Episode 009: Image of Rehabilitation

"You want me to take him to Porlyusica?" Makarov questioned as he sat on the guild's front desk. It was still early in the morning before the guild had officially opened its doors, leaving only the Guild Master and Mira there to get things started for the day. "What's brought this on?"

"Because Ragna seemed pretty annoyed yesterday by several problems that the handicap put him through; he even mentioned that he'd been through something similar to this before," Mira informed. "If it's been healed before, then it shouldn't be a problem for someone of Porlyusica's ability to fix his arm and eye."

"That's a reasonable assumption, but what did he have to say about this?" the older man questioned.

"Well he-"

"AHHHH! ICE WATER! FREEZING! SO FRIGGEN' COLD! WHO EVEN SHOWERS LIKE THIS!?" Both Mira and Makarov looked towards the Guild's showers where they'd heard Ragna's screams coming from.

"Did he stay here last night?"

"I offered him one of the beds. He came back late last night after being insulted most of the day due to looking old, handling a difficult job that had been misleading and made harder with the fact that he couldn't use his right eye or arm, insulted again due to looking old while his employer refused to pay for his work, and coming back on a night train using the last of his money and leaving him completely broke."

"...This all happened yesterday?" the guild leader asked.

"Also we figured out that he only looks so old is because one of his eyes is constantly closed, so I think that's all the more reason he needs to be looked at," Mira finished. "I haven't told him about this yet, I thought it would be best to tell you about my idea first. But I'm a little surprised you haven't taken him there by now."

"It was always my plan to take him there, but I wanted him to wait a bit first. That right arm of his is still a mystery to us and there's no telling what might happen if we managed to reactivate its powers. I've only held off until now to judge his motivation and character… the former I still haven't the faintest idea of." Makarov seemed hesitant.

"Master, is the only reason you're holding off because you don't want to go in for your check up?" Mira accused, causing Makarov to flinch. "In fact, I think you were supposed to see Porlyusica right before you left for the Guild Master's Meeting."

"I… I mean… I would have if… if it wasn't for all of the chaos the guild was causing! That's right! I needed to make sure I kept you whippersnappers in line so I didn't get written up by the Magic Counsel again!"

Mira wasn't buying that.

"Master, until you go in for both your checkup and have Ragna's eye and arm looked at, I'm not letting you have any drinks." It might've just been his growth magic, but Makarov's jaw slammed to the floor at that little threat. "In fact, I'm pretty sure I can get everyone else in town to stop serving you if-"

"Fine! Fine! You win! I'll take him today! Right after he showers even!" Makarov conceded. Even if he was the official Master, at times Mira could show she had more power here than she'd normally let on. "You kids…"

"Only want what's best for you, master," Mirajane told him with her usual bright smile… though the old man had difficulty not seeing the demoness behind it.

Later -Easter Forests-

"You going to tell me where we're going?" Ragna asked curtly as he followed behind the Guild Leader. "I get that Mira said I needed to follow after you, but I doubt that anything out here would be much of a threat to you."

"You don't think you're here just because I wanted some company on my walk?" Makarov asked as the two passed through a section of deep overgrowth.

"If you had, you wouldn't have called on me; probably would've asked someone with killer thighs and a big bust instead." 'And those aren't exactly a rarity in our guild,' the Grim Reaper admitted. "Stop the games and throw me a bone here. I'm not a fan of being kept in the dark."

"Your tone tells me that you're still used to it," Makarov guessed, leading Ragna to give his good green eye a massive roll. "We're going to see someone by the name of Porlyusica; she's an old friend of mine and a gifted healer for the guild. With any luck she'll manage to find a way to restore your eye and arm to its former state."

"You serious?" Ragna asked as he glanced down at his paralyzed right arm that was still being held within the folds of his jacket. "This have something to do with yesterday?"

"It does; poor Mirajane was nearly in tears after seeing what you went through," Makarov teased him, hoping to see Ragna's reaction. The Reaper only gave an annoyed sigh as he shook his head. "...Or you can consider this your reward for helping to stop the Eisenwald guild's plot to murder the guild leaders."

"I wasn't thinking that I was getting a reward for that," he admitted. "Did everyone get something for that, or am I the only one that gets a reward?"

"Even if everyone that participated did have the choice of obtaining a reward, I think we'd both agree that they'd rather see you rehabilitated." Ragna didn't have it in him to deny what his Guild Master was saying. "Looks like we're here."

The two approached a small clearing leading up to a giant tree that had been carved into for living arrangement. Standing at the front of the steps was an older woman with pink hair and red robes. She'd been sweeping as the two approached, but quickly turned to them with a scowl.

"You're late," she said with ire to Mokorov. "If I hadn't seen you again it wouldn't have been an issue… had you not made that inconvenient promise to return."

'...This is the chick that's supposed to heal me? She's looking at us like we're the scum of the earth,' Ragna thought to himself, though he remained silent for now. 'Weird, I'm getting a strange feeling just by being around her… but it's not like when I was fighting Lullabye, it's… different somehow.'

"And him," she said, looking directly at Ragna for a long while. "It seems you want me to heal him as well. You're always asking for more than you should."

"If you'd like, we can postpone my checkup and you can focus on healing Ragna here," Makarov offered, only for the older woman glare to be directed back at him. "Just a suggestion…"

"Don't think I can't see what you're trying to do!" she yelled at him. "You just don't want to hear that you need to limit your drinking! Every time you come here I keep having to tell you the exact same thing! And to think that humans even make that vile swil! They're practically ingesting poison! The idiots!"

'Damn, she's heated,' Ragna realized. "Hey old man, just get it over with will ya? You go getting her pissed off and she'll tear me to shreds when she's looking at me."

