Katniss pov

We get home, and things are even more awkward than the train. It's like everything that happened didn't and we're back to the start. I avoid him, and he keeps to himself. It's just like before.

He doesn't come over and I don't leave. Until one day I was on my way back from the woods, and there he was. He stands on my front porch facing the door with flowers in his hand.

"Peeta?" I call. He turns around surprised.

"Katniss,"He says awkwardly ,"Prim invited me for dinner."

I lead him inside. Of course. Count on Prim to play match maker. When we get inside, Prim is running around the kitchen trying to cook.

"Are those flowers? For Katniss?"she asks.

"Oh! Uh... yeah, yes they are,"He says awkwardly and plucks one of the daisies from the bouquet and hands me them. Then he turns and hands Prim the one he plucked. "For the young lady."

"Oh thank you!"she blushes.

Then she gives him a big hug and turns away to continue cooking.

"Oh darn!" She cries,"I forgot the asparagus! I have to run to the store! I'll be back!" She tells as she grabs her coin purse and runs out of the house.

I set down my game bag and my arrow sheath. I can feel him watching meWe've been avoiding each other. When I turn around I can see It in his eyes. He doesn't know if he wants to yell at me or kiss me...

"What have you been up to since we came home?" He asks.

"Just hunting, back to my old routine."I state.

"And sleeping?" He asks.

"I don't. You?"

"Never." He says.

"What have you been doing?"

"Painting mostly. Baking."

"What do you paint?" I ask as I walk closer to him.

"I paint my dreams. And my dreams are always about the past."

"You paint the games?"

"Sometimes. Sometimes it's more recent." He says as his hand lightly falls on my thigh. My eyes meet his and this his how we stay. My hand mirrors his and falls on his thighs.

We sit there frozen starring at each other. Each one buzzing with energy. Pent up energy we've had since we got back.

He leans his face in slowly until his lips touch mine. His hand reaches around and grips my head as he deeply kisses me. His tongue mingles with mine as he pulls me closer. My arms wrap around his neck as I slowly crawl onto his lap.

His hands grip my hips.

"Eh-hem." We hear from behind. I turn to find my mom walking into the kitchen. I quickly crawl off of Peeta's lap and back into my own chair. Peeta's face is bright red.

"I need to go,"Peeta says standing up and walking out of the house.

"Wait-" I call out but it's too late.

My mom walks over to me and takes a seat. "Anything you want to talk about?" My mom asks.

"No."

"Katniss, you haven't talked since you came home. Katniss what happened in the capitol?"

"I can't tell you, mom." I say standing up and walking out. I run over to Peeta's house. When I go in, I don't find him right away. I wander around until I go into the third room down the hall.

He's sitting on a chair painting. I gasp when I see the room. His paintings fill the room. He paints his dreams.

Me. My face is everywhere. In the games. On the victory tour. Naked on a bed. I'm everywhere.

"Katniss!" He says alarmed. "I uh...I'm sorry...this is how I cope with everything that's happened-"

"Shh."I say as I walk near him. I stand right in front of him. Nose to nose.

He puts his hands on my hips and presses his forehead to mine. Our eyes close and he pushes our hips together.

His lips graze mine. My hands go on his chest as I unbutton his shirt. He lifts up my leg and wraps It around his waist. His lips move down to my neck and collarbone.

He moves me to the couch in the room. His hands move to undo my pants. I can feel him hard against my thigh. His breathing in my ear as he works on me.

His eyes stare into mine, as if he's remembering everything about me for later. He traces my body with his fingers.

"What are we doing, Katniss,"he whispers to me. He sits up and the light hits him like he is a god. He's beautiful.

"Trying to forget. Trying to feel." I say as I openhandedly run my hand from his naval to his chest and back.

He looks me in the eye and says the same thing he said to me in the train station after our games.

"I don't want to forget."

"Then feel." I say reaching up to grab him by the collar...

After I lay on top of him.

Peeta strokes my hair and says,"what's wrong with us?"

"We're messed up." I say.

He kisses my forehead. His hand runs over my back and presses me into his chest, I press my cheek into his chest and close my eyes.

"How do we get through all of this? How do we live."

"We survive. We try to feel."

"Katniss, I cant live without you." I freeze.

"Peeta," I say,"I-"

"It's okay... you don't have to say anything." He says.

I don't know what to do. I'm not great with emotions. But I can hear the disappointment in his voice as I stay silent. So I curl up to him even more. And I stay silent.

We stay like that for a while until it's dark and I need to go home. When I get home I shower and then go to Prim's room. She's asleep so I lightly pet her hair and remind myself why I try.