Hem Hello….waves tentatively So it's been a while, huh? Yes, I realize that it has been over a year since my last update! O Much regret and apologetic thoughts running through my head just now, I assure you. Anyways….GOOD NEWS (for me, that is XD): school is OUT! I just had my last exam, and as of now, I am FREE…relatively speaking, that is. In any case, here's the looooooooong-awaited chapter! I really don't know if I did all the wait you guys have been doing any justice. I've been trying to get my groove back, so to speak, and get a feeling of how I wanted this story to flow. It's hard, to say the least – it's been a while. Hence, is explained the reason why I used this chapter to kind of familiarize myself with the story. I hope it doesn't disappoint too much. Happy reading!
By the way…I've been doing some reading recently – going over my work, etc. Let's just say that I found myself banging my head on my wall halfway through the first chapter. This story, I must say, was excruciatingly painful to read. On that account, I have taken it upon myself to fully declare war. What war, you ask? Why, against this story, of course. Major editing is required, and will be applied accordingly – and liberally, if I have anything to say about it (which, I do grins cheekily). Soon. Uhh…that is, when I get around to it….or rather, when my summer school ends. Right, that's it. Ugh.
Chapter 14: Where do we go from here. . . ?
". . . But he didn't remember me. It wasn't the fact that I had travelled across Europe and Korea to find him. It wasn't the fact that it took me so long, either. It was just that he couldn't recognize me – that, when he saw me, he saw a stranger. That was the reason for my real fear."
Kesumi blinked as she fell into a contemplative silence, the rest of her speech ebbing away under her breath.
She turned her head towards her friend, searching the older girl's expressionless face with an inexplicable feeling swelling in her chest. "I . . .was really scared, Tenchi." She uttered once more, a tear leaking from her eyes.
Tenchi turned her piercing blue gaze towards her, and they softened at the sight of her teary face. She opened her arms, and Kesumi willingly fell into them.
A sob wrenched from her throat, and Kesumi struggled to remain afloat.
But it was always easier to drown.
Evening had settled over the garden extending from the wide glassy entrance of the hospital. The bench on which the two girls occupied was shadowed by the gracefully arching arm of a particular tree. It was to that tree Tenchi's eyes were fixed, and she drew strength from its firm solidity as Kesumi steeled herself from hers.
She opened her mouth to comfort Kesumi, a friend so close that she was no different from her sister, but words that seemed almost gruesomely unfit in this situation were the only ones available to her grasping mind.
A weak sigh escaped from her soft lips; they almost trembled under the weight of the words she managed to pull from herself, "Do you know, Kessy, how much you mean to Kai? He wouldn't leave you. Trust me on that, k?"
Kesumi made no move to respond, but when she finally pulled away, Tenchi caught the look in the younger girl's eyes and knew that she understood.
"C'mon, let's go see how Kai's holding up." Tenchi offered Kesumi a smile, one so blinding in genuine sincerity that the previously crying girl was hard-pressed not to return it.
"Yeah."
"Oh good, Kesumi, you're back. . .The doctor was out just now, and he was giving us updates on Kai's condition. . . err in Korean. Eh, but from my recently honed skills regarding the Korean language, it's obvious that –"
"What honed skills, Tyson?" Kenny interjected, wearily passing a hand over his face.
"That is – "
Ray, predicting an imminent quarrel, spoke expeditiously.
"Kai's okay – our translator was called in a while ago. In any case, the surgery was successful, and all he really needs is stability and prolonged rest."
Kesumi heaved a sigh of relief, and turned to Tenchi with sparkling eyes. "He's really okay, Tenchi. He's okay."
The older girl tipped her head in a gesture of understanding, a decisively impassive line in her expression. But as Kesumi glanced into the eyes of the other girl, she felt more than she could visibly conclude that Tenchi's initial fears and concern were gradually abating as well.
"Um, Tenchi Balkov, was it?"
Ray's soft inquiry broke through everyone's sudden immersion into silent reverie; the addressed female shifted her smouldering blue eyes toward the speaker.
"Yes."
"Whoa, no way! You're the internationally acclaimed female blader, aren't you!"
Kenny opened his mouth to restrain Tyson once again, but Tenchi's amused grin mollified his embarrassment for his friend's behaviour.
"I am."
"Hmm, one to two worded answers. . . . are you related to Kai, by the way?"
This time Max stepped forward, pinching Tyson as surreptitiously as possible. "Heh, it's a pleasure to meet you. We've watched you in action many times, and I must say that you're brilliant."
Tenchi inclined her chin graciously, a ghost of a smile touching her eyes.
" Ugh. What's up with all this formality, you guys? We're all about the same age. In fact, Ray is one year older than Tenchi!"
"Hm anyways," Kesumi ploughed on, oblivious to the fact that her comment had only produced an accretion in the level of awkwardness in the air, "I'm so tired. Let's sit down or something."
The group made to move into the sitting area, but Tenchi's soft decline stilled them once more.
"Sorry, Kessy, I have to go. But I'll keep in touch."
