Scout Cookies
Plot:- A few scouts showed up in front of the Elite Force's doorstep one day selling cookies. I mean, what's the harm of buying some Scout Cookies? [Oneshot]
Purpledolpin05: So I got this crazy idea for part 3 of the "Elite Chaos" one-shot series, (First being Pest Problems in the Penthouse and the second story being An Elite Flu) in which they get some girl scouts selling cookies. With a hilarious twist in the end.
Disclaimer: I do not own Elite Force or any of the characters, but I own my OCs. Enjoy.
[Timeline: Sometime after The Attack]
It was another regular day in Centium City, the Elite Force were hanging out in the living room after their practice session down in Mission Command.
"Wow, I can't believe the summer heat really takes a toll on you!" Oliver stated.
"Meh, when you live in a Volcanic Planet, this heat is nothing." Skylar Storm shrugged.
"Easy for you to say, I am sweating buckets." Oliver stated, frowning as he pointed at the bucket of sweat on the table.
"Well that's a good way to let off the steam." An Asian boy wearing glasses stated before he laughed at his joke.
Kaz walks out of the bathroom.
"Oh man, this weather is KILLING me! I could use a glass of water." Kaz stated, before noticing the bucket and mistaken that as a bucket of water and drank it.
"Kaz, that's not wat-Oh never mind." Bree rolled her eyes, smirking in amusement.
"Why does this water taste funny?" Kaz asked.
"That would be sweat." Skylar stated as Kaz thought for a moment and shrugged.
"Oh well, when my house's water got cut off, my siblings and I had to drink water out of the rusted tap." Kaz stated.
"That makes so much sense of…this." Bree stated.
"That reminds me, I think Skylar would enjoy a trip to Hawaii." One of the Elite Force's helpers, a girl named Tracy, replied. "I mean I ship Pele with Kamapua'a, the Volcanic Goddess with the Rain demigod, it's like Hawaiian Skoliver."
"Oh yeah, I've read about that myth," Chase nodded.
"Totally non-related fact, I once went to Hawaii under a mission, I once saw a really cute surfing instructor on one of my trips to assassinate one of Krane's nemesis. The surfer dude turned out to be the kid of the nemesis, Krane was not happy that I let him and his family off. Plus, he kinda liked this pretty blonde girl." Tracy gave a weak smile. [References to Good Luck Charlie Sun Show where Teddy meets a surfer instructor named Kai, AKA Roman's doppelganger]
"Oh boy, are we talking about the dude that looks like that Seth dude from the Twilight movie?" Jones rolled his eyes.
"Wow, you have a sad love life." Chase stated.
"Hey at least I didn't go to prom as Bree with a GUY!" Tracy sassed back as Chase frowned a bit.
"BURNT!" Jones whooped as he fist-bumped Tracy.
"Yeah I think the whole Face Off incident is why Jake Chambers is now gay." Bree frowned.
"Sounds like Legend of Korra where Asami and Korra both dated Mako at one point before becoming a lesbian couple." Tracy chuckled.
Out of the blue, they heard the doorbell ring.
"BREE, GET THE DOOR!" Jones shouted.
"GET IT YOURSELF!" Bree threw a pillow over.
"I'll get it." Skylar offered, opening the door.
Outside the door were 3 Scouts. One was a girl with dark hair and eyes, the other girl was about 16 with pale skin, black hair and eyes, and the last scout was…a guy. He seemed unhappy to be in the whole Scouts shenanigans.
"Hello," the first scout smiled. "I'm R-(the boy nudges her shoulder) I mean Rin! These are my siblings, the boy's my brother…Len!"
"Really classic, 'Rin'!" her brother rolled his eyes at her.
"Sophie." The oldest nodded.
"Hello, um what can I do for you three?" Chase asked.
"Other than asking for your number." Kaz tried flirting with Sophie as she quickly frowned and quickly jabbed Kaz in the gut.
"Sorry, Sophie HATES boys who hit on her." Len stated, defending his friend.
"I'm sorry, I am not interested in dating anyone who's a complete idiot." Sophie scoffed coldly.
"Anyway!" Rin hissed over before smiling, "we are part of the Centium Middle School's Girl Scouts and we're here selling homemade cookies for fundraising."
"Where does the fund go to?" Oliver asked.