"I'm right here!" Porlyusca shouted with fire in her eye, an attitude that wasn't reflected well by her current age. Ragna didn't bother acknowledging this, only leaning against a nearby tree and summoning a book to his possession to kill time. "HEY!"

"On second though, you both have a point," Makarov said, though in reality he did this because he knew that he should keep Ragna's time here short; if he didn't, Ragna and Porlyusca would soon be at each other's throats. Heading into the healer's tree home, Porlyusca only gave Ragna one final scowl before she followed her old friend. Closing the door behind them, she looked at the oldened wizard.

"You really want him healed when he possesses an arm coated in such a malicious darkness?" she questioned as she went over to her desk to gather supplies for Makarov's check up. "Even if I can't sense any magic in it, reactivating such a thing would likely lead to travesty."

"Hence why it's taken me so long to bring him to you in the first place, but the kind words from his peers tells me that isn't his intention… crass as he can be at times," the elderly wizard said as he took his coat off. "Besides, he's made it clear that he's used that arm before. I can only imagine he's grown used to the power it carries with time."

"Perhaps because he's practiced using it before," Porlyusca reasonably guessed. "Has he even told you what it does?"

"He hasn't… but to be fair I've yet to ask him," Makarov sighed. "If this reveals itself to be a mistake, I'll of course take full responsibility and fix it myself. I can only hope the issue doesn't go that far and have faith in Ragna."

"A human having faith in another human… how utterly ridiculous," the healer chided. "By the way, you need to limit yourself on alcohol."

"But you haven't even looked at me yet!" the guild master protested.

"I know… but it's so obvious that I don't have to."

-And then!-

'Don't like the idea of stripping in front of those glaring eyes, but I guess I don't have much of a choice,' Ragna thought as he started removing his jacket. "Hey, my upper body is the only part that's affected. Is it okay if I stop there?"

"I insist that you do; I don't want to look at any more of you than I have to," Porlyusca told him. "In fact-"

"You'd rather not look at me at all," Ragna finished as he removed his coat and placed it on the nearby chair. "Your insults aren't very creative, you know?"

Whack!

Ragna growled as he rubbed the sore spot on his forehead that had just been slammed with a rather heavy book. His supposed healer had already turned away to start her prep work. If this had been the old Ragna (meaning the previous one, not the one being called old) he might've yelled at her with a collection of his own insults, but now he'd learned to hold his temper a bit better… and she seemed saner than some of the others via comparison.

"Just one request," he began as he threw the jacket off and started undoing his hakama top. "No needles if you can help it."

"Scared of a little medical equipment? For all of your tough talk you're not as brave as you appear."

"It's not that…" the Reaper told her darkly. "...Just got some bad memories associated with those things."

'Bad memories? Is that some indirect confession that he's subjected his own body to drug abuse?' Porlyusca thought before she turned and saw the fully shirtless Ragna. 'No, that can't be. If he truly did abuse drugs his body wouldn't be in such peak condition like it is now, his eye and arm exempt. And there's no sign of needle holes on his…' "Your left arm… that doesn't seem to be natural either."

"Huh, color me impressed. You're the first person in a while that's managed to see that," Ragna told her, though he honestly seemed pretty relaxed. "Yeah, lost this one too… though I guess circumstances were better."

"Tch, you can speak with whatever foolish pride you want; you've still lost a part of your body," the medic said. "Though if you've managed to replace one arm this way and keep it working, why not cut your losses and replace the other?"

"Decent question, but I'm afraid I just don't know the technique," he admitted while shaking his head. "Even then, the materials that had been created weren't exactly… moral. I could stomach using 'em because they were basically leftovers, but I'm not keen on finding more of the stuff."

"You humans and your stupid secrets, such bringers of ruin," Porlyusca insulted with a scowl. "Half of this world's conflicts could be avoided if you didn't feel the need to keep such knowledge to yourself, but the other half is just a result of your ignorant and selfish natures."

"...You seem to have a lot of insults to give humanity, Almost like you don't consider yourself human," Ragna noted with a roll of his good eye… right before he felt the stinging blow of a book being thrown at his forehead. "OW! HEY!"

"DON'T YOU DARE PUT ME IN THE SAME BOAT AS YOU! DIYOU THINK I'M AS IGNORANT OR SELF DESTRUCTIVE!? AND AFTER I'M BEING FORCED TO HEAL YOU!"

"OW! LEAVE IT BE YOU OLD BAT! YOU'RE JUST MAKING IT SO THAT THERE'S MORE YOU HAVE TO HEAL!"

"YOU'VE BROUGHT THIS ON YOURSELF! WHO SAYS I'LL HEAL YOU AFTER AN INSULT LIKE THAT YOU BRUTE!?"

"DAMN HAG!"

"VULCAN HEADED BARBARIAN!"

"GODDAMN GRANNY!"

"FILTHY! HUMAN!"

"...In hindsight I should have seen this coming," Makarov muttered to himself as he looked over the centerfold section of Sorcerer's Weekly, ogling the bikini clad wizards to keep his mind off the current stress he was being dealt.

Though it certainly took a while for the two to end their heated… discussion, eventually Ragna was forced to sit down while Porlyusica looked at his exposed body. Considering what the Reaper was there for, he found it slightly odd that she wasn't paying attention to his paralyzed arm itself and instead seemed to be focusing on his body around it. She also made an occasion cut on Ragna's body with a medical knife and watched carefully as it healed before her while gathering small bits of blood samples to gather information. Though she didn't use a syringe like she'd promised, she did poke around on Ragna's skin for a bit and felt out his muscles and tendons. She of course looked over his paralyzed eye as well, but there didn't seem to be much interest towards it.

"So?" Ragna asked once his examination had ended, wasting no time in getting his clothes back on. "What's the word Doc?"

"Annoyingly I haven't been able to figure out how that arm of yours works. The matter its made of doesn't seem to follow any of the basic rules of alchemy or material based magic, and I don't have the slightest idea how it's supposed to be activated or powered… though I can easily see it isn't anything good."

