Ich bin ein schlampe

Winter was fading away. Harry sat outside, a fur blanket wrapped tightly around him. He wasn't allowed anywhere by himself anymore, there were two Death Eaters just a few feet to the right of him. They were straight-backed and watched every movement the world made, wands out to be prepared for an attack that could occur at any moment.

Harry used to feel strong, like he could fight. Now his wand was left inside, his magic poured not into spells but the child inside of him. He closed his eyes and wondered if he'd ever have his strength back. He wondered if he even wanted it back.

"Lord Consort, it's getting dark. It'll be colder soon." One of the Death Eaters said.

"I know." Harry sighed. He ran one of his hands over his stomach, where there was now a large, wide bulge pushing out. He couldn't be due soon, he wasn't even at five months yet, but the weight pushing on his frame was beginning to become unbearable.

Wizards weren't meant to have children, Harry thought. Yet he was going to have one now, likely more in the future. Voldemort was far too pleased with the thought for it to not happen.

Once upon a time, Harry probably would've fought. That isn't a reality anymore, it's a fairy tale of a very different Boy-Who-Lived, who was supposed to become a grand sorcerer and a warrior for the Light. He wasn't that. Reality was he was the Dark Lord's consort, meant to be nothing but a pretty face.

"You won't ever be a woman, you won't gain breasts. You will have to feed the children through a bottle." Voldemort said. "But your body will change with every pregnancy. Eventually, your hips will be forever plush. Like a toy."

"For you to play with?" Harry asked.

"Forever." Voldemort grinned, dried flakes of Harry's blood between his teeth. He tried not to shudder, but let himself press deeper against the Dark Lord's chest.

Harry turned around. "I'll head inside now." He said.

The Death Eaters nodded and followed him closely back inside of the manor

Ich bin ein schlampe

"Dammit! We're not any closer to getting him back!" Sirius punched the table.

"Padfoot, you have to calm down." Remus tried. All around them the Order members watched, as tense as Remus and some as worried as Sirius. "We'll get him back, we just have to be patient and work hard."

"I don't see why we're trying to get the boy back." Someone spat. "He just left. Severus said he's the Dark Lord's whore."

Molly Weasley whipped out her wand. "Don't you dare talk about him that way!" She snarled. "Don't you realize how scared he must be? How horrible it must be for him right now?"

"I'm going to cut off the Dark Lord's dick and force him to eat it." Sirius growled. "We're wasting time just sitting around here planning. Merlin knows what he's doing to Harry."

"He hasn't harmed Potter physically." Severus said. Eyes turned to him. "He wants the child growing inside of him too much. Any harm on him is mental. I've never heard him talk unless the Dark Lord is speaking to him. When we do get him back, there's a chance it won't be with his child and an extreme possibility he won't want to be with us."

"There's no way we'll let Harry's child remain with You-Know-Who." Remus insisted.

"I'll fucking-" Sirius jumped up.

"Padfoot, sit down! Being angry isn't helping any!" Remus shoved his friend to his chair. "We have nothing! Severus can't tell us the location of the Dark Lord's manor because he doesn't know where it is. Everyone who does are Inner Circle Death Eaters too far up You-Know-Who's cunt. We need an idea, something to try to save Harry."

Nymphadora Tonks nodded. "Remus is right. We need something new. All we've done is run around the country."

"Like beheaded chickens!" Arthur Weasley piped up.

"What do we do then?" Sirius asked.

Remus sighed. "I don't know." He admitted.

"Why don't we send his owl after him with a trace on her?" Charlie Weasley spoke up. "Maybe she'll find him? We haven't tried that yet."

"We haven't." Remus conceded. "But they might hurt her. Harry loves her."

"Then she won't be harmed." Severus said. "The Dark Lord is merciful to those Harry shows affection for. He likely knows of Harry's love for the bird, he will not harm it. He might even believe it to be trace-free, thinking it found Harry of her own free whim."

"We'll try it, then." Remus declared. "Any objections?"

No one spoke up.

Ich bin ein schlampe

Harry enjoyed his baths.

A House Elf washed his hair with soap that smelt like baking apple pie, while another softly rubbed a similar-smelling oil into the soles of his feet. The Dark Lord gifted him with many luxurious items; clothes, jewelry, sweet-smelling soaps and creams. Part of him still said he shouldn't like any of as much as he did, but he loved it. Being taken care of by Voldemort, tended to by House Elves and protected by the Death Eaters. Not a thing he had to do himself, his only mission to put his effort into pleasing the Dark Lord and reporting any symptoms he had from his pregnancy.

