affect on both mood and luck. Soul continued to be ever-so-slightly grumpy, and Maka couldn't shake the slight edge that came from having her morning all messed up. Naturally, Black Star and Soul got into a fight at one point, which thankfully was more of a friendly fight and served to work out some of the frustrated energy in Soul. However, watching the fight only served to aggravate Maka more, as she wondered at the stupidity of her and Tsubaki's weapons.

At least the fight gave Tsubaki and Maka some time to visit, which soothed Maka's ruffled feathers some, but the fight still ended with a dual Maka Chop on both boys' heads when the scuffle threatened to make them late for their last class.

By the time Soul and Maka went out that evening to hunt a kishin egg, she was ready to expend some of her frustrated energy.

Jack the Ripper was easy enough to find. All they had to do was follow the sounds of feminine screams. Atop a set of tall stairs, Maka paused, looking down at the humanoid demonic creature with knives for fingers, long skinny limbs, a bloated belly, and metal and leather straps everywhere. She couldn't stop her gaze from going directly to his rather obscenely covered groin area, which wasn't all that covered to be honest. The only thing that was keeping her from totally retching was a metal codpiece held in place with leather, but his skinny butt still flapped in the wind thanks to the thong-like contraption he wore.

Wrinkling her nose, she grimaced, sharing a glance with Soul.

"Well, that's one of the most fashion-blind kishins we've hunted down."

Soul snorted, curling his lips to show some teeth. "Yeah. Totally not cool."

She didn't even need to use her soul perception to sense the evil floating off this particular kishin egg, but did so anyways to follow her standard procedure.

Of course since he had been registered on the mission board, it wasn't necessary for her to verify the state of her soul since it had been plainly stated on the listing. He was pure evil, fast on track to becoming a true kishin, but was still early enough in the process to be taken out by a level one meister and weapon pair like Soul and Maka.

"Well, he's definitely the one were looking for. His soul is tainted."

Soul licked his lips, already ready to eat the kishin soul. "Yep." He lowered his head and gave the monster a toothy grin before addressing him. "I'm gonna eat your soul."

The creature had already noticed them, and was releasing the woman that he had pinned previous to their interruption. She ran off in hysterics, and Maka used the opportunity to properly sentence the thing, which she tended to do before killing them and taking their souls.

"Jack the Ripper!" She called down to him, and he fully turned to give her his undivided attention, long slimy tongue lolling out of his mouth as if he was considering her for eating potential. "You have become a kishin egg by eating the souls of humans! We are here to collect your soul!"

His eyes set on Maka and he entirely ignored Soul, which was a mistake.

The white haired demon-scythe transformed at a nod from his meister, and Maka reached out to grip Soul's smooth metal handle, twirling him around her hand and body to lay him solidly over her shoulder at the ready as the kishin egg approached at top speed. When he was within striking distance, she flipped Soul around to let the thing run gut first into the butt of his handle, winding it temporarily. It gave her a second to spin her weapon around so her weapon's red and black blade faced the next attack.

Together they beat off the knife attacks, knocking them aside with Soul's long curved blade and solid metal hilt. The metallic sound of knife against scythe beat a fast-paced percussion that Maka was hard-pressed to keep up with. But she had wielded Soul now for years, and she knew how to block every thrust. The thing was taller than her, and surprisingly speedy for its size and stature, but most kishin eggs were so she had expected that. She blocked the first smattering of attacks head on, flipping Soul tail over head as she used both ends of him. Once she got under the thing's guard, she gripped Soul tightly and spun her own body instead, shoving the blunt head of him back and into her opponent's knee before rotating him and flipping her scythe friend's blade around so it arched up and back to meet the knife thrusts coming from above.

Using her footing, she rotated herself back around, in time to block the hit coming from all ten knives in a two handed attack of their opponent's. Though the blades didn't touch her, the attack did pack a punch and knocked her back into the air. While falling, she flipped her legs over her head, hard, to do a one eighty and get her feet under her again. She landed correctly, feet planted hard into the ground and she hooked Soul's blade in the ground both for balance to prevent her from still falling backwards with the momentum and also to stop the skid. He kicked up some rocks and cobblestone from the street, but it was only the pavement that suffered any damage. Soul's steel was impervious to things that could break a normal weapon. In fact, it seemed nothing could blunt, bent, or break him.