"Relax; the old method is impossible for me to use now… I'm fairly certain." He had to admit that last part since he didn't know too much regarding the inner workings of this world… and a certain demonic artifact had certainly seemed to set it off. "So is this a bust then?"

"Hardly, but it won't be easy," she told him as she headed over to her desk and started writing. "This explanation would go over your head, but suffice to say I think I have a method that will allow you to move it as a regular arm. With practice, you might even manage to channel magic through it."

"I'll be able to channel magic through it?" Ragna asked with amazement while his coat readjusted itself to properly hold the paralyzed arm. "Are you saying it'll be back up to full strength?"

"No, because I have no way of reactivating the magical force that sleeps within it. What you can learn to do is fight with that as if it were your other arm and channel your own magic through it just as easily as your other hand. That's the best I'm able to offer you." 'And willing. Even with Makarov's word, that darkness hiding in him is too unsettling… and I can't shake the feeling that something is very wrong.'

"What about my eye? Is that gonna get fixed too?"

"Completely restored, though it's going to remain that unnatural shade of red."

"That's fine, not fond of green anyway," Ragna thought, remembering what sort of trouble the color usually meant for him. "Talk to me, what are we looking at as the method for healing my arm?"

"You should be grateful; I don't think anyone else could have found this method, let alone know how to apply it to an unusual body like yours," Porluysica told him before handing over the piece of paper she'd written on. "Gather these and I'll be able to prepare an Elixir for your arm."

"An elixir?" Ragna mused, having heard the term being used in his world… though most claims of their potency had been greatly exaggerated. "...How's it work?"

"I already told you, the explanation would just go over your head."

"Won't know until you tell me, and I think I deserve to know what you're trying to do to my body," the Reaper protested. "Make it as basic as you want, just give me something to go off of."

"...You have the worst way of asking someone for help you desperately need," the pink haired woman sighed, knowing Ragna's type of stubborn well enough by now. "The potion has two main effects. The first is basic enough and I'd only need a single of those ingredients; all it's going to do is reactivate the nervous system connected to your eye."

'From what Mira told me, it's the damn eye that's making everyone think I'm so old in the first place. Should I just go for that first?' "...And what about my arm? How's that going to work?"

"By creating a false nervous system inside… whatever that is," she insulted, pointing to the paralyzed BlazBlue. "The sheer density of that material makes it seem like it can't be reformed, but with this potion I'll be able to make the necessary adjustments that will allow you to control it even when it's not powered by its usual method. In fact, I'd wager that your connection would be nearly as close as it used to be."

'False nervous system? I don't like the sound of that,' Ragna thought with something of a scowl. 'With the arm inactive I'd be fine trying to move it around, but if it reactivates and my connection is that close with it there could be problems… But I've kept that power from running out of control before, I'll do it again if I have to.' Though a bit hesitant, Ragna grabbed the recipe and started looking over what he needed to find. "Any idea where I need to start looking?"

"That's on you to figure out, I've already done most of the work for you," Porlyusica told him before pointing towards the door. "You've been here long enough."

"I guess you're right; no reason why we'd both have to suffer here," the Reaper agreed with a cocky smirk that his healer didn't care for, but she didn't protest it either. "So how am I supposed to pay you back for this? Or do you not take payment from my kind?"

"I've no use for whatever you'd consider wealth, just take your time in finding those ingredients so I don't have to see you again for a good while," she insulted as her patient opened the door.

"Tch, well you're not exactly easy on the eyes yourself granny. In fact it's probably the only time I'm glad I've only gotta look at something with one eye."

Still keeping the smirk on his face, Ragna quickly shut the door to block the stack of books the medic had thrown his way. Heading away from the tree, a collection of swearing and insults towards humanity as a whole followed him.

'First time in a while I've witnessed someone trade verbal blows with Porlyusica,' Makarov thought to himself as he rose from where he'd been seated and began following the Reaper back to the guild. "Seems that you've got a lot of work ahead for you."

"You've got no idea," he responded gruffly as he continued looking over his list. '...I don't know what any of these are.'

-Later at the Fairy Tail Guild!-

"This is one very expensive shopping list," Levi, a blue haired member of the guild said as she looked over the list Ragna had brought back and compared it to several of the books she'd taken from Fairy Tail's library. "And some of these are going to be harder to find than others. Ignoring prices for the moment, only six of these are available in Magnolia's Markets meaning you'd have to do some travelling in order to find the other seven."

"Not what I want to hear when I'm completely broke," Ragna muttered as he prepared food, cooking up some fried rice, meat skewers, and other choice dishes. "That's just going to make this whole damn thing take longer."

"Well you can eat all of your meals and sleep at the guild until we get everything figured out," Mira offered as she waited tables and brought out the food that Ragna had prepared. "It's the least we can do for your help around the guild, so don't worry about that for a while."

"Thanks, that'll at least save me a little cash. The problem's going to be finding ways to get around; bein' broke right at the start is going to be a real pain in the ass no matter how you slice it. Maybe I should just spend today doing local jobs to gather up the cash so I can take the train."

"Might be a smart move," Levi told him. "I've only looked at the first few of the ingredients and it's already going to be leading off in different directions from the guild."

"Mean I won't be able to get all of them in on trip," Ragna groaned. "This is starting to turn into a pain in the ass."

"If it's such a big pain, why not borrow some money from us?" Natsu asked as he tore a bite off a comically large bone of meat. "Saves you a day with all of your money problems, right?"

"Aye!" the blue cat Happy agreed as he chowed down on a full tuna.

"Thanks for the offer, but I'd rather not be in debt to anyone. Not even you guys," Ragna was a bit reluctant at that last part.

