Author: Ashley
Title: Naked Jealousy
Rating: T
Part: 1/1
Pairing: Mon-El and Kara Danvers (Zor-El)
Word Count: 4,403
Summary: "She was jealous of everything she saw here and knew that she couldn't have. She was jealous because she knew she always had to hold herself back; to pull herself down to the human level in order to fit in." - Kara is upset about Mon-El going on a date with Eve. She spends the night drinking and Mon-El takes her home. Post 2x11: The Martian Chronicles.
Disclaimer: I don't own Supergirl, DC Comics or anything related to such things. The ideas, dialogue and plot points here were inspired by the show, but they are my own. Plagiarism isn't nice. Please don't steal my ideas.
A/N: Hi all!
Another week, another fic! No smut this time tho - sorry everyone, but my "completed" smut-fic pile has ended. I've been busy working on a karamel multi-chap that's literally and totally by accident taken over my life. Once that's finished, I'll better be able to concentrate on new fics. Time to get typing up them drafts! (ahhhhh I need more hours in the day!)
Here's a piece I wrote right after 2x11: The Martian Chronicles, but didn't finish in time before 2x12: Luthors aired. Since the show went in a slightly different direction, I decided not to post it. But now that it's hiatus and we're all looking for more karamel, I figured I'd post it anyway.
Please let me know what you think! I write so much smut, sometimes I wonder if my PG/T rated stuff is up to par LOL.
Kara often found herself jealous.
She was jealous of normal families at the park having picnics together. She was jealous of workers at the office who got promotions. She was jealous of couples strolling down the street holding hands. She was jealous of all the people who were just so well put together every day of their lives and could manage to succeed in all the different areas of life at once.
Don't get it wrong though: Kara had had a great life since coming to Earth. She had loving substitute parents and she still has one of the best sisters in the universe, but she had lost so much when her planet exploded.
She was jealous of everything she saw here and knew that she couldn't have. She was jealous because she knew she always had to hold herself back; to pull herself down to the human level in order to fit in. And once she'd made the decision to become Supergirl, she was so busy dealing with what came along with that, that she couldn't excel in other areas of her life.
But what she found herself most jealous over lately was definitely relationship related.
Everywhere she went, people were kissing, gossiping about their night with their significant other, making date plans and talking about engagements.
All things that she knew that she'd never have.
She thought briefly that maybe James could give that to her. She had been hopeful, but the more she thought about it, the more she realized that it wasn't realistic; it wasn't a tangible dream. It was a crush that, once realized, didn't really mean all that much to her, not in the same way that it used to and not in the same way that her friendship with him had meant to her.
Maybe it was the chase she had liked? Or maybe once she was finally able to be with him, she realized that there was only so much that they could be. He was human, after all. So she found herself appreciating the friendship and support that James could provide her with, more so than just the potential half-hearted relationship they'd only ever be able to achieve.
So she stuck with the idea that she couldn't have those things; the romantic relationship and all that came with it. Especially when she could provide so much more of herself to the world as Supergirl.
But then she met Mon-El.
As soon as she found him she'd felt it - that feeling was back. That nervous twinge in her gut, the fluttering in her chest. Though he'd initially attacked her and she'd freaked out that he was from Daxam, a part of her had known that he could be everything she'd wanted; everything that she had been missing. The second she had seen that Kryptonian pod, she had been filled with hope.
But she was scared.
As much as she was jealous of those humans who were able to maintain a relationship, she was scared of being hurt. She was scared of investing the time, like she did with James, but at a deeper level; a level where she may fall too hard too fast and then lose it all.
And just when she realized that that was ridiculous; that Mon-El felt the same way about her that she did about him; that she was so close to getting what she truly wanted...it all crashed and burned.
And that's why she found herself in the alien bar tonight. Alone.
And Kara never drank. Never.
Okay, well, rarely.
For one, alcohol had little, if any, effect on her so she didn't much see the point past social drinking. But also, Kara liked control.
She liked to know what to expect.
She liked to know how to handle it.
She liked to know where she stood in a situation.
And when Mon-El had told her how he felt that night in her apartment, his eyes catching hers, his voice tinted with sadness, it flipped her control on its head. She wasn't ready to hear his confession. It was unexpected and it caught her off guard and the things he was saying were so huge, so meaningful to him - she just wasn't ready.