"Wait! Aren't you going to see Kai before you go?"
Something in Tenchi's eyes flickered, their colour at present a silvery blue. "Take care, Kessy."
And before any of them could form another response to hold her back, Tenchi had disappeared from sight, her smooth, even steps no more than an inaudible echo in her wake.
"Doctor Kim," Tenchi called, increasing her pace only mildly to station herself within conversing distance with the man in question.
"Hello, what can I do for you?"
She replied in fluent Korean, "It's about Kai Hiwatari, the patient that you're in charge of, if I'm correct in assuming?"
"Ah yes, Mr. Hiwatari. Have you familial relations with him?"
She paused hesitantly before resuming coolly, "Yes. Would it be at all possible for me to see him at this moment?"
"His condition is stable enough for visitors; however, he is still unconscious. In any case, we would need to know specifically how you're related to the patient before visitor permission is granted. His physical state is still very frail."
He gave her a measured look, glancing at her face over the tips of his glasses.
"I am. . . his. .. girlfriend." She spoke curtly, an unbidden blush threatening to rage against her cheeks.
"His girlfriend." Doctor Kim reiterated; it was impossible to tell whether or not he had believed her. In fact, Tenchi was almost sure he was going to turn her down as politely as possible until he opened his mouth again.
"Very well. But there is to be only one person in his vicinity at a time. Please make sure that you are the sole occupant in the room other than him, obviously."
There must have been something terribly desperate and sincere in her eyes, because the doctor acquiesced to her request with only a sympathetic smile.
"Thank you, sir."
"You're welcome, Miss. . . . "
"Balkov," she supplied gratefully.
"Yes, Miss Balkov. I would like to press upon you once more the importance of stabilizing his condition at the moment. And because it is patently obvious that your affection for him is genuine, I leave him in your care, albeit temporarily, for I know he would be in good hands."
An emotion that she hadn't felt in such a long time clogged up her throat, and digesting the unexpected ambivalence of her feelings from calm to frenetic was impossible.
She hadn't been susceptible to such fluctuation of emotions since . . . .since Kai had left the Abbey all those years back.
So she bowed in the custom that was both Korean and Japanese, knowing that the prudent Doctor had already understood.
Tenchi turned down the hallway, walking aimlessly until she finally realized that she had forgotten to confirm which ward Kai was in. On top of that, the hospital was so damn big that it was more of a maze than a hospital.
In effect, she was lost.
She cursed herself briefly, wondering what in the world was going on with her normally meticulous mental facilities.
A quick dig in her left pocket resulted in the discovery of her cell phone, and she quickly flipped it open. "Ryu? I'm at Seoul Hospital right now. Locate the ward number in which I can find Kai Hiwatari…yes, he's a patient here. He was recently admitted for having been involved in a car accident. By the way, Kai's going to have his security guards prohibiting entrance to unwanted visitors. Detain them for me, would you? I'll let you know when they can be brought back. Mm. Thanks."
She flipped her phone shut, made a note to give her assistant a raise and strode off in the direction Ryu had described.
He lay there, living.
And he tried blearily to recollect shards of memories that were fleeing from his grasp.
There was a car accident, and there was Tenchi. And Tala had been the driver of the truck that had run him over. Kesumi was sobbing in a corner of the dungeon, and he couldn't make her stop crying
Tenchi's eyes were piercing though him, witnessing his fall, watching the blood drip from his head, and glancing at Tala who was still motionless behind the wheel of the truck.
No, he thought.
That wasn't right.
There was no one named Tenchi standing on the curb of the road.
The driver of the truck wasn't Tala.
And there was no dungeon with a weeping Kesumi.
There was only silence and the cool breath of the humidifier at his bangs.
I'm in the hospital, he thought wryly, again. This time, however, he was attired in the whole patient wardrobe with bandages to boot.
Eyes still closed, he assessed the damage that had been inflicted on him, the way he had been trained to do after each session in the dungeon with Boris.
Judging by the tightness of his torso, bicep and left leg, he must have acquired gashes there; the heaviness in which the air seeped into his lungs spoke volumes of the impact to his chest, and the throbbing headache told him that it had been his head that had taken the brunt of his fall.
He ruthlessly quelled a crescendo of rising panic in his chest: what if he forgot what little memories he had remembered again? What if he forgot Kesumi and Tenchi and Tala all over again?
His clenched fist went lax at his side as he was deluged with an overwhelming sense of confusion. Ten. . . chi?
Then who was Cecile?
Why did two names resurface only one face?
Why did he see only one pair of scintillating blue eyes?
And then he understood. Tenchi. She was his best friend's younger sister.
She was what his grandfather always failed to view as anything other than his primary distraction. And for that, his grandfather almost. . . an acrimonious grin tipped his lips. . . why the old man almost feared her.
Because, he concluded, his eyelids still sheltering the wealth of emotions that one might have been able to decode from his usually guarded gaze, she was something to him that no seasoned killer should have.