"You wouldn't be owing us anything at all, besides you needed the money for those few small jobs we did together like I said you would," Lucy told him with her hands on her hips as she tried to look authoritative to her current father figure.

"And if it's such a big deal, then why not just have everyone gather all of the materials at once?" Gray offered. "If you let us help you like that, we could be done with this in a few days tops."

"Gray, your clothes," Cana reminded him as she took a long swig of the tankard Mira had brought out for her. Gray's reaction was that of his classic surprise as he stared down as his boxers only body.

"I mean…" Ragna started. "You guys make good points, but-"

"This is just something that a man has to do on his own," Elfman interrupted. "Ragna could take the easy way out here and he'd be done with it, but a real man doesn't leave his responsibilities to others merely when it suits him. He puts his foot down and gets it done himself despite the long drag he knows he's in for. This is for his benefit, so he's going to do it himself."

"...Okay, maybe not in so many words but close enough," Ragna admitted as he gave his pan fried rice a few more tosses.

"I can understand that you don't want to commit the rest of the guild to finding the materials, but if they're able to help you then I think you should appreciate that," Erza commented from where she sat and enjoyed her slice of strawberry cake.

"Maybe you should go for a compromise?" Mira suggested. "If you find a good high paying job that will put you near one of the ingredients you need and there's someone who's not busy, then why not take someone with you so you can both get the reward money?"

"...I mean I guess that's alright," Ragna admitted as he began plating up what he'd made. "But I'm still going to need a job to get decent cash to start with."

"Let me just take a quick look at the board, maybe I'll find a job that will put you in a good place to start with," Levi said as she grabbed the notes she'd taken and did just that. It didn't take her long to find what she was looking for. "I've got something, it's the perfect job!"

"That was quick," the Reaper muttered, admittedly a little impressed.

"Yeah, the job was just posted today so I'm sure that your luck is changing for the better!" Levi told him excitedly… somehow her just saying that caused a pit to form in the Reaper's stomach. "This job's great for what you need; high paying, the item you're after is part of the reward, and the transportation costs are already covered!"

"Sounds too good to be true," Ragna said with a narrowed eye. "What's the job?"

"It's just a simple escort job, all you need to do is escort a young noble's daughter back to their home estate via wagon! Easy as can be!" the blue haired mage told him like there wasn't a problem with that at all.

"...Beggars can't be choosers?" Mirajane tried to tell her coworker, though Ragna's deep groan made it clear she hadn't helped.

"Any real man would be able to handle this like it was nothing," was Elfman's input, though it was unclear whether he was saying that because he expected that Ragna would be able to take this hurdle or that he was challenging him to do so."

"Just because I can doesn't mean it isn't a pain in the ass to do it," Ragna said as he turned his burner off and threw off his apron to the rack. "Fine then, let's get this damn thing over with."

"Hold on just a second," Levi said as she looked over the paper. "It says here that you'll have to take someone else with you. They're not taking anything other than two wizards from the guild. Sorry, but that's the way it is. I won't be able to help you either; I already have a job lined up with Jet and Droy."

"Not a problem, and thanks for your help getting me this far," Ragna told her as he weighed his options. 'If this is going to an escort job, I should probably ask someone on the saner side of Fairy Tail tag along. That means that the obvious pick is…' "Lu-"

"By the way Lucy, are you ready for the training I had planned for today?" Erza asked with horrible timing, cutting Ragna off immediately. With a look at the two, he clearly realized that he was out of luck. Lucy looked like she was clearly not ready, but one look at Erza's focused eyes made it clear to Ragna that he wasn't getting between this no matter how much he wanted to.

'At least I won't have to put her through whatever crap I'm dealing with,' he considered, admittedly taking a little fatherly comfort in that thought. Glancing around for his Guildmates that hadn't already left on jobs, Ragna weighed his options. 'Elfman's whole manly shtick would probably upset any guards or butlers the client's got with her, best leave him be. Mira's certainly sane, but I don't have any idea what sort of magic she can use and she'd probably have to stay here and head the front desk. Cana seems serious enough, but she's already spent most of the day drinking. As for Loke…' Ragna then glanced at the wizard as he sat off in the corner.

"You're so handsome," cooed the attractive young woman in his right arm.

"And so very charming," sighed the appealing lady resting on his left.

"Thanks, kind of you to say," he said cooly as he shot them both a smile which was enough to make them both swoon a bit.

'WHY THE HELL AM I EVEN CONSIDERING HIM FOR THIS!?' Ragna thought enraged as a tick mark appeared on his forehead. 'But he might somehow be my best choice here, if that damn womanizer can keep his flirting down... dammit, this really is like dealing with a second Kagura.' "Loke, you think you can help me on this one?"

"Dad! Why the heck are you choosing him the first time you need help with something!?" Natsu shouted, clearly upset that Ragna was choosing someone outside the established team. "Come on, I'm good for this job!"

"No you aren't," Gray told him off. "Last time you tried to escort someone you ended up burning their hair off."

"It's not my fault their wig was so flammable!" Natsu shouted. "And the last time you escorted someone you froze them solid!"

"I told you that was to keep them safe, Flame Breath!" Gray shouted in insult.

"Frost Boy!"

"Volcano Head!"

"Glacier Brain!"

...Somehow the two had forgotten Erza's presence at the guild, likely by growing used to her more recent absence. Putting down her fork though she was only halfway done with her slice of cake, she rose from her chair and…

WHACK! WHACK!

Watched in slight surprise as Ragna delivered a powerful and deliberate blow to both of the boys' heads. She considered the fact that he was taking a responsibility that had been hers for quite some time… before deciding it wasn't worth interrupting her favorite dessert and took her seat to finish her prized sweet.

"If you both don't stop this fighting I'm going to get a migraine and then everyone's going to have a problem," he threatened with a one-eyed scowl. "Natsu, think about it. This job said that they were only taking two wizards and they weren't going to budge on that. Coming with me would mean that you'd have to leave Happy behind. Could you really stand that idea?"