She then used him as a hook to launch herself forwards, pulling him out as she went. Her next attack was rebuffed, and she acquired a shallow cut across her bicep as a trophy, another one to add to her collection she thought sourly.

"Watch out! Don't let him get you again Maka!" Soul scolded, his reflection snarling at her.

"Yeah, yeah I know. That was my bad." She grumbled back.

It hurt, but she didn't waste time worrying about it. Instead she shoved the butt of Soul's hilt into the ground to use him almost like a vaulting pole. She spun him around in her hands so his blade was poised correctly as she made an aerial attack and launched herself into the air over the enemy, flipping over him and slashing down at the apex of her arch. Soul's long scythe blade skidded off a metallic shoulder plate, but still left a deep gash that had the creature howling.

"Yeah! We got him!" Soul enthused, his reflection grinning broadly and showing all of his sharp teeth. Drawing first blood tended to get him hyped up.

"Not enough though." Maka grunted back, dodging under more sharp slices and countering with a firm stab of Soul's blunt hilt into the enemy's solar plexus. The monster coughed and was sent stumbling back from the force of the hit. Maka used the slight diversion to spin on her heel, bringing Soul around with her, and whipped him at full-force towards the kishin's head. The deadly arch would have ended in a decapitation or crushed skull, if he hadn't ducked at the last second.

The battle seemed to be going pretty well over all, Soul's and Maka's movements matching each other through familiarity. However, their souls were not perfectly in sync. So, eventually something had to give.

A few minutes in, the enemy countered one of their attacks and managed to catch Soul's blade between two knife-fingers – twisting him through the air – and Maka was unable to prevent him from being wrenched out of her hands. He fell, sliding and skittering across the ground with a metallic screech. The sound of metal against ground was nothing though, compared to his exceptionally loud cussing and the scream of, "MAKA!"

For a brief second, Maka stared at the disgusting creature in front of her and then risked a quick glance at Soul, who was still shouting loudly from his spot on the ground. Now he was yelling at her to get her butt over there and pick him up.

She had messed up again.

Grumbling under her breath, she evaded the fresh attacks – sustaining a few cuts without Soul to guard with – and managed to get to her downed weapon. She dove to the ground in a skid that left a few road burns along her knees and an elbow, but managed to scoop him up in her hands. At Soul's warning shout, she instantly flipped onto her back and held him up to counter the attack that was coming down on top of her.

Despite being a great team, there were inevitable flubs-ups like this thanks to Maka's handicaps, and it just ticked her off to no end. Angry now at her own mistake, she attacked with more aggression, driving the thing back, and then took it down with a final swing that sliced it in half cleanly.

Soul partially reemerged from the blade while Maka still held him, and he grabbed the red glowing soul, opening his mouth wide and placing it onto his tongue by the little wiggly tail. Maka looked on, finding it oddly fascinating to watch as he curled his tongue and drew the soul back into his mouth with a slurp. He chewed and swallowed the thing, before letting out a little pleased, 'whoooo' sound as air whistled out between his lips in a satisfied sigh.

It hadn't used to be interesting enough to make her want to watch, but lately she had found it oddly fascinating. Recently she couldn't seem to stop herself from observing him consume the souls they collected. It made her feel odd, in a way she wasn't entirely sure she liked – kind of hot and prickly – as he manipulated his mouth in such interesting ways to suck in the relatively large glowing ball. Her unexplained reaction was a big part of what intrigued her so much.

He caught her looking and raised a brow, giving her a sour expression. He transformed fully, landing in a crouch on the ground which he lazily stood up from, seeming to have decided to ignore her.

He walked off with his hands stacked behind his neck, calling back, "Let's find a mirror and report. I'm booked."

As she called back to him with an affirmative, she suddenly realized how tired and achy she was. Wincing at the sharp stings of her cuts, she hustled after him. At the first mirrored surface they came across, Maka reported back to Lord Death on their success, getting a congratulation on a job well done in response.

Neither of them were overly enthused when Maka's dad also happened to be in the Death Room with Lord Death. He took the opportunity to get on Soul's case, yet again.

"Hey, listen up you little octopus head, I will fucking end you if you hit on my daughter while you two are all alone out on missions."