Warm water poured through his hair and Harry let out a soft, pleased sigh.

"Elves, leave."

Harry opened his eyes and looked over to the Dark Lord. The House Elves bowed, dropping their tasks, and popping out of the bathroom. "My Lord?" He asked.

Voldemort pulled off his robes, the black fabric fell apart with ease. It collapsed to the ground like smoke. He stepped over them and entered the large tub.

Harry felt his heart stutter. His mouth dried. It's been so long since he's been fucked. He would kill even for something gentle, but couldn't wait until it was time and his child was cut out. Finally, he'd be able to be turned inside out again.

"Come to me." Voldemort ordered.

Harry moved his legs off of the rim of the tub, dunking them underneath the bubbly water. He shivered and moved closer to the Dark Lord.

When he was near, Voldemort grabbed his sides and lifted him. Not high to be pulled out of the water, but just enough to place him onto his lap. "How is my consort?" He asked.

"Good." Harry said. "Though, you made the elves leave. I do enjoy being pampered, y'know."

Voldemort grinned. "Sweet thing, you can sacrifice tonight. I wished to spend time with you." He said.

Harry leaned as close as he could, resting his head on the Dark Lord's shoulder. "I suppose I can't complain."

The Dark Lord's hands massaged his sides, moving back to run across his back. "I have an attack planned two years from now." He said. "Hundreds of thousands of Dementors will go to the city of London, devour the soul of every muggle they find."

"Millions will die." Harry said, closing his eyes.

"Muggle lives only." Voldemort said dismissively. "I'm going to turn London into a Wizarding capital. It will be where our children spend their young lives."

"Will they go to Hogwarts?" Harry asked.

"I would have it no other way." Voldemort said. It sounded like a promise. "I am curious which House they'll be in. Slytherin, or Gryffindor."

"I'll laugh if the next Heir of Slytherin is sorted into Gryffindor." Harry said.

Voldemort's hand moved from his back to grip his thigh. "Indeed." He hummed. "I think…We will wait a time after our first. I dislike the months being unable to be inside of you."

"I miss it." Harry admitted, whispering.

"After the birth, once you're healthy, I'm going to fuck you until you faint." Voldemort declared. "I'll give you potions to avoid another early pregnancy, so I can fill you. I'll plug you up, keep my semen inside of you for days…I'll make your belly bulge."

Harry swallowed. "My Lord." He breathed. "I can't hear this, it's too…" He shifted, trying to force his erection down.

"I know, my dear. You don't have my control." Voldemort said. "Patience, it won't be long, will it? Only a few more months."

Harry nodded. "Only a few more months." He repeated, agreeing.

Ich bin ein schlampe

Sirius sat in the back of the cramped kitchen, watching as about a dozen Order members, the Weasley family, and Hermione Granger pass around food. He couldn't bring himself to eat most days, living off of nutrient potions and firewhiskey. He was losing weight, but he couldn't bring himself to care. He couldn't understand how these people could talk and joke and be happy, when Harry was somewhere, probably in pain.

He'd failed James three times now. Not putting up a fight when Peter was named Secret Keeper, becoming caught up in his need for revenge that he let his godson be handed off to neglectful, abusive muggles that were so horrid Harry was ready to live with him just after he'd been freed from Azkaban, and, now, letting Harry just walk out of 12 Grimmauld Place into the arms of the Dark Lord Voldemort. Who raped him, while he was at the Dursley's. Protective magic be damned, it did shit to help Harry. Sirius couldn't take any of this back. The one to suffer wasn't him, it was Harry.

Harry, who was somehow convinced by Voldemort leave 12 Grimmauld Place. He embraced his rapist, Sirius presumed out of the result of a good number of threats. Merlin knew what Voldemort was holding over his godson. Harry was too young to raise a child, but he was going to. Worse yet, it was the child of You-Know-Who. A child that only Harry would probably have to fight to keep. Sirius knew everyone in the kitchen would try to convince him to give it up the moment they got him back. He hated every single one of them. Except for Remus.