"Nope, Natsu and I always stick together!" Happy said in agreement. "Kinda like you and comments about your age…"

"Dammit, I want to say you're wrong," Ragna growled as his head slumped forward for only a moment before looking back to the Fire Wizard. "Besides, this job's going to be putting us on a wagon; you know how brutal this job would be with your motion sickness."

"I guess you've got a point," Natsu reluctantly agreed.

"What about me?" Gray asked. "I don't mind getting left behind for this, but I was wondering what made you skip me over."

"No offense, but that's pretty easy. Look down." Gray headed the Reaper's words, only to appear in shock one more as he realized that he'd stripped down to his underwear once more. "Even if you don't mean to do it, stripping down to your boxers in front of some uppity noble is going to cause problems and I have a lot riding on this particular job." Ragna fought back a sigh. "Look, I'll still have six other ingredients to grab after this so you'll have a chance to help me out then, besides maybe that way I can bring you along for something a bit more violent."

"Alright, I'll hold you to that," Natsu conceded. "But if Loke screws this up I get to say I told you so!"

"...Okay, that's fair," the Reaper accepted, allowing Natsu to crack a grin while Gray only groaned at his guildmate's behavior. "So how about it Loke, ready to make some easy cash? That is... if you're not too busy goofing around?"

"Whose g-?" Leo had been about to say, before realizing the stern look Erza was sending his way. This let him know that if he turned down his guildmate's request for help, Lucy might just have an impromptu training partner. Not bad, but he'd rather get to know the blonde under circumstances where he didn't have to deal with broken bones. "...Sorry ladies, but I'm afraid duty calls."

"Aw already? Who knew that work was more important than me?" one of the girls said with a pout, causing Ragna to grow closer to developing a migraine as he desperately wished to get out of here.

"Make sure you come back to see me soon," the other said as she gave his side a small squeeze.

"Of course; that's a promise I can always make good on," the womanizer assured.

'Goddammit, I can already tell this is going to be one hell of a day,' Ragna decides. 'Just focus on getting paid, that's all you have to do today.' "We're off then."

"Best of luck!" Lucy wished him with her own smile. "I'll see you both when you get back… as long as I survive." At her last worried comment, Ragna gave her a warm smile before ruffling her blonde hair with his good hand.

"You'll do fine, I'll see ya for dinner," he reassured her before he and Loke exited the guild, Loke of course taking a moment to wave the young girls off with sweet promises that Ragna did his best to tune out. "I just noticed, those two aren't the same girls from when I first got into the guild."

"Should they have been?" Loke asked. "I can let those two know that you're interested in them."

"Not what I was getting at," Ragna told him with a groan. "Remember; I need this job to go well today, so no flirting with the client."

"Don't worry, I'll do my part and then some; I'm usually voted pretty high in the Wizard I Want to Be My Boyfriend Contest."

"And that's exactly what I'm trying to get you to avoid," he said, shaking his head with dismay. "Why the hell did Lucy have to be busy today?"

"Speaking of Lucy," Loke began, leading Ragna to scowl. "...How does she treat her Celestial Spirits?"

"Treat 'em?" Ragna repeated with an eyebrow raised. "Afraid I don't know what you're talking about."

"It's exactly how it sounds. Is she kind to them? Does she treat them well?" Loke asked.

"I haven't seen anything that tells me otherwise, and I can't imagine her treating any of them poorly… Don't know the spirits that well, but I know Lucy well enough," Ragna said as Loki only looked thoughtful at that information. "Though I guess you should know…"

"Know what?"

"She's off limits," he told him with a stern look. Loke almost looked taken aback by how feral Ragna could look with only his left eye… but the Reaper dropped the expression quickly enough. "I mean, not that she can't tell you off herself."

"Sounds more like you're just playing the role of team father," Loke told him with a smile. "The way you managed to turn both Gray and Natsu down seemed pretty fatherly as well. Quite the bond to have after working here for less than a month."

"Natsu ended up giving me the nickname a week in, but it was moreso out of a spiteful joke, and I either had my choice of being called dad or old man… I just took the more bearable option."

"Maybe, but I get the feeling you're enjoying the role more than you're willing to let on," Loke suggested. "How did Erza take the news?"

"She joined in," Ragna told Loke bluntly, causing the womanizer to freeze in his stride. "...I'm not sure where that's coming from either."

"Huh," Loke notes before looking at the job instructions they'd been given. "This looks like the cafe that the job told us about. I've been here a couple of times with…" He paused again, this time patting frantically over his body.

"Now what?"

"I think I dropped my wallet somewhere!" Loke said with worry. "And if I left it back at the guild either Cana's going to use it to order drinks, Natsu's going to order a ton of food, or Erza's going to-!" Without another word, Loke turned and started running back to Fairy Tail.

"Hey, we're just about to meet our client! They're waiting for us inside!" he shouted.

"Just give me a second! I'll catch up!" he promised as he was already a good distance away. Giving a hollow sigh on how this job hadn't even started yet, Ragna headed inside the small cafe listed on the job description.

-And then what happened!-

'Aaaaaaaaand this is exactly what I was afraid of,' Ragna thought to himself as he looked at the scowling noble's daughter before him. She was dressed in a rather frilly white dress that might've reminded him of a wedding dress if it hadn't been for the occasional feather accessory that decorated it. As expected, she had an elderly butler with her as a guide with his nose up in the air as he refused to acknowledge Ragna's presence. 'Dammit, I already know how this job's going to go… all that's up in the air is if I'm really willing to stick around for the slightest chance that I'll be paid for this.'

"This has got to be some kind of a sick joke," the young noble said to him before she sipped the fine tea she'd ordered from the cafe. "Are you really a wizard from Fairy Tail? You don't look like one. And where's your partner?"