"It's for our schoolmate, little Roderick, he recently got into a terrible accident and broke both his legs and now needs money for hospital fees because his family is poor." Sophie replied with a sad sigh, showing the Elite Force a picture of a happy little boy.
"This little kid here wanted to be a soccer superstar and now that his legs are all broken, he might never make it into his soccer team!" Rin added.
"Or to be some K-Pop boyband member!" Sophie whined. "He looks like Chen from EXO!"
"How did he break his legs?" Bree asked in a tone of sympathy.
"Well, his legs were burnt and electrocuted during…an accident." Len stated.
"What's this 'Scout' deal?" Skylar asked over.
"I'll explain later. But in short, Scout Cookies are to die for. My sisters once sold Girl Scouts cookies, but uh my toddler siblings ate them all up before the cookies were sold." Kaz explained with a smile.
"Oh, what flavors do you have?" Bree asked.
"We have chocolate chips, mint, and raisins!" Sophie replied, giving a polite smile.
"We'll take one of each." Kaz was sold on the idea.
"That's great! It's the special homemade recipe!" Rin exclaimed happily.
"That'll be 15 bucks." Len stated.
"Just 150 more bucks and then we will have enough money to give Roderick's family to send him to that clinic…from down the lane where the doctor cares nothing about hygiene and next to that diarrhea Deli!" Rin told her friends with a weak smile.
"Oh no! Not Dan's Deli!" Kaz gasped in horror.
"That's the place." Len nodded.
"With the rats being in charge of the counter, and the cockroaches decorating the ceiling." Rin added with a weak laugh.
The Elite Force all shared a look before having a small discussion, along with their assistants Jones and Tracy.
"I kinda feel bad for the little boy," Skylar whispered.
"I know, he deserves his soccer dream to come true!" Oliver nodded.
"But guys, we should be alert on the shapeshifters too!" Chase argued.
"Look at that cute wittle face of that cherubic angel!" Tracy whispered crying, as they looked over at the 3 scouts watching a short video of the little boy Roderick practicing soccer.
"Kick that ball, little Ricky!" Len cheered.
"Fine, I know what to do!" Kaz whispered, before turning over. "We'll take all of the cookies!"
"DEAL!" Rin smiled happily. "Now we can send Roderick to that middle-class hospital with better quality hygiene!"
"Tell your little friend to get well soon, ok?" Oliver nodded, unloading the wagon of cookies into the penthouse with his Super Strength.
"Here's 300 bucks." Jones handed over some money. "Keep the change."
"These are for you." Rin handed over Tracy a small box of cookies. "Compliments from the Scouts!"
"I didn't buy anything." Tracy whispered before Rin winked at her with a grin.
"Oh…" Tracy looked at the box before her cheeks flushed red a bit.
"Thank you! Have a nice day" Sophie nodded before she and the twins left with a cheerful smile.
"Where did you get 300 bucks?" Chase asked, before frowning. "Are those from my wallet?"
"Nope," Jones shook his head before smirking over, "They're from the newly broken and robbed ATM machines from down the lane."
"JONES!" Everyone yelled over.
"Just kidding! They're from Kaz's bank account savings." Jones laughed at his joke.
"Nice!" Tracy whooped. "Anyway, Jones and I are gonna be at Aunt Tsuki's home this week totake care of the Bionic preteens."
"Fine, more cookies for us then." Oliver shrugged a bit, as he waved over at his 2 friends.
"Guess now we no longer have to worry what to buy for a while!" Kaz laughed as the Elite Force started watching movies and open up their cookies.
"Wow, these chocolate chip cookies are extra crunchy!" Bree nodded, biting onto one cookie.
"Yeah, you can taste the crisp and the heathy raisins." Chase added.
The 5 members of Elite Force were enjoying the cookies, until Kaz found out something.
"These chocolate chip cookies are delicious!" Kaz laughed, before he spotted something sticking out of his cookie. It wasn't a chocolate chip.
It looked…like a bug. Wait…that's not just any bug!
Kaz quickly spitted out his cookie.
"EW! THERE'S A DEAD COCKROACH IN MY COOKIE!" Kaz gagged.
"Now that's karma!" Chase laughed.
The next day after devouring all the cookies, the Elite Force suffered 2 weeks straight of food poisoning. Kaz suffered the most as he ended up being diagnosed with consuming cookies that contained dead bugs. Bree was second Most Poisoned in the food poisoning fiasco, and apparently being poisoned also makes your powers malfunction.