Poor Remus, too caught up in his life for Nymphadora, self-guilt and pity. Sirius couldn't be mad at him. Everyone else? Easily. Even Harry's closest friends who were laughing at some stupid joke.

He was hopeful Hedwig would bring results, but she hadn't been back in a week. Sirius doubted she was going to ever return.

"Sirius, do you want anything to eat?" Remus had come up to him.

"No, I'm good." Sirius raised his goblet of firewhiskey.

"You should eat something." Remus said. "Harry wouldn't want you to starve."

"I'm not going to starve. I've gone without less." Sirius said. His old friend winced. "Go on, go flirt with Tonks, will ya?"

Remus spluttered and quickly shot away. Sirius was smiling until the man was far enough away.

He couldn't stay in the kitchen any longer. Sirius finished off his goblet and left. He was going to go for a walk.

Ich bin ein schlampe

Harry waited in Voldemort's office for the Dark Lord to return. He's waited for the past three hours, patiently sitting in front of the fireplace in a plush armchair. Nagini had gone to chase Wormtail around the manor, her favorite pastime, about an hour ago. He really didn't have much to do, so he had no problem waiting.

His stomach was distended and hard to coexist with, but the chair he was in was extraordinarily comfortable. A Healer the Dark Lord had called in had said Harry was set to have his child sometime between March and April, stating the child was rapidly developing. Harry didn't know nearly enough to question it, just believed it. The Dark Lord took the Healer's word it, after performing his own tests.

Harry didn't understand why Voldemort bothered to call in a Healer when he was capable of performing the examinations himself, but he knew better than to question it.

Sometime past the fourth hour waiting, Harry was falling asleep.

Then the door opened. Harry forced himself away and pulled out of the chair. "My Lord, where have you been?" He questioned, holding back yawn. He turned and froze.

Behind the Dark Lord was his godfather.

"Harry!" Sirius shouted, shoving past Voldemort and rushing towards him. He pulled Harry into a hug, surprisingly conscious of his stomach. "Merlin, I've missed you!"

"Sirius, what are you doing here?" Harry asked when Sirius pulled back.

"He wished to see you. I brought him." Voldemort declared. "He will become your bodyguard and companion. I believe your mental health requires it."

"How did he convince you?" Harry questioned.

"He showed me a bunch of memories." Sirius said. "I…Harry, you seemed so happy in them. I had thought he had forced you. Into everything."

Harry smiled. "He kinda did, Sirius." He said. "I've just come to enjoy it."

"But you're happy, right?" Sirius asked.

Harry nodded.

"Then it's all I need." Sirius stated.

"I might've given a few doses of a Calming Potion." The Dark Lord commented. "When they fade, I doubt he'll continue to be so understanding."

Sirius blinked.

Harry sighed.

being honest with myself, this story isn't realistic at all but i can't bring myself to care. this is a total self-indulgent mess that has a 0.0000009% percent change of likelihood. aha! i love it though. can you blame me? it's like everything i kept back from my story amber into one ugly mess

i hope there isn't a whole of grammar/spelling mistakes. it's rlly late as i write this. should def be understandable for y'all readers.

there's prolly a kinda dark undertone in all of this and honestly...idk. i wish i was a better writer to actually legit explore on that darkness because i bet it would be a 100% legit ass fic for someone to read. but i'm a crappy writer who likes to poke slime in the middle of writing, return to writing, poke some slime, go get a snack, write some more, poke slime, drink some milk, and finish off the writing.

i'm really tired and i'm totally rambling. unapologetic tho lmao

y'know imma take the time to say how i've posted a total of 14 stories now and i am extremely happy about that. i wanna try to get to thirty stories by the end of this month (yes i know i prolly won't make it shut up) and writing this has def taken time away from that goal. oh well...again self-indulgence rn. this is my self care.

because self-care is writing a story about harry being raped, brainwashed, and impregnated by the dark lord at five in the morning.

p.s. i read lmao as 'lame-o'

p.s.s. to the guest reviewer...tbh i thought it meant 'i am a slut' but i guess whore and slut is basically the same thing. also, idk. mostly cause that's what ppl would prolly see harry as in this situation. because people suck. and i wanted to flaunt my tiny knowledge in german somehow

p.s.s.s. i'm beginning to realize i have a slight thing for brainwashed-harry

p.s.s.s.s. a new to be posted by tomorrow prolly