Trying to stay focused on the ingredient and money that he desperately needed, Ragna took a deep breath before causing his Fairy Tail insignia to glow around his still paralyzed right eye. "As for my-"

"I'm not done you cur! Don't open that horrid mouth of yours unless I speak to you directly!"

'...Starting to miss Granny from this morning, in fact I'm beginning to see her point,' the Reaper considered darkly.

"Listen here; even if you are somehow from the famous Fairy Tail guild, the only reason I'd be caught dead talking to someone like you is if I had no other choice. Stupid private train needing repairs at the last moment! Stupid dad saying I have to take two guards with me to get back!"

'She's complaining so much when she's literally using daddy's money? Must be nice,' Ragna considered, decided he'd just use a bit of bleak humor to try and cope.

"And to top it off I'm forced to endure this subpar cafe with this atrocious atmosphere," she continued in insult.

'Pretty sure the atmosphere of this place was fine until you showed up,' Ragna noted, glancing around the cafe which had several younger women there who were dead silent and trying not to stare at the noble's daughter. He felt a bit sorry for them given present circumstances, but there wasn't anything he could do… actually…

"And the swill this place serves! Ugh, I should like my father to buy this horrid place out and put it under new management."

The waitresses working at the establishment cringed as their business was insulted , but quickly turned to confusion when they heard giggling from their other patrons. Floating right above the young noble lady where neither her nor he butler were looking was a single glowing word.

Brat

"See?" she continued, still not realizing the word above her. "Now that someone with actual taste can judge this wretched little dump, they full heartedly agree with me."

Ragna gave his hand a subtle wave as it gave off the slightest of glows. The patrons and waitresses noticed easily enough, but neither the butler nor the noble lady noticed.

Dense

"As you can clearly see, I already have plenty of commoners who would take great pleasure in escorting me back home, so what makes you so special?"

"I'm not, I'm just the first guy that showed up," Ragna told her, before waving his hand again, creating another Image Cantrip that he'd learned from reading earlier that week. "But think about it, the sooner I start escorting you home the sooner I can get you out of here."

Translation: I'll get this pain in the ass out of your shop quick as I can

"Wh-What's going on? Why is everyone laughing?" she demanded, searching over the cafe and only finding laughing girls while her potential hiree remained stoic. Luckily, Ragna had the mind to dispel his little parlor trick before she caught sight of it.

"Most likely they've gone mad in your presence, milady," he butler suggested, finally breaking his formal silence. "Their megar brains are slowly overheating as they wrack their minds to come even close to your radiance…" He sent the entire restaurant a stink eye. "...It is a rather daunting task for them."

The collection of girls then scowled as they had their looks insulted by the old man as said butler's master seemed very pleased at his choice of words. Ragna, not being one to let this go (and having WAY too many of these saved up after dealing with Rachel and Valkenhayn) waved his hand and created his next image. At first it was just a straight vertical line nearly as tall as the butler and they didn't see what he was trying, but then he added an arrow point at the line and a caption beside it.

This is how long the stick up my ass is

"Wh-what are these crazy commoners laughing at!?" the noble lady demanded, quickly scouring the room (but not quick enough to see Ragna's magic)

"No clue, but if it's infectious maybe you should get out of here soon," the Reaper offered, trying to use circumstances to his favor.

"...Very well, the words uttered by your ill spoken tongue may have some truth behind them," the woman insulted. "As soon as your partner arrives we'll be off. But if they're willing to team up with you, I'm not expecting much."

'Dammit, this ingredient better be worth it,' Ragna thought before hearing a bell jingle as the door behind him opened. "Took you long enough."

"Luckily I was just in time, another minute and Cana's order would've cleared my wallet out," Loke said before turning to the patrons of the small cafe and turning his charm factor back on. "Hey everyone, how's it been?"

"LOKE'S BACK!" one of the girls cried out with a swoon.

"COME OVER HERE AND SIT WITH US!" another begged.

"I HAVE SOME OF THOSE SWEETS THAT YOU LOVE! DO YOU WANT SOME!?" one of the waitresses offered.

'Well there goes any points I might've just earned with them,' the Reaper decided, admittedly feeling a little bitter. He'd been expecting the young noble woman to chide them on their behavior, but at present it looked like she was a little too busy staring at Loke… looking deep into the wizard's shade covered eyes. 'Ah hell, really?'

"A-Are you going to be guiding me to my estate?" she asked him, a slight blush on her face and a bit of trouble finding her voice.

"If you wish it, then be guarding you every bit of our travels… ensuring your safety as closely as I can," Loke promised, taking one of the dainty ladies hands in his own and kissing it. Ragna noticed the scowling eyes coming from most of the women at this establishment, but it seemed that they were more angry at the woman for taking their precious Loke's attention. "And my partner will be with us of course, to ensure the details of the contract are met."

"I love a man of business," she said with a satisfied smile, though it was clear Ragna might as well not have existed to her. "I am Lady Kura Poulet. We'll depart at once." Holding Loke's right arm within her own (and causing the girls quite a bit more anger), she, Loke, and her now scowling butler headed for the door.

'Son of a bitch. So now not only is he getting attention from every girl in a mile just by showing his mug, he managed to get that stuck up pain in the ass to open up to him and he's already breaking my no flirting with the client rule,' Ragna though as he fought back an annoyed growl. 'This just isn't my-'

"Excuse me, sir?" one of the waitresses asked from behind Ragna. He quickly caught sight of the small bag of sweets that she was holding onto.

"Oh sorry, did she order those?" he asked.

"Actually they're for you," she told him.

"I… didn't ask for anything," he explained. 'That and I'm broke as piss.'