At first, she didn't have any idea why he was at her apartment. It had been a rough day and the last thing on her mind was her romantic feelings towards a certain Daxamite that she had tried so hard to push deep down inside of her.
He was a Daxamite.
That wasn't why she pushed him away. She was accepting of that. She knew she was.
But, she also knew of the traditional male Daxamite reputation with women. They were a wild and promiscuous people, to say the least. And that's where her fear stemmed from.
Mon-El was alone here on this planet. As far as they knew, he was the only Daxamite left in the universe and the only really close friend he had was Kara.
Maybe his feelings weren't real. Maybe he just thought they were.
Sure, he was attracted to her. She was to him as well. But maybe he only thought he was feeling these feelings because she was helping him; she was taking care of him. She was always around him and maybe he was just confusing his attraction to her with deeper romantic feelings.
She couldn't take the chance. She couldn't give up her control and throw caution to the wind and jump into a relationship with him.
What she had told the White Martian Alex was true. She was scared of being abandoned again. And right now, she was scared to let herself feel these feelings for Mon-El only to have him go back to his old ways and change his mind later; later once she had gotten invested, once she had really fallen.
It had been less than 24 hours and he'd already gone out on a date with Eve Tessmacher for Rao's sake!
So she continued to sit here in the bar, two or three alien strength drinks deep (she couldn't quite remember), participating in the traditional "drowning of sorrows" because she had been abandoned by Mon-El before they'd even started anything.
Stupid Mon-El.
This was all his fault.
He'd been watching her for three hours.
Okay, that sounds a little creepy.
He'd actually been working his shift for three hours and he had noticed that she was here sitting alone early on in his night.
He'd been keeping an eye on her. He didn't think she'd even noticed him. She was so...distracted by her thoughts. He had watched her drink three of those strong as hell drinks as she sat there with that awful scowl on her face.
He was really worried about her, but his fear of that scowl is what kept him standing behind the bar.
"Barkeep?!" She suddenly shouted loudly and it made him jump. He let out a heavy breath when he noticed that she had shouted it at one of the female bartenders walking by her table.
"I'll have another," she hiccupped as she shook her current empty glass in the air.
"Coming right up," she smiled as she walked toward Mon-El for the order.
He shook his head at the bartender before, "I got it, Tammy," as he nodded in Kara's direction.
"Sure, whatever," Tammy nodded with a shrug as she continued to walk the floor.
He grabbed a glass and filled it before heading over to Kara's table.
A glass of clear bubbly liquid slid in front of Kara, a lime wedge hanging from the rim. Kara eyed it confusedly.
"Don't think I ordered this..." she trailed off in a contemplative voice.
"You didn't, but I'm cutting you off of the alien stuff. That's club soda."
"But I don't want club soda," she stated. Her eyebrows furrowed as she looked up at the bartender, scoffing obnoxiously when she noticed it was Mon-El.
"What are you doing here?"
"I work here, remember?" he chuckled at her.
She scoffed at him again. He sat down across from her in the booth.
"Kara, what's going on? Why are you here...alone…and drinking?"
She scoffed without answering him. That seemed to be her new favourite sound to make...
"Okay, I'm taking you home," he announced. "Let's go," he said as he stood from the booth, taking a hold of her elbow.
She shrugged his hand off and she huffed at him. As if she were going anywhere with him.
"Kara," he tried again, "you're cut off. Come on, we're going." His hand returned to her arm, gently urging her up. "Come on, please?"
She sighed heavily, slamming her hands on the table in front of her as she stabled herself enough to stand. "Fiiiiine," she whined out at him.
He waved at Tammy near the bar and pointed at Kara with a shrug. Tammy nodded with a shrug of her own, understanding that he was likely not coming back and she didn't seem to care. His shift was over in half an hour anyway.
She was placing most of her weight on Mon-El, her fingers clutching at his shirt as she stumbled alongside him through the parking lot.
They had barely made it a few feet when she stopped abruptly, eyes slamming shut. He swung around to face her, his hands landing on her upper arms.
"Spinning," she whispered to him.
He nodded, "Yeah, I bet."
He reached down, an arm at her waist, another hooking behind her knees as he lifted her into his arms.
"I'll just carry you there," he said against her cheek as she moved to lie her head on his shoulder. "It'll be way faster."
