A/N: A short that takes place, as you shall see, before the 1971 film "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory".

Chocolate, Now That's an Idea

"I'm just so excited Wilkinson," said the man in the green suit "I almost can't contain myself; don't worry, I'm not going to explode. Finally, after all this time the public is going to get a chance to see the inside of my factory that has never been photographed before. I get to personally conduct a tour for the winners of my contest. I know - I tend to get wrapped up in my work, slaving away in my shop alone and not see the sun for days at a time. What color is the sun again?"

"Yellow, Mr. Wonka" said the bespectacled man standing in front of his boss's desk.

"Yes, I believe you're right; I'd forgotten for a moment there." He continued to pace behind his desk as he spoke, his nervous energy not allowing him to sit for more than a moment at a time before bouncing up again. "The media frenzy around the world must be amazing. If I had a proper TV, I could watch the newscasts myself."

The television built into the wall was only half a screen; the left half to be precise.

"That's what I get for furnishing my office from a store where everything that 50% off. Anyway, when I first started this factory, I thought I was going to make my fortune producing fruitcake. But did you know no one actually eats fruitcake? They hardly even buy it; it just gets re-gifted year after year among families. I suppose the few fruitcakes that do get used are for things like constructing walls or foundations of skyscrapers. I even read where firefighters found a fully intact fruitcake in the remains of a wood house that had been completely reduced to ashes."

"I don't recall reading that article" said Wilkinson.

"I had a rude awakening with my lack of sales, but now that I've switched my product line, I think I've finally found my 'ticket' to making a fortune." Willy chuckled at his pun using the word 'ticket'. "How many more minutes do I have before the tour?"

Wilkinson checked his watch. "Two minutes. Perhaps you should make your way to the front door."

"Good idea" he said as he started down the hallway. "I can just imagine how exciting it must be for a customer to find one of the lucky tickets that will allow them and a guest on the tour. I know I would be for sure." They stopped just inside the front door. "I can even hear the crowd out there. Wish me luck, and here we go."

He flung open the door and bounded out and across the short distance to the front gate, hiding his face under his large hat. Stopping in front of the gate he raised his head and spread his arms while launching into "Congratu…"

There was no crowd. There wasn't even a group. The only person about was the man driving the street sweeper that was making the noise, and after he passed there was silence again. He looked down at the green ticket in his hand:

The bearer of this ticket is entitled with a guest to tour
Willy Wonka's Brussel Sprout Factory
October 13 – 10am Sharp
All the free samples you can eat

"I just don't get it" he said dejectedly. "I make the finest brussel sprout cakes, puddings and ice cream in the world. I even wrote 'The Veggie Man' song that got stuck in my head for two weeks. Where did I go wrong?"

Wilkinson put his hand on Willy Wonka's shoulder. "Sir, if I could make a suggestion…"

The End

A/N: For the record, my wife likes both fruitcake AND Brussel sprouts (not together.) I let her have my portions.

I have no idea how I got the notion for this story, just something that popped into my head while driving. The hard part was trying to remember it until I got home again later.