It seemed whenever he found saw them alone together he felt the need to say something to that effect.

Before Maka could counter the statement with 'Soul isn't you, so I wouldn't worry about it,' – in reference to his womanizer ways – Soul said, "Are you kidding? You see how cool I am? Do you think I'd be caught dead with a flat chested chick like that?" And pointed at Maka.

She saw red and wished desperately for a book to chop him with, but without one she settled with her hand, which wasn't nearly as effective and ended up hurting her more than him. "Ow! You bastard! How many times do I have to tell you to stop saying shit about my bust size?!"

Her rage was nothing compared to her father's though as he screamed like a woman and practically stuck his head through the mirror at them, smooshing his nose and face around in very disconcerting ways as he mashed it to the glass.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?! Take it back! Maka's a beautiful young woman! Have you even bothered to grope her? Go on, give her a squeeze! Are you even a man?!"

Soul's face was amusing to watch, his head tucking back while his eyebrows raised and eyes closed as if being blasted by a sharp wind. But Maka was much too angry to appreciate the humorous sight.

Her fury turned on her father and she yelled at him this time. "Do you know what you're saying you old pervert?!"

Thankfully Lord Death put an end to that with an infamous CHOP, and her father retreated into the background to nurse his dented cranium.

They managed to complete the report without any more mishaps.

In short order, they hustled back home. It didn't take too long; thankfully this kishin egg hadn't been too far from Death City. Using Soul's bike they zipped along the late night empty roads, and soon they were busting through the door to their apartment. Somehow, when she wasn't looking, Soul managed to snag the shower first, which resulted in a very displeased Maka.

Finally, an hour later, Maka was able to utilize the shower, soaking her sore muscles under the hot water. As she relaxed under the water spray and washed all the grime of the battle off her body, she thought back to the fight - which inevitably led to her contemplating her failures as a meister.

Once again she had made things way more difficult than they had to be. If she could just get over her issues, then she and Soul could take these missions so much easier.

At the very least she was the only one that ended up paying for it, in terms of injuries. None of these missions were at a high enough level for the enemies to be powerful enough to pose a danger to Soul in his weapon form. But her? She was still just flesh and blood, and as the pink water swirling around her ankles affirmed, she was all too easily cut.

They made a good team, despite her shortcomings, but when they were working together she consciously held her soul back, closed off and protected, so that there was as little actual soul contact between them as possible. Even Soul didn't realize she was doing it, since she had been doing it from the very get go. He never knew the difference.

Maka knew where it came from well enough. It was all her problem, and all her fault.

Plainly put, growing up with her cheating father had given her some serious trust issues, commitment issues, and intimacy issues, and touching soul-to-soul was way too much for Maka to handle.

With her shielded soul, they could sort of feel each other, but not really. They could sense each other on either side of the barrier that Maka put up in the same way you could see a person on the other side of glass, or hear them all muffled, but couldn't feel them or their body heat. That was the sort of shield Maka put up between her soul and his, and had done so from the beginning.

It complicated matters and made fighting together more difficult though, and she hated herself for it. They could see and hear each other, but couldn't feel their souls rubbing together; so they had to match wavelengths purely on sight and sound, and not feel, which was the most integral part of it. But Maka simply couldn't bear the thought of it.

If two bare souls touched…it was about as intimate as hugging each other naked. She honestly couldn't imagine how the others did it without any kind of…feelings. In her opinion, it was like two people touching each other skin to skin, only way more intimate even than that, and somehow everyone else did it without feeling weird about it.

She supposed it could be similar to two really close friends, or maybe sisters or something, sharing body heat skin to skin for warmth. But nevertheless, whether it was friendly, familial, or romantic, the issue was still that it was intimate one way or another.

She barely talked to her father, never even saw her mother anymore, and didn't tell anyone how she truly felt about anything…except maybe Soul. Growing up watching her dad cheat on her mom over and over and over, and then lie about it every single time - it seriously dented her ability to trust anyone. She had seen the aftermath of constant betrayal. She had heard her mom cry by herself in her bedroom at night, seen the hollow, haunted look in her eyes the mornings after, and eventually watched as she gave up on everything and everybody she loved to disappear.