In reality, he likely did it because he wanted the opportunity to hold her and to take care of her without her putting up a fight about it. Not that he'd ever say that out loud.
At least, not anymore; not after she had turned him down.
"Mhm," she mumbled, her eyes fluttering closed.
He quickly sped back to her apartment and soon enough, was standing outside the door. He looked down at her now sleeping form. He needed to find her keys. Her small purse was across her body, trapped between his abdomen and her side. He leaned back slightly, stabling her weight as he tried to get one of his hands in between them.
Her eyes popped open suddenly. "What're you doing?" Her thoughts were clear, but her words were slurred as she shouted at him.
"We're here. I need your key," he shrugged, some of her hair falling into her eyes with his movements.
"You can be res-respectful and ask me for it," she slurred boldly as she tried to climb out of his grasp.
"What?" He eyed her, "you were just sleep-ugh, never mind. Can I have your key, please?" He asked with an eye roll.
"Put me down," she demanded as she attempted once again to jump free. He obeyed and slid her feet to the floor.
She shuffled through her purse for a long moment before coming up with a key ring. She held it up to her face and looked at the three or four keys on the ring, trying to make a decision as to which was the right one.
He cleared his throat and she finally decided. She eyed him with a scowl as she turned to the door lock, her next challenge being actually unlocking it.
Mon-El stood there patiently as she missed the keyhole a couple of times before succeeding in unlocking the door. He held it open for her as she stumbled inside the apartment, the heel of her shoe getting caught on the threshold before she huffed and kicked the offending thing off.
He followed her closely, making sure that she didn't trip and break anything (which was much more likely than her actually getting hurt), his arms out and ready to stabilize her if needed. She kicked off her remaining shoe and sighed.
"Okay, Kara, let's get you into bed."
She spun around to face him. "I beg your pardon!" she shouted loudly, probably louder than she intended to as she cringed at her own words.
Mon-El rolled his eyes at her. "To sleep, Kara. You need to sleep it off." He instructed, a hand finding its way to her lower back, gently turning her and guiding her in the right direction.
"I'm fiiiine, Mon-El," she insisted. "Just a little floaty s'all." She smiled a toothy grin at him.
"I know," he laughed.
"I'm not tired anyways."
He arched an eyebrow, "You were literally asleep in my arms less than five minutes ago."
"I'm not tired anymore," she shrugged.
"But you'll be happy later if you go to bed now."
She furrowed her eyebrows at him, seemingly considering his suggestion. "Nah."
"Okay, fine, whatever. I'll just leave you to it." He clapped his hands together as he shrugged. "I guess I should probably head back to work and finish up my shift then."
"Nooooo," she whined. "Stay! We can..." she looked around the room quickly as she stumbled a bit, her head movements causing her to lose some of her balance. "We can watch TV! Or-or play board games! I can teach you how! It's easy," she smiled, excitement clearly visible on her face as she reached her hands out towards him.
He stared at her as he took her hands. "You're not capable of playing board games right now, never mind teaching me how to play them. I'm surprised you're even standing up."
He eyed her cautiously. She was standing up, but her body was moving in small circles. "Uh, come to think of it, let's at least sit down," he smiled worriedly at her. She huffed as she moved toward the sofa. She sat down dramatically, bouncing with her arms stretched out at her sides. He followed suit, about a foot of space between them.
There was silence as he paused to think about how he was going to trick her into sleeping it off when-
"So, how was your date with little Miss Tessmacher?" She asked abruptly, annoyance clear in her tone.
He raised an eyebrow at her, "Fine. It was just lunch."
Kara nodded in response.
"Nothing special really. She's nice."
"I'm sure she is." Kara wiggled her eyebrows at him and was mad at herself for doing so.
"She wasn't that nice, Kara."
But there was a moment where all Kara could see was Eve on that table at CatCo, her skirt hiked up around her hips, Mon-El standing between her legs with his belt and fly undone.
And that was at work! The first day that they had even met! No doubt there was a repeat performance yesterday during or after their "lunch". She wouldn't be surprised at all.
"We talked a bit, but there wasn't really much to say. We don't have a ton of things in common," he shrugged his shoulders as his eyes fell to the zipper at the bottom of his jacket as he tugged on it. "I find that…well when I talk with humans, I have to spend most of my time being careful about what I'm saying. You know...so I don't tip them off to the fact that I'm an alien."
