48,960 minutes. 816 hours. 34 days. 5 weeks. Dean would've counted the seconds but that would take him forever even though, with Roman, it would've been worth it.

48,960 minutes ago, Dean would've thought Roman was still worth it because 48,960 minutes ago Roman had cared for Dean. They were a team then. There was no "One Versus the World" but "Two Versus The World." Roman gave a damn about him, or well he thought so at least. But that was long ago now.

Because exactly 816 hours ago, Roman came out to take care of Dean in the ring. He also took care of him out of it too. They hung out a lot more then because they were friends, no no they were brothers…maybe they were more. But Dean didn't want to dwell on that because 816 hours ago, Roman was next to him making sure he was okay. Dean wasn't okay but Roman's careful caring hands and affectionate eyes had made him feel okay. Even for just those few seconds Roman stared into him; Dean was okay. Not crazy, not a lunatic but okay. But that was long ago.

34 days ago to be exact. 34 days ago Roman's lips had touched Dean's for the first time. And it was magic, pure magic. And shit, Ambrose would never say it out loud but it made him feel alive. Wanted. Cared for. Because 34 days ago Roman had breathed Dean's name into his mouth and Dean never thought his own name could taste so good. He never knew his body could be touched like that…loved like that. If Dean could call it love…what did he know? Once upon a time he thought Seth loved him but that was wrong. And once upon a time, 34 days ago, he thought Roman was in love with him…but he was wrong again, apparently. That's no surprise. Who could love such an emotionally dismembered man like him? His own mother couldn't stand him. How could a man like Roman?

Maybe 5 weeks ago he could've asked Roman. He should've asked Roman. The moment it had slipped out of Roman's plump lips and into Dean's heart he should've asked. 'Why? How?' Because then maybe Roman would admit that it wasn't true right there and then Dean wouldn't have to be left hurting 5 weeks later.

Because the pair had spent so long together. And it was cruel, real fucking cruel, to leave Dean like this. With no one…again. Like always. He hated Roman so much. Except he didn't. He loved Roman…loves Roman. But Roman doesn't love him even after all this time…

1,577,847 minutes. 26,297 hours. 1,095 days. 156 weeks. Together. Dean would've counted the seconds but that would take him forever even though, with Roman, it's worth it.