Meantime…
Sophie, Len and Rin were both laughing, before morphing into their true forms.
"That was so funny, Rainey! Who knew your cookies actually would work?!" Ranger (Len) laughed.
"I know, and I made money for poisoning the enemies!" Rainey cheered.
"I cannot wait to see the looks of those Elite Fools' faces when they all get food poisoning." Regina snickered.
"But don't you feel a little bad for them? " Ranger asked, before his sisters and him shared a look.
"NAH!" the trio shrugged as they all laughed.
"Daddy!" Rainey ran to her dad, Rodissiuss.
"What is it?" Rodissiuss turned over, ending his meeting with his older children, Roman, Riker and Reese.
"We just sold cookies for 300 bucks!" Regina stated.
"What? You guys actually made money for selling Rainey's food?!" Riker looked in disbelief.
"Yeah! To those Elite Buffoons!" Ranger nodded.
"For the cookies, we used shrimp eyes, legs and tail from Hashimoto Shrimp Intestines Milk [References to Suite Life on Deck and ANT Farm's character Hashimoto]!" Rainey smiled.
"I still say we should have gone with Big Blue for the milk part." One of their siblings, Rory (the youngest of the triplets, 18, the mysterious bad boy) stated, holding up a bottle of drain cleaner.
"Rory, we are not gonna pull a Jason Dean on the Elite Force!" Roman sighed.
"Why not?!" Rory groaned. "I would love to trigger an Ich Luge bullet on that Kaz guy, he's worse than Kurt Kelly and Ram Sweeney!"
"Yeah! I agree with Roar, that Bionic witch is like Heather Chandler, people who deserve to die in the first place!" Regina wholeheartedly agreed with her brother.
"And the baking flour we got from Romulus." Ranger added. "and the dead wasps' grandpa Gao used to scare Riker on his 13th birthday to use as raisins."
"Then why is there a cockroach inside?" Roman checked the box and asked.
"I don't know how the cockroaches got into the dough but it's their problem now!" Rainey shrugged.
"I know you want to avenge dad, but poisoning the enemies is wrong." Reese stated.
"Oh no worries, we made them suffer." Regina stated, before smiling. "Like that Bionic Witch and that Pyro Doughnut."
"But gotta say, kudos for the food poisoning skills. Not even I would have thought of it." Rodissiuss shook his head as he laughed. "daddy's so proud of you kids."
"BTW, I gave your little girlfriend Tracy her share of your cookies too, Roman!" Rainey told her brother, before Roman's face burnt red.
"Whaaaat?" Roman lied.
Welp, that concludes 'Scout Cookies' (loosely based on Melanie Martinez's song Milk and Cookies) for now. I made references to Heathers the movie (and possibly the Musical) of Jason Dean on Rory that he wants to poison the Elite Force with Drain Cleaner (and to fire a gun at Kaz as parallel to Ram and Kurt getting killed) I dunno why but I've been into the Heathers lately, probably because I ship Veronica/JD as parallels to my OC Tracy/Roman. The Elite Force certainly didn't know what hit them (sorry guys) And yeah, the Andrews (my fanmade last name for Rodissiuss' family) really, REALLY hate the Elite Force, on a scale ranking (Kaz is first, Bree second, everyone else is a tie) and made up their code language to avoid cursing in the house. [Oh and my OC Rory has a crush on Jordan from Mighty Med but she prefers Kaz so that explains why Rory hates Kaz so much, that and my other OC Ricky/Roderick was the shapeshifter that popped out of the sewers that got attacked by Kaz and Skylar, so Regina hated Kaz for hurting her favorite baby brother] Ricky is based on 3 cute little kids from The Return of Superman (Go Seungjae, Lee Sian/Daebak, and Lee Daeul, mostly Daeul since Regina is based on Soeul) Oh and Len and Rin are based on Vocaloid personas Len and Rin Kagame. If Bree is like Miku, I would describe Kaz as Kaito and Jordan as Meiko (KAIMEI AND JAZ FOREVER! No Braz isn't my cup of tea and I prefer Jordan who is more tomboyish and rough around the edges. CHOOSE JORDAN, KAZ!) And yeah my OC Tracy is sort of dating Roman so hehe, forbidden love! Whoops, sorry I like to talk a lot.
That's all for Scout Cookies, hope you liked it. Feel free to fave, follow, or review and tell me what you think. Thank you for reading and have a nice day.