And a killer he was. That's what he had been trained for all his life: a stoic, impenetrable, invincible leader, whether in the blading ring or in the battlefield.
He remembered now.
His bitter smile turned empty, and his lips once again went slack with indifference.
Kai Hiwatari. Assassin. Potentate. Biovolt's secret weapon.
And Tenchi Balkov, the paragon of life and purity that he would never discover in the darkness that he was destined to be shrouded in.
She was the Tenchi Balkov, who would pull him out of the darkness that was his fate.
Or at least, she would have been. But his grandfather took more measures to see that she wasn't.
And for the first time since his childhood days that he was only just beginning to put back together piece by piece, he felt a terrible sadness that festered in the depth of his. . . of somewhere in the middle of his chest. . . that might even be called his heart.
Because he knew now what his grandfather knew all along. He had been disillusioned to think that he won the battle. That he came out of victor by turning his back on his grandfather and joining the Blade Breakers.
But he was wrong.
His grandfather had won, and devastatingly too.
The old bastard had succeeded in ridding him of his "distraction" all too well.
She had stood outside the door, motionless and silent. Her fingers trembled on the knob of the door, but they wouldn't do the gripping that she kept urging them to do.
So she stared, obscure eyes sweeping up and down the length of the door as if following the trek of a spider crawling against its surface.
But there were no spiders here. There were no flies, and certainly no other insects to occupy her unseeing eyes.
There was just the pristine material of the glossy hospital door – the door which hid Kai from her view.
She ran a slender hand through her hair and licked her lips almost nervously.
Truth be told, she was terrified.
Petrified to see the injuries on his person, and even more disturbed by the feelings that the sight would provoke in her, she adjusted her shaking hand on the door knob once more.
Her eyes fluttered briefly closed and with a deep, timorous inhale, she stepped into the room.
As expected, he was asleep.
And with a soft exhale, she inched forward, her eyes taking conscientious note of all of his wounds without preamble. Her lips parted unconsciously as she ran her shrewd gaze on him.
Almost to the point of being mummified, his torso was swathed in thick bandages so that, even though he was technically shirtless, there was not at all an indecent amount of skin showing.
On the whole, she concluded, he was as best as he could be with all things considered; that is, if one didn't take into account his head injury. Her eyes lingered fitfully at his temple where even now there seemed to be blood pooling against the newly wrapped gauze.
A sudden horror filled her when she realized that she had forgotten something, once again. But this wasn't some minor blunder, she brooded, irritated with herself.
She had yet to interrogate the doctor for a comprehensive overview of his current condition.
What if, she swallowed, what if the accident tampered with his memory again? How would Kesumi handle being forgotten a second time?
Think later, she frowned, actually, let's just not think. Period.
A thorough raking of her lower lip later, she purchased enough sense from the corner of her mind that was still functioning to lock the door behind her and observe his injuries at a closer proximity.
He was unconscious for kami's sake, what the hell was she afraid of?
"Kai," she began, her voice brimming with emotion.
"Kai."
"Kai."
She realized with astonishment that her cheeks were wet and mused ridiculously that there must have been a hole in the ceiling. . .was it even raining outside? She absorbed the moisture with her hands impatiently.
"You have no idea how much I wanted to call you name like that. It's always been this way for me."
Tenchi hesitated; she was practically leaning over him now.
He was so close.
With fingers still tipped in her tears, she pressed her hands against his face ever so gently.
"Back then, when we were little. . . I knew that you saw me merely as your best friend's younger sister, and so you cared for me in your own way. But the way that I wanted you to see me was not the way you saw Kessy, do you know what I mean? I was so young then, and surely you must've seen through my naive crush on you. Honestly, a part of me actually wanted you to notice me. . . but you didn't. You never even looked my way once."
Her finger continued to draw tender circles against his cheek.
"And now, nothing's changed, because not only do you fail to notice me, you've eradicated me from your memory. I'm nothing to you now. But Kai, I want you to know that. . . . to me, you're always going to mean something."
A silent sob broke out through her slightly parted lips, and her fingers clenched where they rested on his chest.
"This is goodbye, Hiwatari. I want you to promise me that you and Kesumi will be happy. Purge all memories of the Abbey, of Biovolt, of Tala, of me. . .forever. That's the only way that you can be fully happy without your haunting past hanging on your conscience."
She gave his dormant face a watery smile.
"Don't you dare remember me, Kai Hiwatari. And it's really okay because I. . ." her voice died momentarily in her throat, but she was desperate to say this one last thing to him. Forcing the lump down her throat, she articulated again, "Because I'll always remember you."
Her hand slipped off his chest as she turned to exit his room and his life permanently, and would have, had Kai's firm hand around her wrist not halted her.
"Don't." He said softly, "don't go."
Muahahahahahahahahha FINISHED chapter 14. Aren't you all proud of me? I have produced a chapter farrrr longer than any of my previous instalments XD. In any case, I hope that that was satisfactory and that if not the contents then the length compensated for the long wait I have subjected all of you guys to! TT;; Thank you for sticking with me all this time.