Intimacy required a very special sort of trust…and she just couldn't bring herself to trust anyone that way enough to have such soul-deep intimacy.

Plus, if you were going to be intimate on this level, it also required commitment … which also required trust. If you didn't trust your partner to remain committed, how were you supposed to commit to them?

….Which led right back to the fact that soul resonance was INTIMATE, and as much as she trusted Soul, she just couldn't bring herself to do it with him. It was asking too much.

What a joke.

Her feelings and thoughts on the matter were so convoluted and messy that they didn't even entirely make sense to her.

In hindsight, perhaps she never should have attempted to become a meister in the first place. But she was driven by the desire to be just like her mother, who was one of the strongest meisters out there. Especially now, after she disappeared so thoroughly from Maka's life except for a postcard every now and then, she felt that being a meister just like her mother was the only thread tying them together.

But that didn't mean she was well-suited for it, at least not emotionally.

She groaned, bumping her forehead on the tile, and berated herself for her weakness.

It had always been like this, since the very beginning.

*Flashback*

"Alright class, today we're going to be testing you guys for soul matches. As partners you have to have compatible souls or you won't be able to work together." Professor Sid lectured. He walked around the classroom and set everyone up so that each pair was facing each other, with some space in between all the pairs to help them keep their concentration and not get distracted by another couple.

As he walked around the room, moving people around, he continued the lecture. "If your souls aren't compatible you'll have to undergo specialized training to try and get your wavelengths in sync. If that fails, you'll just have to switch partners."

Maka grimaced, not liking the sound of that.

Once everyone was in place, Sid said, "All right, remember what we've been studying up till now. Remember the technics I taught you on how to try to feel your partner's soul wavelength. I hope everyone is up to date on the reading assignments, they'll be essential for your success."

Luckily Maka had indeed read all the material - and way more - but unluckily it had only served to make her exceedingly anxious about this exercise. She didn't like the sound of soul-to-soul contact, not at this level. Just the barely-there sensation of her partner's soul humming against her own as she wielded him was uncomfortable.

She could already tell this was going to be difficult.

But dutifully she gave it her all, and as Sid guided everyone through the exercise, she followed his instructions, using all the tips and tricks to make it easier. Of course it was easy enough for her anyways since she could actually see souls, but trying to feel one and connect to it was a bit different.

They sat facing each other and held hands, as odd as that was, and then closed their eyes, trying to feel the thrum of the other's soul. It was a little touch and go for a moment, but Maka was able to find Soul relatively quickly, and he sensed her as she approached, meeting her in the middle. Instantly, the second their souls touched together for the first time, Maka freaked, the sensation way, way, way too intense and intimate for her. The core of her…was touching the core of him, and it felt…weird. Beyond weird.

It was too much.

That was the first time she had come up with the comparison of touching each other skin to skin, because it was the first thing that popped into her head at feeling it for the first time.

She freaked, and her soul went nutso, blasting Soul off her with a static pop that had him recoiling and shaking himself like a wet dog, a few shocked sounds escaping him.

"Dude! Your soul is all over the place! What the hell, Maka?"

"Sorry! Sorry! It just…it feels so weird! I freaked out." She quickly apologized.

He took one look at her wild-eyed expression and his eyebrows shot up. "Yeah, you look pretty freaked. How about you chill for a minute before we try it again, okay?"

She nodded, taking a deep fortifying breath. It seemed she wasn't the only one to be freaking out either. There were shouts, squeals, the sound of chairs tipping over, and loud conversation popping up all over the room.

Not much scared her. Maka had nerves of steel. Monsters, ghosts, scary stories, scary movies, nothing frightened her. But this…this terrified her. And the fact she was so freaked, made her even more upset. It made her feel like a failure, which didn't help her outlook on this exercise at all.

She was so nervous and upset in fact, that she chickened out entirely and started thinking about how to cheat. Which was also so unlike her that she felt a little self-loathing sneak into her heart. She hated the fact that the only way she could do this was to try and cheat, but at the same time, she simply couldn't make herself try it again in the conventional method. So she set to work building herself a shield, one that would protect her soul from his, while still hopefully letting her sense him at least a little.

As soon as she felt she was ready, she nodded and he took her hands in his again.

