SpongeBob Can't Drive

By Shadowgate

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AN: For the record I am no fan of SpongeBob. However my friend Gojirules requested this crossover and Rampage was quite a game back in the day. So here is a whacky SpongeBob Story.

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One Saturday SpongeBob was driving to the Crabby Patty Shack. Today things would not be normal, well even more abnormal than usual. Just the fact that SpongeBob was driving at all troubled many under the sea. It certainly bothered the one who gave him the Goddamn license.

Today however SpongeBob was bothered by two monsters. One was green and scaly. It was clearly capable of surviving under water. SpongeBob saw a second monster. This monster was a giant gorilla with fucking scuba gear.

That monster kicked SpongeBob's car and sent his far flipping. When SpongeBob got out of his car he had a bloody nose.

SpongeBob yelled "GODDAMN IT I'VE HAD BETTER DAYS THAN THIS!"

Squidworth walked up to SpongeBob and said "the days are bad enough with you around but now two large monsters are fighting in the sea."

SpongeBob said "Squidworth I'm getting the impression that all this time you hated me."

Squidworth said "well how about that a car accident knocked your head into the right thinking position. Yes I've always fucking hated you. But that's irrelevant we must fight off the monsters."

SpongeBob asked how that could be done.

Squidworth explained "first your friend Patrick is at home crying so he won't be of any help. Second you're useless and you've always been fucking useless. I will be the one who stops these monsters."

SpongeBob scoffs at the idea.

The two monsters start fighting. Squidworth pulls out his flute and plays the melody of a legendary tune called Lady of the Lake.

All of the sudden a powerful woman of the sea with great muscles and a ton of rage approaches the small underwater town. Both monsters screeched and then the Lady grabbed them. She crushed their heads with her bare hands. Then all was peaceful. Sharks came and ate the remains of the two dead monsters.

THE END