Kara nodded her head, seemingly absentmindedly. He wasn't sure if she was paying any attention to him at all.
"So when are you gonna see her again?"
Clearly she was in fact not paying attention.
"What'd you mean?"
"A date. Aren't you gonna go on another date with her? Good old Date Number Two?"
He shook his head with a laugh. "Why do you care? At least this way, I'll be out of your hair, right? You can go on...not liking me or whatever and continue living your life."
"Of course I care, Mon-El!" She shouted exasperatedly. "I've cared about you since the second you got to this planet." She was shaking her head, her crinkle catching his eye. She looked troubled.
"Is there a problem with me dating someone, Kara? If you care so much about me, you should want me to be happy, right?" Earth situations confused him.
"Of course I have a problem with it!" She had said it as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
His eyes searched hers. She was staring at him and her eyes looked tired. Tired, but confident in what she was saying.
"I don't understand, Kara," he stated, his eyes closing as his face briefly fell into his palm. "You said you didn't like me, and now you're angry I went out with Eve? Don't you want me to date other people? Isn't that kind of the point of moving on?"
"But, I don't want you to move on," she said matter-of-factly, her voice cracking.
He lifted his head to look at her and there were tear stains on her cheeks. How did that even happen so quickly? He thought she was a happy drunk...
"I lied, dummy! I was lying to you when I said that!" She threw her hands in the air, signalling that this was also an obvious fact that he should have clued into.
"But-"
"I like you, Mon-El. A lot. For a long time." He just stared at her. "Like, I like like you," she continued.
His eyes widened and he shook his head in disbelief.
"So you lied about how you felt about me because..."
"I was scared, Mon-El. I was scared of you and the way that you make me feel and the way that you just got here and-and threw my whole world upside down," she ended in a whisper as she sniffled.
His hands went up to her face, one pushing her hair behind her ear, the other wiping at the tears on her cheek.
"Kara," he laughed, "Don't cry."
"I can't help it!" she shouted and it made him jump.
Note to self: Kara's drinking leads to random mood swings.
"Kara, I think you're tired and the alcohol is making your brain fuzzy and confused. I have a feeling that you're going to be upset tomorrow when you realize that you said all this to me." He stood from the sofa as he grabbed a hold of her hands. "Come with me and we'll put you into bed and you'll-"
"Mon-El," she growled. "I don't want to sleep."
"Not sleep," he corrected. "We'll just relax in your bedroom," he shrugged.
She eyed him suspiciously. "Fine," she agreed and he tugged at her hands, pulling her into a standing position.
"There we go," he spun around, his hands finding her back and nudging her forward and towards her bedroom.
Once they had crossed the threshold, she started up again. "I don't know what you see in that girl, Mon-El."
"What? You mean Eve?"
"She's nothing like you," she shrugged off her cardigan as she spoke. Mon-El grabbed it midair before it hit the floor.
"Nobody's like me, Kara. That's kinda the problem," he sighed as he faced a nearby chair, shaking out the sweater and leaning it on the chair's arm.
She tugged at the ends of her t-shirt and she pulled it over her head. Mon-El turned around just in time to see the shirt hit the floor. His eyes widened at her. "Kara," it came out as a warning, but it wasn't a strong one.
"I'm like you," she insisted with a yawn, the rounded nails of her fingertips scratching at the skin pressed against the underwire of her now very clearly visible lacy bra. "Actually, my powers are stronger than yours, so I guess I'm better than you," she giggled.
Her hands fell down to the button on her jeans and Mon-El jumped forward, his hands stopping hers.
She blinked up at him.
"I think we should keep our clothes on," he suggested as he nodded repeatedly.
She sighed dramatically. "First you want me to sleep, then you want me to keep my clothes on. Make up your mind!" She shook her hands, knocking his loose from hers.
"You can sleep with your clothes on," he assured her.
She stepped away from him and turned towards the bed, her hands returning to the button.
He reached down to pick up the t-shirt she'd dropped to the floor near his feet. When he straightened up all he could think was naked.
Well not naked naked, but those panties left very little to the imagination.
"Kara!" he shouted. She stumbled as she tried to kick her jeans off her ankles, bending over to tug them past her feet. His hands went to cover his eyes as her behind wiggled in front of him. "Please," he whined, "you need to keep your clothes on."