She reached out for him again and he met her even quicker this time, ready for it. She instantly knew her barrier was too thick, because she couldn't even sense enough of him to know if their wavelengths were compatible. So, she carefully peeled it back, layer by layer like an onion, until it was just thick enough to buffer his soul, muffling the feeling of his wavelength so that that it didn't overwhelm her. Really, she couldn't FEEL it, so much as she could sense it. It wasn't rubbing up against her in that crazy intimate way it had been, but now the barrier was thin enough that she could see and sense his wavelength. Comparing it to her own, it seemed they would be perfectly compatible, though of course with any partnership there was room for improvement.

Maka had been worried that he would be able to tell she had shielded herself, but afterwards all Soul said was, "Your soul was easier to handle that time. Barely even felt it actually."

He accepted her explanation that she simply hadn't freaked out this time.

From the very start, Maka had begun to feel guilt weighing her down. He had unquestioningly adapted to the new sensing technique without true touch, and Maka knew she was making things way more difficult than they should be. If she hadn't cheated, they could have matched up so much faster, instead of mamby-pambying around trying to sync their souls' wavelengths almost with trial and error.

*End of flashback*

They had eventually gotten the hang of her shield-muffling ways, and matched each other through sheer perseverance and lots of practice, which shouldn't have been necessary at all. But with her barrier, the only way they could match at all was to just try over and over, straining to sense each other through the glass, which she could see through, and he could hear through. He matched her soul wavelength based on the sound of it, which was a mercy for Maka, because without his special auditory ability she would have been screwed. As for her, she could match him based on sight, since she could see his soul. And thus, they were able to get past the whole 'feeling each other's soul' thing.

But then the issue of soul resonance had come up, and that was a whole other matter altogether.

Just to wield him she needed to sync her soul to his, at least to a certain extent. But soul resonance required a pair to perfectly match each other's soul wavelength until they were flawlessly tuned to each other. Then once in perfect synchronization, the two souls would essentially join together, combining to create a more powerful soul wavelength greater than either of the souls individually could make.

In Maka's opinion, just touching soul-to-soul had been like a naked hug. So, her perception of soul resonance was a hundred times worse on the scale of intimacy. It was two souls fusing, mating, merging, joining … all those words that made her cringe at the thought of. To Maka, soul resonance was the equivalent of sex, the ultimate intimate act in her book that was to be avoided above all others.

Of course they had to try in class to achieve resonance, but they never were quite able to master it through her shield. They could get close to matching their wavelengths perfectly together through sight and sound, but as they drew closer together they would butt up against her glass wall and would be kept separate, never able to fuse together the way they should. And it was a terrifying process for Maka, because the resonance of their souls would vibrate more and more intensely, until she could feel his wavelength vibrating her shield, and hers would match, making it quake under the pressure. The practice seriously worried her and she knew if they pushed it too hard her shield would shatter.

She was terrified it would break and put their souls into direct contact with each other, which was a prospect she didn't even want to consider. At this point, she had psyched herself out so much about it that the mere thought made her get cold sweats. And the fact that she could be such a coward made her so mad she wanted to beat herself over the head for it.

They could still manage to increase their power with an exceptionally weak semi-resonance, but they used it sparingly and only in emergency situations. Soul pushed her to try it more often, not understanding why it freaked her out so much, but she held firm. She was convinced there had to be a way she could eventually construct a shield that would allow them to resonate together without having to actually touch souls. She just needed to do more research.

Sighing, she finally turned off the water and toweled her body dry, tired and still aching, and now in a foul mood caused by her self-bashing and irritation at her shortcomings. She went to bed, flopping down face first, and passed out.

Author's Note:

Welcome to my newest story!

Before we continue, here are a few notes. Yes, I am skimming a little. Don't worry, there will be scenes that go into more detail, but I have a lot of ground to cover and I want to include certain scenes, even if they're brief. I will of course also be writing my own scenes, and those will be a lot more involved, but stuff like what was in this and the next chapter is mostly for setting the scene. ;)

Also, as I'm sure you noticed, this story is largely about Maka's issues, so off and on she's going to be indecisive and a bit of a scaredy-cat, but I promise it will get better. Just be patient, I know it can be a little annoying. The strong Maka we all know and love is still in there, just drowning in some baggage at the moment.