"They're compliments from the table over there," she explained while gesturing. Looking at the table, Ragna caught sight of several young girls smiling as they waved to him. "And… on behalf of our small cafe, thank you very much for the entertainment you provided."

"Oh, I get it," Ragna said as he took the bag of what appeared to be macaroons and shot a smirk to the ladies that had ordered these for them. "You're welcome then." He headed for the door to join his partner and (hopefully) get this job done with, but on his way out he couldn't help but catch wind of what the ladies at the table were saying.

"I had no idea an old guy like that could be almost as cool as my Loke," one of them sighed.

"I know…" another added dreamily. "Just imagine if he were twenty years younger."

'...It's half a damn victory Ragna, TAKE IT.'

And then!

'At least I don't have to sit next to her,' the Reaper considered as he sat beside the still scowling butler as they traveled across the countryside. Kura's arms hadn't been detached from Loke's for even a second as she held the womanizer gingerly close to her, resting her head upon his shoulder. Loke himself seemed plenty satisfied with the situation, looking at both men with a smug gaze behind his sunglasses. 'And I can't even just take a nap and let these things play out since I'm supposed to be on guard duty.' "So-"

"Ah ah, hired wizards aren't supposed to speak unless spoken to," Kura chided mockingly. Screw the reward to fix his arm, Ragna was starting to lose his mind.

"Maybe let my partner talk, just this once?" Loke suggested at no invitation. "He might have something important to ask about our job."

"If you say so dearest Loki," she answered sweetly.

'GET. ME. OUT OF HERE.' "...You said that you needed to hire us for guard duty, but what exactly are we supposed to be guarding you from?" he asked while fighting to keep his temper down.

"Oh all sorts of nasties that might be after us," she told him, but likely only because Loke had asked her to. "Highway bandits, rouges hoping to demand ransom from my father, Forest Vulcans."

"Forest Vulcans?" Ragna asked, remembering the monster he'd beaten under Everlue's Manor during his first job as an official Fairy Tail wizard. "Do they frequently attack travelers on the roads?"

"Frequently enough that I'll need my Loke-kun to keep me safe," Kira told him, sighing as she seemed to hold Loke's arm all the tighter. While this woman's attitude was pissing the Reaper off plenty, he also tried to accept the fact that if Loke was the one dealing with her it'd mean less of a headache for him. "Doubly so given the goods I'm carrying."

'Goods?' Ragna thought to himself, only seeing a few packages in the back which he'd assumed was the girl's luggage.

"She means her family's special eggs," Loke explained. "Generations back they spent all of their resources towards breeding the perfect chickens. Now, I hear that the birds themselves are actually poisonous to eat, but the eggs themselves are heavenly."

"I'm glad to hear you're such a connoisseur of fine dining," the lady complimented yet again. "Yes, the birds are nearly the size of a horse and the eggs they lay are the size of your head. The quality is so good that most Wizards would give up any money we offered for just a single egg!" Her claims at Ragna done, she then turned back to her interest. "Of course if you'd like sweet Loke, I could maybe send you home with a full dozen?"

"Just the two are fine," he assured.

"Such a gentleman."

'...At least he's not happy either,' Ragna thought as he glanced at the butler, taking just the slightest bit of solace at the man's own angry expression. It was then that the carriage lurched a bit before coming to a stop. "Great, what now?"

"F-Forest Vulcans!" the driver called from outside. "Th-they're surrounding us!" Ragna then managed to pick up the bestial grunts coming from outside. It sounded a little similar to the beast that he'd encountered before, only now a few of them were chanting 'Egg!' with a deep hunger behind it. "G-Get the wizards out here now!"

"Well now," Loke said as he started to rise, though Kura was still holding onto his arm. "Looks like-"

"Forget it," Ragna growled as he quickly got to his feet and threw the door open. "You stay here; I'm handling this trash." With a grunt he slammed it behind him as the Vulcans outside seemed to grow even more excited.

"What a complete brute," the butler commented with disgust. "It's like he can't wait to get into a fight."

'More like he can't wait to get out of this carriage,' Loke admitted. He also noticed that the lady he was supposed to be guarding was gripping him even tighter, nearly climbing onto him as she held him close through her fright… was the message she was trying to portray.

Her fantasy going through her mind was clear as crystal to her. The nameless Wizard would fight against an endless hoard of Forest Vulcans. He'd put up a decent fight for someone of his age, but eventually the beasts would overwhelm him and it would be up to her hero to save them all. Loke would go into battle, holding her close for safety as he used his magic to slay the vile creatures. Afterwards, he'd look deep into her eyes and tell her that he was-

"Done," Ragna muttered as the door to the carriage opened once more, snapping Kura out of her fantasy. With an aggressive huff, the Reaper took a seat beside the butler. "Come on, the driver's waiting on you to say the word before we get going."

"Huh-? I-? What happened to the Vulcans?" she demanded.

"What else? I went out and beat them into next week," he returned casually, far too casually for the butler's tastes. "That's what you hired me for, isn't it?"

"You beat them!?" she screamed at him. "HOW!?"

"I punched 'em."

"You… punched them?" she demanded.

"Yeah, I've got one arm that's good for that at least," he reaffirmed. "Why… do you look so upset?"

'...Now,' Loke thought to himself cockily to himself as he looked to both men sitting across from him. "Sorry, but do you think the two of you can wait outside for a bit?" Ragna gave a growl as the womanizer was pushing his luck just a bit.

"We should be going," he tried to affirm.

"No no, I think you should check to make sure you got all of the Vulcans," the noble told him quickly before addressing her butler. "You should go with him; better to two pairs… well three eyes for a lookout."

"Milady, you know I can't do that!" the butler protested. "Your father put me in charge of your safety and-!"

"LEAVE. US."