She straightened up and spun around to look at him. "Why? You've moved on remember? This shouldn't bother you." She stepped closer to him, her hands reaching up to grab his wrists, pulling his hands from his eyes. His eyes remained closed and she huffed at him.
"Why won't you look at me?" she questioned, her voice upset.
"Kara," he breathed as he felt her place his hands on her hips, his fingertips running across the waistband of her panties even though he told them not to.
"I'm sorry I pushed you away," he felt more than heard her whisper it against him.
"Kara, I want you so bad..."
"And you can have me," she whispered as she leaned in to him, her lips pressing softly against his.
He pulled away quickly, one hand grasping tightly at her hip, the other forming a fist against her, struggling to keep himself from pulling her to him. "I can't, Kara. You're drunk and you don't know what you're saying."
"I know exactly what I'm saying," she stated defensively as she stepped away from him.
His eyes popped open when he felt her move away. She turned to her bed, grabbed a set of pyjamas that were lying on top of the pillow and proceeded to put them on, but not before he watched her bra go flying across the room.
Mon-El let out a sigh of relief when she was finally fully clothed. He didn't think he had any powers when it came to pushing away Kara while she was kissing him. Definitely not if she were that close to being naked…
"Can you turn off the lights?" She asked quietly as she turned out the comforter. He nodded.
"Do you need anything before I go?" He asked as he moved, turning to flip the lamps off in the room.
She looked over at him, "But I want you to stay."
He turned back around, their eyes connecting in the darkness. "What?"
"I'm drunk. You need to take care of me," she pouted.
He smiled at her. "Actually, you sound a lot more coherent now. I don't think you're all that drunk anymore."
"Yes I am!" she insisted loudly. "Stay."
He held up his hands in surrender. "Okay, okay, you're drunk. I get it. You win. I'll stay."
Not like he needed much convincing.
She slid into bed and he could see her smiling in the darkness. He shrugged off his jacket and kicked off his shoes. He walked toward the opposite side of the bed, tugging at the covers.
"You're not sleeping in here with your pants on..." she stated, her voice hitting a warning tone.
"What?" he asked surprised. "Why not?"
"Because," she said simply as she slid onto her side, her back facing him.
"That doesn't even make sense…" he whispered as he rolled his eyes, tugged off his pants and tried to ignore the way his heartbeat sped up when he crawled into bed next to her.
He stared at her back, willing his breathing and heart to calm down. She abruptly spun around, lying on her side and now facing him and it made him jump.
"I think you should kiss me," she stated boldly.
His eyes widened. "Kara, I don't think that's a good idea." Geez, drunk Kara really threw away her inhibitions.
"I'm not really even drunk anymore."
He laughed as his hand lifted from under the covers and pushed a lock of hair away from her face. Her eyes fluttered closed and she hummed.
"Yeah, sure you're not."
"I'm not," she whispered, clearly fading.
"Ask me to kiss you tomorrow," he whispered as he placed a kiss to her forehead. "I'll do it when I know you're sober and you mean it."
He was pretty sure she didn't even wait for his response; her eyes were closed and her breathing smooth. He smiled. He was dying to kiss her, but he knew he shouldn't. And if everything she'd said tonight was actually true, he wouldn't need to worry. He'd be with her and be kissing her soon enough.
He felt the sun warm on his face and he stretched, his hand colliding with a solid body underneath the covers. His eyes flew open and he found himself face to face with Kara, her eyes blue and bright and staring back at him.
"Ow," she feigned injury with a smile as her own hand pushed his away from her abdomen.
"Sorry," he spoke, his voice scratchy. "I forgot where I was for a minute there..."
She smirked, "Clearly."
"Morning," he smiled.
"Morning," she blushed. After a pause, "Thank you for putting up with me last night." He nodded at her. "I never drink that much, that's for sure."
"Your head hurt?" he questioned and she shook hers.
"Nah. Usually it does only for about ten minutes or so and then the hangover wears off."
He nodded, his eyes wandering away as he settled deeper into the pillow.
"So are you gonna kiss me know or what?" His eyes shot to hers and she was looking at him so innocently he wasn't sure if he'd imagined her saying it.
Then a grin broke out on her face and it made his heart hammer in his chest as he leaned in to fulfill her request, her lips soft and pliant against his.
His hand slid to her hip under the covers and hers threaded through his hair and he knew that he could definitely get used to this.
End.