Title: While the Cat's Away

Author: magika_draconia

Other pairings/threesome: None

Rating: Gen

Word count: 1,272

Content/Warning(s): None (unless you count feline-swears)

Prompt: Eileen Prince is a sweet old cat lady. She's determined to marry Severus off to dear Dr. Potter, the local veterinarian. Severus is just tired of being covered with kittens.

A/N: This was originally supposed to be a non-magic AU - or at least vague enough that the reader could make their own mind up. Unfortunately, a tiny bit of magic somehow crept in, and wouldn't easily come out again, so now it's just a regular-old AU.

There were times when Severus Snape heartily regretted the necessity that meant he had to move back in with his mother for the summer.

Like the times he woke himself up with a gigantic sneeze, and the cat that had been sleeping over his head – and whose tail had been under his nose – had scored furrows down the side of his head in a futile attempt to remain in place before deciding to find a safer spot and spring-boarding away.

Or when the cats draped over his hip and lower leg also objected to the unexpected movement and dug their claws in, accompanied by the offended yowl of the cat who'd settled behind his knees and whose comfy spot had just been disrupted.

Or the times when he made his way from bedroom to bathroom in a bizarre game of hop, skip and jump, trying to avoid little paws and tails, leaving a chorus of pained cries behind him to indicate just how unsuccessful he'd been.

Or the times when his every move was scrutinised by a large grey cat that seemed to consider the bathroom as his domain.

Or the times when he forgot to cast an Imperturbable Charm over his breakfast, and consequently found himself hacking up hairballs almost as big as the ones the actual cats produced.

Or – such as this morning – when he heard the inevitable, "Severus, poor Tiddles looks a bit unwell. Would you take him to the vet for me, there's a dear boy. I would go myself, but I'm a bit busy this morning . . ." from his mother.

The names changed frequently – Tiddles, Tinker, Patch, Fluffy, Adamantia, Mr Purrlock, Jingles – but the excuses remained the same. His mother was never busy, unless you counted waiting hand and foot on over twenty felines, but she hadn't set foot outside of their house since his father – God rot his soul – had finally started a fight he couldn't win, and it didn't look as though she planned to any time soon, either.

So, inevitably, Severus found himself pushed out of the house clinging to a battered cat carrier, whose occupant was usually making the sorts of noises you'd expect to hear from a demon summoned from the depths of Hell.

"Back again, Mr Snape?" the brunette receptionist at the local vet's office greeted him, eyeing the carrier warily. "Who is it this time?"

Barely refraining from rolling his eyes, Severus placed the carrier on the floor and turned it so the door was facing the counter. Unfortunately, this did nothing to allay the occupant's fears – or temper – and the aggravated yowls increased in volume. "Yes, here again, Miss Brown," he responded. "Apparently Tiddles is unwell." This time, he couldn't stop his exasperated reflex.

Miss Brown nodded, looking ever so slightly relieved, even as she winced at a particular raucous yowl. Tiddles was not the worst patient he could have brought in. "Take a seat, Mr Snape," she said. "I'll let Doctor Potter know you're here."

Somehow, I suspect he already knows that, Severus thought, but said nothing as he reluctantly scooped up the carrier and retreated to an empty chair in the far corner. A Doberman nearby sniffed in the carrier's direction with interest, but an irate hiss-and-spit caused him to hurriedly retreat behind his owner's legs.

The staff well aware of what could happen if this particular cat was left waiting for too long, it was barely five minutes before the young man standing in the doorway to the back office was calling, "Tiddles Prince!"

Ignoring the grumbles of, "I was here first!" and, "Been waitin' an hour already!" Severus scooped up the carrier and crossed the room.

"Hello again, Mr Snape!" Doctor Potter greeted him, cheerfully, closing the door behind Severus. "And what's the problem today?"

Dumping the carrier – perhaps not as gently as he should have – onto the table, Severus scowled down at it. "Apparently, Tiddles is . . . unwell," he said, his upper lip curling into a sneer. He hated this – coming here with so little information as to be laughable. He couldn't remember the last time the vet had actually found anything wrong with any of the blasted felines.

It's just for a few more weeks, he reminded himself for the umpteenth time. Then I'll be back at school, and Mum will either have to take them herself, or admit that they're fine.

The vet made a humming sound, well used to this by now. Severus had been here every other day for the past three weeks, never with the same cat yet, and all of them 'unwell'. "Well, let's get Tiddles out and have a look, then," he suggested.

Reaching over to unlock the door, Severus stood well back as he opened it, fully prepared for a raging ball of fur and knives to emerge.

Nothing happened.

"'s alright," the vet said, making a movement as though to pat Severus on the shoulder. He hastily retracted his arm at seeing Severus scowl. "Most cats take a bit of coaxing to come out." He reached for the carrier, which Severus gladly relinquished to him. "Here, kitty, kitty," the vet crooned, bending down to peer into the carrier.

Hmm. Severus considered the view in front of him. Suddenly, this farcical trip just got better. Perhaps Mum knew what she was doing, after all.

When he blinked his brain back into gear as the wonderful view diminished slightly – unfortunately hidden by the white lab coat the vet was wearing – he realised that Doctor Potter was now holding the carrier so that the open door was over the table and shaking it ever so slightly. "Come on," he was muttering. "Come out of there!"

Peering around the man's shoulder showed that Tiddles was clinging frantically to the top end of the carrier, his claws firmly through the gaps, and cursing at them fluently in feline.

"Nope, he's not coming out of there," Doctor Potter finally admitted, lowering the carrier to sit in its correct position on the table. "Doesn't seem like there's much wrong with him, either, at least from what I can see."

"I'm sure Mum will be delighted," said Severus, dryly.

The vet made an unidentifiable noise, clearly aware that the announcement wouldn't stop Eileen Prince from sending another 'unwell' cat to see him in two days time. And then another two days after that. And, eventually, Tiddles would come back as well.

While Severus closed the carrier again, to a renewed fury of spiteful hissing from the indignant Tiddles, Doctor Potter was scribbling something on a card.

"Here," he said, finally, handing it to Severus. "So your mum knows he's okay."

Inclining his head, Severus slipped it into his pocket before lifting the carrier. The vet got the door for him before he could even reach for it.

"See you next time, Mr Snape," he said, before calling across to the receptionist, "Next patient, please, Lavender."

Once outside the surgery, Severus paused. Removing the card from his pocket, he examined the messy script on one side that promised "Tiddles in excellent health!" complete with accompanying smiley face. Idly checking the other side, numbers caught his eye.

Perhaps we could go for a drink sometime? was written underneath it, along with what was presumably Doctor Harry Potter's signature, although it was so illegible that Severus would never have known what it said if it wasn't for the sign outside the vet's surgery.

Considering the bright green eyes, tousled black hair, and that absolutely lovely . . . view, Severus thought that maybe, just maybe, he might not actually mind having to return to the surgery after all.