Kura's voice had turned so possessive and feral that even Ragna was caught off guard… before remembering Nu and knowing he'd dealt with far worse. The butler could only grit his teeth as he headed out of the small carriage. Ragna followed behind, though he gave one last stink eye at Loke for what he was doing. Closing the carriage door behind him, Ragna did keep his eye out of the Vulcans he'd beaten… though he admitted being away from the brat he was escorting wasn't exactly unpleasant. The butler didn't say a word to him, only pacing nervously in front of the carriage door. Hoping to rid himself of all present company Ragna wondered how long this would take.

Not very long, as Loke soon emerged from the carriage. The butler looked like he had some stern words for the wizard, only to see that Loke appeared to be as fresh as when he'd been left. No ruffled hair, no loose clothes, not a mark on his face or neck. Ignoring the playboy, he headed into the carriage to talk to the young noble he served.

"Mind telling me what the hell that was about?" Ragna demanded.

"Just wanted to discuss something with our employer," Loke told him seriously. "Her butler will be getting your payment in just a moment."

"My payment? What are you on about, I don't think we're even halfway there," he growled as he thought of the journey he still had ahead of him. "Why the hell would she be paying me now?"

"Because I suggested it to her, and because she'd clearly love it if you were out of the way so she can have me all to herself." That last part hadn't sounded like a brag, but even if it had been Ragna was more than willing to let Loke get every bit of that crazy. "Her butler certainly isn't going to like the idea of sitting up front with the coachman to keep lookout."

"...I don't understand, why are you doing this?" the Reaper hissed. "You'll get the two of us in trouble."

"No, I'll get in trouble for this, and believe you me that I'm used to this kind of trouble. If anyone asks, I'll tell them that you fought tooth and nail to finish the job properly, but Kura and I managed to force you out of the way. We even had to double your cut of the Jewels in order to get you out of the picture since you're so duty bound." He smirked. "When the truth is you can't wait to get out of here and I'm giving you an out to go along with some well deserved extra pay."

'...There's more to this guy than I thought,' Ragna realized before answering with his own cocky grin. "So everyone wins?"

"Everyone except for the butler."

"Screw 'em."

"I knew you'd see it my way," Loke chuckled. "But I should remind you that you're walking back on your own to Magnolia. That's not a problem is it?"

"If every step back is one father from those two then I'm ready for a marathon," the Reaper asserted. "Not that it's any of my business, but what were you planning to do with your egg?"

"That's easy; when I bring it in for breakfast tomorrow I'll be expecting you to make one hell of an omelette. I'll even let you take half for yourself."

"You got it; bell peppers, mushrooms, cheese, and whatever else you want in it," Ragna promised as he and Loke actually shook hands. 'Guess he's a real member of Fairy Tail after all.'

It didn't take too much longer for Kura to convince her butler of Loke's suggestion, though it was clear he was enraged at the two Wizards. Thrusting the reward into Ragna's hands he climbed onto the front of the carriage, taking the time to send one final departing scowl back at the Reaper… but since Ragna had already gotten his reward, nothing was keeping him from flipping the old fart off in response. Watching the carriage finally take off, Ragna started making his way back to the guild.

"Grr…" Emerging from the treeline was the same group of Vulcans that Ragna had just beaten back. They eagerly eyed the egg he carried, up until Ragna sent it to his storage. "HUMAN TAKE AWAY EGG! BRING BACK EGG HUMAN!"

"I don't think so. I had to put up with a hell of a lot of work to get that damn thing," Ragna told the monster before summoning his sword to his hand with a ruthless sneer. "And I've still got plenty of anger issues to work through. YOU IDIOTS SHOULD'VE STAYED DOWN!"

With a heavy roar from both sides, Ragna and the Forest Vulcan's charged each other… the Reaper ready for the most fun he'd had all day.

Author's Note

Happy: So that's the start of your first filler Arc?

Storm Reaper VII: Yep, this is the start of Ragna regaining control of his eye and arm. I'm saving the reconnection to his BlazBlue for later, but I hope this gets most of you closer to what you wanted.

H: So it's going to be about seven chapters long? One for each ingredient?

S: Probably eight since I've got something fun planned for when he finally has to take the elixir, but yeah. I'm also planning on giving him some one on one time with all of the members of Fairy Tail, so that should help make it fly by. Let me know in the comments you think his next job should be with. Now for the reviews.

H: Wait, our skit's that short this week!?

S: ...Aye.

H: THAT'S NOT YOUR WORD!

Dread Alpha Prime: You might have to say that again given how long this took.

Veesmaster: I am too, this can be fun to write for.

LuciferXII: Not exactly, he just somehow looks thirty years or so younger… which is somehow even weirder.

Spartastic 4: Yeah, I need to go back for some editing.

Lightkirinhuruname: And this again…

Astrefernal: Sorry for the wait.

The Unplanner: I know, so much wasted potential for the show to just throw that away.

Darkpit65: I think the right word is eccentric.

Epsilon the Blue Ace: Honestly everything is canon.

Kyoji The BlueAce: I did a bit of that last chapter, but I have a few ideas in mind.

Oni Makai: So… should I say it?

Mystech Master: Everyone in the Fairy Tail universe has a unique quirk. Natsu has unyielding motion sickness, Gray strips, Cana drinks more than should be humanly possible… Ragna looks old when he can't open both of his eyes. And yeah, early to mid twenties.

98: Thanks, I always like these settings myself.

Guest: Aw, kind of you to say so.

Webb360: Of course, I try to keep up to date with most of them.

Guest (2): Updated.

Fortitude501: Like asked earlier, early to mid twenties… Everyone just thought he was so much older.

Xeizhr: ...I can't tell if that's a compliment or not.

Slackboy101: Probably just Ragna here… sorry.

F. R. G. T. P.: The thing is, Ragna doesn't have access to his usual moves just yet. If he did, he'd clearly be screaming them like he does in most of my other stories.

That's all for now!

Ciao!